Fucking Lover Boy himself, in the flesh.
Ever since the night she’d spent at my apartment, I’d resumed following Carrie around sight unseen. Just like she wanted. Yesterday, she’d kept darting glances all around, watching for me. Almost as if she wanted to catch me out of place. I’d made sure to stay out of sight, and she had eventually stopped looking.
I didn’t blame her in the least. If our roles were reversed, I would’ve felt the same way. I wouldn’t want to ever see her again, but that didn’t make it any easier on me. Losing her had only made it all the more evident that I loved her. And all the more evident that I was an idiot too. The two kind of went hand in hand, didn’t they?
Love didn’t come without a little bit of stupidity. Okay. A hell of a lot of it.
The door opened, and Cory came out, his arm thrown around Carrie’s shoulders. I tensed. She didn’t shrug free like she normally did. If anything, she snuggled in closer. I clamped my jaw tight and proceeded to try and come up with at least twenty different ways I could shove Cory’s arm up his own ass. I’d only reached option three when Cory kissed Carrie’s cheek, then went back inside.
Cheek? Fucking pansy…
I’d never like that guy as much as I did right now.
Carrie hugged her books tight to her chest and searched the empty courtyard. I should slink back into the shadows. Hide. But I didn’t want to. Maybe I was in the mood for a fight. Maybe I just wanted to hear her voice as she told me to go away. Either way, I was completely pathetic.
I straightened, waiting to see if she would see me. Equally worried she might not. Her gaze skimmed over me, then slammed back. I stood my ground, waiting to see what she did. How she would react to my blatant disobedience to her request.
Mumbling to herself, she crossed the yard. “Hey. Thank you for taking care of me the other day.”
She said it so fast that I had a hard time keeping up with the torrent of words coming out of her mouth. I cocked a brow. “You’re welcome. Sorry I’m still here. I wasn’t expecting you to come out of his room so soon.” I shrugged and focused on the door behind her. “I figured you might be…ah, busy for a little while. Ya know.”
Her cheeks turned pink. “We weren’t…I didn’t…” She pressed her lips together. “We were studying, not doing that.”
Relief rushed through me, heady and unstoppable. Relief I didn’t have a right to feel. “I figured as much when he kissed you on the cheek. Anyone who has earned the right to kiss you wouldn’t go for your cheek.”
She opened her mouth, then slammed it shut. “Good night, Finn. You can go now.”
I cocked my head. “I’ll leave once you’re inside.”
“I’m not going inside.” She fluttered her hand. “Well, I am, but I’m coming back out. I’m going to a party.”
I stood up straight at that. “What kind of party? And do you really think that’s best after the way you felt a couple nights ago?”
“A frat party, and I’m fine.”
She moved past me, going inside. I should go back into the shadows, but I didn’t like the idea of her going to a party tonight. After the type of night she had the other day, she needed rest and tea. Not dancing and beer.
I paced for what had to have been twenty minutes, my impatience growing with each step I took. She had no place partying tonight. None at all. The door opened behind me and I spun. “You’re not going to that party. If you think I’ll sit there watching—”
I stopped talking, and my jaw dropped. Holy. Fucking. Shit.
I’d seen her in a bikini. I’d seen her surfing. I’d even seen her naked, but I had never seen her like this. She wore a tiny, poor excuse for a dress, a pair of fuck me heels that were meant to be over my shoulders, not on the ground—and wore more makeup than I’d ever seen on her before. Her red lips begged to be kissed, and the rest of her…well, it matched the shoes.
“No.” My jaw ticked. “Go upstairs and put on some real clothes.”
She laughed. “Yeah, not happening.”
“You’re right. It’s not.” When she tried to pass me, I stepped in her way. “I said get dressed.”
She shook her head. “No.”
“Do it.”
“Or what?” She put her hands on her hips. Actually put her hands on her hips and stared me down. “What can someone like you do to hurt me?”
I’d said almost those same exact words to her not long ago. Turns out, someone like her could hurt me too easily by refusing to be with me. By not loving me back. “I’ll kiss you, like you did to teach me a lesson, if you don’t change right now.”
“Please.” She huffed. “I’m not the one who can’t handle a simple kiss.”
Challenge. Accepted.
I hauled her close, making sure to press my body fully against hers. Closing my hands around her ass, I rubbed against her as I fused my mouth to hers, not wasting even a second in ravishing her. Her hands pushed at my shoulders, but then she stopped pushing and started pulling me closer. When her tongue dueled with mine, I barely managed to hold back my shout of satisfaction.
She might keep saying she didn’t want to be around me, but her body obviously did. Thank fucking God. She whimpered into my mouth and lifted her leg, wrapping her calf around mine. I would like nothing more than to keep this going. To take her home with me and show her exactly how much she hated me while I made love to her repeatedly. But I knew as soon as the kiss ended, so would we.
Again.
I pulled back and rested my forehead on hers, wishing that things could be different. “I miss you,” I whispered. “So damn much. Please give me another chance.”
Her fingers tightened on me, and for a second I thought she might pull me closer. For a second, my heart leapt. She pushed me away. “I’m sorry, but I can’t.”
My heart leapt right into a gnarled mess at her words, but I forced myself to let her go. “Fine, but either you change out of that poor excuse for a dress, or I stay by your side all night instead of letting you do your thing undisturbed. Your choice.”
“Why do you give a damn what I do? Just tell Dad I’m in bed. He won’t know.”
I shook my head. “I care because I care about you, Captain Obvious.”
“Stop saying that.”
“No.” I advanced on her. “I care about you, and you telling me to stop isn’t going to work. Get changed, or hang out with me.”
“I’m this close,” she held her fingers close together and shoved them in my face, “to calling my Dad and telling him I know exactly who you are.”
I cocked a brow. “Go ahead.”
Bluff. Called.
She stomped her foot. “What would your dad do without his pension?”
“If he was here, he’d be stopping you from leaving in that too.” I dragged a hand through my hair. “This isn’t you, Carrie. If you have to dress like this to get a guy’s attention, he’s not the right guy for you.”
She held her hands out to her sides. “What would you know about what kind of guy I need?”
My jaw ticked. “I know it’s not whoever you’re wearing this outfit for.”
“Oh?” She paced in front of me. “Let me guess. You’re the type of guy I need?”
“No,” I said honestly. “You deserve much better than me.”
That made her stop pacing, and she looked at me in surprise. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me.” I caught her jaw and tilted her face up to mine. “I’d like to say I deserve you, but the truth is I don’t and never will. You deserve a prince, and you’re not going to catch him wearing that.”
“Finn…” She swayed toward me, her eyes soft. “I wish—”
“Is there a problem here?” Cory asked, his voice tight. He glared at my hand, which was still on Carrie’s jaw.
The little fucker was probably mad I dared to touch her. “Carrie? Are you all right?”
“I’m fine,” Carrie quickly replied. “We were just finishing up here.”
I dropped my hold on Carrie. “There’s not a problem, Cody. Carrie was about to go change.”
“Change?” Cory looked her up and down, and I swore the idiot’s tongue hit the dirt. “She looks great to me.”
“Of course she does,” I muttered.
Carrie shot me an angry look. “Thank you, Cory.”
“This is touching and all,” I said as I crossed my arms and rocked back on my heels. “but what’s your choice?”
“I choose to ignore you and leave with Cory,” she said, tipping her perfect little nose up in the air. “Now, if you’ll excuse us?”
Cory threw an arm over Carrie’s shoulder and shot me a triumphant grin. “See ya later.”
I fell into step beside them. “No need for goodbyes. I’m coming along.”
“No, you’re not.” Carrie stopped walking and shot me down with her sapphire eyes. “Finn. Please. Just go away. You’re going to ruin everything.”
She gave me the look she probably gave her father. The look that made her get away with everything in the world, and then some. The one that begged me to back off, before her cover was blown. If I kept insisting on accompanying her, questions would be asked. She would no longer be just another girl who went to college. She’d be the senator’s daughter—complete with bodyguard.
“You heard her.” Cory pulled Carrie closer to his side, eyeing me cautiously. “Go away. You don’t even go to this school, do you?”
As if she needed protection from me. I was trying to help her, not hurt her.
Wasn’t I?
Or was my jealousy the thing leading me to protest her outfit? Was it really any worse than what every other college girl would be wearing to the party? Maybe I needed to take a step back and stop playing the part of the overprotective boyfriend. I wasn’t hers, and she wasn’t mine. It was none of my business what she did or didn’t wear anymore.
“Fine.” I flexed my fingers. “You know where I’ll be.”
Carrie bit down on her lower lip and glanced away from me. “Thank you.”
I inclined my head, shot a death glare in Cory’s direction, and faded back into the shadows where I belonged.
Seeing Finn earlier had messed me up. Especially when he asked me to give him another chance. God, I wanted to, but I was too scared. Too scared to put myself out there again. Once a liar, always a liar. If he lied to me about his identity, what else would he lie to me about? What else had he already lied about?
I grabbed my fourth drink of the night, tipping it back and drinking deeply. It tasted like crap, but I didn’t care. Not tonight. Seeing him had thrown me off-kilter. I’d been so sure I could get over him. Sure that eventually I wouldn’t miss him or need him or want him. Then he’d had to go and kiss me. That had ruined everything. My body had responded immediately to him, as if it remembered the things he could do with his hands and tongue.
And it wanted more. I wanted more.
Marie came over to me, grinning. “Well, if it isn’t the prodigal roommate. Out drinking like the rest of us college kids.”
“Yeah.” I forced a smile for my roommate. We weren’t friends, but I didn’t hate her. “Crazy, huh?”
“A welcome crazy.” Marie nudged me with her shoulder. “I was starting to think I bunked with Mother Mary or something.”
I rolled my eyes. “Believe me, that’s not the case.”
“Coulda fooled me.” Marie took a long sip of her beer. “Although, I saw you on the beach the other week. Surfing. Who was that fine hottie you had with you? And more importantly, who is he to you?”
I tensed. “Him? No one. Nothing.”
“Can you tell me where to find him? I’d like to be his something.”
If Marie thought I would give her Finn’s info, she was barking up the wrong tree. No one would be getting near him with my help while I still had breath in my lungs. “Sorry, I have no idea. He was just some guy…”
A soft laugh sounded from outside, and I glanced over my shoulder. Of course he’d heard that. I turned around and smiled at Marie. Luckily, she was too distracted to see the falseness behind the gesture. That, or she didn’t care.
“Actually,” I said, leaning closer. “I think he’s gay.”
“Really?” Marie gasped, her cheeks flushed. “Are you sure?”
I nodded, grinning when I heard a few mumbled curses from outside the open window. “Positive. He kept talking about Cory and asking if he was single.”
Marie sighed. “It’s true. All the good ones are gay or taken.”
“Sadly so,” I said, keeping my voice solemn, even though I wanted to cackle with glee. I pointed at a cute guy across the room, who was watching us. “But he looks single and straight.”
Marie licked her lips. “Wish me luck.”
“You don’t need it,” I said, smiling. “But good luck.”
Marie took off, a swing in her step that hadn’t been there a second before, and crossed the room to the guy. Within seconds of Marie leaving my side, Cory arrived. He threw an arm around me, throwing us both off balance. I didn’t know how many drinks he’d had so far, but it had to be a lot.
Too many for him to be trustworthy.
Maybe he needed some fresh air to sober up. I fanned my cheeks again. “I’m hot. Can we go for a walk?”
Cory straightened and let out a hiccup. “Sure. Let’s go.”
He stumbled across the room, looking way too close to passing out, and I followed him. As soon as we stepped out into the night air, I took a deep breath. All of the colognes and booze had mixed into an unpleasant odor inside, and the fresh ocean breeze was a welcome change. I looked out toward the ocean and wrapped my arms around myself, reminded of another night just like this one.
The night I met Finn...
God, I missed him.
I gritted my teeth and turned to Cory, forcing a smile. I wasn’t going to think about Finn anymore tonight. I refused. “It’s been fun tonight.”
“Yeah, I’m glad you came.”
He wrapped his arms around me. It felt nice to be held by him. Secure, even. But I didn’t itch to jump his bones. Didn’t want to climb into his bed and lick him from head to toe. Maybe I was doing something wrong. Or maybe there was something wrong with me. Either way, I was done for the night. I wanted to go home.
I looked up at him, intending to tell him goodbye. I opened my mouth…and he was on me. His lips met mine, and it felt…nice. There might have been the slightest stirrings of desire, but it was so quiet a tiny breeze would have put out the fires. Cory groaned and crushed me against his chest, his tongue sliding in between my lips. I tried to feel something…anything…but it didn’t work. There was nothing there, just like the other time he’d kissed me. Yeah, I was broken.
Why was it that only Finn could make me want him?
Just as I was about to pull back and make my excuses to go home, something crashed behind us. Cory jerked back from me and looked around. I, of course, knew who was out there. How could I have forgotten about Finn following me, for even a second? He’d seen us and probably thought I was moving on. I wasn’t.
Probably never would be.
“Who’s out there?” Cory asked, stalking toward the noise. “Show yourself.”
I grabbed Cory’s elbow, trying to bring him back. I didn’t want them to see each other. “Don’t worry about it. It was no one.”
“Someone’s watching you,” Cory said, his jaw squared. “And I bet I know who it is.”
“No!” I cried, trying to pull him back toward me. “There’s no one out there. Let’s go.”
“I can see him.
” Cory pointed at where he supposedly saw Finn. “Come out here, surfer boy.”
Finn stepped out of the shadows, his eyes hard and mouth pressed tight. His gaze skimmed over me, then slid back to Cory. “Don’t call me that, Cody.”
“I knew it was you. Why are you following her around?” He pushed Finn’s shoulders and Finn stumbled backward. “Are you some kind of sicko who can’t take no for an answer?”
Finn curled his hands into fists and stepped forward, his eyes narrow slits. “Push me again, and I’ll be the sicko who breaks your fucking face.”
Cory pushed him. Finn snarled and hauled back his fist, ready to do some damage. Cory, the fool, didn’t even back off. He was either too drunk to see the immediate danger he was in, or he seriously underestimated Finn’s strength. This wasn’t going to end well.
I couldn’t sit by and let Cory get hurt because I’d kissed him in front of Finn. Couldn’t let either of them get hurt. I threw myself in front of Cory, arms akimbo. “Finn, no! Don’t hurt him. I’m fine.”
Finn’s fist remained raised and something in his jaw ticked. “Get out of the way, Carrie.”
Cory shoved me aside roughly, and I fumbled to regain my balance. “Yeah, let the freak stalker take his punch. I’ll slam his white trash ass in jail so fast, he won’t have time to say lawyer up.”
“Stop being such a jerk, Cory. He’s not a stalker,” I said, tugging Cory back. My anonymity would have to come to an end. If I didn’t tell Cory who Finn really was, he’d never shut up about this. Never back off. “He’s my bod—”
“Ex-boyfriend,” Finn interjected. “And I can’t stop following her because I want her back.”
I blinked at him. “We don’t have to do this, Finn. Just tell him—”
“Good luck?” Finn slammed me with a look that clearly told me to play along. He didn’t want me telling Cory who I really was. Why not? “I can’t. I can’t let another man have you.”
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