“Scoot over,” he whispers into the dark.
I slide to the other side of the bed and he dives under the covers. The bed bounces and I laugh softly as I roll closer to him and basically land on top of him. I start to pull away but he reaches up, touching his fingers to my cheek.
“I love it when you laugh,” he murmurs. “I love it even more when you’re laughing because of me.”
Before I can blink, he closes the distance between us and presses his lips to mine. The kiss starts out soft, hardly the hottest kiss on the planet, but soon it’s like a match has been struck and we become an inferno.
My palms press against his bare chest as I try to get closer—like I wish I could claw my way inside and sink down into him. One of his hands fists in my hair and the other settles on my waist, dangerously close to my butt. I move so I’m straddling him and he sits up, the movement pressing me more firmly against him and he growls lowly. My heart speeds up at the sound. I love that I unravel him in a way I’ve never seen him come undone before.
His hand on my waist tightens to a bruising pressure, but I don’t mind. My hands move up his chest and wrap around his neck. He nips at my bottom lip and I moan.
We’re playing with fire, straddling a dangerous line of getting caught before we figure our shit out, but I can’t seem to stop this. I don’t want to stop this. I’ve been denying myself what I want for years, trying to save other people’s feelings, but I’m done with that because what I want is important too and I want Xander in a way I’ve never wanted another person before. It’s always been him, and while getting married wasn’t in my plans, it might not be the worst thing that’s ever happened—not that I’m going to tell him that.
He moves suddenly so my back is pressed into the bed and he hovers above me. I arch up, missing the feel of his body pressed to mine, and he obliges by lowering so we’re flush. I nearly sigh in relief and wrap my legs around his waist. He groans and his hands slide up my shirt, little by little, until he finds my breasts. I’m not wearing a bra and he makes a sound of approval, deepening the kiss. He cups my breasts, and even though they’re not the largest in the world, he doesn’t seem to mind.
He breaks the kiss long enough to tear my shirt off and then his lips are back. This kiss is unlike any other I’ve ever had. It’s like we’re dancing to a song that only the two of us know. His thumb rubs against my nipple and my hips buck.
“Xander,” I moan into his mouth, but the word is barely distinguishable as English. “Please,” I beg, but I don’t really know what I’m begging for.
He kisses down my neck, between my breasts, and over my stomach.
When he reaches the area above my sleep shorts, he presses one last kiss and then looks at me with heated eyes.
My heart sounds like thunder in my ears, drowning out my thoughts.
I can see Xander warring with himself, with whether or not he should stop, and frankly, I don’t know what I want him to do. The rational part of my brain screams that we shouldn’t do this, but fuck it, I want to.
“Thea,” he whispers and he sounds pained. I think maybe he wants me to stop him, but I can’t. I can’t find the words, because my throat is clogged with everything I want and don’t want to say.
He moves back up my body and kisses me deeply, branding himself on my soul. My fingers wind into his hair and I tug on the dark strands.
His hand ghosts over my stomach and slips beneath my shorts. I gasp and then bite his lip as he slips a finger inside me. I clench around him and I’m pretty sure I whimper.
His touch is heaven and hell all in one.
His eyes find mine and they’re shimmering with desire. I can’t believe that he’s looking at me like that.
I grasp his face between my hands and our lips hover near each other, barely touching, sharing breaths.
His eyes dart down, looking beneath the covers where his hand disappears. I whimper as he applies more pressure and my breath picks up.
Close. So close.
And then I fall off the ledge and he drowns out my cry of pleasure with a kiss.
He pulls his hand from my shorts and lays down, draping my body across his. I can barely breathe but I start to move, to give him the relief he just gave me, but he shakes his head and tightens his hold on me so I can’t move.
“This was about you, not me.”
I lay my head on his chest. “Has anyone ever told you that you’re too nice?”
He chuckles. “Maybe once or twice.”
“Your blue balls are going to hate you later,” I warn him.
He chuckles and kisses the end of my nose. “Yeah, well, some sacrifices are worth it. Baby steps,” he murmurs and kisses me again, this time on the lips, but it’s simply a peck unlike the passionate one from moments before. Just the same, it leaves me weak in the knees.
It’s in this moment that I realize I’m dangerously close to falling in love with Xander.
When you’ve already loved someone the way I’ve loved him for years, it’s all too easy to fall over the edge into a new kind of love.
A better kind of love.
A forever kind of love.
Xander looks like a kid in a candy store as we stand in the little waiting room and Prue is carried in. I’m seriously expecting him to break out into song and dance at any second.
The nurse hands her to him and he looks like he’s going to explode from happiness. He looks to me with a goofy grin on his face and I find myself smiling in response.
“She was good last night?” he asks.
“A perfect angel.” The nurse nods. “I have some release paperwork for you to sign and then you’re out of here.”
“Excellent.” He sways with Prue in his arms. She’s a medium-sized dog but she looks pretty small in his arms. Her mop of hair falls down in her eyes, and I swear she flicks her head to disperse the hairs so she can see.
We take a seat and Xander holds her in his lap while the nurse goes to get the last of the paperwork.
“What do you think?” Xander asks her. “Are you ready to go home with us?”
Prue shakes her body and I laugh. “I hope that means yes.”
“Of course it does. We’re awesome.”
“All right, guys,” the nurse announces as she breezes back in, “here’s the last of it.”
Xander stands and hands Prue to me and I grunt under her weight. She gives me a look as if to say I’m not that heavy, get over it.
The nurse explains what he’s signing for and he scribbles his signature on the papers.
When he’s done, she hands him his copy and smiles at us.
“I think it’s so nice what you’ve done for Prue. Saving her and giving her a home.”
Xander glances over his shoulder at us and smiles. “Some things are meant to be and will find a way no matter the circumstances.”
My body heats at his words because I know he’s talking about more than just the dog.
We head out to Xander’s truck since we obviously couldn’t ride his bike here.
He opens the door for me and I sit down with Prue in my lap. When the door closes, she raises her paws to the sill and looks out. I ruffle the hair on her head. “You’re going home, girl,” I tell her. Even though I might not be the most animal obsessed person out there, I still like them, and I’m glad she won’t be living on the streets anymore.
Xander gets behind the wheel and slips his sunglasses on. “We’re going for ice cream,” he announces.
“Oh, we are?” I laugh.
“Yep. We have to celebrate.”
“Hey—” I shrug “—I’m not going to complain about ice cream.”
He drives about ten minutes away to a local place. It’s small, with a few seats inside and more outside. He goes inside to order—he doesn’t even ask what I want, he already knows—while I snag one of the picnic tables and sit with Prue. She sits beside me, tail wagging, and leans over to lick my face. I giggle.
“You’re pretty cute,” I te
ll her, scratching behind her ear. Her tail thumps madly and she tilts her head, encouraging me to scratch her neck.
Xander joins us a few minutes later and hands me my chocolate brownie sundae with extra sprinkles on top.
“I will never understand your obsession with unicorn shit.” He grins and sits across from me, taking a bite of his peanut butter sundae.
“They’re sprinkles, not unicorn shit,” I defend.
He eyes my sundae. “Pretty sure you’re wrong.”
I make a big show of licking my spoon. I mean it to be playful but his pupils dilate and I realize what it really looks like and I blush.
We grow quiet, enjoying our ice cream and each other’s company. It’s a nice day, with blue sky and fluffy white clouds. The temperature is warm, but not too hot.
Xander finishes his ice cream first and disappears for a few minutes before returning with a small vanilla ice cream cone.
“Please tell me you’re not eating that.” I laugh.
“Of course not.” He holds the cone out to Prue and her tongue slides out to lick the ice cream. “I gotta feed my other girl.”
Prue takes a few more licks before devouring the entire cone in one bite.
I look at Xander with wide eyes. “Was that safe? What if she chokes?”
Prue licks her mouth and I swear she smiles at us. “See, she’s fine.” He shrugs.
I finish my ice cream and toss it in the nearby trashcan. “We’re so not good at this whole dog parent thing and it hasn’t even been a full day yet,” I tell him. “Heck, it hasn’t even been an hour.”
He picks up Prue and carries her back to the car. “Are you kidding me? We’re great at this.”
I pat his arm. “You keep telling yourself that.”
“Prue, no!” Xander yells. “Bad girl.”
I snicker from the corner. “I told you we weren’t good at this.”
Xander picks up Prue and continues to scold her against chewing on furniture. “You see this?” He picks up a toy. “You chew on this, not the table leg.”
She looks at him with wide innocent eyes and his shoulders sag. “She’s so cute I can’t even be mad. Look at this face.” He holds her out to me.
I shake my head. “You’re such a pushover.”
He sets her on the floor and she immediately runs right back to the table leg. I cross my arms over my chest and raise a brow. “Cade’s going to kill you and I’m going to laugh.”
“You mean, you’re not going to save me?” He pouts and his eyes shimmer with humor.
“You made your bed, now lie in it.”
“It won’t be so bad,” he defends. “She’ll learn.”
“I hope so.” I sigh. “But if she chews up my shark slippers, I’m done.” I raise my hands to emphasize my doneness.
Xander presses his lips together to hold in his laughter. “Your slippers are already falling apart.
“They’re sacred,” I defend.
“Do you even know the definition of sacred?” He smirks and strides forward. He’s so tall that he only has to take two steps before he’s right in front of me. He places his hands on my waist and bends down to kiss me. For a moment, my body seizes with fear at being caught, but then I remind myself that Cade’s at the gym and Rae’s grocery shopping.
“Yes, I know the definition,” I breathe, slightly light-headed from his proximity. His dark eyes flit over my face and I see so many things reflected there. Things that scare me with their intensity. “Why are you looking at me like that?” I whisper the question in the shared air between us.
His tongue slips out, wetting his lips. “Because I see you.”
A shiver runs down my spine. “That makes no sense.” Yes, it does.
His lips turn up slightly but he says no more as he steps back and breaks the moment. I’m growing used to these short and powerful moments between us. It’s like we’re a rubber band pulled back and we can only go so far before we snap together.
Xander picks up Prue and heads for the kitchen.
I watch him disappear from the room, and wonder to myself how I ever thought I could resist him.
That boy is my kryptonite.
It’s been two weeks since Vegas and my period is late.
I sit at the kitchen island, with my head in my hands, hating life. While Xander stands there oblivious with a spatula in one hand and a pan in the other. Under normal conditions, the sight of him about to make breakfast in only his sleep pants with the barest hint of his boxer-briefs peeking out the top would be enough to send me into cardiac arrest.
“How would you like your eggs?” he asks.
My face crumples. “Not fertilized.” Xander looks at me blankly and then when he notes the tears in my eyes it clicks into place for him. “My period’s late,” I confirm, and my chest tightens with the words. Is this what a panic attack feels like?
He sets the pan and spatula down and braces his hands on the counter. He looks at me from beneath his thick lashes and I see the worry there. “Aren’t periods late sometimes? It doesn’t necessarily mean you’re pregnant, right?”
I swallow past the lump in my throat. “My period hasn’t been late in nearly a year, so …” I hesitate and he clenches his jaw, looking away from me.
“Don’t freak out,” he tells me, leveling his dark gaze on me.
“Too late,” I whisper. “I’m not ready to be a mom.” My voice goes high with fright. “I may not know what I want to do with the rest of my life, but I do know I’m not ready for a baby. Poor Prue would probably starve to death without you.” I wave a hand at him before burying my face in my hands. A sob racks my body. “Xander, I’m scared.” I look up at him as a tear slides down my cheek.
He reaches out and swipes it away so fast that I’m not even sure he actually touched me. “Just breathe,” he whispers, taking my chin in his hand and holding me captive. “I’m going to run to the store and get a test. You just … sit here and try not to panic too much.”
A humorless laugh bubbles out of my throat. “Easier said than done.”
Xander swipes his car keys off the counter and uses them to point at me. “Don’t do anything stupid.”
Me? Do something stupid?
Never.
“What the fuck?” Xander pauses in the doorway, and I can feel his gaze on me. Prue sits beside me, licking ice cream out of the gallon container that sits on the floor beside me.
Me? I’m sprawled out on the floor in only my bra and underwear. I got so freaked out that I swear my temperature rose and if I didn’t get out of my clothes then I was going to suffocate. So then, after I removed my clothes, I laid down on the cold hardwood floor in the kitchen. It seemed like the best idea in the world at the time, but I realize now from Xander’s perspective I look like I’ve lost my mind. The ice cream drips on my bra and stomach probably don’t help my case, either, but it’s really freaking hard to eat ice cream while you’re sobbing.
“I got hot,” I mumble, spreading out my arms and legs like you would to make a snow angel. I end up bumping my arm against the ice cream carton and it goes sliding across the floor and Prue runs after it, lapping up more of the quickly melting ice cream.
He shakes his head and sets the plastic bag on the counter.
The plastic bag that holds my fate.
“Thank God your brother isn’t here.”
“Eh,” I mumble. “He would’ve just shaken his head at me and left. Rae is the one that would ask questions.”
“Where are they anyway?” he asks. “They’re never here.”
“He said something about going to see her parents yesterday. I think they’re gone for the whole weekend.”
Xander waggles his brows. “A whole weekend just the two of us?”
I hiss at him—like a cat, because I mean seriously? “Buddy, I think we should figure out if I’m pregnant first, because if I am you’re losing your dick. Just sayin’.”
“Buddy?” he mumbles to himself like he can’t figure out why
on Earth I would’ve called him that.
Still lying on the floor, I hold out a hand to him. “Help me up Mr. Betta-Not-Be-My-Baby-Daddy.”
He suppresses a laugh and holds out a hand to me. Growing serious, he asks, “What are you going to do?” He sounds pained. “If it’s positive,” he clarifies.
I sigh. I know what he’s thinking. “I wouldn’t get an abortion,” I tell him. “I don’t think I could do that, but …” I bite my lip. “I’m not ready for a baby, and how could you be, either? A baby’s a big deal and we’re already dealing with the whole uh-oh marriage thing. I don’t want an uh-oh baby too.”
“You don’t think we could do it?” he asks. “Be parents.”
“I’m sure we could.” I shrug, reaching for my shorts that lie on the floor. “But I think we could be better parents down the road. Like … when I’m thirty.”
He chuckles. “So, you promise one day, if this is negative, you’ll have my baby?” He grabs me by the waist and pulls me to him.
“Number one, it better be negative—no if about it—and number two, yes, if we’re still together. I’d like kids one day … far, far, into the future.”
He lowers his head and nips my bottom lip. “Now there you go using the if word.”
I shrug. “Hey, the summer isn’t up yet. You might grow sick of me.”
He chuckles. “I haven’t in the last nineteen years so I think you’re safe.” He winks at me and steps back, grabbing up the plastic bag. “Shall we?”
“We?” I echo. “Last I checked you don’t have to pee on the stick.” I snatch the bag from his hand and head for the bathroom.
He follows, of course.
I try to push him out of the bathroom but he’s too big. “Ugh,” I groan. “Go away.”
“Nuh-uh.” He shakes his head. “You can’t get rid of me that easily.”
“Obviously,” I mutter, letting my hands fall from his chest. The guy is as solid as a brick wall.
I take the box out of the bag and air whooshes out of my lungs. My hands shake and Xander notices. He doesn’t say anything as he takes the box from my hands and opens it. He reads the directions out loud and hands me the slender white stick.
When Stars Collide (Light in the Dark #2) Page 8
