You know that feeling you get before something bad is about to happen? The one where the air around you goes still and your whole body grows cold? Well, I feel that right now times ten.
The door swings open. “Thea, have you seen—” Cade doesn’t finish his question as he finds Thea and me in bed together. We could try to play this off innocently, like I fell asleep in here watching the show—which is true—but the way we’re tangled together hardly appears innocent.
Thea sits up, panic all over her face. “Cade—”
Cade clenches his jaw, his blue eyes filled with a fiery rage that’s directed smack dab at me. “She’s my little sister!” he yells, shaking his head rapidly back and forth. “How could you do this? I told you to never go there and you fucking promised.”
His breathing grows rapid and the vein in his forehead looks like it’s about to pop. He looks like a red version of the Hulk with the color he’s turning.
He looks torn between running the other way and sacking me on the floor. I’m prepared for either option.
“My sister,” he repeats. “I can’t fucking believe you.” His hands flex at his sides.
Thea is silent beside me, but I think she’s crying.
I push the covers back and stand. “I love her,” I say, holding my head high.
Cade snorts. “You think you love her?” He shakes his head rapidly back and forth. “You’ve never even had a real girlfriend and you think you love her?”
I grow angry. “Because it’s always been her!” I yell back. “Always,” I add softly, glancing at Thea. She looks back at me with wide, surprised eyes and parted lips.
Cade’s eyes widen in surprise when he hears the truth in my words. He places his hands on his hips and tilts his head to the ceiling, exhaling a heavy breath. When he looks back at us, there’s no mistaking the hurt in his eyes. “So, you guys are together?”
Thea looks at me and I look at her, communicating silently. She slips from the bed and goes to her brother. She looks up at him, clasping her hands together with nervousness. “Actually,” her voice shakes, and I know she’s crying this time, “we’re married.”
It’s like all the air has been sucked from the room. We’re all eerily quiet, waiting for someone else to say something first. Cade shakes his head and says, “What did you say?”
Thea bites her lip, stifling a sob.
I step up behind her, placing my hand on her hip. “We got married in Vegas.”
Cade shoves his fingers through his hair. “I can’t fucking believe this. I need to get out of here.”
Before we can say anything else, he’s pounding down the steps and the door to the garage slams a moment later.
Thea turns her body into mine, sobbing into my chest. Her brother means the world to her, and we were ready to tell him, so having him find out this way isn’t good.
The door to Cade and Rae’s room down the hall opens and she pokes her head out, meeting my gaze over Thea’s head.
“Well, that went well.”
I press my lips together. I don’t have a response, and frankly, I don’t know how to make this right. If I was in Cade’s position, I’d be pissed too. I guess we just have to let things play out. We’ve fought before and we always work everything out in the end, I’m sure this won’t be any different. At least I hope not, because I don’t want to lose my best friend.
I can’t believe that happened.
Hours later I’m still in a state of disbelief. I haven’t spoken more than three words since Cade left and I’m pretty sure Xander thinks I’m in some sort of catatonic state. He keeps giving me really worried looks, but I don’t have the energy to reassure him that I’m okay, because I honestly don’t know if I am.
I’m pissed. Pissed at myself for not manning up—or I guess in this case, womanning up—and telling my brother.
In fact, I sort of feel like some divine entity is mocking me. I finally decide it’s time to tell him, and bam he catches us together. Someone, somewhere, is laughing their ass off at me. The fucker.
I flip the pages of the magazine I’m supposedly reading, but I don’t even have the energy to look at the pictures. Xander sits on the stool opposite me at the bar counter and Rae left a while ago to go look for Cade. I made her promise to text me if she found him, but I don’t even know where my phone is.
Xander sighs and picks up Prue from the floor, sitting her in his lap.
“Thea,” he starts, “talk to me, please. You’re scaring me.”
I flip another page in the magazine.
“Thea,” he says more firmly this time.
I lift my gaze to his. “I don’t want him to hate you,” I whisper. “You’re best friends. I don’t want you to fight over me.”
Xander’s shoulders sag and he lets out a relieved breath. “That’s what you’re worried about?” I nod and he smiles. “We’ll be fine, Thea. Don’t worry about us.”
“He’s really mad.” I frown, flipping another page in the magazine.
“Yeah, and I was really mad when we were six and he broke my Nerf gun. I got over it.”
I snort. “Yeah, well that was a toy and this is … This is big.”
He shrugs. “We’re guys. It’s the same difference to us. Things will be fine in no time, you’ll see. He just has to work through it in his head.”
“I hope you’re right.” I close the magazine and slide it across the counter.
“Maybe we should take Prue for a walk?” he suggests. “We’ve been in the house all day. It might do you some good to get out.”
I sigh. Going for a walk doesn’t sound appealing, but it might help me clear my head so it’s worth a shot. “Sure,” I say.
He lets out a relieved breath. “Good. I’ll get her leash.”
He carries Prue out of the room and I stand, stretching my arms above my head. My legs are stiff from sitting in the same position for too long, so I end up stretching them too.
I meet Xander by the front door and Prue wags her tail happily. We head out and down the street, not saying anything for aways, so I’m startled when Xander finally does speak.
“If I give you your ring back, will you wear it?”
I’d been looking at the ground, but my head shoots up at this. He appears nervous and looks away from me, letting the shaggy strands of his hair hide his face from me.
I swallow thickly. There are still lots of people who don’t know about this, but I suddenly don’t care.
After a lengthy pause, that I’m sure makes him sweat bullets, I say, “I’d love to wear it.”
He twists his head my way so quickly I’m surprised he doesn’t get whiplash. “Really?” He smiles like a sheepish little boy.
I nod. “Yeah.” I smile.
“Seeing a ring on your finger isn’t going to give you hives, is it?” he asks seriously, but his eyes sparkle with laughter.
I toss my head back and laugh. “I think I’ll survive.”
He grins at me and reaches for my hand. He grows quiet again and I think the conversation is done, but then he surprises me yet again. He stops in the middle of the sidewalk and I’m forced to stop too. Prue looks up at us quizzically, wondering why we’ve stopped, but she promptly shakes her head and starts smelling the ground.
“I wasn’t lying,” Xander begins, swallowing thickly, “when I told Cade that I love you—but I’m really sorry that’s how you heard it. I should’ve told you first.” He lets go of my hand and glides the backs of his fingers over my cheek before tucking a piece of hair behind my ear. “I love you,” he says again, more firmly this time. “I always have, and I always will.”
My heart pitter-patters in my chest. When your dream guy says he loves you it feels pretty damn good. “I love you too,” I whisper and my chin quivers. It’s stupid to cry over this, but the love I feel for him honestly scares me. It’s intense and all-consuming. The kind of love that has the power to destroy you if things go wrong.
He grasps my chin. “Why are you crying?
”
I breathe out. “Because I’m scared.”
“Don’t be.” He presses his lips to mine softly. It’s just a simple meeting of lips but it feels like so much more. It feels like the final seal on a deal we didn’t have the right to make.
He steps back and calls to Prue who has run as far as her leash will let her.
We start walking again and then circle back to the house.
Rae and Cade’s cars are both back in the driveway and I stop. Fear holds me prisoner but it’s stupid to be afraid of my own big brother. He’s always been my protector. He won’t hurt me.
I turn to Xander. “Would you mind walking Prue some more? I want to talk to Cade.”
He nods. “Sure thing. I need to run to the store so I’ll do that instead.”
“Thanks.” I smile and stand on my tiptoes to kiss his cheek before dashing in the house.
The house is eerily quiet when I step inside and search around, looking for the two of them. I come across Rae first, sitting in their bedroom fiddling with her camera.
I knock on the open door and she looks up. “Where’s Cade?”
“He’s out back.”
“How was he when you found him?”
She frowns. “In one word?” I nod. “Sad.”
My heart breaks and I duck my head, nodding. “I’m going to go talk to him.”
I quickly turn away and head downstairs. I open the back door and step out onto the small deck. It boasts a grill and a small table with two chairs. Cade sits in one, a beer bottle dangling loosely from his fingers and he sits, watching the sunset over the trees.
He hears the door open and his shoulders flex, but he doesn’t turn to look.
I tiptoe across the small space and pull out the chair across from him. He lifts his eyes to mine and I wave awkwardly. “Hi.” I bite my lip. I have no idea what to say.
“Hey,” he says gruffly, looking away.
My fingers wring together. This is my chance to speak to him. To pour my heart out and get him to understand. “I’m sorry,” I say after a long moment. “I’m sorry for not telling you about Xander and me, but I’m not going to apologize for how I feel about him.” His head flicks up at this. “I think you’ve known for a long time that we’ve had feelings for each other and it’s why you warned him from me, but that wasn’t your place.” He opens his mouth to speak. “I know you’re my brother and you’re only trying to protect me, but Cade,” my voice cracks on his name, “you were only hurting us.” He looks away and shame flickers across his face. “Xander’s a good guy. A great guy, actually. Why wouldn’t you want us to be together?”
He sighs. “Xander’s like family. I guess I always thought if you guys dated and broke up, I’d be forced to pick sides, and I don’t want to do that.”
I give him a reassuring smile. “I get that, but now we’re both adults who can make our own decisions. If it doesn’t work out, those are our consequences to deal with, not yours.”
Cade sips his beer and sets the bottle down on the table. “Yeah, I see that now.” He sighs heavily and then chuckles, but there’s no humor in the tone. “I’m still fucking pissed, though.” I open my mouth to protest and he holds up a hand for me to wait. “At myself and Xander. At myself, because I made you guys feel like you couldn’t tell me, and at Xander because he’s my best fucking friend and he didn’t tell me first. Tiptoeing behind my back in my house …” He pauses and shakes his head. “That’s fucking low.”
I flinch. “I’m the one that made him keep it a secret.”
He shakes his head again. “Regardless, he should’ve told me. But again, I realize that’s my fault.” He sighs and scrubs his hands over his face. “It all comes back to me, but I just need time, Thea. I need time to wrap my head around this. Okay?” His blue eyes meet mine, pleading for me to understand.
I nod. “Time,” I repeat. “Okay.” I stand, hoping he’s going to say more, but instead, his gaze returns to the setting sun and I know that I’ve been dismissed.
I sigh and head inside the house. Xander’s not back yet and Rae’s still in her room, so I set about making dinner for the four of us. I keep it simple, opting for spaghetti and garlic bread. Hopefully, there won’t be any food throwing because it could get messy quick.
Xander comes back just as I’m finishing up and Prue bounds into the house and over to me. She licks my leg and then runs over to her cushion and lies down. Xander smiles when he sees me by the stove and kisses my cheek as he passes.
“I brought you a McFlurry.” He holds up the cup and heads to the freezer.
I laugh. “Tonight is definitely ice cream worthy.”
He frowns as he closes the refrigerator door. “Did it not go well?”
I sigh and glance toward the deck door. “It went okay, I guess. I think he’s more mad at us keeping it a secret than actually being together.” I shrug. “I think he realizes that his actions were wrong, but ours were too.” My voice grows soft. “It sucks. I don’t want him mad at us—at you. If he should be mad at anyone, it should be me, but it seems like he’s placing all the blame on your shoulders.”
Xander smiles but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. “You’re his little sister, so it’s easier for him to be mad at me than you.” He shrugs like it’s not a big deal, but it is. He comes over to me and wraps his arms around me. “It’ll be okay. Just give it time.”
I laugh, the sound muffled against his massive chest. “That’s what Cade said. That he needs time.”
Xander steps back, leaning his hip against the counter. “See, we’re all on the same page.” He rubs his hand over his stubbled jaw then and I wait for him to speak. “We’re having dinner with my family this Friday,” he tells me. “Cade and Rae need to come too.”
“Oooh, is this the big reveal?” I wag my brows.
He chuckles. “Yeah, I guess so. I want to tell my parents about us too, if that’s okay?”
I bite my lip, hating that I hesitate for even a second, but I still have doubts about this actually working. Right now, it’s new and exciting and that makes things seem perfect, but what about when summer ends and the real world begins? I’m going to have to go back to school—and I still have no idea what I actually want to major in, so yay me-and Xander’s going to be playing for the NFL. His practices are going to get longer and more intense and he’s going to be gone. Throw in media attention on his end and it’s a recipe for disaster.
I swallow thickly and nod. “Yeah, we can tell them.” I don’t know if that’s the right decision, but after keeping it a secret from Cade and having that blow up in our faces, I feel like we have no choice.
Xander smiles. “Great. You know my mom’s going to be thrilled.”
I laugh. “Your mom’s the best.” And she is. She’s always been like a second mom to me.
I hear footsteps behind us and I turn to see Rae. “I smell food and I’m starving.”
“It’s almost ready. Why don’t you grab Cade and we can all sit down and eat together?”
Rae nods and heads out back.
I look up at Xander. “Showtime.”
We set about placing the plates and everything on the table and we’re almost done when Rae and Cade come inside and sit down. I end up across from Cade with Xander beside me.
We all shovel spaghetti noodles onto our plate in silence. It’s weird. I’m used to someone always saying something and not this eerie quiet.
After a few minutes I ask, “So, Rae, photograph anything interesting lately?” It’s possibly the worst question I’ve ever asked, but I don’t know what to do to break this awkward tension.
Rae bites her lip to hide her laughter but answers anyway. “Nova’s been teaching me how to do more conceptual photos like she does. It’s not really my favorite thing to do, but it’s interesting and a skill I need to work on.
I nod. I don’t understand a word she said. It all sounded like gibberish to me.
More minutes pass and I say, “I think I might join a gy
m.” I loathe exercise, but Rae runs every morning, and Cade usually joins her, and Xander always goes to the gym, so maybe I’m missing out on something.
Xander snorts. “I bet you’ll go once and never go again.”
I narrow my eyes on him. “Challenge accepted.”
He grins back. “We’ll go tomorrow.”
My stomach sinks and I give a half-hearted, “Yippee.”
Xander leans over and presses his lips to the side of my forehead. “Don’t dread it too much. I’ll be there.”
I grin. “Mmm, you shirtless and sweaty. That sounds promising.”
A clatter sends me looking in the other direction. Cade’s pushed his plate away and shoved away from the table. He doesn’t say anything as he stalks out of the room. Rae gives us an apologetic look and shrugs her shoulders.
“He’ll get over it.”
I sigh. I really hope she’s right.
I lost the bet. Thea made it to the gym for a second day, but I’m pretty sure she’s miserable and questioning her life choices.
“This. Is. Too. Fast,” she pants, trying to keep up with the treadmill.
I glance at the number. “You’re only going four miles an hour. I think you’ll survive.”
“Fuck. You.” She gives me the middle finger.
I chuckle and cross my fingers over my chest. I’ve already finished my workout and came over here to cheer—okay, taunt—her on.
“If it’s any consolation, your ass looks great in those shorts.” I bend my head, getting a great look at said ass.
“I’m. Going. To. Punch. You. In. The. Face.”
I chuckle. “Just think about all the McFlurrys you can eat now.”
“Fuck. You. And. Fuck. McFlurrys.” She’s growing even shorter of breath now.
“I’m pretty sure you already said that.” I lean against the rail of the empty treadmill beside her. “Five more minutes.”
“I’m. Going. To. Die.”
“You’re not going to die.” I shake my head. “I kind of like you, so it’s insulting that you think I’d let you die,” I joke. I’m pretty sure she growls but it might’ve just been her trying to breathe. Who knows? “Have you talked to Cade about dinner yet?” It’s Friday night and we’re supposed to be going over to my parents’ house for dinner.
When Stars Collide (Light in the Dark #2) Page 13
