by K. J. Dahlen
As the night crawled closer to the early morning, her muscles began to ache. Her shoulders and arms began to tire and after she painted the last little bit, she dropped her paintbrush into the empty can and stood back to view her work.
“Wow girl, you got some talent there.”
The words were spoken softly but they made Cassie jump and spin around.
Reva stood there gazing at what she’d done in awe. “You did all this in a few hours?” she exclaimed.
Cassie nodded as she picked up her empty can and went into the kitchen. Running water, she rinsed out the brush and threw away the can. Coming back into the main room she asked, “Do you think anyone will care that I painted their walls?”
Reva turned her head and grinned. “I think they will love it. You did a great job. I can’t wait until Gator sees this. He’s gonna love it.”
Cassie yawned. “I think I can sleep now. See you later.”
“Yeah, you need to get some rest.” She patted Cassie on the shoulder but Cassie was too tired to care as she made her way down the hall. A few minutes later, she laid down on the bed fully dressed, closed her eyes and fell asleep.
~* * * *~
Deke groaned as he heard dishes slamming in the kitchen. His dreams had been weird. He dreamt of being chased by a huge snarling tiger all night. That and sounds of someone pacing behind him. It was certainly a dream he’d never had before. His bleary eyes focused on the empty bottle of Black Velvet sitting on the table and he vowed never to get that drunk again.
Picking up his head, he winced when someone set down a cup of coffee beside his head. The aroma almost made him want to puke. He had to take several deep breaths before the nausea disappeared. He groaned and sat up. Grabbing the coffee, it took both hands to bring it to his lips this morning. He groaned again, when the first sip slid down his throat.
“How are you feeling?” Reva asked as she sat down with her own cup of coffee.
“Am I still alive?” Deke jokingly asked her. “I had the weirdest dream last night. Something about being chased through the jungle by a huge assed tiger. I could hear the beast snarling at me all night long.
Reva snorted. “Look behind you, boss.”
Deke glared at her but turned his head and simply stared. He slowly got to his feet, never taking his eyes off the beast. The tiger in his dreams had come to life and it was standing about three feet away. He could see its snarl, he could almost hear its mighty roar. “What the fucking hell is that?” he cried out as he backed away from it.
Reva laughed. “It isn’t going to hurt you, you know. She worked on it all night. Isn’t it great?”
Deke’s swiftly beating heart slowed down as he stared at the painting on the wall. The tiger seemed so real it was uncanny. He seemed to be leaping out of the wall straight at him. Then he turned his head and saw the other painting. There on the wall bigger than life was the Satan’s Spawn patch. The colors were bold and bright and it too seemed three dimensional. “Wow, are you telling me that Cassie painted this?”
“Yep, she’s got some kinda talent.” Reva sipped her coffee.
The main door opened and Gator stumbled inside. His head was drooping and he could barely put one foot in front of the other. When he sat down he glanced at his wife and begged her, “Please woman, get me coffee. I need it strong and black this morning.”
Reva got up and fetched a pot. When she sat down, she poured him a cup and set it close to his head. When he raised his head, something caught his eye and he sat up with a start. “What the fuck?” he called out as he stared at the cat staring back at him. His face paled by at least two shades. “Holy hell, that scared the shit out of me for a minute.”
Deke turned his head and grinned. “At least you didn’t have nightmares about it chasing you through the jungle.” He turned back to the cat. “Damn, I can almost hear the bastard roaring.”
“Who painted it?” Gator asked.
“Cassie,” Reva replied. “She was up all night doing it.”
“Wow,” Gator grinned. “Wait till the boys see this. They are gonna seriously freak!”
A loud piercing scream broke the silence a moment later.
Deke, Reva and Gator ran toward the bedroom Cassie was in, not knowing what to expect. They threw the door open and saw her laying on the bed. She was throwing herself this way and that way, struggling against the power of a nightmare.
Deke began to rush toward her when Gator wrapped an arm around his shoulder. “Better call out to her and try to wake her before you touch her. She doesn’t look like she’s in a good place right now.”
Deke nodded as he stared at the pain and agony he saw on her face. Whatever demons she battled in her dreams, they held her close and they were not kind. “Cassie, honey please wake up. It’s only a dream.” He moved closer while Reva and Gator watched from the doorway. “Come on baby, time to wake up now,” he called out a little louder.
His voice must have reached her in her blocked state of mind and she stopped thrashing about. She hadn’t opened her eyes yet, but she acted like she could hear him.
“Come on baby, open your eyes and come back to me.”
Cassie slowly opened her eyes. At first, she didn’t seem to know where she was. Then she turned her head and saw Deke standing there. Her eyes were puffy and her skin was pale. Her nose was runny and blood drained from the corner of her mouth. She leaped at him, wrapping her arms around his neck.
Her tears and sobs wrenched his heart and he could do nothing to help her except hold her. His hands ran up and down her back as he whispered in her ear, “It’s okay baby, it’s just a bad dream.”
~* * * *~
Cassie sobbed like her heart was going to break. She was shaking and her arms were trembling with fear. She could taste blood in her mouth but she didn’t know why. Deke’s arms tightened around her and she didn’t care. Here for just a moment, she felt safe. No one could hurt her as long as he protected her. Then her fears came back. How long would he protect her when he knew the truth? How long would she have a safe haven when he learned all there was to know about her past. She knew he asked Peaches about their past. Peaches would keep her secrets, but could she still be tracked down? Would the police come to arrest her?
Cassie trembled then calmed. She knew she had to find a way to escape again. She couldn’t be caught. She had to be free, not locked away in prison. She could never be locked up again. She wouldn’t survive this time. If they caught her, it would kill her.
She took a deep breath and raised her head. She glanced toward the door and flushed when she saw Reva and Gator standing there.
“Hey.” Deke leaned back. “Are you okay now?”
Cassie nodded and wouldn’t look at him.
“It was just a bad dream, it can’t hurt you,” Deke murmured.
“I know. I’m so sorry I caused this much grief,” Cassie whispered. “I’m so sorry.”
“Hush.” Deke’s arms tightened around her briefly. When he let loose, she buried her head in his chest. “Everyone has bad shit in their past. Most are lucky enough to leave it there and others dream about it.”
“Deke, can I ask you something privately?” she whispered.
Deke looked over at the couple and nodded.
Gator pulled Reva out the door and quietly closed it behind them.
“We’re alone now.”
Laying her head on his chest, she closed her eyes. She didn’t want to see his face when she asked her question. She didn’t want to see the horror in his eyes or the revision. “Did you ever hurt someone who really needed hurting? Someone who used pain to control little kids? Someone so vile, he had no soul?”
Deke tightened his hold. “Yes baby, I’ve hurt someone just like that.”
“Did he die because of it?” she whispered.
~* * * *~
Deked lifted his head. “Is that what you’re so afraid of? That you might have killed somebody who hurt y
ou?”
“I don’t think I killed him, I know I did. There was just no way he could have lived after the way I hurt him.”
Her words were softly whispered, so softly Deke didn’t know if he heard her correctly or not. “Honey, I’m not a very good person. I have killed before and will probably do it again, when the time comes. If it comes.”
Cassie glanced up at him and frowned. “But I didn’t want to kill him. I only wanted to stop him from hurting Peaches.”
“Why don’t you tell me about it?”
“I can’t.” She shook her head. “It’s not only my secret.”
“Sometimes, talking about it helps you cope with the pain. You can’t keep that shit inside, it will eat you up.”
Cassie laid her head back down on his chest. Closing her eyes, she began telling him about her childhood. At first, the words were halted and faltering. Then as she went on, they became clearer. The hell she described as her life was like a living nightmare he could hardly believe, but he knew it was true. She had been the victim from the time she turned three and she had no one to help her. No one but herself. Then she told him about what happened the night Peaches was attacked. She described in vivid detail what she’d done to a teenage rapist. A boy more than a man but still a vile person. The things she described that this young kid had done to a small child made Deke’s blood go cold.
At the age of ten years old, she had saved the life of her best friend by plunging a knife into the body of another human being. A boy four years older than herself and many pounds heavier. She told him every detail she had embedded in her brain. The sight of his blood the smell of the candles he was burning. The taste of his mouth as he tried to kiss her.
Then she showed him her wrists. “Can you still see the rope burns? Mrs. Pierce used to tie me up in the basement for days when she got mad at me.” Her words were barely above a whisper now. Her throat was dry and her voice cracked. “I-I can’t be restrained and put in a dark basement. I couldn’t stand—it. I almost lost my mind being there when I was a kid. I’m afraid of the dark. That’s part of why I don’t like to be touched. When I was in the dark, all tied up, I felt hands grabbing me, they touched me all over. They pinched me and touched me in places no one should touch. I screamed but no one could hear me. Then the laughter came, driving me further into the blackness. When I got loose that night, my wrists were bloody and so sore I couldn’t move them. When I heard Peaches screaming I ran to her. When I saw the pain and fear on her face, I knew I had to help her. I could barely hang on to anything and Robbie laughed at me. He grabbed the back of my neck and pulled me close to him to kiss me and I wanted to puke. I don’t know how I did it but I got the strength to grab a knife and I stabbed him with it. The rage came over me and I kept stabbing him. There was so much blood…”
Deke cradled her head to his chest. “Shhh, it’s okay. Don’t tell me anymore.”
Cassie closed her eyes. “But I killed him. I murdered him and I’m so afraid Mrs. Pierce will find me and haul me back to her basement. I’ll die down there. I’ll die and no one will ever know.”
“Honey, I won’t let anyone hurt you. I’ll kill her first.”
“There was only one time I saw her that she acted halfway decent.”
Deke ran his fingers along Cassie’s back. “Oh, when was that?”
“I guess I was about eight when someone came to the door. I was hiding but I could see her face. When she saw who was there, her face changed. It was as if someone from her past came back and she was happy to see him. I couldn’t see him but I could hear the conversation. She called him Calderone and he called her Janie. It didn’t make sense to me at the time, but she went with him outside and closed the door behind her. I went to the window and watched them for a few minutes, then he got into his car and he left. She came back into the house and I hid again. She was wiping tears away and for a moment, she looked upset. Five minutes later, the hellbent old lady I knew so well was back.”
“Did this Calderone person ever come back?”
Cassie shook her head and she didn’t speak for a few minutes. “Please don’t hate me. I’m really not a bad person.”
Deke leaned back and holding her face, he kissed her. He thrust his tongue inside her mouth and he kissed her deeply and then he breathlessly pulled his mouth from hers. “Oh baby, I don’t hate you. I think I might be falling for you and that scares the hell out of me. I’ve never loved anyone before.”
Cassie threw herself at him. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she kissed him back. “For the first time in my life, I’m not afraid. I know that I’m safe when you hold me. I’m not afraid to let you touch me. I never knew before that a touch could give me this feeling. When you let me kiss you. I’d never known that feeling before. I’m not sure if what I feel for you is love or not, but I want to find out. I think it might be but I’m not sure. I know I don’t feel this way for anyone else. I can’t stand to think someone else could touch me the way you do.”
“No one else will ever touch you the way I do,” Deke whispered. “If that happens I’ll kill the bastard.”
Cassie smiled sadly. “I learned the hard way how to protect myself and Peaches. I learned when someone else hit me, just how much pain I could endure. I learned how to hurt them when they came after me and her…but I hated every minute of it. I just couldn’t let anyone else hurt her or me. I just couldn’t. She was so scared that night. Robbie cut her bad. She was bleeding so bad, we had to hold up for three days until it stopped. I was so scared, we would get caught.”
“I’ve got you now and I won’t let anything or anyone hurt you ever again,” Deke vowed.
CHAPTER FOUR
Connie pressed her ear to the door and waited. She’d been lurking in the background waiting for her chance to finally get the dirt on the new bitch and it had paid off. She’d been looking for payback since the fight between them. Wiley had told her not to drag it out, but Connie just couldn’t let it go. She’d been waiting and watching over the last few days and keeping track of Cassie’s movements. She had to have her revenge. Which is why when she heard that blood curdling scream earlier, then the bitch had been sobbing, crying her poor little eyes out, she hid until the coast was clear and now she was trying to eavesdrop like a little kid.
They were speaking so softly she could barely hear what they had to say. She did hear something about murder though and that made her smile.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Gator roared from behind her.
Connie spun around and was facing a very irate biker.
Gator towered over her on the best of days and this wasn’t one of the good days for sure. He grabbed her by the arm and dragged her back to the main room. His steps were so long she couldn’t keep up. When he stopped in front of Wiley’s table, he tossed her to the floor. “Wiley, you’d better get your bitch under control.” Gator snarled. “Deke would not be happy to know she was listening to a private conversation, especially when the conversation is his. In fact, I can damn well guarantee he ain’t going to like it.”
Wiley got to his feet and stared down at her for a moment.
His face looked blank and Connie knew she wasn’t’ going to like what happened next. Wiley had told her to drop the anger against Cassie. She hadn’t listened and the bitch had beaten her. Wiley told her a second time after the fight to leave it alone and she didn’t listen again.
Wiley had been an all right guy, almost perfect for her needs but lately, she felt him pulling away. Connie loved the fact that she was a biker’s old lady. She’d thought that over time, she could have it all, a ring, a wedding, kids. Wiley had been good to her, maybe even loved her in his own way.
“Wiley, baby…” she began to plead.
Wiley brought his gaze up to Gator. “Toss the bitch out. She ain’t my old lady anymore.”
“Wiley—you can’t mean that?” Connie screamed. “I know you don’t mean it, c-come on baby!”
Gator nodded and with a hand motion, two prospects came forward and each one grabbed one of her arms. They half dragged, half carried her to the main door. Connie was sobbing but no one there lifted a finger to help her.
Wiley got to his feet and followed the men. Just before they opened the door, he called out, “Wait a sec, boys.”
Connie glanced up at him with hope in her eyes. When he reached into her pocket and pulled out her keys, she thought maybe there was something there to save her. Then he turned and walked away, leaving her and she knew it was over.
The prospects walked her all the way out to the front gate. When it opened, they tossed her out. She stumbled and fell to the dirt. They closed the gate behind her and without a word, they walked back to the clubhouse.
Connie lay there in the dirt sobbing. She had just lost everything that ever meant anything to her. She was no longer Wiley’s old lady and without him, she knew she’d never be with anyone from the club again. She’d been with Wiley for two years, she’d taken care of him, lived with him, loved him and now she’d lost him. He’d stripped her of more than just her status when he took her vest. Without her keys, she had no place to go, and no car to drive to get her anywhere.
She quickly checked her back pocket and breathed a sigh of relief. At least, she still had her phone. Knowing she might not have it long, she walked down the road and for the first time in her life, she posted club business on the web. When they had arrived this morning and seen the tiger on the wall of the clubhouse Connie had been stunned.
Everyone had been standing around gazing at the painting. Their remarks had set Connie’s teeth off. She hated that Cassie had shown more talent than she ever had in the few days she’d been with them. Knowing it was against the rules, Connie had sneaked a picture of the tiger. The hard and fast rule was, no one spoke about the club and what went on inside the walls. If you broke that rule, you were as good as dead.
