by Mirajane
Chapter Two
Tyler
I pushed myself back from my computer screen, leaned back in my chair and wiped my eyes with my hands. My eyes were sore and a bit fried. I’d been working in front of the computer for about six hours straight without a break. It had been a long hard week, but starting up new ventures was always a bit difficult. That was what made it so exciting, and why I loved focusing so hard on things that I was so passionate about. If I didn’t have this level of commitment, then I really wouldn’t have endured the amount of success I had.
I reached out with my ears as I realized that I was so alone in the building. It was almost ten in the evening. Everyone else had left hours before, but as usual I was still working up late into the night. I didn’t want to stop but my mind and body were tired. I needed to rest.
Tomorrow I was going back home. Shit. I wasn’t sure how to feel about it, except a bit depressed. I’d been away from home since the summer after high school. Between college and starting my businesses, I hadn’t been home since then. And I’d enjoyed being away. Too many painful memories there.
But I had to go back. My grandmother was getting on in years and I had to see her before she passed. I wasn’t sure how many more Christmases she really had left and I didn’t want to miss any time with her. She’d raised me after my parents died in a car crash when I was eleven. She was everything to me.
I hated the fact I had to leave her and go away to school, but she understood why I did it. High school had not been very good to me. I was the outcast, the nerd, the target basically and I had put up with several years of garbage. The day that I graduated was the happiest day of my life so that I could just leave that school, that town, and all the people who made it their mission in life every single day to make fun of me and torture me.
I wanted to laugh about it now. Hell, I had changed so much. None of them would even recognize me now. I was going back there for the holidays to visit my grandmother and wondered if I would see anyone. It was inevitable if I spent any time in town at all, or just stepping outside I was liable to run into someone. And they would probably not even remember the way they had treated me.
I admit I had some of it coming, since I was short, skinny with big glasses, acne, and no style or shred of confidence. But was that actually a reason to be tormented on a daily basis? I didn’t think so.
I tried to laugh about it now. I tried to put it behind me as I enjoyed my lavish lifestyle, but it was amazing what the scars of childhood would do to you. They would hang onto you so tightly and never let go. They followed you through the rest of your life.
I didn’t want to, but I signed out of the computer and shut it down as I had promised my best friend, Paul that I’ll be coming over for a few beers at his place. Then I grabbed my stuff and headed out of my office. I stared around at the huge building around me, at the companies I was building and what I’d already built and I still marveled at it. All of this had happened so fast, after starting to mess around on my laptop in my college dorm room. I realized that I could start a business that would make some money, mostly selling products for other people at first to pick up some cash, and then putting that cash into some other ventures I was working on. At first it was selling software, and then it became more about producing great websites and selling those domains for a hefty profit. It was similar to the idea of flipping houses, only I was flipping domain names. It had grown very lucrative as of late and I was able to cash in on it.
I left the office building and walked towards my car in the parking lot. The air in Cincinnati was warmer than expected in late December, and it felt good. The parking lot was empty except for my car, a shiny BMW that drove like a dream. I loved that car. Ever since I was a teenager, I’d thought about what it would be like to have such a sweet, luxurious automobile, but it was far from being my most elaborate. My actual favorites were my Lamborghini, and my Ferrari. They were the cars I liked to have fun in, but this car was just functional at work. It gave me the image of success and at the same time it was not screaming that I was trying to gain attention. That wasn’t something that I had ever really been that interested in. I just wanted to be free and happy. And I was, essentially. I didn’t even have to work anymore. The software I had created about a year ago and sold to one of the biggest tech companies in the world, had made me wealthy beyond my wildest dreams, but I was young and I had so much more that I wanted to accomplish. That was the thing that drove me. I wanted to do more. I didn’t need money anymore. This gave me the ability to be free enough to only follow my passions.
As I slid into my car, and I began to peel out of the parking lot, my mind began to wander to different things. I was leaving first thing in the morning, making the drive over to Athens, my hometown to spend the holidays with my grandmother and of course I would see so many of my family members there as well. I had several aunts, uncles, and cousins I had not seen much since I left. Cincinnati was not on the other side of the world, but it was a two hour drive, and that too with the reckless speed that I drove. If you wanted to ensure your own safety, it would take you closer to three hours. But that was not that bad, if the weather was decent. Yet, when you lived in such a small town, the big city just seemed so out of reach. You just didn’t go there unless you really needed to.
Angie.
The name just popped into my head as I drove along listening to some nineties alternative and grunge music on my Sirius XM radio. I had not thought of her in so long, but thinking about home, it was almost inevitable. Actually, I was surprised it had taken me this long to think about her. The place I grew up and that girl were inextricably linked. The image of her beautiful face just popped into my head at the thought of her sweet name. The moment I did, I automatically became possessed of some sort of anxiety that came over me. I couldn’t believe how after all this time, I was still in love with her. Was it love? I thought it always had been. She never would have guessed that I’d felt that way about her but out of all of my fellow classmates, Angie had been the one who had gone out of her way to be nice to me. We weren’t friends exactly. We never hung out anywhere or anything, but she was cordial and friendly, and she would actually have a conversation with me from time to time.
“So, you going to ask her out this time?” My best friend Paul Arnold said when I told him over the drinks that I was going back to my home town tomorrow. I’d told him a few times about Angie and a little about how I had spent my high school years. He could sympathize with me. He was one of the nerdiest guys I’d ever met, but instead of working out, clearing his skin up, and having a nice growth spurt freshman year of college, he just didn’t care and went out of his way to ask out women who were so far out of his league that it wasn’t even funny. What was more disturbing was that occasionally he got dates with these women.
“I doubt it,” I said. “That was years ago and she never thought of me that way.”
“Dude, you look like a GQ model or something. I mean, if a young Christian Bale had better hair, he might have been as handsome as you are.”
“Thanks, man. I appreciate you saying that,” I replied. “But it doesn’t change anything. We live in different worlds. I think she is in college at Ohio State. I dropped out of college when the business took off and I live in Cincinnati. We are practically worlds apart. Besides, she is probably with some guy. She always had a thing for jocks.”
He pointed at me with a large grin. “Dude, that is so you.”
I laughed. “I’m hardly a jock. I just like to stay active.”
Paul rolled his eyes. “Dude. You work out every single day. You do kickboxing, you play several different sports, you hike, and you even started rock climbing recently, right?”
I laughed. “I do like to stay active and vary my activities. What’s wrong with all that?”
“Nothing, but you are essentially a jock. I mean, imagine what the jocks from your high school are doing now. They are all probably nursing fat beer guts, most of them didn’t get any s
pots on the college teams if they went to school, and the ones who didn’t go to school are probably working some low paying job and being constantly reminded of how their entire life peaked at eighteen. That’s depressing.”
I laughed. There was no one like Paul to put things into perspective and make me realize that my life had turned out pretty damn good. I was lucky and I was enjoying the freedom my lifestyle afforded.
“That may be all true, but I do have another life that keeps me out of Columbus and away from whatever Angie has going on. I don’t think she comes back to Athens much anyway. I just happened to mention it would be nice to see her, but I don’t think I will.”
“Ok, well you should look her up online.”
“That’s creepy.”
“How is it creepy? That stuff exists to stay in touch with people as they embark on new and exciting journeys in their lives.
“It’s never been my thing,” I said. “But I’ll keep you in the loop if I happen to see this girl again.”
“Well, she sounds like a lot more than that, than just a girl. I’ve heard you speak about her on several occasions, and it’s not just that, but the way that your face lights up, the look in your eyes, and the way that you rub your palms together and sometimes cross your arms when you talk about her that tells me that she is very special to you.”
I looked at him incredulously.
“What?” he asked. “You surprised that I notice things?”
I laughed. “I am actually. That’s like some serious attention to detail there. I’m intrigued. I’m surprised that your sales numbers aren’t higher.”
Paul was one of our best sales people. He was currently going online and making contacts with people to help get funding for the next venture we were working to build. I was thinking about taking the leap and actually branching out into real estate. Paul was definitely the guy that could help me make that leap. He had a real knack for dealing with people.
“So, how about it?” he asked. “You should just go for it and see what happens. I can see it all playing out right now. You end up running into each other in that small town and then you start to rekindle things, then it turns romantic, and finally you end up having that first romantic kiss. This will in turn be followed by a beautiful love scene.”
I shook my head and tried to contain my laughter. “Dude, you have got to stop watching those chick flicks late at night.”
“What? They are beautiful stories. They’ve awakened the hopeless romantic in me. What can I say?”
“You are crazy,” I replied. “But I’ll let you know when none of that ends up happening.”
And I’d left the conversation at that. But now on the drive home, I couldn’t stop imagining it, too. What if something like that did happen? What would I do? How would I react to it? Would I let myself fall hopelessly in love with Angie? Would she even be the same person? Was I building all this up in my head just to get totally let down?
As I pulled into my garage and I watched the door close shut behind me, the daydream kept filling my head and I felt my heart soaring a bit. That would be beautiful. But then reality hit me and I knew that it would never work, especially once Angie found out about my secret.
The secret…that was how I liked to refer to it. I had a huge secret. No one knew it. I’d never been able to tell anyone. How would I even have broached that subject? They wouldn’t have believed me anyway. And if they did believe me, that would have been almost worse in a way.
I could never tell anyone. If they knew, it might put them in danger, and they would never accept me for who I am. What would Angie say if she found out that I was a bear shifter?
I’d been a shifter for almost four years now. It all started the summer after high school. I went camping with a few friends of mine and while I was there I was attacked by a bear. We all were. The bear attacked the camp. Luckily, my friend Horace had a gun and he shot at the bear. He missed, but scared it off.
We were all sleeping in the middle of the night in a large tent. I woke to some strange sounds. At first, it was just some rustling and scratching. Then, it quickly turned into what was undeniably a low, growling sound that quickly escalated into a roar.
Before we could even get fully awake, the bear was ramming its bulbous weight into the tent and attacking us. Horace and Ralphie made it out of the tent as the bear was inside of it thrashing around and they ran to the car. I was the last one out and the bear grabbed me by the ankle. I felt the searing pain as its claw ripped my flesh and then it jerked me backwards. I landed a few feet away outside the tent. I was done for. I had landed so hard on the ground that the wind was knocked out of me. I could not breathe and I was feeling like my head was spinning. But I had to run. I had to get away from this monster before it ate me. It was about to take a huge bite out of me.
Then the gunshots rang out. I could see the bear staggering back as a bullet grazed its shoulder. The bullets were whipping dangerously close to myself as well. I immediately was so thankful that Horace had brought that gun. Ralphie and I laughed at him, when he said he was bringing it. This wasn’t even supposed to be bear country, but his preparedness had saved my life.
The bear quickly ran off into the woods. I laid there for a moment trying to collect myself. I’d never been so scared in my entire life. I’d almost been killed just then. The large claw mark on my shin and foot was deep and spurting blood horribly as I lay there in pain.
Horace and Ralphie came to check me out quickly and both of them were so blown away by the gash on my shin that I thought they both might pass out or vomit. “Shit man! Are you ok?” Horace asked me.
“I don’t know,” I said. “Help me out of here. We have to leave before it comes back. I need a hospital I think.” I was already worried about losing my foot. The gash was horrifically deep.
They helped me to the car and we drove out of there. The nearest hospital was about twenty minutes away, and during that time I gradually felt the pain lessening. By the time we got to the hospital, the gash had healed completely. Horace and Ralphie were floored. We couldn’t explain how it had healed so quickly.
It wasn’t until a few days later when the changes began within me that I started piecing together what had happened. And my life has never been the same since then.
And that had been over four years ago. It was hard to believe that I’d been living with this dark secret for so long. I’d become rather proficient at controlling the change. I’d learned how to keep those sinister urges under control, and I’d become good at living a very private life, even as my life started to spin a bit out of control with all the success I’d been lucky enough to have.
I went inside the house and grabbed some pizza leftovers from the fridge. I placed them on a microwave plate, popped in the microwave and then grabbed a beer as I sat down at the table. I had worked through lunch and forgotten all about eating until now. Sometimes, that happened. Actually, it happened more often than not.
“Man, Tyler, you have got to learn some balance,” I said aloud. The large empty house around me responded with silence. I was rather used to it since I lived alone. I used to think that I loved living alone, but I realized from time to time that it was really just an escape. It was a way of holding onto my privacy, but it was more about hiding myself from the world in case anyone ever got close enough to me that they would learn my terrible secret.
I’d come so close so many times to just spilling the beans to someone, like Paul, but I always went back on it. I always backed out. It was just not something that I could ever bring myself to tell anyone. But I was lonely. I wanted a special woman in my life. It had been a long time since I’d even dated. Part of that was due to me being a workaholic, and the other part of that was because I just didn’t trust myself enough to share this secret with anyone, and I didn’t trust the other person enough to keep the secret if I did share it. They would just think I was crazy, and that kind of weirdness would start to spread, to get around.
I fin
ished my pizza and then went into the living room. I pulled my old high school yearbook off the shelf and began to leaf through it. Soon, I found a picture of Angie. I stared at it for a long time. She was so beautiful. She didn’t realize it, I don’t think. I mean, she was never one of those stuck up types, even though she was considered somewhat popular. Of course, the only reason she was really considered popular for a little while was because of the thing that went down between her and Oren.
I still remembered how bad that had been. I’d come so close to punching his fucking lights out. But at the time, he was a good three inches taller and about thirty pounds heavier than me. Plus, he had the entire football team on his side. I’d almost got into with him anyway. He picked on me—that was one thing, but when he started spreading lies about Angie, that was the final straw. I wished to hell I would have let him have it, no matter the consequence. Ah, well…life dealt him a bad enough hand.
I closed the yearbook and went up to my bedroom to finish packing. It was so odd remembering high school. It felt like it had been so long ago, but it was really only a few years. So much had changed. And I knew that going back now would be like having a reunion of sorts. I was bound to run into someone that I knew there, but the likelihood of it being Angie was very remote. I had often thought about contacting her on social media, asking her to accept a contact request, or even contacting her parents and asking them if I could have her contact info, to make it more personal, but I never had. It would feel so random to reach out to her just out of the blue. I wasn’t sure why I didn’t just try to keep in touch with her after school ended, and now it just felt weird.
I often wondered if that was one of the biggest reasons I’d never fallen in love. I had a secret, but I also was in love with someone else. I think that was accurate. I wasn’t sure you could call it love if it was just one sided, but I knew that Angie was very special to me and she always had been. Paul was right; he saw a lot.
