by Bella J
So much heat, so much desire…so many unwanted feelings, it felt like I was floating in a cloud of confusion, contradictions surrounding me like a threatening thunderstorm.
Once again my mind and my body were battling a war deep inside me, a war that threatened to break down every stronghold protecting me from succumbing, to surrendering to the one man whose sole purpose was to destroy me.
“Tell me, Tatum. Tell me that your body isn’t responding to mine.” He flexed, and I felt his cock push against the hollow of my back. “Fuck knows my body keeps responding to you, no matter how hard I try to fight it.” He moved, pushing me toward the shower. “Every time my cock gets hard around you, I curse the desire that burns in my loins. I hate the need that consumes me whenever I come close to you. I abhor the lust that pulses through my body every time I goddamn look at you.”
His words, his voice, the feel of his naked body against mine were all working together, guaranteeing a landslide win for my body, my mind not standing a chance.
A few more steps and he had successfully coaxed me into the shower one step at a time, and all I could think about was how I didn’t want him to leave, how I didn’t want him to pull his body away from mine. I loved his heat, yet hated the way my thighs clenched. I relished the feel of skin against skin, but despised the way his touch electrified me. He…me…us, whatever was happening between us was an extreme paradox as we hated and desired at the same time.
The water that came down on us was hot, but not as hot as his body searing my skin.
He kept pushing until my front was pressed against the wall of the shower. He placed his strong arms on either side of me, cocooning me, his heat surrounding me completely.
I was slipping. I was slipping down to the deepest parts of Hell by allowing my body to overrule my mind. This was all so goddamn twisted, sick, and wicked…exactly what I’ve always wanted, and fighting it seemed all the more impossible.
God, I hated myself. Maybe I deserved Vico’s lashings. Maybe I deserved to be killed by the Fattores—by anyone for that matter. My body, my soul was too wicked to go unpunished, which is probably why my fate had brought me here, to meet my ultimate demise.
Then you might as well just give in and let out the warped desire since you’ll die soon anyway…
“Tell me your body isn’t on fire for me right now, Tatum.”
“Castello…”
His hand dipped between me and the wall, and for the life of me I couldn’t stop myself from shifting my body, pushing harder against him, allowing his hand to settle between my legs.
I gasped and moaned at the same time he dragged a finger through my slit.
“Jesus Christ, Tatum. Your body is dripping for me.”
It was true. From the desire that pulsed inside me, I knew my need was pooling between my legs.
He pushed his cock against my ass, thrusting so hard that my feet lifted off the floor, his finger slicking deeper between my legs.
“I bet there’s a raging war going on inside that little head of yours. You’re probably cursing your body while your mind is hating me so fucking much right now.”
More hard thrusting, more touching and flicking between my legs. My body was on the verge of exploding, my mind spiraling out of control with all the mixed emotions and feelings currently twisted together in the pit of my stomach.
“You can’t do this to me,” I whispered, my cheek plastered against the wall.
He flexed behind me, pushing his hand deeper between my legs before slipping his finger easily inside me. A loud moan escaped me, and I pushed my ass harder against him.
“It seems like I already did.”
“Oh God…”
Soft lips found the delicate skin of my neck, and once again my body overruled my head by allowing me to tilt my neck to the side, wanting to give his lips more of me to kiss, to devour. It was the most intense high I had ever experienced—the fight, the surrender, the downright fucked-up-ness of it all. Everything about us, right now, in this moment was insanely powerful.
I couldn’t stop my body from rocking against him, wanting his finger to move inside me. “This is wrong on so many levels, Castello.”
“Which is why it feels so fucking good.” A second finger entered me, my entire body shuddering from the pleasure that wracked through my core, up my spine.
He sucked my earlobe between his lips before biting down, the pain ricocheting between my legs where he kept on working me relentlessly.
“You never answered my question, little mouse.”
“What question?” He pushed his fingers in deeper, and I moaned.
Slowly he swept my hair together before winding it around his fist, jerking my head back with force that made my scalp sting. “Did my brother fuck you the way you wanted to be fucked?”
Instantly my body went cold, my spine frozen completely. The water cascading down on us felt like hard pebbles rather than soft droplets. The two fingers inside me were no longer welcome, feeling more like an invasion than a means for release. Mentioning his brother, Carlo, gave my mind more strength to fight my greedy body. All the lies, all the deceit, the fear came storming back like a hurricane of unwelcome, painful emotions.
“Castello, stop.” I placed my hands against the wall trying to push myself back, no longer wanting his body against mine. But his fingers still kept their rhythm, his body not giving way.
“Your head might tell you that you want me to stop, but the slickness of your pussy tells me something completely different.”
“I might not be able to control my body around you, but my mind is stronger than you think.”
“Your head can conjure lies, telling you what you think is right. But your body can’t lie, not to me.” All it took was one calculating move of his thumb, pressing against the spot that made my entire body shake, causing my mind to crumble into nothing but thoughts and images of the most twisted acts of sin.
This was so wrong, too wrong, but I didn’t know how to stop it—whether I wanted to stop it. My body went from hot, to cold, to hot again within the span of a few seconds, my head spinning with the need to fight, yet my body spiraling out of control with the ache to find release.
“Stop fighting it, little mouse.”
“Never.”
My body rocked, my mind fought, my insides coiled tight—I was certain I would combust at any second.
Another hard thrust and I braced myself against the wall as he pushed his cock up between my ass cheeks, intensifying the need that throbbed between my legs.
“Do you know what I thought while I watched Vico beat you with his belt?” More thrusts, more relentless touching and penetrating of fingers. “I thought about how much I wanted to be the one dealing out the lashes. I envied my brother for having the pleasure of painting your body with stripes of red, so much so that I entertained the most murderous thoughts toward my little brother.”
“Yet you saved me from enduring the full punishment.”
“Because I couldn’t stand the fact that you were enduring pain from someone else, and not me.”
A loud crack echoed through the shower, and then came the burn of flesh, the sting of his palm against my ass. It felt so goddamn good, the pain that rebounded between my legs and up my spine. Castello increased the pressure of his thumb, pushing harder, moving faster in circles of pleasure.
There was no holding back now as I started to pant like a needy whore—which was what I had turned into under this man’s touch. A whore who couldn’t fight the animalistic urges pulsing through her veins like venom.
Another hard palm against my ass and I moaned out loud as the pressure in my core started to build, threatening to shatter me. He moved his hand up my side, over my shoulder, wrapping his fingers tightly around my neck, pushing me closer and closer toward the edge of lust and insanity. Yet my mind kept on trying to fight it, even though my body had passed the point of no return. I refused to acknowledge the fact that I had lost the fight against his wick
ed ways and sordid touch, but that imminent release kept getting closer and closer.
“Stop, little mouse. Stop fighting what your body wants and needs…from me.”
“I can’t. I will never stop fighting you.”
“Then I’ll just have to try harder in breaking you.” He squeezed his fingers tight around my throat, air becoming less and less. My body moved in sync with the rhythm of how his fingers fucked me, and I knew right then I was lost. My soul, my body, everything was lost.
“Do not deny me your pleasure, little mouse. Give me what your body so desperately wants to give.”
He squeezed harder, tighter, until I could no longer breathe in an ounce of air. The pressure in my throat and chest from not breathing, paired together with the pressure building between my legs was indescribable. It was euphoric yet frightening at the same damn time. My mind no longer fought, finally retreating to the shadows of my depravity.
“Give it to me, little mouse. Give me your surrender…now.” Pain seared through my shoulder when he sunk his teeth into my flesh, the last push I needed to splinter into pieces. My body erupted, fiery pleasure spreading through my body like molten lava, burning every last drop of fight I had in me. The release that wracked through me was so strong, it felt like it had the power to break me in half. My body soared, my mind cried, my soul completely shattered as the climax ripped through me, leaving me shaking and shuddering. Harder, faster his fingers moved inside me, milking every last ounce of pleasure from me as my release gushed down his fingers and hand. It was indescribable, the sinful decadence of him pushing my body over the edge.
I moaned and gasped for air the second he let go of my neck, the oxygen burning the insides of my throat, my lungs screaming with relief as air finally settled inside my chest.
“Turn around.” He pulled my arm and spun me around, slamming my back against the wall. Water splashed, iron wills crashed while hate and lust clashed like a battle of gods. My legs were shaking, my body still shuddering with the potent remnants of my release.
“Watch me. Look at what you do to me, little mouse.”
I glanced down and saw him rubbing his cock, jerking up and down hard and fast. I looked up at him, but he grabbed the back of my head forcing me to look down.
“I said watch.”
Even though self-hatred was now my friend, loathing the fact that I had allowed him to make me come, watching him pleasure himself, seeing the desire that caused his cock to stand proud had me whimpering as a new ache of need started between my legs.
He grabbed my leg, settling it between his hip and arm as he glanced down at the cut he had inflicted earlier.
“I made you bleed,” he whispered, not slowing down on his strokes. “I cut you, and I fucking loved it.”
He looked up and our eyes met, desire staring into desire. Lust staring into lust. I have never experienced anything as powerful, as consuming as this…with him…with my enemy.
“Tell me, little mouse, did you like it, too? When I made you bleed, making you feel alive again?”
Dark eyes bore into mine, everything around us fading to black. I no longer felt the water, the cold of the wall against my back, or the swirling hate toward my own body. All I felt was him…us…now, and the heavy truth that lay on the tip of my tongue.
“Yes.” I never took my gaze from his. “Yes, I loved it, too.”
“Jesus.” His eyes fell closed, his arm gripping my thigh tighter. He rocked his hips while pumping his cock, brushing the tip against my belly until his body shook when he finally found his release, pulsing it all over my stomach.
I closed my eyes, leaning my head back, completely spent. There wasn’t an ounce of strength left inside me, nothing to fight the regret and the revulsion that dropped like a veil over my soul.
I just experienced the most powerful, vehement, intense sexual encounter of my life…and I never hated myself more.
14
CASTELLO
I fucked up.
Staring down, watching the water wash away the seed that I just pulsed all over her stomach I thought about the million ways I just fucked up. This was not supposed to happen. I was not supposed to succumb to the temptation. But dear God, I couldn’t stop it. Her naked body, the red and pink lashes that decorated her back, together with the forbidden that was her, I couldn’t stop myself. Every fucked-up part of me took control…and I let it.
Even now, seconds away from the release that slowly washed down the drain, I still felt the burn inside my groin for her. Why—because I wanted to fuck her. I wanted to bend her over, wrap her perfect, sleek body in rope, hoist her in the air and push my cock deep inside her, hearing her screams ricocheted off my goddamn bedroom walls. I wanted to see her squirm against the bounds, watch her skin scrape against the tight, harsh rope that kept her in place. The sick fuck inside me wanted to see her hang upside down unable to move while I licked and ate her pussy like a starved predator.
What just happened between us was unfortunately far from enough to sate the beast. It wanted so much more…of her.
“Castello, please.”
Her voice snapped me out of my wicked trance.
I looked down witnessing how she clutched her arms around her shivering body.
What the fuck have I done?
I stepped back, water spilling over my face like it was possible to wash away every sin I ever committed—including this one.
Without looking at her I got out of the shower. “You have two minutes to wash yourself. And I told you before, you don’t get to use my name.” I needed to tap into that rage, into the hunger for revenge again. I needed to pull my fucking shit together.
Turning around, I pulled one of the black towels off the rail. I grabbed my pants, slipped them on before reaching for my shirt.
While buttoning up I turned then balked when I saw her standing there, completely naked and dripping wet. Her blonde hair looked dark as it clung to her face and shoulders, water streaming down from the ends. Her ivory skin was perfectly unblemished with just the faintest kiss from the sun. Crystal blue eyes sparkled and beamed even though she had been put through so much in such a short period of time.
But it was when my gaze settled between her legs, when the bare, beautiful soft skin of her pussy taunted me, teasing my already painfully hard cock.
Dark visions of red fogged my mind. The vivid sound of beautiful panting breaths filled my ears, and it all made it too hard for me to stay in reality—a reality where I was her captor and she was a slave…a slave I would ultimately end up killing.
I tossed the towel at her. “Dry yourself.”
“I don’t have anything to wear.”
Pulling my hands through my hair, trying to get the ink black strands to look less…fucked, I searched around the bathroom, but found nothing remotely wearable.
“The towel will have to do. You can wrap it around yourself.”
“Please, Castello. Just give me something to—”
“Stop!” The way the word please rolled off her lips, the sincerity behind it made it even more difficult for me to control myself. I started pacing, my head feeling like it was about to explode, my body feeling like it was about to burst into flames. “Just wear the goddamn towel. And this is the last fucking time I warn you about using my name.”
Without drying her first, she wrapped the towel around her. “What should I call you then? Master? Sir? Boss? Lover?”
It just happened. I snapped, and launched myself forward, grabbing her around her throat and slamming her against the wall. “You’re playing with fire, little mouse. Do not test me. Do not think that you have the balls to go up against me, because you will lose. I saved your ass from getting beaten to a pulp once, next time I won’t be so fucking nice.”
“You wouldn’t have needed to save me from your brother if you didn’t give him permission to beat me in the first place.”
Good God this woman was treading on dangerous ground, pushing me, provoking me, causing t
he blood inside my veins to boil with a lethal mixture of rage and lust.
I squeezed my fingers tighter around her throat, leaning my face closer to hers. The citrus scent of the shampoo she used was familiar since it was my goddamn shampoo. But on her it smelled fucking delicious, tantalizing my taste buds. I wanted to taste her, lick her, bite her, devour her until there was nothing fucking left.
“You need to know when to keep your goddamn mouth shut.”
“And you need to learn when to keep your fucking fingers to yourself.”
I smiled, her bravery—or stupidity amused me. I loosened my grip around her neck just a little, then lifted a finger tracing it softly across her luscious lips. “You mean this finger?” I placed my middle finger on her lips as well before forcing it inside her mouth. “Or this finger? They were both inside you, little mouse, and you rode them like your fucking life depended on it.” Around and around I swirled my fingers through her mouth, expecting her to take a chance and bite down, but she didn’t. In fact, I felt her tongue move, grazing against my fingertips, like she was inviting me, coaxing me to give her more.
If only you knew how much more I wanted to give you, little mouse…and how much I want to take from you…
“Can you taste yourself on my fingers, your pleasure?”
Her blue irises grew brighter with every passing second, but she didn’t try to hide the anger and the hate.
I loved it.
I loved how she looked at me with hate and lust, rage and desire, fury and need.
With a sexual hunger starting to bubble in the pit of my stomach, my cock twitching, wanting, demanding to take her, I licked my lips while keeping my gaze on hers. Her chest was rapidly rising and falling pressing her breasts harder against my body aggravating the ache in my groin.
“How do you taste, little mouse?” I leaned closer never taking my eyes off her mouth. “Tell me what you taste like.”
