by Lisa Lace
I pushed my hair off my forehead. It was a nervous gesture I thought I had overcome a long time ago, but couldn’t seem to help in front of Vanessa. What did I want, other than her? Hadn’t I come here for a reason? I searched my addled brain.
We were going to do research.
“Can I come inside?�
She frowned.
“Please, Vanessa. I won’t take long.�
My tone of voice must have softened her stance. She stepped back, pulling the edges of her kimono closed and walking into the living room. She didn’t look behind her to see if I was following. She knew I would. At one time, I would have followed her anywhere.
But those days were long gone. Vanessa had hurt me when she chose her work over me. I wasn’t going to have my heart broken again. I was finished with women. They always left anyway.
Vanessa sat daintily on her couch, crossing her slim legs. I swallowed, pulling my gaze away from her incredible body. As I worked up the courage, we heard a knock at the door. I glanced at her.
“Are you expecting company?�
“A friend said he might drop by tonight.� Her cheeks were burning.
A deep voice called through the door. “Food’s here. Are you ready to eat?�
I lifted my eyebrows. “Were you going to accept a catered dinner wearing nothing but underwear?�
“Shut up, Avren!� Vanessa glared at me, whispering so the delivery man wouldn’t hear our conversation. “You’ve always been self-righteous. When Jak’s in town, he comes over to have some fun. We pretend he has different jobs. Tonight we were going to eat afterward.� She paused. “I don’t owe you an explanation for my social life.�
Was she fucking this guy? I decided not to say anything. What Vanessa did with her life was none of my business. Still, I didn’t want to think about other people touching her.
“Vanessa?� The knocking sounded frantic. “Are you in there?�
She looked at me, unsure about what she should do.
If she couldn’t decide, I knew what I wanted. “I came here for a reason, Vanessa. I’m not going to waste your time. I’m going to get rid of Jak.�
Her eyes flickered with surprise for a moment, and she gazed at me in consternation. Indecision was all over her face. “I should kick you out, you know.�
I nodded. “But you won’t.� I got up and opened the door.
The tall, well-muscled, and handsome Susohnnan man looked me up and down. “You’re not Vanessa. I’m not into threesomes, sweetheart.�
He wasn’t wearing a shirt, and a cutout in his pants over his outer thigh showed a triangular scar. Before he could do anything, I grabbed the food and closed the door in his face. “Thanks, buddy. Vanessa won’t be needing you tonight.�
Vanessa’s communicator lit up a moment later. It was Jak. She started laughing and typed a message. “I told him something came up, and I won’t be able to meet him tonight. Since he saw you, he’s going to assume we’re together.� Her voice trailed off. “Well, we’re casual, so everything should be okay. Wait, I don’t have to explain myself to you. What do you want, Avren? Tell me and get out of here.�
Even though she had been giggling a second ago, she looked upset, green eyes flashing and cheeks stained a rosy pink. She was lovely.
I needed to be alert and focused. I would have to stop thinking about Vanessa’s sexy body. I had come here so we could change my species.
VANESSA
I forced myself to calm down. I wasn’t sure how I had gone from excited to see Jak for a booty call to flustered and upset in a minute. I couldn’t believe Avren Madellan was sitting in my living room and staring at me with his gray eyes which were as cold as his heart.
“I could use your assistance, Vanessa.�
His stare was completely disconcerting. What was I thinking? He had dumped me and left me feeling miserable when we attended university together. I had decided my career was more important to me than anything else. Seeing Avren after all this time wasn’t going to change my mind no matter how rapidly my traitorous heart was beating due to his proximity.
I squeezed my thighs together, trying to ignore how handsome he was. Avren always had a pensive look on his face. He wore a gray, loose-fitting shirt with three buttons. The sleeves were rolled up to his elbow, giving me a glimpse of Avren’s powerful forearms.
I wondered for a moment what he looked like under the shirt. Would he be pudgy and a little soft, like most other academics I worked with? I doubted it.
My thoughts were headed in the wrong direction. No matter what Avren’s chest looked like, I needed to keep myself focused. It didn’t matter what he was going to ask me to do. I would have to say no. It wasn’t safe for me to be around him. I was already a wreck after five minutes in his presence.
“Avren, I’m sorry you came all this way for nothing, but I think you’re talking to the wrong person.�
He held up a hand. “Listen to what I have to say before you make any decisions.�
I pressed my lips together. I saw Avren’s gaze drift to my mouth and I thought I saw the cold gray of his eyes heat up, making a spark of energy that spread out from my core.
“Okay. I’ll hear you out.� I leaned back and nodded.
He gave a sharp nod of his head. “You remember people from my planet can fly, right?�
“It would be hard to forget something like that, Avren. Isn’t it supposed to be a big secret, too? Are you allowed to talk about your wings out in the open like this?� He must have taken me flying at least a dozen times in the few months we had been together. For a landbound Earth girl, the experience was unforgettable.
Avren looked sheepish. “Yes, of course you remember.�
I pointed at my head. “I’m not stupid, okay? I would have to be an idiot to forget you.� Maybe I should stop speaking now while I was ahead. Otherwise, I was going to give away all my secrets within minutes of seeing him. I remembered every detail about the time I spent with Avren Madellan.
I glanced back at him quickly. From his expression, I thought he probably understood what I’d refrained from saying. I had loved him wildly and with abandon. Our flights together had been some of the best times of my life.
If my memories had stopped there, the reminiscence would have been perfect. But they never stopped after the good stuff. Avren had hurt me more than anyone else in my life, and I was never going to let someone have a position of power over me like that again. It would only end badly.
“I didn’t show you everything. We have a problem with flying. Deploying our wings always involves a period of agonizing pain.�
“You shouldn’t have kept this from me.� I forgot everything about the past and started imagining ways to fix the problem. Suffering, particularly genetic discomfort, was one of my specialties.
I saw Avren recognize my lust for knowledge. I hadn’t changed much since university.
“It’s not pretty. But I can show you sometime if you think you would learn something.�
I shuddered. I didn’t think I wanted to see Avren hurting. When I had to observe subjects for my studies, I could put my emotions in check, but I didn’t want to see people I know suffering.
“I’m here because I have an idea, and I need your help.� He leaned forward, putting his elbows on his knees. I felt drawn into his excitement despite the warnings my heart was shouting to my brain.
“You’re going to have to do better than that, Madellan.�
“Vanessa, what if we altered the gene causing the agony for m
y people?�
“That would be good?� Avren wanted my help for genetic research. He was here for my mind. I felt my attitude toward him shifting. His face lit up when he saw the expression on my face.
“Hang on. I haven’t said I would help you yet.� I felt irritated Avren could read me so well. His face broke into a handsome grin.
“Of course not. But you will.� Avren kept talking. I tried to focus on the details and not on how sexy he appeared when he was talking about science. When he finished, he waited nervously for my opinion.
“From what you’ve told me, it sounds possible. We can make many changes today that were unthinkable just a few years ago, but there’s no way of knowing for sure unless we begin manipulating the genes.� I shrugged, causing my loose kimono to fall open again and expose the cleavage from the push-up bra.
Avren grinned. “I like it when you talk dirty to me, baby.�
The leer on his face practically lit me on fire. I suppressed a shiver of desire and tried to put a disgruntled expression on my face. “That’s not going to happen, Avren. Our relationship is going to be strictly professional.�
His face calmed down immediately. “Of course. I wouldn’t want anything else.�
“I’m sorry, but I don’t think I can help you. Perhaps it would be best if you could find someone else. What about Rogerson, over on Marka? He does good work.� I was already starting to regret my decision, but I couldn’t help it. I had plans for the future, and they didn’t involve the man standing in front of me.
“I didn’t think you were going to do this to me.� Avren’s face fell. “Do you have something better to do?�
“I’m going to start a new job soon. I’m hoping to get an offer from Genetic Futures.�
“Are you kidding me? You’ve always wanted to work there.� He looked shocked.
I nodded slowly. He knew. Ever since I was an undergrad, I had always dreamed of working for Genetic Futures. They had the perfect opening — head of research. I don’t know if the recruiter was bullshitting me or not, but he said they loved my interview and were waiting to hear from the CEO. I thought it was practically a done deal.
“I’m waiting to hear their final decision, but they would be stupid to pass on me.�
“Of course.�
I could see the disappointment on Avren’s face. I wished I didn’t have to be the one to crush his hopes.
His eyes locked onto mine. “But some things are worth doing even though they don’t come with accolades.�
Avren had never been supportive of my career. I thought a fellow scientist and academic would have encouraged his girlfriend’s dreams, but he had always tried to hold me back. He almost succeeded, but in the end, I stopped him.
He wasn’t going to change my mind. I had wanted to move up for years, and now the perfect job was available for me. I hadn’t even needed to apply.
I gazed at my old flame. Avren was the only man who had held my heart. Regret threatened to overwhelm me. Sadness choked my throat, and I felt tears coming to my eyes. I blinked them back and swallowed hard.
I wouldn’t let Avren Madellan affect me like this again. It wasn’t right, and it wasn’t healthy.
But the longing came back easily and wouldn’t go away. I wanted Avren so much that I had to ball my hands into fists to keep myself from reaching out and touching him.
Nothing good could come from having Avren back in my life. I was on one path, and he was on another. Rogerson would have to be good enough for him.
I ignored the tiny voice inside my head telling me I knew Rogerson couldn’t handle it. I was the best geneticist in the galaxy to tackle complicated, unsolved problems. My expertise in the science of pain management only added to my qualifications.
What was I thinking? Whatever happened to Avren didn’t have anything to do with me. Nothing was going to stop me from taking the new job.
Chapter Two
VANESSA
I was wrong. One thing could stop me from working at Genetic Futures — being rejected at the last minute.
I swiveled back and forth on my legless chair before I realized what I was doing. I held myself still and directed my gaze back at the recruiter while trying to control my rage.
“What do you mean?� I fixed my eyes resolutely on the screen hanging on the wall of my university office. I couldn’t let myself cry. “I thought you said this was a sure thing.�
“I’m sorry, Ms. Dwyer. Some information came in at the last minute that changed the president’s mind.�
“What sort of information are we talking about?�
“I’m not at liberty to disclose that to a non-employee of Genetic Futures.�
I sat back in my chair, and I drew a shaky breath. I couldn’t believe what was happening to me.
“I can tell you this much.� The recruiter lowered his voice. “Despite all my efforts to emphasize your credentials, the president learned your planet of origin.� He shrugged helplessly.
“Are you trying to avoid saying he’s a prejudiced bastard?� Earth was one of the poorest planets in the galaxy. Sometimes I felt like trailer trash, and it pissed me off. Suddenly I remembered with whom I was speaking. I put my hand over my mouth and cringed. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be so unprofessional.�
He appeared to be stifling a smile. “You can say what I cannot. I apologize again, Ms. Dwyer. I had high hopes for you.�
“I did, too.� I terminated the conversation and put my face in my hands. I thought I had done everything right. I had a perfect résumé, the interview had gone perfectly, and they’d loved me. The recruiter said they were talking about me for an hour after we ended the holocall. I was perfect for the job. I couldn’t control where I was born.
I would have to get over it and return to my regular life. My thoughts strayed inadvertently to the surprise visit from Avren last night. I had turned down his exciting project, and then Genetic Futures left me high and dry.
I felt a familiar feeling wash over me. There had been a chance for happiness, and I blew it looking for fame and glory. Was this going to be like the last time I was with Avren?
I sat in my chair, unable to move or get to work. I wondered if I would ever be able to function again.
There was a knock on my door.
AVREN
“Come in.�
Despair filled Vanessa’s voice. I sensed it and became concerned immediately. What could have happened to make her so sad? I threw open the door and burst into her office. She had been holding her head in her hands, but she looked up at me. She wasn’t crying even though she looked like she wanted to. Only one thing could have upset her this much.
She didn’t get the job.
Vanessa’s career meant everything to her. She had chosen a job over love. Work was her way out of poverty and an opportunity to prove she mattered. She was smart. I wondered what had happened.
“Did something happen with Genetic Futures?� I closed the door behind me. Vanessa’s office was alarmingly neat, without a single book or sheet of paper out of place. One wall held nothing but bookshelves. Another contained a window stretching from the floor to the ceiling. A desk sat against the third wall, which displayed her diplomas and other awards. The orderliness of the room had her fingerprints all over it, and it seemed like it should be a cheerful place to work.
When I walked inside, however, it contained a decidedly melancholy air. Clouds covered the sun, and the light had a grayish tinge. Vanessa’s dejected gaze emanated despair.
“How did you know?�
Vanessa looked confused and bewildered. I didn’t sense any of yesterday’s hostility. I assumed she was still in shock, and I was determined to use it to my advantage. If her misfortune could help my people and me, I would take the opportunity. I needed her too much to worry about taking advantage of her weakened state of mind.
My thoughts drifted to Allex’s suffering. He took his wings out every few days. An infection had made his struggles worse than the rest of us. I hadn’t known how bad it was until recently. I had been with Anders, another of my brothers, and Gwen, his fiancée. We were shocked when we saw his suffering. I had never seen anything like it before.
I thought Vanessa and I could fix it together. My memories of Allex’s pain were enough to make me willing to cross a lot of lines.
I shrugged. “It’s the only thing I can imagine that would make you so upset.�
“Do I look flustered or something?� She tilted her head.
I crossed my arms and stared at her.
“Okay, fine. I’m a little shaken.� Vanessa sat up straight to pull herself together. “I still have a good job and a fantastic life. I don’t need Genetic Futures at all.�
“That’s right. Forget about those guys.�
The forlorn look returned and she slumped back in her chair. “Who am I kidding? I’ve wanted to work there as long as I’ve known the company existed, Avren.� Vanessa raised her sorrowful eyes to mine. “Do you know why they didn’t give it to me?�
“No, I don’t. Why?� I had been wondering that myself. They didn’t have any good reasons to pass her up that I knew of.
“Apparently, it’s because I’m from Earth.�
“Are you kidding me? What a bunch of bastards.� My vehemence produced a mirthless chuckle from her. “You’re better off without them, Vanessa. You can see that, can’t you?� I put my hands flat on the desk and leaned toward her to better emphasize my point.
“Yeah, I know. But it doesn’t make me feel any better.�
