“Was it something I said?” He quirked an eyebrow.
Flora looked to the floor, hiding another smile.
“You look ravishing this evening.” He itched to pull her close, fit her body against his.
“Thank you,” she responded, still not meeting his eye. A few sailors entered carrying trays, along with the captain’s valet. She moved away to accommodate the food but he got the distinct impression she was moving away from him too. She was likely still angry at his rejection. Regret stabbed at his chest.
The rest of the meal passed easily enough with Loudoun gone, but Flora went out of her way to avoid talking to him. By the end of the meal he wanted to burst from annoyance.
As they rose to say their goodbyes, he stepped up to her elbow. “We need to speak.” He’d meant what he said, he’d didn’t want a casual affair nor did he desire marriage, but he just couldn’t set her aside. Some force pulled them together.
Shaking her head, she still didn’t meet his eye. “I disagree. I think you were perfectly clear last night.”
SHE PULLED her arm easily out of his grasp. While she wasn’t sure what he wanted for himself, he’d been perfectly clear he didn’t want anything from her.
Besides, she was a business woman. And chasing your prey was the surest way to scare them off. She knew how to catch what she wanted. “Flora,” he growled close to her ear. “Try to understand.”
“I understand, perfectly,” she replied. Her mother and Captain Andrews walked through the door so she followed. “I believe it is you who doesn’t.” She turned to him then. “If you do not wish to court me, nor do you wish for…” She paused looking for an acceptable term. Finding none, she simply said, “Anything else. Then there is no reason for us to discuss our relationship as you just implied.”
“I care for you. And your mother, for that matter.” His arms crossed his chest and he stopped walking. “I wish to see you safely delivered back to London.”
“And I appreciate your efforts greatly.” Caring was not nearly enough, she realized. Not at all what she wanted. She stopped too, turning towards him with raised eyebrows. “Are we done now?”
Tom swore, “Dammit all to hell.” His expression black.
She gave him a polite smile but it was the first time she’d really looked at him all evening. His dark good looks stole her breath and she averted her eyes again. She would not be distracted now. Turning forward again, she saw Captain Andrews hand her mother up the hatch and realized they were going to take a stroll on the deck.
Blast, she was hoping to return to her room. Perhaps she could make her excuses? She was winning this exchange but Tom could take the upper hand at any point. All she had to do was look at him and all plans evaporated.
“I fear I’ve a headache--” she started.
But she couldn’t finish because his lips captured hers as he pulled her against him and then all thought was gone. He ravaged her mouth and plundered her senses in a most delicious way. It was what she had wanted last night. The rough feel of their bodies pressing together, his arms locked around her, the passionate melding of their lips. But he had denied her.
That thought brought her to her senses. She ripped herself out of his arms. The raw passion on his face was nearly her undoing. Fighting the urge to throw herself back into his arms, beg him to take her somewhere private, she smoothed her dress. Because suddenly, his kisses and caring weren’t nearly enough. She wanted his heart. Clearing her throat, she whispered, “Good night.”
Fleeing down the hall, she went as fast as her feet could carry her until she reached her room. Then she slipped inside and closing the door, turned the lock.
Her breathing was shallow and she leaned against the back of it to try and catch her breath, her hands covering her face. It took a moment to register that a candle already burned in her room. Did Mary light it for her?
“What’s wrong, darling?” Loudoun’s voice called from the shadows.
She stilled for a second, trying to decide what to do. What was he doing here? While Tom’s kiss had set her on fire, Loudoun’s presence turned her to ice. “I’ve a headache. I left early to lie down.”
He stepped out of the shadows, stumbling slightly. Worse than Loudoun being here was a drunk Loudoun in her room, unchaperoned. “You poor thing. Why don’t you lie down and I’ll get a compress.” His voice slurred.
Taking a deep breath, she tried to remain calm. He crossed the room, and reaching her side, his hand came to her neck, fingers trailing down the skin. “You’ve always been beautiful. So soft.”
The niggling fear turned into a full-scale panic and it took all her effort to not shrink away. But she had to outthink him. It was the only way. “And you’ve always been very handsome.”
He chuckled then, his scotch-soaked breath blowing in her face. “Yes, we make a most excellent pair in that regard. Once you stop trying to control everything, we’ll get on quite well.”
Revulsion shivered down her spine. “Mmm.” She held her breath to not have to smell his. Had he forgotten she wasn’t travelling with him? That she’d ended the courtship? “I could use your help now. A cup of tea would do wonders to relieve this pounding in my head.”
He blinked, slowly, in confusion. “Tea?”
“Yes, darling.” She forced herself to put her hand on his arm. “Would you mind?”
He grimaced. But slowly he nodded his head. She turned and unlocked the door. She would either bolt down the hall or, if he stepped out, slam it closed and lock it again. Every sense tingled as she slipped the door open. Loudoun backed up to allow her room and she thought he might just walk out the door.
But his hand suddenly snaked around her upper arm, a gesture she was growing tired of. “I think you should come with me to--”
But his words were cut short by a fist, travelling through the open door and landing directly on his perfectly straight nose.
Blood instantly spurted from his nostrils as he dropped to the ground like a stone.
“Oh,” she cried.
Tom stepped through the door, pushing Loudoun’s body out of the way. “Is this why you ran off? I wouldn’t meet with you last night so you’re here with Loudoun tonight.”
By way of answer, she slapped his face with everything she had. Her hand stung terribly and the sound reverberated through the room. “I hate you.”
“I’m not terribly fond of you either.” His hand came up to his cheek. Even in the dim light, she could see the flesh reddening. It made her feel better.
“Get out of here, and please, take that useless sack of--” She stopped, realizing she had been about to curse. “Take Lord Loudoun with you. I hope to never see either of you ever again.”
Tom stared at her, saying nothing for so long she turned away and crossed her arms over her chest.
Taking a deep breath, she fought back the tears that threatened to fall.
11
Jealousy had been his overriding emotion. But as he watched her curl into herself trembling he took a breath. She hadn’t looked this frightened in the water or during the mutiny. He reached out and pulled her into his embrace. And that’s when he heard it, the catch of her breath, shaky and uncertain. Leaning her head onto his chest, the sobs started, wracking her body.
Bloody fool. Flora was feisty but she knew her mind. Once she had decided against Loudoun, she wouldn’t change it. He’d allowed his own insecurities to take hold and draw stupid conclusions based on his jealousy. In the process he’d completely misread the situation.
“He was in here when you arrived, wasn’t he?” He held her closer.
“I didn’t know what to do.” Her body shook harder.
He picked her up and, taking two strides across the room, gently set her on the bed. “I’ll be right back.”
Then he grabbed Loudoun by the boots and dragged him out of the room.
Once in the hall, he deposited Loudoun against the wall just under the hatch. Blood still gushed out of his nose, unchecked
. Someone would find him soon enough and assume he fell from the deck. With any luck, he would be too intoxicated to deny it.
He sprinted back towards Flora’s room. A niggle of worry that she’d locked him out pushed him faster but her door was open, exactly as he’d left it, and she was curled on the bed. He firmly closed the door and then clicked the lock.
Crossing over to her, he lifted her up and settled her in his lap.
“I never want to be on a ship again,” she murmured even as she buried her face into his neck.
He laughed, though she hadn’t meant it as a joke. But all at once, he was wondering how he was going to live without the sea because he couldn’t live without her. “Can’t say that I blame you.” He kissed the top of her head.
“I suppose it is funny. In an absurd kind of way.” She snuggled closer.
“Just a bit,” he answered, his hand stroking down her back. “Your offer last night. To explore our relationship. Does it still stand?”
Her head shot up, her eyes searching his.
“I don’t mean tonight. I mean in the future.”
“Yes,” she answered quietly.
“What does it entail exactly?” He trailed a finger softly from the back of her neck to the side and then swooped up to trace her ear.
“I’m not entirely certain.” She frowned, a look of concentration knitting her brow. “I want to kiss you again. And I want to know more about who you are. I’d say, not unlike--” She paused biting her lip. “Not unlike courting.”
But not courting. He’d known this. She didn’t consider him a suitable husband. It made his gut clench but he ignored it. It was his destiny to be the second, never the first. Being titled, and having no father to answer to, she could afford to explore before marrying. Husbands would be more forgiving considering what they stood to gain from the match. He’d be in her life until she grew tired of him. He had to accept that. “I see.”
She stiffened, her hands clasping his shoulders. “If that is acceptable to you. I don’t mean to pressure you--”
He silenced her words with a kiss. That was all he would do tonight, kiss her. But he planned to stay. She’d had a traumatic few days and he’d be here to make her feel safe.
A knock at the door had him lifting his head. “Flora. Are you in there?” Lady Segrave called.
“Yes, Mother,” she called back.
“Is everything all right? I turned and you weren’t there. And Lord Loudoun, he seems to have fallen and--”
“I’m fine, Mother. Just tired. I’m…” She paused looking at him, a blush staining her cheeks. “I’m already in bed.”
“All right, dear. I’ll see you in the morning.”
He heard her sigh with relief. Giving her a squeeze, he whispered, “Let me help you change.”
“What?” she squeaked.
Tom kissed her head again. Whatever else he could say, she was no practiced hand at this. Her concern was virginal. “I’ve seen it all before.”
“Yes, but that was different. I was too cold to know and--” She took a deep breath. “I’m not ready just yet.”
He kissed her cheek, her nose, her forehead. “I can leave if you’d like but I thought you’d feel safer if I stayed.”
“I would,” she nodded. Taking a breath, she smiled. “Just close your eyes.”
With a smile, he did as he was commanded. Immediately, she rose and he heard the rustling of fabric as she undid her buttons and stays. She huffed a breath no less than three times as she attempted to do the task herself. “Are you sure you don’t want help?”
“No!” she quickly answered. Finally, he felt the mattress dip and the ropes squeak as she climbed onto the bunk.
Standing up, he stripped his vest and shirt then pulled off his boots. When he turned back towards the bed, she had wiggled under the covers till her eyes were just peeking at him, wide as saucers. Definitely a virgin.
“Flora,” he groaned softly. What did she want if not marriage? Because this was not how most affairs went. He’d had his share and he knew when a woman wanted something casual.
“It’s all right if you don’t want to stay.” She sat up pulling the covers with her. “I know I’m asking a great deal, sleeping here without, with not…” She trailed off.
“Sweetheart, I’ll take whatever you’re willing to give. Now push over and make room.” She scooted towards the wall and he slipped into bed next to her, fitting her soft curves against the hardness of his body.
SHE SHIVERED AT THE SENSATION, despite the heat of his body. The length of him warmed her in the most delicious way. Heating her beyond comfort and towards a blaze of passion. She knew this was a mistake. He didn’t want marriage, he’d said it himself just last night.
She’d be ruined if she allowed this to continue. But perhaps that wasn’t so bad. As a fallen woman she could simply run her estate, live her life. Perhaps have the occasional affair. Her cheeks heated at such brazen thoughts. A lady shouldn’t.
But then again a lady wasn’t supposed to run her own estate. What did society understand, really? She knew she was more valuable than just an ornament on some man’s arm. But that was a decision best left for another day. Today it was amazingly wonderful to be held against him warm, safe, and deliciously exciting.
And that left her to wonder if she shouldn’t seek marriage after all. Though she couldn’t picture being in any arms other than Tom’s. He’d said that he would take whatever she was willing to give. What if she wanted to give all of it? She liked being here, safely encapsulated in his embrace.
Her thoughts tried to continue swirling about but before she knew it, it was harder to think and her body grew heavy. As she drifted to sleep, his warm breath tickled her ear. “Heaven,” she murmured.
“Then perhaps you should stay here always.” His soft breath whispered over her ear.
Did he just speak those words or had she dreamed it? She’d ask in the morning. Now, she wanted nothing more than to sleep.
12
Her hair was like silk through his fingers as he idly played with the end of her braid. He’d slept for a short while but didn’t want to miss any more of this time with her than was necessary.
Tom tried to think back to a time when he’d enjoyed just looking at a woman so much. Holding her in his arms. Christ, they hadn’t even been intimate. But a shift was happening nonetheless. It was less lust and more of some other emotion. Deeper.
He wanted to keep her safe, warm, close.
The certainty this would end badly kept creeping in but, determined to ignore it, he pushed it back. Three days ago he’d been certain he would never marry. Now? He’d give it all to stay with her forever. But he was willing to take whatever she gave and not ask for more.
A knock sounded at the door. Loud and insistent. His first thought was annoyance. She was sleeping so peacefully, if whoever was at the door didn’t stop knocking, they would surely wake her.
It came again. “You’d better open up, Tom,” Captain Andrews called.
Bloody hell and damnation. He ground his teeth together. “Flora,” he whispered. “Wake up.”
She jerked, her unfocused eyes staring blankly into his. She blinked a few times as the confusion cleared. A knock came again. “Open the door.”
“What?” she asked, clearly still half asleep.
He stepped out of bed, grabbed her dressing gown from the back of the door, and pulled her up. Then he draped it over her shoulders. There was little space for him to hide, so he’d have to settle for behind the door.
“Open it,” he mouthed, pressing against the wall.
She unlatched it, then twisted the knob. With a yawn, she opened it just enough to peek out. “What’s the matter?” she asked, yawning again. “Is it another storm?”
Tom bit back a grin. Clever girl.
“No, my lady. We’re looking for the first mate. Is he here?”
“No, Captain,” she replied.
“Then you won’t mind if we take a l
ook in your room?” Tom saw his fingers curl around the edge of the door, as though he were about to push it open.
“I’m afraid I can’t allow that,” Flora answered evenly. “No lady would allow such a thing in her private quarters. It simply isn’t done.”
Tom heard the captain’s intake of breath and the mumbled apology that followed. A sigh of relief was about to escape his lips when he heard Peter’s voice. “But you let him in here the other night. I saw him leave.”
Flora blinked twice. For a moment, he was certain she would cave. “You mean the night I fell into the water?” She paused for no more than a second. “I have no recollection. You’ll have to speak with my mother. Any visitors were her doing. Now if you’ll excuse me, gentlemen, it’s late and I require rest.”
“Of course,” the captain replied. “If you should see Mr. Maddox, please tell him that I am in need of his services.”
She gave a nod.
“Also, poor Lord Loudoun has fallen, it would seem. We’ll keep a guard in the hall, just in case.” It was a flimsy excuse at best to guard Flora’s room. He was certain they were trying to catch Tom leaving and it didn’t seem possible that Flora would be able to talk her way out of this mess. While he wanted her hand, he wanted her to give it. Not be forced into it.
“Oh dear, poor Lord Loudoun. I will check on him first thing in the morning.” She smiled. “Your offer for a guard is most gracious but with all the men in the brig, you must be short-staffed already. Don’t post one on my account. I’ll lock my door and be perfectly safe.”
Tom shook his head in admiration. She must be a shrewd negotiator. He couldn’t wait to see her in action. She was blocking the captain at every turn.
“That is kind of you, my lady,” he answered. “Perhaps we can discuss this in the morning?”
“Of course. Good night.” She closed the door and clicked the lock, the room descending into darkness again.
But voices filtered in from the hall.
“Do you think he’s in there?” Peter’s peppy voice bounced off the walls.
Taming a Savage Gentleman: Taming the Heart Series Page 8
