“Yes, I suppose so, too.” Damara was surprised it’d taken her so long to conceive, but then, she had no idea how long her mother had waited before she conceived her.
“I don’t mean to pry, but since we are friends,” Celia began, “is Anthony the only gentleman you’ve been with?”
Damara’s face warmed. The question seemed awfully personal. Was this the kind of things friends discussed?
As if she read her mind, Celia said, “I haven’t been with a gentleman. Well, not completely. There was one I snuck a few kisses and touches with when no one was around. We even removed some clothing. But that was it. We only did it because we were bored. Afterwards, I realized if I’d gotten caught, it would have been a horrible scandal. I didn’t do anything like that again. But sometimes,” she shrugged, “well, there are moments where we’re weak. Did you have weak moments like that before you met my brother?”
“Well, I never felt any kind of weakness before I met your brother.”
Which was true. Damara hadn’t been tempted at all to do anything she shouldn’t with Lord Comwright. But that didn’t stop him from trying to take her virginity. But she didn’t want to tell Celia that. Even if Celia was her friend, that was far more information than she wanted to disclose to anyone else.
“Of course, gentlemen can also be enthusiastic about doing certain things before they’re married, and it doesn’t take much prompting to get them to comply with us.” Celia leaned closer to her. “Did you and Anthony do anything interesting together before you married?”
“Well, I…I noticed he was attracted to me.” She cleared her throat and broke eye contact with her. “So I let my breast brush his arm, and I kissed him.”
“And?”
“And that was it. We married after that. I’m sorry, Celia. I know it was manipulative for me to do those things.”
Celia frowned. “All you did was brush your breast against his arm and kiss him, and he married you?”
Was Celia disappointed? Had she wanted Damara to tell her more? Not sure what else she could add, Damara ventured, “I know our marriage was a hasty one. I’m the reason it was rushed. I wanted to marry him. I wouldn’t have acted like a whore otherwise.”
“A whore? You think you acted like a whore?”
“I tempted him with pleasures of the flesh. Isn’t that what a whore does?”
“A whore would do a lot more than what you did.” Celia settled back in the seat then glanced back at her. “You really didn’t do anything else? You didn’t show him anything? Or let him touch anything important?”
“No. I promise, Celia. I didn’t arouse him further than that.”
“I don’t understand. Plenty of gentlemen do more than that and think nothing of it. Why would that be enough for him to marry you?”
Damara couldn’t mention the money. Under no circumstances was she going to mention that, but that was the missing piece Celia was probably searching for.
“I hope you don’t hate me,” she told Celia. “I’m telling the truth when I say I love your brother. I only want to make him happy. I’ll never be with anyone else, and I’ll be a good mother to his children.”
The carriage stopped.
“Are we still friends?” Damara asked.
Celia, still seeming baffled, offered her a smile. “Yes, we’re still friends.”
Relieved, Damara relaxed.
The footman opened the carriage door, and Celia stepped out of it. Damara followed. The townhouse seemed like any other, but she noted that two ladies going up the steps were just as dressed up as she and Celia were.
“I told you it was necessary to wear only the best attire to Lady Eloise’s residence,” Celia whispered as she led her to the entrance. “You’re very fortunate to be here today. All the people watching us are wishing they had someone like me to invite them here. I can tell Miss Carlton over there is dying of envy right now.”
Damara followed Celia’s gaze and saw a lady about their age who had stopped to let them pass by.
“It’s a lovely day, isn’t it?” Celia called out. “There’s a Ladies of Grace social engagement today.”
Miss Carlton rolled her eyes but didn’t reply.
“She couldn’t get in,” Celia told Damara, her voice loud enough for Miss Carlton to hear. “The poor dear lacks anything interesting to say.”
Damara winced. Did Celia really have to say that right in front of the lady? And in such a loud voice? Had Damara not been so stunned, she might have warned Celia that Miss Carlton could hear her. But she couldn’t bring herself to do it. Celia would probably take it as a criticism.
Celia waited until they were out of the lady’s hearing to add, “Some ladies will never fit in, no matter how hard they try. It’s sad. But then, it’s necessary. What good is being with the influential crowd if everyone belonged there?”
By the time they reached the doorway, Damara finally said, “Maybe she didn’t have someone to teach her what to do. I didn’t know there was so much to learn about how to behave until you told me what I was doing wrong.”
“You’re probably right, but I can’t go around teaching everyone. There’s only so much time in a day. And besides, I have an interest in teaching you. You’re Anthony’s wife. That makes you more important than people like Miss Carlton.”
Well, Damara supposed Celia had a point. Still, it seemed rather harsh for Celia to be so dismissive of her.
“Miss Barlow,” the footman greeted as he approached them. “Lady Eloise is expecting you.” He glanced at Damara and asked Celia, “Is this your guest?”
“Yes. She’s my sister-in-law,” Celia replied, giving Damara an excited smile.
Damara quickly forgot about Miss Carlton as the footman offered her a greeting and then welcomed both ladies into the townhouse. She had to be sure she didn’t do anything to bring embarrassment to Celia.
Celia had put a lot of faith in her. She was willing to introduce her to her friends—friends who had a lot of influence in London. Her stomach tightened. All she had to do was remember Celia’s instructions. And if she forgot something, she’d make sure to watch Celia and follow her lead. Two hours. She just needed to be on her best behavior for two hours. God willing, two hours from now, Celia wouldn’t be thinking she was as hopeless as poor Miss Carlton.
Chapter Nineteen
An hour later at Lady Eloise’s, Loretta was fighting back the urge to cry as she sipped her tea. It was hard for a lady to pretend she was happy when the world was crashing down around her.
The other ten ladies sat around the circular table, completely oblivious to the turmoil as they sipped tea or nibbled an assortment of pastries in front of them. Meanwhile, Lady Eloise gave an exhaustive account of the people they shouldn’t associate with if they intended to stay in the group.
Loretta hadn’t had the stomach to sit with Celia since she had brought Damara with her, so she opted to sit across from them. This was probably the worst move she could have made because it was too easy to look straight ahead and see her. At least if Celia had sat between them, she could keep looking away from her more easily. But she was stuck for another hour in this miserable predicament whether she liked it or not.
And try as she might, she couldn’t seem to take her eyes off of Anthony’s wife. Damara was beautiful. Extremely so. Was it no wonder he ditched Loretta to marry her? What gentleman could resist a lady who had both the face and figure that was the envy of every lady in London? What Loretta wouldn’t give to look like her.
“What about Lady Steinbeck?” Lady Stacey asked at the table. “My brother knows Lord Steinbeck from his business dealings, and he says Lord Steinbeck has substantial influence in London. His money and reputation are both excellent. Wouldn’t his wife be an asset to this group?”
“If we could get Lady Steinbeck in here, it might help my husband acquire good business contacts,” Lady Gareth added. “My husband’s been upset because of the money he lost on recent investments.”
&nbs
p; Celia’s gaze met Loretta’s from across the table, and Celia smirked. They both were well acquainted with Lord Steinbeck’s wife. She’d been known as Lady Iris before he married her. Usually, Loretta would have had to hide her chuckle since she didn’t care for Iris any more than Celia did. But for some reason, she couldn’t bring herself to care today. Anthony was married to someone else. What did her personal feelings for Iris matter?
Lady Eloise set down her teacup with an authoritative clang and straightened in her seat. Though she couldn’t be older than Loretta, she had a way about her that made Loretta think she was forty, if not fifty. And because of that, others—even those older in the group—looked to her to lead them.
Lady Eloise clasped her hands in front of her and scanned the ladies at the table. Loretta inwardly shivered. Celia didn’t think Lady Eloise could see into someone’s soul, but there were times Loretta felt as if Lady Eloise knew her most intimate secrets.
“It’s true that Lord Steinbeck is an admirable gentleman in London,” Lady Eloise began. “His wife, however, isn’t one of us. Nor can she ever be. She’s not very attractive. She lacks sufficient social graces. And more than that, she enjoys investing, which is strictly a gentleman’s activity. I’m afraid she must be avoided as much as possible. If one of you has a brother or a husband who would benefit from an acquaintance with Lord Steinbeck, I fully understand why you must bear to be in her presence should you have to attend a dinner party with her. But it’s best if you are never seen in public with her. If you do see her in public, pretend you don’t know her. There are allowances we give for private matters that we can’t make when others are around.” She scanned their faces. “Does anyone have a problem with that?”
The room was silent. Loretta didn’t even dare swallow in case someone heard her. When Lady Eloise took that kind of tone, she was serious, and the last thing anyone should do was upset her. To do so would be social suicide.
“Good.” Lady Eloise relaxed and smiled. “We must be mindful of how important it is to marry the right person.”
Well, Loretta couldn’t argue that. If only Damara had married someone else, then she wouldn’t be in such a sorry state right now because Anthony had met up to Lady Eloise’s standards.
“Are there any other people you have questions about?” Lady Eloise asked. No one indicated they wanted to speak, so she offered a curt nod and picked up her teacup. “Now that we have discussed the proper people to associate with this Season, let’s discuss what we should wear.”
Loretta only paid half attention as Lady Eloise ran through a list of fashionable clothes. She should be especially interested in this particular discussion since she hadn’t shopped for new clothes yet, minus the gown she currently wore. A gown, she lamented, that must never been worn in public again. The gown was so pretty. Its golden hue went well with her red hair. So few clothes complimented her complexion this well. But Lady Eloise knew what she was talking about, and the only worthwhile thing Loretta had was her reputation. She’d rather die than lose that.
Once the topic of fashion was over, Lady Eloise discussed new phrases they could use to convey private meanings while in public. One Loretta particularly liked was, “Today is lovelier than yesterday,” which was a secret code for, “Let’s go somewhere else. I don’t care much for the people around us.”
Loretta and Celia often encountered situations in public when undesirables were approaching. She bet she and Celia would use that one often during the Season.
Once that was done, Lady Eloise ran off a list of gentlemen she believed would be suitable for marriage. With a sigh, Loretta forced down another sip of tea. Last year, Anthony had been on that list, and worse, Loretta had believed it meant she was fated to marry him.
“This year, I am adding a new gentleman to the list,” Lady Eloise said toward the end of her spiel. “The Duke of Lambeth.”
Even Loretta, who was only half paying attention nearly dropped her cup at this announcement. The Duke of Lambeth? Lady Eloise couldn’t be serious!
“Why would you choose the Duke of Lambeth?” Lady Stacey asked on Loretta’s behalf. “He’s a rake.”
“He used to be a rake,” Lady Eloise said. “I know there’s the saying, Once a rake, always a rake, but he has lived the life of a saint for the past three years. No one has heard even a hint of a scandal about him. It’s as if he became an entirely new person. I’ve also heard he refuses to marry anyone. He won’t even go to balls to dance with a lady. Several ladies tried last Season to win him, and they all failed.” A grin crossed her face. “He is London’s biggest challenge, and because of that, I am adding him to the list. If any of you can secure a marriage to him, you will have done what no other lady has been able to do.”
Had it been any other lady who said this, Loretta didn’t think the others would be impressed. But Lady Eloise had been the one to give the decree. And that changed everything.
What Loretta wouldn’t give for that kind of influence. If she could say something and make an entire room of people agree with her, she would have the world at her feet. Many times she couldn’t help but admire Lady Eloise for her ability to do what no one else could. Not even Lady Cadwalader matched her. Lady Cadwalader had a lot of influence. There was no denying that. But Lady Eloise had a way of captivating people when she spoke.
“With our business done,” Lady Eloise began with a satisfied smile, “let’s adjourn to the veranda and converse in private groups.”
Loretta joined the others and left the room. She intentionally left well before Celia could. Celia was still with Damara, and while the next half hour would be spent talking to whomever she wished, she most definitely did not want to talk to Damara. It was all she could do to be in the same room with the lady without screaming in frustration.
As soon as she made it to the veranda, she made a beeline right for Lady Gareth. Unfortunately, Celia jumped in front of her.
“Did you know I had to run to keep up with you?” Celia asked in a hushed voice. “You nearly caused me to lose my standing in this group. Thankfully, the others are busy talking to Damara, so they didn’t notice.”
Oh? So that meant when Loretta turned around, Damara wouldn’t be right behind her? She hesitated for a moment, but then she turned around, and sure enough, Damara was on the other side of the veranda with a group of ladies gathered around her.
Loretta breathed a sigh of relief. Good. “I knew you were bringing her, but I didn’t expect it to be so difficult to see her.”
“I understand.” Celia led her to a couple of chairs away from the group and sat with her. “It hasn’t been easy to act like her friend. The betrayal hurts me as much as it does you, but I’m beginning to think the betrayal wasn’t even on her part. I think it was on Anthony’s.”
Loretta wished she could be surprised, but in all honesty, she wasn’t.
“I’ve been trying to get Damara to confess she tricked him into marriage, but no matter what angle I try, she doesn’t do it,” Celia whispered to Loretta. “For one, she says she didn’t even know he was betrothed to you when she married him.”
“I’m sure she didn’t.”
“That’s why I thought she seduced him. So I confessed one of my own transgressions to her. You remember what I told you about my dalliance with Mr. Lincoln last year when he was visiting my brother? I told her everything. Then I asked her what she and my brother did before they married, and she said all she did was brush her breast against his arm and kiss him.”
“That’s it?” Loretta asked.
“I know. It’s shocking. One would think someone who secured a marriage within a day would do more than we ever did.”
Though Loretta didn’t want to do it, she glanced over at Damara who was surrounded by Lady Eloise and four other ladies. The rest were further away, but, like Loretta, they were looking in her direction—all equally curious about her.
“It’s not really all that shocking when you consider the truth,” Loretta said. Though
it pained her to say the words aloud, she turned her gaze back to Celia. “He married her because he didn’t want to marry me.”
Celia gasped, her hand going to her mouth. “No. Don’t say that.”
“It’s true. He married the first lady he came across who made herself available to him so that he wouldn’t have to come back to London and marry me.” She quickly wiped her eyes before anyone else noticed. “I’m such a fool. I should have realized he didn’t want to marry me when he said he wouldn’t do it until he came back to London. I spent every day he was gone thinking of him. It seemed like winter would never end. Each day was longer than the last. I didn’t feel like I could breathe again until the Season started. But it wasn’t the same for him.” She turned her gaze to her friend. “I can’t figure out why he said he’d marry me in the first place. Can you?”
“You’re a wonderful lady, and you’re my friend. Why wouldn’t he want to marry you?”
“It had nothing to do with me being wonderful. He must have agreed to it because he knew how much it meant to you. You’re his sister, and he’d move heaven and earth to do what you want.”
Loretta could tell Celia was struggling to come up with an argument to prove her wrong. But she couldn’t. And the reason she couldn’t was because Loretta was right.
After a few moments, Loretta put her hand over her friend’s. “It’s all right, Celia. You meant well. You knew how much I loved him and wanted me to be happy. I love you for that.”
Celia’s eyes brimmed with tears. “It’s just not fair. You would have made him a good wife. I know it. Everything was going to be perfect. You and my brother. Me and Corin. All good friends. All enjoying each other’s company. And she ruined it for all of us.”
Again, Loretta glanced over at Damara. The beautiful lady seemed overwhelmed by all of the attention, but she managed to smile and nod while Lady Eloise talked to her. Damara would fit in well with the group. She hadn’t seen Lady Eloise taking such an immediate liking to anyone before. Some ladies had all the luck, and Damara happened to be one of them. Damara didn’t just have natural grace, but she had charm, too. No wonder Anthony wanted her.
The Viscount's Runaway Bride (Marriage by Bargain Book 1) Page 15
