by Susan Hayes
“You have to let go. I’m giving you a direct order. Release me, right now,” she’d uttered the command with complete confidence that he would obey.
“No.”
His refusal caused a flutter of panic deep in her gut. From her first day she had been told that no cyborg could refuse a direct order. Not even to save their own life. “Let me go.”
Instead of releasing her, his arms had tightened, locking her in place. “I don’t want to. I want to hold you and tell you what Dash is dreaming about. I know, because I can see it. Whatever you did to us, it’s working. I can see his dreams, and they're all about you.”
“Me? He’s dreaming about me, and you can see it?” she asked, so distracted by his revelation she momentarily forgot he had refused a direct order.
“I can see and hear it like it’s really happening. We’ve got you pinned between us while we strip off your uniform. Kissing, touching, and tasting every part of you. You’re moaning our names, and it sounds good. I need to know what you taste like. Will you give me that much?”
Duty warred with want, and for the first time in her life, duty lost. Looking back, she still couldn’t understand what had possessed her to trust him. But in all the nights since, she had never regretted her choice. “Yes.”
He groaned and turned her in his arms so that she was facing him. The moment she looked into his eyes, she knew. His hazel eyes gleamed with desire and so much more than that. This was no machine. He was a man. A man who wanted her.
His hand cupped her chin, tipping her head back as he lowered his lips to hers. “You’re…” she whispered, too stunned to even finish her sentence.
“I am.” He kissed her then, gathering her into his arms so that she could feel every inch of him pressed against her. He speared his fingers into her hair, his lips demanding as he devoured her mouth with his.
Behind them, Dash groaned. There was a note of hunger to it that made Lieksa’s pulse quicken.
“I should check on him,” she whispered, grasping at the last shreds of her control.
“No need. He’s fine,” Mack told her, a hint of laughter in his voice.
“Hello, angel. Am I still dreaming?” Dash murmured, moving in behind her and capturing her between the two of them exactly the way Mack had described.
“If you are, then you better not wake up anytime soon, my friend. I’m not ready to let her go.” Mack lifted his head to smile at Dash, the harsh set of his mouth softening for the first time, making him appear so much more human.
“Who said we’re letting her go?”
“Uh, says me.” She’d finally found enough of her scattered wits to be able to speak.
Dash buried his face in the crook of her neck before answering. “Nu-uh. You’ve been bossing us around since we got here. It’s our turn.”
“I can’t. I need to understand. You’ve got free will? Both of you? How long have you been like this?”
Instead of answering her, Dash spun her around to face him and silenced her with a kiss so fierce she could still feel the heat of it, even now.
An annoying chime began to sound, tearing her out of her daydreams with a strident alert that she had nearly exhausted her supply of hot water. The caress of water and steam was empty after the remembrances of their touch, and she shut off the shower with a tired sigh. It was a memory she revisited often, but it always ended the same way. Soul-searing kisses, and their promise that when the war was over, they would find her. But that wasn’t what happened. To protect their secret, she sent them away. She’d had to. What they had revealed to her while they were drugged and vulnerable would get them killed, or worse. If their new upgrades continued to perform beyond the design team’s expectations, Mack and Dash would have become test subjects under constant surveillance. It would only be a matter of time before the tests uncovered their secret.
Cyborgs were never supposed to become fully self-aware. They were soldiers in a bloodless war, manufactured pawns to be moved across a battlefield, nothing more. If the corporations learned that Dash and Mack were not only aware, but capable of defying orders, they’d tear them apart to find out what went wrong, and then they’d hunt down and destroy any other cyborgs who showed the same ability. She couldn’t let that happen.
She filed a report declaring the upgrades a failure and ordered both men back to active status. The research and development teams were constantly testing new upgrades; some worked, some didn’t. They’d just try again. No one would question her findings.
It defied logic, but the safest place for Mack and Dash was back in battle, where at least they had a chance at survival. The hardest part was not getting to see them again. She couldn’t risk it. There could be no goodbyes or explanations that could raise suspicions. They had to go, quickly, before anyone suspected. It was the hardest choice she made that day. Resigning her job and walking away from her life’s work didn’t hurt as much as leaving behind the only men to ever touch her heart.
Until today, she thought it had all been for nothing. That they had died in the Resource Wars without ever getting a chance to be free. Now, she knew differently, but she also knew how they felt about her. She’d heard the bitter anger in Mack’s voice when he’d told the doctor he didn’t want a tech working on Dash. She’d seen the accusation and judgment in their eyes. They blamed her, and maybe they were right to.
She couldn’t regret what she had done, though.
They might hate her for the rest of their lives, but at least they had lives to live.
CHAPTER THREE
Dash had been stuck in medical for two days now, and he was about to lose what was left of his mind. His body was healed, but neither the doctor nor Lieksa would release him until they were certain that his implants were all fully functional. He always thought it would be fun to have two women team up on him while he was in bed. Turned out, the reality wasn’t anything close to the fantasy.
“Please tell me that’s the last of the tests, and I can get out of here now,” he said to Lieksa as she signed off on yet another form on her data tablet.
She glanced up, her ice-blue eyes gleaming with amusement for a moment. “Not yet. And if you don’t quit moving around, I swear I’m going to put you in restraints. Be patient, my patient.”
“Did you just offer to tie me up? I’m game if you are.”
She blushed and shook her head. “No, I didn’t. Well, I did, but that’s not what I meant, and you know it.”
“I live in hope,” he replied with a wink. With little else to do, he had spent the last few days working on charming Lieksa out from behind her wall of cool, professional reserve. She seemed determined to keep her distance, which wasn’t easy given the amount of time they spent together. Tests took time to run, and if she got a result she didn’t like, she immediately ran a retest. Dr. Jefferies was almost as bad, but at least the medi-bots in his blood were doing most of her job for her. She would come in, look over the readouts, tell him to rest, and leave again.
Lieksa’s reaction to his last comment was instantaneous. Her eyes darkened to a stormy blue, as if a cloud passed over the sun. All the light and warmth in her expression vanished. “You shouldn’t say things you don’t mean. I’m aware that flirting is encoded into your DNA, but I know how you two feel about me, Dash. Mack’s made it very clear.”
He winced. Mack’s concern over the ambush, the rising body count of their informants, and a potential leak in their task force had his partner in a black mood, and he was taking out his frustration on everyone around him, including Lieksa. Confidentiality forbade them from explaining what was going on, so it made sense she thought his partner’s frustration and anger was directed at her. He was going to have to tell Mack to get a grip on his grumpy self before he ruined any chance they might have with Lieksa. If they had any chance at all, that is. It was too soon to tell. There had been no time to talk to her about anything important, yet. He was busy getting better, while Mack was running their task force singlehandedly.
Four months after the first overdose, the team was no closer to ending the influx of crimson onto the Drift. They knew who was responsible, and their mandate had been expanded to include the apprehension and disbanding of a gang of thugs and drug runners known as the Drojo Cartel. This last raid should have put a few nails in the gang’s coffin, but instead, it had been an ambush that could have taken down the entire team. Someone had targeted the task force, someone with inside information, and they had no idea who the traitor was.
“Mack’s not angry with you. He’s dealing with a lot right now. Two of his team were injured, and now, either all of our informants have suddenly developed pharma addictions, or someone is killing off our sources by overdosing them on crimson. It’s a bad situation, and I’m not there to help him.”
She scoffed. “You’re wrong. He won’t even speak to me now that you’re recovering. All I get from him are dirty looks. I heard him talking about techs the night I came here to treat you. He doesn’t trust any of us, most especially not me.”
Frustration at their situation put an edge to his next words. “Can you blame him? You don’t know what it was like for us. You were our angel of mercy. You had our lives in your hands, and suddenly you were gone. Thanks to the drugs you dosed us with we both fraxxed up and revealed something we shouldn’t have. Then, before we can talk to you about it, we’re back on active duty. We had no idea what was happening or why. Those first few days we were half convinced you were going to turn us in.”
Lieksa recoiled as if he’d slapped her. “I would never betray you. I wanted to believe that you shared your secret with me because you trusted me…and maybe even wanted me enough to take that chance. Turns out that wasn’t it at all. You two were just high and horny. My mistake.”
She turned on her heel and fled the room, but not before he saw the shimmer of tears in her eyes. Re’veth, so much for fixing things. He’d just doused their chances in rocket fuel and set it on fire.
* * * *
Lieksa pulled herself together as she left Dash’s room. She was not going to lose it in the middle of the medical center. This wasn’t the time or the place, and she’d be damned if she was going to let anyone see how much their rejection hurt.
Zale had contacted her this morning, and she couldn’t help but recall what he’d said. Officially, he had called to let her know that the higher-ups wanted her back in her workshop. The backlog of work was growing, and they expected her to finish up with Dash soon. Unofficially, he was worried about her and said as much. It was a vid call, so there was no way to hide her fatigue. He’d ended the call with a bit of unsolicited advice, and she could still hear his deep voice as it replayed on an endless loop through her mind. “Given your past, I don’t think spending time with cyborgs is the best thing for you.”
Yesterday, she would have hoped he was wrong. That maybe she could finally move past what she had done, and what she had lost. Today? Today, she agreed with Zale. She’d spent years trying to atone for what she’d done to the cyborgs. It didn’t matter that she hadn’t known her subjects were sentient. Guilt still gnawed at her. She had hoped that she could explain her actions to Mack and Dash. She wanted their understanding, but all she got was anger. Maybe that was all that she deserved.
“Everything okay?” someone asked.
She snapped her head around to see that Len Daniels, the other Corp-Sec officer who had been injured the same night as Dash, was standing at the door of his room at the end of the hall. Len was human, which meant that despite the medical center’s advanced technology, his recovery would be slow. He probably shouldn’t be out of bed yet, but it wasn’t her place to tell him so.
“It’s fine,” she said, hoping he didn’t call her on the obvious lie.
“Nothing’s wrong with Dash, is it? You just look a little stressed is all, and I know he was hurt pretty bad. You’ve been in and out of his room a lot. You his girlfriend?”
His last question caught her off guard “Girlfriend? Veth, no. Nothing like that. I’m the technician who repaired his damaged implants, that’s all.”
Len’s ginger-colored brows raised in surprise. “I didn’t know there was anyone around who could do that kind of work. Guess it was a good thing for him you were here, huh?”
“The universe was looking out for him. It sounds like it was watching over you, too. You took a blast to the chest, and you’re still with us.” She didn’t want to talk about Dash right now. He was probably wishing it had been anyone else in the galaxy who had shown up to repair him.
Len nodded and gently touched a finger to the thick bandages she could see under his shirt. “The doc said I was lucky. My body armor took the brunt of the damage. Still, it’s going to be a while before I get out of here.” He gave her a lopsided smile. “Have pity on a wounded man and come visit me sometimes? The company of a pretty woman would do wonders for my morale.”
“You want me to visit you?” she asked in surprise.
“Uh huh. You could call it your good deed for the week. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but this place isn’t all that entertaining. We could talk, play cards, a game, whatever you want. It would be great to have someone to talk to. Please?”
It was nice to hear that someone actually want her company. Dash and Mack certainly didn’t. She was going to be around the med center for a day or two more, anyway. She saw no reason to say no. “Okay. I’ll even see if I can find a deck of cards. I’m Lieksa, by the way.”
Len grinned. “Great. I’m Len, but I bet you already knew that. Time for me to get back to bed. If the doc catches me on my feet, I’ll get another lecture. Come see me anytime.”
He winked, then looked past her. “Hey, Mack. Come to check up on your partner?”
“Came to check on both of you. Do I need to order you to get your ass back to bed? We need you back on active duty, Len. Rest up.”
“Yessir.” Len snapped off a jaunty salute. “I’ll see you later, Lieksa?”
“Later,” she agreed.
Len went back into his room, leaving her alone with Mack. She turned and found him glowering at her. “Dash is—“ she started to speak, but he raised his hand.
“How do you know Len?”
“I don’t. I ran into him when I left Dash’s room. He seems nice. I guess he doesn’t know how you and Dash feel about me. Once he does, I’m sure he’ll start giving me the cold shoulder.”
“You have no idea how I feel about you. We haven’t had a chance to talk yet,” Mack pointed out.
His tone was softer than she expected given his furrowed brow and the set of his jaw, but it didn’t change anything. She knew how they felt. “Dash already said everything there was to say.”
“He talked to you already? Veth, we agreed we’d do it together.”
Mack scrubbed a hand over his face. He hadn’t shaved yet today. His uniform was fresh, but the man wearing it wasn’t. Whatever he’d been doing between visits to the medical center, he hadn’t been spending it taking care of himself. Not that she should care, but somehow, she still did.
“I guess he didn’t think you needed to be there,” she said, forcing a casual note into her voice.
“Apparently not.” He scowled. “Wait, if he talked to you already, why were you out here flirting with Len?”
“Flirting?” She flung the word back at him dripping in venom. “I wasn’t flirting with anyone. That was how normal people communicate with each other. We smile. We say nice things. We don’t growl insults and bark orders. And even if I was flirting, why would you care? You two never cared about me. I was a drug-fueled mistake you both regret.”
Fury darkened Mack’s eyes and made
him look downright terrifying, but she didn’t move away. She was too angry to be intimidated.
“What the fraxx did he say to you?” he demanded. “Stay here. I mean it, Lieksa. Don’t go anywhere until I’ve talked to Dash.”
“And there you go again, barking orders at me. The war’s over, Mack. You’re not a soldier anymore, and I never was.”
She turned her back, hoping to make it clear she was done with this conversation. They had said everything there was to say already.
A door opened, and she knew he was going in to see Dash. She held her breath, waiting for the door to close, but instead, Mack spoke again.
“Lieksa, please don’t leave until we’ve had a chance to talk.”
She stayed quiet, too confused to answer. The door slid shut again a few seconds later, and she released the breath she had been holding. He was gone for now.
“I didn’t know he even knew the meaning of the word. I’ve never heard him say please before,” Alyson’s voice broke the silence that filled the corridor.
Lieksa turned to face the doctor, who was outside breakroom door with a fresh cup of coffee in her hand. “Sorry about that.”
“Don’t apologize. This is a place of healing, and judging by what I just heard, I’d say you three still need a fair bit.”
“I’m not sure there’s enough medical know-how in the universe for that.”
“In my experience, everyone and everything heals, eventually. It just takes the right treatment.” Alyson glanced around as if confirming they were alone. “And speaking of treatments, I was hoping to talk to you about an issue some of my cyborg patients are dealing with. I know you specialized in cybernetic systems, but did you ever come across anything about cyborg fertility?”
Mack and Dash weren’t the only cyborgs on the Drift. Alyson was doing all she could to learn how to treat them, and Lieksa had already agreed to teach her. Someone needed to look out for the cyborgs, and experience had shown that the corporations couldn’t be trusted to put anyone’s best interests ahead of their own. Lieksa didn’t think twice before answering. “Fertility? Not really. But if you tell me what the problem is, maybe I can find a way to help.”
