by Bry Ann
“Hershey’s kisses,” I say quickly.
He smiles. “Yum, those come in big bags, too. Let’s do it.” It’s then I realize how good at his job he is, because I’m already at the car away from Derek. Landon opens the door and lets me inside. That happened so fast. How’d he do that?
Landon gets in on the other side. I place both hands on the bulletproof glass and look around frantically for Derek. I find him quickly. He’s in the same spot. That big, tough agent, Collin, is beside him with a firm hand on his shoulder. Derek’s head is down and he’s pushing his fingers into his eye sockets, his face a mask of pain. Collin’s trying to help him, but… but he’s not.
Derek’s hurting.
All I want is to help him. I don’t even want the candy, even if it is a Hershey’s Kiss.
Derek
God, she was so scared. I don’t think it was possible for her to be shaking any harder against me. When she jumped into my arms like I was her life raft and she was lost at sea, I could feel every tremor, every shake, every bone-wrenching sob that her body expelled.
“Derek,” Collin says for the third time. “I need you to look at me, man.”
Finally, I look up at my friend, terrified of what he’ll see.
“Oh hey, you’re alive.”
I roll my eyes. “You’re hysterical,” I state dryly.
“Derek, that couldn’t have gone smoother.”
He searches my eyes. For what, I don’t know.
“It went well. You did good. More than good. This is a big win.”
“Yeah, I know.” But why don’t I feel better?
Collin pauses a moment, then places his hand on my shoulder. With that one act, as my friend, not my boss, I let my head fall and I pinch my eyes shut.
“Let’s get all the logistic shit over with, then we can go out, get beers, and talk. Alright?”
I nod, seeing no other choice in the matter.
“You gotta get your head on straight for this last part. You have to.”
I woosh out a breath and lift my head. “Okay. Okay, I’m back.”
“This isn’t gonna be easy, man.”
“I know. Let’s just get it over with.”
He slaps me once on the back and walks forward.
“Here goes nothing.”
Easy for him to say.
“Where is he? Where?” I half expect the screaming female to be Lacey, but it’s not. It’s Rose, Sven’s wife. She’s buzzing around the lobby frantically, with one of her best friends, Maria, by her side. Maria is in nothing but a slip of a dress, but her eyebrows are furrowed and focused like she’ll be the one to solve this problem, as if that is possible.
Maria is dealing with Rose, so while she does that, I look for Lacey. It doesn’t take long to find her. She’s in the back of the room, eyes unfocused and unblinking, still as a statue. The all-black sweat outfit she’s wearing is drowning her small frame. I don’t see her daughter around, so I’m assuming she’s with her nanny, or more likely her friend Radar, ‘til this is dealt with. By her side is a large man riddled with scars: Cut, her boxing trainer and friend. He’s not talking to her or trying to snap her out of whatever trance she’s in. He’s simply standing by her side. In a way, it’s the best form of loyalty.
It takes a while for Lacey to blink. Maria has long since calmed Rose, she’s now opting for sobbing in Maria’s lap. It’s around that time that Lacey starts to take in her surroundings. I dread the moment she finds me. But it happens. Relief crosses her features at first, relief that I’m not behind bars, but then confusion. Why aren’t I?
Then she sees the FBI vest I threw on in the car. What I see on her face next kills me. Despair. Loneliness. Hopelessness. Her head shakes back and forth. Her feet stumble backwards until she crashes into a wall, nearly falling until Cut steadies her, looking nearly on the verge of tears for her pain. Maria’s even looking over at the two of them with masked horror.
“No, you… you…”
Then I see it. The moment I expected, where her body refuses to be weak anymore and pure rage overtakes her. She flies at me before Cut can catch her.
“I trusted you!” She shrieks. “You did this? How could you do this to me? We were friends!”
Were.
Her hand flies across my cheek.
“You know everything,” she sobs, crumbling, still trying to swat at my chest. “You know and you…”
Cut grabs her from behind and gently pulls her away. He leans into her ear.
“Come on, girl. He’s FBI, don’t get yourself in trouble.”
“You think I care?” she whispers brokenly.
“Rose needs her mom,” he reminds her.
She slumps against him.
“Are you with the CIA, too?” Lacey snaps at Cut.
“You know I’m not,” he replies in an even tone.
She pauses a moment, letting it all hit her. When it does, she looks back up at me.
“I hate you, Enzio. I hate you down to the depths of my soul.” Rose comes over to her friend, tears still staining her cheeks, and pulls Lacey away, leading her to where she and Maria are seated. When they’re gone, Cut looks at me with a scowl, eyes full of hatred, but doesn’t say anything before turning away. I could have nailed him, too, and he knows it. He wouldn’t care as much if he didn’t have Maria, but he does, so he has to be careful.
I stand here like a lost puppy. For the first time in my career, unsure of what to do.
“Derek.”
I spin around to find Kyle standing there, studying me intensely. I can’t look at him. He sees far too much.
“You need to get out of here.” His eyes narrow. “Now.”
I nod, feeling strangely disconnected from my body.
“Iris is here.”
For the first time since arriving at the station, I perk up.
“Is she okay?”
He smiles, knowingly.
“Yes. You should see her. She had your back as much as you had hers, I’m guessing.”
Already on my way, I brush past him. “You don’t guess, Kyle. Don’t be an asshole.”
“She’s attractive.”
He walks up beside me. I glare at him.
“Yeah, attractive, post-kidnapping, and traumatized. Maybe I’ll ask her out.”
Kyle stays quiet for a long time. When we reach the double doors, he grabs my shoulder, halting me.
“None of this is your fault, Derek. Lacey losing her family,” he shakes his head, “is tragic, but not your fault. It’s not hers either. It’s Adam’s. He knew the risk of this life. He knew the risk of taking Iris, and he took her anyway, with a wife and daughter at home. This isn’t on you.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“Do you?”
His brown eyes dig in deeper. I have to tilt my shoulder to get his eyes off me.
“Sure.”
He stiffens.
“Be careful, Derek.”
That’s all he says before throwing the door open. I’m thrown out of my thoughts when I see Iris sitting there, fidgeting with her filthy plaid button down. Collin sits across from her with his signature sympathetic, but firm, expression.
“Derek!”
Iris jumps out of her chair. Collin smirks at me. I’m forced to ignore him, because Iris is running straight over. When she’s right in my face, she pauses.
“Are you okay? You hurtin’?” I clear my throat. I’m FBI Agent Derek Enzio Johnson. Not some random dude. I’ve been trained to handle these situations.
“I’m good, Iris. How are you?”
She frowns and kicks her boot into the floor slightly. The motion allows me to take in the fact that she hasn’t changed clothes or showered since arriving at the station. Purposely?
“Don’t be like that. We have to at least be friends after all this, right?” I’m done making friends I can only hurt. “Of course.”
I keep my tone 100% professional. Iris’s frown deepens. She opens her mouth, but quickly close
s it, realizing she doesn’t know what to say.
“I want to thank you for not blowing my cover in there, and trusting me. I couldn’t have done this case without that.”
“Oh, psh.” She waves her hand. “It was nothin’. Thank you for not lettin’ me get murdered or anythin’. That’s, like, really appreciated. Mama and Pap would have been…”For the first time since I entered the room, she looks sad. Her eyes are pools of despair when she looks back at me.
“They would have been crushed. And King, he would have lost his mind and gotten himself into trouble.”“That doesn’t sound like anyone I know.”
I smirk at her and raise an eyebrow. Her cheeks turn a beautiful shade of red.
“Me neither.”
But with her fingers, she squints her face and makes a small pinching motion. She’s too damn cute.
“Okay, I really hate to interrupt, but we should probably finish,” Collin cuts in.
“Yes, sir.”
She glances at me and sticks out her tongue, making a disgusted face. I burst out laughing. I did not expect that from her. She’s been nothing but respectful since I met her.
“Should I give you two the room?”
Iris laughs and saunters over to the chair. By the time she’s there, she looks completely polite and open. What the— How does she switch over so fast?
Collin looks over at me with mischief in his eyes. Oh, we will be talking later. Great, just fuckin’ great. He clears his throat and turns back to Iris. Forcing my body to move, I sit beside him.
“Ms. Shelby, do you mind telling us how you come to be in the presence of Sven Xander, Frances Capello, and Adam Ruston?”
I watch Iris to see how she’ll react to Collin’s question. Her face forms a grim line and her eyes flash with emotion.“I was lookin’ for Adam Ruston. I didn’t know who he was. I certainly didn’t know he was in the mafia. Let alone the boss. Well, I found ‘im. I got taken off the street by Frances because he was suspicious of me. They broke my finger when I wouldn’t tell them what they wanted to know.”
She holds her finger up with a frown.
“His wife, Lacey, really helped me afterward, and no name kept me safe.”
“No name?” Collin asks, cocking an eyebrow.Her cheeks turn flaming red. She barely manages to look at me.
“That’s what I called Derek in my head ‘cause he wouldn’t tell me his name when we first met. I’m really weird.”
Okay, I can’t deny that both Collin and I aren’t smirking now. Between her accent, the nickname, and the level of humiliation she feels, it’s kind of funny… and oddly flattering.
“Alright,” Collin chuckles with a twisted smile, trying to get a grip on himself. “Did you hear or see anything suspicious while you were there?”
The interview goes on like this for almost an hour. I notice that she never says anything she feels could get me in trouble. She doesn’t understand that I played everything by the book. Despite all my internal conflict, I actually did nothing wrong. It’s extremely kind of her to try to make me sound as good as possible though.
“Alright,” I cut in, when Collin keeps drilling her at the fifty-five minute mark. “Let’s let Ms. Shelby call her family.”
“Sure,” Collins smiles at me, eyes teasing, “you want to take the lead on that, Agent Johnson?”
I’m gonna punch him.
“What do you think, Supervisory Special Agent Collin Fox?”
We’re in a stare-off, Collin amused, me annoyed, when Iris laughs behind us. We both turn.“Y’all two sound like my brothers. I can take care of things on my own. You two talk. I need to wash my face.”
“Ask Ronda at the front for some clothes. She can get you something to change into until you get home.”
“Thank you, sir.” Then Iris turns to me with pink cheeks. “I’ll see ya again, right?”
“Yes, Ms. Shelby, I’ll make sure I say bye.”
“Iris…” she mutters, running out of the room.
Collin waits for the clicking of her boots to fade before he turns to me with a shit-eating grin. He crosses his arms over his chest and lets his smile spread further.
“So, you haven’t been telling me everything, have you, Agent Johnson?”
I stand from my chair and push it in.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, asshole.”
He pushes to his feet as well. “Derek!” he teases, mocking her accent.
“Drop it. She’s got it in her head that I’m a hero.”
That makes the humor die off Collin’s face. “You are. You got her out of there. Got the criminals behind bars.”
“Yep.”
“Derek, sit.”
This time it’s not a joke, so I listen like the good little agent I am, unable to make eye contact.
“What’s going on with you? Why didn’t you tell me Iris was attached to you?”Uh, ‘cause I’m kind of attached to her, too? “I feel shitty for tearing apart families I connected with, against my better judgement, and because if I told you about her while whining about Lacey, you’d probably hire me a hooker.”
He gives me a sad smile. “I’m still trying to figure out what agency is best for you in my head right now.”
“Are you? Any ideas?”
“No, but I’ll get back to you.”
“Great, thanks. For the record, I have gotten laid.”
“Look, personally, I’m hurt you thought I’d really judge you if you came to me with this. I’m your friend first. I’m disappointed in you.”
“Sorry, Dad.”
He rolls his eyes. I’ve called him that since we were kids. He’s always been older and more mature than me.
“As your boss, I should have pulled you. I wanted these guy so badly…” He runs a hand through his hair. “I put you at risk, mentally. I am willing to turn myself in on this for you. I pushed you too far for selfish gain.”“I’d never ask you to do that. Hell, I don’t want you to do that.”
Collin takes a deep breath. “We have to finish this up. Go fetch your little country girl. I’m gonna go talk to Sven about his childhood and being kidnapped. I need to see if he’s gonna try for insanity. Again. He pleaded insanity when arrested a few years ago. That’s how he met his wife.”
Collin frowns deeply. After what happened to him, which is not my place to tell, mistreatment of women makes him want to kill a shithead. He doesn’t understand how someone could take advantage of a good woman. It completely boggles his mind.
“Kidnapping? And wait, what about his wife?”
“It’s tragic, actually. He was kidnapped as a child and raised by horrible people who were later found dead. Sven popped up on the scene years later under Adam Ruston, in the mafia. As for his wife, she “left” her job at the treatment center right when he did. Coincidence? I don’t think so. I think he kidnapped his pretty little wife and she fell in love with him in the process somehow. Of course, she’d never admit it now, so I have nothing to go on.”
“I didn’t get enough personal time with Sven to confirm or deny this. I spent most of my time with Frances, Adam, Lacey, or her daughter.”
“I know.”
“Well, good luck with that. I’m gonna go find Iris.”
“I’m sure she’s waiting with bated breath.”
I grab the nearest pen and chuck it at his head.
“Quit being an ass.”
“P.S. Don’t make me suspend you. Take your personal shit outside the bureau.”He winks.
“I’m not doing anything with Iris.”
“Sure. Remember, outside the office.”
Then he shoves me outside the door, leaving me with definite off-the-clock thoughts of Iris, me, and that damn country accent of hers.
I walk out the doors feeling lighter than I have in a long while, thanks to Collin and Iris. I’m even semi-smiling. Until I realize what a mistake leaving the safety of that room was.
Sven and Adam are being transferred in handcuffs, but my eyes go
straight to Lacey. She bolts to her feet, but wobbles under the weight of her grief. Her boxing coach has to steady her. Despite his large frame, there’s a depth of sadness in his eyes, all for her. Maria and him make eye contact, but all that’s shared between the two of the them is concern for their friends. I try to swallow the lump in my throat, but fail.
“Little dove,” Adam calls for his wife. His face is a cross between forcefully stern and soft… for her.
Lacey lets out a choked sob and shakes her head, backing away.
“Come here, sweetie.” Even his voice is sad now. “I know you’re strong enough.”
The men transporting him look to me, wondering if I’ll allow them to interact. I wave my hand. Give them as much time as they need.
While Lacey struggles with what she’s gonna do, I look over at Rose and Sven. Rose is already sobbing on Sven’s shoulder. He’s touching her as best as he can with handcuffs. It’s a cross of comfort and touching her ass, like he needs his fill before prison. Somehow, despite the crassness of it, it’s tender in a way. The way he does it, I guess. Who knows? They’re strange.
“I love you, little Rose. You know that, right?”
“No,” she cries, snot dripping down her pretty face. Sven smirks and tilts her chin up.
“Yes, you do. You trust me?”
“No.” He chuckles now. He leans into her ear and whispers something I can’t make out. Whatever it is, her eyes widen and she stiffens. The other agents look to me again. Right now, I don’t care if he’s telling her his damn escape plan. I refuse to cut Lacey’s time with her husband short, and I’ll do that if I interrupt Rose and her husband.I give one quick glance at Frances, who’s just been ushered in. He glares at me, hard.
“Come here,” he growls. I raise an eyebrow. I don’t have to do shit for him. He’s not one of the people I feel guilty about. Although I will say that he’s a complicated fellow. He’s still done plenty of bad to warrant prison.
“It’s about what only you know,” he grits out through clenched teeth.
I furrow my eyebrows, then it clicks. Marley. I sigh and walk over, crossing my arms over my chest.
