by Laura Fang
My wolf liked it when I did this, at least. It wanted me to protect my mate. It didn’t understand that we lived in the city, and we had to follow laws and protocols. It came from a different world and carried all of its original instincts. And even though I tried to be a pretty rational person, those instincts inevitably influenced me.
Well, I had to do something until I saw Tess again. I went right to my bed and passed out. I was going to need the rest.
7
Tess
Just as I had predicted, my life in the office was going down the drain. Leo was giving me ridiculously bad assignments, like crime reports and movie listings. He barely even assigned me any articles. When other people brought this up in meetings, he explained that she didn’t want me to overexert myself. There was no explanation of why exactly I wasn’t supposed to overexert myself. I couldn’t protest without looking like I was trying to undermine him. They all ate it right up.
After our conversation on his first day, he hadn’t said anything about us going on a date again, for which I was thankful. But the not so subtle pressure was even worse. I could feel my mind melting as I tediously typed up the movie listings, and my blood boiled when I saw the movie reviews go to other writers. Shawna had often let me have first pick. It was terribly unfair. I knew the crime reports were important—and I wouldn’t have minded doing them if my workload had been more balanced—but the way it was going, I was never going to progress in my career if I was working for Leo.
At least, because I had less demanding work, I could spend more time looking for other opportunities. I shamelessly spent my lunch hour browsing job listings on my phone. Cecelia had promised to get me started on her work soon, and in the meantime I had been able to make some other inquiries. Even though my current job quality was deteriorating, I felt good about making plans for the future.
The main problem I had, though, was that I couldn’t look for journalism jobs, not now, anyway. The journalism scene in a city the size of this one was small. If I was looking for journalism jobs, it would get right back to Leo and the other staff. I had to look for freelance writing gigs or content writing jobs for now.
Later that afternoon, I received an email from a small food and culture website that was interested in hiring me. I had to sneak out and take a walk around the block for the phone interview, but in the end, they sounded like they were into me, so that was a relief. This wasn’t going to be as bad as I had thought. I could make it work.
But I wasn’t going to be able to pay the rent with what I had lined up so far. I had to stick it out here a little longer. And to do that, I had to appease Leo. I had the sneaking suspicion that if I kept stalling, or if I rejected him outright, he’d get me fired. That would seriously mess up my chances of getting any other journalism jobs in the city. It could put an end to my journalism career entirely, unless I moved somewhere else.
I was forced to make a decision when he called me into his office again. He had that same smile, the one which I was growing to hate. It was incredibly smug, like he knew he had already won. He had, or so he thought.
“Have you made up your mind?” Leo asked confidently, like he knew what the answer was going to be. And he did.
“Okay, Leo,” I said. “I’ll go on a date. Just to try it out,” I added, putting my hands up. I didn’t want to seem like I was enthusiastic about this plan.
He grinned, overjoyed. “Wonderful. I’ve already picked out the place and everything. So meet me here this weekend…”
He wrote down the name of a restaurant I’d never heard of. “Got it,” I said. “I’ll see you there.”
When I walked out, I felt a little better. I had no intention of actually seeing Leo past this one date. I was hoping that it would buy me a little more time to find other jobs. I could tell him I was busy, or make something else up, if he wanted a second date.
Pleased with my decision, I went back to my work. I was feeling a little more optimistic and went at the movie listings with new energy. But that optimism was destined to be short-lived.
* * *
When I showed up at the restaurant on Friday, I felt like I could handle whatever came my way. I could even give Leo a first kiss if he really wanted one—I hoped. Kissing guys wasn’t too weird; I had done it before, anyway, back in high school.
Leo looked quite nice; he had obviously dressed up for the occasion. If I had been straight, I probably would have been into him. Until he opened his mouth, that is.
As it turned out, I got to see a completely different side of Leo. He was almost cheerful. The surliness was completely gone. If he behaved like this on a regular basis, I thought, my life would be so much more pleasant. But I couldn’t tell if it was an act or not. It was hard to know with him.
“Um, this place looks nice,” I said. Wow, I was more nervous about this than I had thought. I was putting on an act myself.
“I always thought it was the perfect date spot,” Leo said.
We went inside and got seated. I was still stunned by how he was behaving. He was almost like a normal, reasonable person, not one who was determined to treat me like shit. We didn’t talk about work at all; instead, we talked about our families, personal interests, goals, stuff like that. I was starting to see him more as a real person and not a surly coworker. Maybe this is the authentic Leo, I thought. I wondered what could have happened to him to make him so prickly and manipulative.
“So I had to stop playing sports because I broke my leg,” he said, trailing off sadly. “When I have kids, I’d love to coach a team for them, but I don’t want to be one of those dads living vicariously through his kids.”
I shuddered. My mom had been a little like that—because she hadn’t had a good education, she had pushed me to go to college, even though I hadn’t been sure it was what I wanted to do—I had been considering trade school. Of course, it had worked out well for me in the end, but we had fought bitterly over it.
“I think if you’re careful and self aware, you’ll be an okay dad,” I said. The conversations we were having were all very well, but there was the fact that I didn’t—and wasn’t going to—feel anything for him. It was hard to reconcile the way he had treated me these past few months with the way he was treating me now. He didn’t think I could get over it overnight, did he? Though if he believed that I, a lesbian, was capable of going straight only for him, he was pretty delusional.
“Thanks,” Leo said, smiling. Fuck, I should haven’t said that, I thought. We shouldn’t be talking about parenting, or anything relationship related. I had to change the subject.
“So, uh, did you have any pets?”
“I’ve always had cats,” he said, “which is why I call myself Leo. I started doing it in preschool, when we got our first cat…”
It was easy to keep him happy because all I had to do was ask him questions. Like most people, he loved talking about himself. But as we finished up our entrees, I was getting more and more nervous about how to leave the date on a positive note without having to commit to anything.
“Did you have any pets?”
“Me? Umm, no, I didn’t. Actually no, I had a goldfish in elementary school that I won from a fair. When he died my mom refused to buy me a new one.”
“That’s sad,” he said.
I shrugged. “It was what it was.”
“Do you want to get dessert?” he asked, taking the smaller menu and flipping through it. “They seem to have some nice cakes. We could split one.”
“Sure,” I said. Anything to give me more time to think of what to do.
It took them a while to bring us our slice of strawberry shortcake, and while Leo talked, my mind was running through my options. I was starting to regret my decision to go on this date. He didn’t seem suspicious yet, but he would when I refused to kiss him.
I had thought I’d be able to go through with it, but I was wrong. For one thing, I had forgotten that it could very well be considered cheating. I’d have to tell Cecelia I kiss
ed Leo, if I told her about this date. Even if I felt up to it, I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t cheat on her with Leo, of all people.
“The cake is amazing,” said Leo. “Have some more.”
I was losing my appetite but I took another piece to mollify him. “It’s great, you’re right.”
“What’s wrong?” he asked, furrowing his brow. “You seem preoccupied.”
“Oh, it’s nothing,” I said hastily. “Just tired.”
Leo seemed disappointed. “Then I don’t suppose you’d want to come back home with me, would you? That’s okay, we can do that next time.”
Bullet dodged, I thought. “Sure,” I said, smiling uneasily.
But even as we left the restaurant and stood outside, poised to go our separate ways, I had to face the last obstacle. He took my face quickly, pressing his lips against mine. I was so shocked that I pulled away.
He didn’t seem too happy with me. “What was that about?”
“Oh, sorry, I um, I got startled.”
He frowned, unconvinced. Before I could protest, he was kissing me again, his tongue forcefully prying my lips apart and plunging into my mouth. I froze for a couple of seconds, shocked that he had dared to go so far, then I shook him off.
“I just—I don’t think I’m ready…” I said weakly.
“You’re going to have to be ready at some point,” he said darkly. I knew what his underlying threat was.
I didn’t know what to say. “I guess I’ll see you on Monday.” I was itching to get out of there and be back at home in my bed, all alone. Or maybe with Cecelia. Anywhere but here.
“Sure,” he said. “Goodnight.”
I walked in the opposite direction from Leo, even though it meant I’d have to take a more roundabout way to the bus stop. He was clearly seething with anger, his face contorted with rage. He wasn’t the type to explode with emotion, but I knew he’d find some way to passive aggressively take it out on me in the coming week. I absolutely had to find a new job, and quick.
I was feeling so freaked out and miserable that I went with my first impulse, which was to call Cecelia. She picked up on the first ring.
“Hey,” I said.
“Hey. You sound upset. What happened?” Cecelia’s voice was anxious. I remembered the last time I called her like this, it had been because of Fiona’s threat. I felt bad for making her worry.
“Oh, nothing too terrible. Are you free now?”
“Sure. Come over to my place.”
One bus ride and a short walk later, I was curled up on the couch next to Cecelia. “So…” I started, unsure of how to phrase it. “I decided to go on a date with Leo to see if it would shut him up.” I was worried about how Cecelia would take this. I mean, she knew I wasn’t the least bit interested in him, but still.
“And what happened?”
“It was an okay outing, actually, until the end. He tried kissing me and I stopped him. But then he tried again and he went a little too far before I could stop him. I felt kind of violated, to be honest. And when he could tell I wasn’t into it, he not so subtly threatened me.” I slumped against her, looking at the floor. I couldn’t face her.
She wrapped her arms around me and hugged me. “Tess, I’m sorry to hear that. What he did was wrong. I’m not mad at you at all, just so you know. I’m worried that you have to deal with this.”
I looked up at her. “Really?”
“Really. I mean, he practically assaulted you. It wasn’t right. Have you had any luck with finding other jobs?”
“I got a couple of interviews, and a couple of freelance assignments,” I said, glad to be focusing on a plan to move forward. “But it’s going slowly. Soon enough, Leo is going to get me fired somehow and then I’ll be really fucked.”
“Well, I did say I couldn’t offer you full-time work… But if you’re interested in doing other stuff around the office, working at Solace could get you enough to pay for rent. I know it’s not ideal, but I want you to know that I’m willing and able to help you. You’re not going to be homeless.” She squeezed me even tighter, making me feel safe in her arms.
“Why are you doing this?” I asked.
“I told you before, a good alpha takes care of her mate. That’s how it is, and how it should be. My offer will remain open.”
“Okay,” I said. “I’ll see what else I can scrounge up this week.” As much as I appreciated Cecelia’s offer, I was reluctant to tie myself to her like that. What if we broke up? I’d be homeless again. I didn’t want to have to rely on her. I had relied on my mother before, and that didn’t do me any good. Unfortunately, I didn’t have much choice right now.
She gave me a kiss on the forehead and I snuggled up against her more. But because I was sitting on her lap, my squirming was making her aroused. I could feel her heat under me. Naturally, I squirmed even more, turning it into something of a game.
“I see what you’re doing,” said Cecelia.
“I’m not doing anything,” I said.
“Oh really? Well, I guess we can continue to sit here then.”
We sat in silence for a minute more, during which I tried wiggling in her lap to get her more aroused. She steadfastly sat still until I reached my hand down and fondled her through the fabric of her jeans.
“Okay, fine, you win,” she said, and I laughed. She turned me around and started kissing me. I wholeheartedly gave in, letting myself melt in her arms. I wrapped my hands around her, hugging her close to me. It felt so good to be open with someone I trusted so much. I felt like everything would be okay if I stuck with Cecelia.
I broke away from the kiss. “Let’s get naked.”
“You’re sure?” she said in a low voice.
I nodded. “Let’s do it.”
Now that I’d given her the green light, she was invigorated. She brought new energy to her kissing and ran her hands all over my body, lighting me on fire. I moaned into the kiss, hoping that she would slip her hands down my pants and start fondling me. I wanted nothing more than to be naked with her right now.
I started unbuttoning her shirt, pressing myself against her breasts. It took some maneuvering, but soon enough, we were both naked. A sheen of sweat was already forming on my skin. We descended into pleasure and spent a while there.
We floated back down together, panting heavily. I was so overwhelmed that I couldn’t even talk. My body was still twitching with the aftershocks and flickers of frisson went up and down my spine.
That was so incredible,” she said breathily.
“Seriously,” I replied. I scooted closer to her. I could smell her sweat and her musk and her sex and I breathed deeply.
She rolled over so that we were face to face. Our noses were almost touching. It was a little unnerving to me to be so close to her and to be making eye contact. It was an unexpectedly intense feeling, one that I wasn’t used to.
“Tess, I love you,” she said softly.
“I love you too.” The answer came automatically. I hadn’t even needed to think about it. Of course I loved her —anything else was unthinkable. And I would do anything to be with her.
She smiled and wrapped her arms around me for a hug. Even though we were sweaty and the room was a little humid, I wasn’t complaining. I loved being close to her. I didn’t want to pull away, even though my skin was sticky. Listening to her heart beating and the sound of her breathing, calm and measured, was perfect.
It was hard for me to believe that just a few weeks ago, I hadn’t even thought I could trust someone like this. But it had happened. The future had happened to me and I hadn’t dreamed it was even possible. With his patient demeanor and steadfast loyalty, Cecelia had managed to break down the walls around my heart.
I ended up sleeping over. We woke up late on Saturday morning, lazing around after taking a shower together. Eventually I decided I had to head home so I could finish up some work. I got most of my assignments done during the time I was at the office, but I could claim a few overtime hours here an
d there by taking work home. I wasn’t one to turn down the extra money.
But before I left, we made plans for the following evening. It was like a dam had been broken, and now I wanted to spend every waking and sleeping hour with her. We were inseparable. This was what love was really like, I thought, spacing out while I sat on the bus. I had had boyfriends in high school, but the feelings I had for them—which I wasn’t sure were even romantic—were nothing compared to this.
I got off the bus, feeling refreshed from all the relaxation I had had with Cecelia. The bad date with Leo seemed like a distant memory now, and I was no longer worried about the situation at the office. Even if he fired me first thing Monday morning, I knew I had nothing to worry about. Cecelia was on my team now.
As I walked up to my door, I saw something that looked like a dead cat on my front doorstep. Gross, I thought. Maybe it was a squirrel or something, considering how fluffy and gray it was. There was a weird odor emanating from it as well—I could detect it at this distance thanks to my shifter sense of smell. I wondered why in the world a cat or squirrel or whatever it was would come decide to die on my doorstep.
When I got close, I saw blood, dried and smeared on the concrete. That was definitely weird. And then I saw that it wasn’t a dead animal at all, but part of one. I didn’t want to pick it up so I found a stick and poked at it.
When I figured it what it was, thanks to the piece of bone sticking out from one end, my blood ran cold.
It was a wolf tail.
Someone had severed the entire tail from what was presumably a living wolf, and deposited it on my doorstep. There was no mistaking the threat, because I was a shifter. It had to have been Fiona—who else was even capable of such a thing? And where had she gotten the tail from? It wasn’t hers, was it? Shifters had incredible healing powers, but they couldn’t grow back a full tail. It was horrible to think that she had mutilated herself, but even worse to consider the possibility that she had stolen it from someone else. A wolf without a tail was a sad sight.
