by Box Set
He hung his head. "I never should have had that party. You'd never have found Alec again and it would be me taking you to breakfast, not him."
I bit my lip until the sharp little teeth threatened to tear through the skin. "No, Bryson. That isn't true. I'm sorry, but it isn't. Please. You guys are roommates. You have to let this go or you'll both be miserable."
Alec paid and reached for the two bags the woman handed him and I wanted to race back to the kitchens and kiss them all for being so quick with our food. But that would be weird, so I didn't.
Bryson shoved his hands in his pockets, staring at the floor. "He isn't right for you Navi." My breath caught in my throat as he looked up, his crystal blue eyes meeting mine, so full of pain. "One day you’ll realize that."
"Ready?" Alec asked, his voice barely above a growl. I stared at Bryson in confusion for several seconds before I could manage to tear my eyes away from him and nod. Was that some kind of threat? It had sounded an awful lot like a threat.
But no. No way. He was a sweet guy, right?
"Yeah," I said slowly. "Yeah, I'm ready." To Bryson, I said, "I'm really sorry. I hope... I hope you feel better."
He didn't say anything, just watched us walk away.
The bell above the door didn't sound quite so cheerful as we left.
Chapter 13
"What was that?" I asked as soon as we made it outside.
Alec hung his head, looking as dejected as Bryson had. "I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me."
"Alec—"
"No, wait." He opened the truck door and helped me in. I tried to remember I was angry so I shouldn't feel the heat spiral through my body where his hands touched my waist. "I do know what that was."
I thunked into my side and slid my seat belt on as he shut the door. He climbed in and jammed the key into the ignition but didn't start the truck. "Navi, you don't understand."
He had no idea how right he was. "So explain it to me."
He ran a hand over his face, leaning back against the headrest. "I don't... I don't know how."
Bryson had left the restaurant, coffee cup in hand. Alec must have seen him, because he started the truck and backed out, roaring onto the road like my demons were after him. "I have an idea. Can you wait to eat for about ten minutes?" He gave me the most vulnerable face ever. I was mad, but not mad enough to say no to that face.
"Yes," I said quietly.
We drove in silence. No singing, no talking. I stared out the window and wished I could cry. I hadn't cried in three and a half years. Now, I wasn't sure if I even could.
Alec turned off the main road and onto a dirt path barely wide enough for his great big truck. It was overgrown with tall grasses and low hanging trees, but I recognized it instantly. His parents had a piece of land in the middle of the forest. There wasn't much out there—they mostly used it for camping, but Alec and I had hung out there a lot in high school.
He backed up so the bed of the truck overlooked the river. The leaves were starting to change, and we were surrounded by reds and golds and greens and the blue, blue sky. I was glad he'd parked in the shade. The sun and I didn't get along so well.
He got out and came around to my side. Again, he lifted me out. Heat seared me as I slid down his body. Trapped between him and the truck, I could only stare up at him helplessly, praying he would kiss me, praying he wouldn't.
I was a very confused girl.
He finally backed away, reaching around me to grab our breakfast. I felt equal measures of disappointment and relief, which made absolutely no sense.
Food. I needed food. And sleep. Then the world would be right again.
He opened the second set of doors without looking at me and pulled out a thick quilt. I wandered away to the river, absently sliding off my flip-flops so I could stick my toes in the icy water. We lived minutes from the ocean, and I knew Alec loved it, but he had never once taken me there. I didn't mind because I spent enough time at the beach fighting demons and knowing what comes out of the water at night makes me less likely to think it's beautiful in the day.
But rivers. Rivers are a different thing entirely. I had never seen a demon come out of a river. They bubbled and roared and were cheerful and beautiful. They were my weakness. This river, especially, because along with it being a river that was cheerful and beautiful and bubbly and roar-y, there were a ton of memories here. Good memories.
I glanced over my shoulder at Alec, who was spreading the blanket into the back of his truck.
Very good memories.
"I screwed up," he said, jumping down from the truck and coming over to me.
I raised an eyebrow and waited for him to continue.
"I know—look, I know we aren't together."
Ouch.
But he continued before I had a chance to register that my pain made no sense because we'd only just re-met.
"I know until yesterday you probably hadn't even thought about me for years"—
Right. Not even close.
—"but dammit, Navi! I haven't stopped thinking about you. You walked in last night and it felt like time hadn't passed and you were still mine and you still belonged in my arms. And those six hours without you felt like six more years."
"I... -I thought you hated me," I whispered. "All those years—I went all the way to Alaska to get away from you!" Pain lanced across his face and I instantly regretted my words. "I didn't mean—"
"No." He shook his head. "No, I deserved it. But Navi, you have to know, what happened in high school—I didn't mean for it to get out."
I sighed. I didn't want to talk about high school. High school hurt.
"Letting you go was the stupidest thing I've ever done," he whispered, his voice hoarse.
The world stopped. Everything froze. Time shattered. "It was?"
He ran a hand over his face, peering at me through his fingers. "By far. Do you know how many times I called you after we broke up? To beg you to come back. But the way you glared at me in the hall—I always chickened out and hung up before it started to ring."
I'd done the same thing. A thousand times. Maybe two thousand. I still remembered my carefully rehearsed speech, in which I begged him to believe me and if he didn't, I told him the whole truth.
But yeah... even in my daydreams I knew how that conversation would go. Then the whole school wouldn't have just thought I was a cheating slut, they would think I was crazy, too. And Alec would die because I'd opened his eyes to the demons. They liked to kill the ones who could see them coming.
I frowned, remembering. Remembering the snickers and the guys following me around thinking I was easy.
"No. Don't you start thinking about it, Navi. Don't you dare. I finally got you to talk to me again." He tipped his head, catching me so that I was trapped in that dark blue gaze. "I know we just re-met, but I... I don't want you to date Bryson."
I blinked. That wasn't on the list of things I'd been expecting him to say. Trying to hide my smirk, I said, "What's wrong with Bryson?"
"Nothing's wrong with Bryson," Alec growled, scowling. "Everything. He's not right for you."
I leaned back, crossing my arms while I dug my toes into the mud. It was cold and squishy and reminded me of being a little kid when my parents used to take me to the river. Never, ever the beach, but the river, yes. "And who is it you think is right for me?" I asked innocently.
"Me, Navi. I think I'm right for you."
Now I couldn't help but grin. I raised an eyebrow, dancing away. "You do, do you?"
He swore under his breath as a rueful smile creased his gorgeous face. "Yes. I do. I don't want you to date anyone else. Just me."
"I don't know... you're practically a stranger. A stranger who hasn't fed me yet."
"Oh crap." He grabbed my hand and pulled me over to the truck, lifting me into the back as if I weighed less than a small dog. "You have all day to get to know me."
I laughed as I settled against the front of the bed and dug out my breakfast
. Holy Hannah, I was starving. One thing about fighting at night, it used a ton of calories and I had to eat like an elephant the next day.
So far, there had been no eating at all, elephant or otherwise.
"All day, huh?" I asked between bites. "I thought this was just breakfast."
"That was before you raised the stakes. If I'm gonna talk you into being with me and no one else, it's going to take more than breakfast."
Chapter 14
Alec
I watched her. I'd pretty much just bared my soul, and she hadn't run screaming. Instead, she ate like I'd starved her half to death. There was hope. Maybe, just maybe, she felt the same way I did.
For those fifteen minutes it'd taken to get from the Chicken Coop to here, I'd thought I had lost her. I didn't even have her yet and I thought I'd lost her. The panic in those minutes had nearly driven me over the edge. How could I be so afraid of losing something I hadn't even realized I desperately wanted until less than twenty-four hours ago?
"Whatcha thinkin', stranger?" she asked, looking up at me with those dark, dark eyes. I was caught and falling, drowning in her gaze—it was becoming a habit every time I looked at her. Her lips quirked in that teasing grin I wanted to kiss right off her mouth.
"I'm thinking..." I'm thinking I'm falling hard and fast and it scares the hell out of me. But letting you go scares me worse.
She raised an eyebrow when I didn't continue. "If I didn't know better, I'd say you were as tired as I am." And she yawned.
She was the only person I knew who was adorable when she yawned. She sort of squeaked at the end, like a little mouse.
"You need to rest." I tried not to be disappointed. She had, after all, only gotten two hours of sleep but I'd been hoping I was entertaining enough that she'd forget how exhausted she was.
She shrugged. "Work takes a lot out of me."
"What happened last night?" I asked. I knew her mom had been a probation officer, but Navi was tiny and sweet. I couldn't picture her ordering around reformed criminals any more than I could picture Bryson actually working a real job.
"There was just a minor... skirmish. Nothing major but it took quite a while." She traced the seam on her yoga pants with her finger, shaking her head. "I'm worried about some of my charges. I think they're losing interest in saving their souls." She flushed and jerked her head up, like she'd said something wrong. I hadn't really ever thought about parolees as being in danger of losing their souls, but then I hadn't met a lot of them, either.
"I'm sorry." It sounded lame, but I honestly couldn't think of anything else to say.
She smiled and shook her head, scooting closer to me. My heart tried to claw its way right out of my throat. "I'm sorry I'm so tired for our first date in four years."
"Hey. Come here." I slid my arm around her shoulders and pulled her into me, sliding down and bunching up the quilt until it made a nice little pillow behind me. I hadn't gotten a whole lot of sleep the night before, either. I could nap.
She curled against me, her leg sliding up to lay across my thigh and she put her head on my chest. Yeah. There was not a chance in hell I was going to sleep at all. "Are you sure you don't mind?" she asked, tipping her head back to look up at me.
I kissed her forehead. "No. I definitely do not mind."
She sighed contentedly and burrowed against me, and I was absolutely positive my blood was humming. With her head against my chest, I knew she could hear my heart pounding. Any chance of playing it cool was completely gone. Instead I tangled my fingers in the silk of her hair, sliding it against my skin. I watched the sky above us through the thick leaves and stroked my other hand up and down her back until her breathing evened out and she relaxed against me.
This. This was heaven.
Chapter 15
I could tell the second she woke up because in the two hours that she'd been sleeping on my chest, I'd memorized her heartbeat. I could feel it against my side, and when she woke, it sped up. Quite a bit.
I grinned triumphantly. I wasn't the only one having trouble playing it cool.
She stretched, and in those few delicious seconds I could feel every curve of her against me. "How long have I been keeping you trapped here?" she asked, pushing herself up. The absence of her warmth felt like someone attacking my soul with shards of ice. I wanted her back.
"Not long enough," "I said. I crossed my arms behind my head and raised an eyebrow at her. She flushed and bit her lip. If she had any idea just how insane I went when she did that, she'd stop doing it. Or maybe she knew already and she was tempting me.
One could only hope.
"I forgot how beautiful it is here." Clearly, an attempt to change the subject. I didn't fight it, instead following her gaze to the river. She'd always loved the water. I shoved myself up and climbed out of the back of the truck, a little stiff because lying on the rough bed for two hours, even with the comforter, was uncomfortable.
But it had been worth it.
She started after me, her shoes still in the truck. "Hop on," I said. She didn't hesitate, sliding from the truck onto my back. I carried her over to the water and slowly let her down in the soft mud. She rolled her pants up to her knees and I drank up the sight of her tan, slender legs like they alone could save me. Did the girl have no flaws?
"I like the water," she murmured, almost as if she'd forgotten I was there. She waded deeper, dancing lightly over rocks worn smooth from countless years in this current. She'd always played sports when I knew her, especially football, but she moved with the grace of a ballerina. My mom had thought she was some sort of fairy princess in another life.
"Can I ask you a question?" She paused and looked over her shoulder at me through thick lashes. Her cheeks were flushed and I could tell that whatever was coming made her uncomfortable.
"Yep." Because honestly, what else could I say?
She turned to face me, twisting her hands in front of her and nibbling on her lip. Apparently she wanted to drive me straight to the brink of insanity. "In your room last night..."
I grinned and her cheeks went even brighter. "That's not what I meant..."
"Sorry." I tried to rearrange my face into a solemn expression, but must have failed, judging by the look she gave me.
"There was a picture..."
Holy crap. She'd seen her picture? I thought... I was sure I'd put it back in the drawer. Well this was awkward. Telling her I'd never gotten over her was one thing. Having her picture in my nightstand after all these years bordered on obsessed. "I can explain."
"Is he... is he yours?"
"It's just that—what?" He? Suddenly I had no idea what we were talking about.
"The picture of the little boy in your room. Is he yours?"
Finally, it all clicked into place and I burst out laughing. "No, Angel. No."
"Oh. I just wondered. Not that I have anything against kids, but, you know, if I agree to this girlfriend stuff I need to know—" She stopped, biting her lip.
In two short strides I crossed the river to her stride. I couldn't handle it anymore, her nibbling on that pink lip, pouting, tempting me beyond all sense of reason. I slid my hand up to cup her cheek and lowered my head to hers.
It was like coming home. The soft sweetness of her mouth against mine, the gasp against my lips as her entire body tensed. Then she sighed against me and slid her arms around my neck, twining her hands behind my head and pulling me closer.
I was only too happy to do her bidding.
"You have no idea how long I've been waiting for this," I said against her mouth.
"I might." Navi sighed as I slid my tongue across her bottom lip, reveling in the feel of her against me. She sucked in a breath.
I wanted her. More than I'd ever wanted anyone. But I couldn't let that happen, not yet. I didn't want to ruin this—I needed her too bad. Instead I scooped her into my arms and carried her back to my truck. I laid her down and stretched out next to her, leaning up on one arm so I could brush her dark hair back
away from her face while she watched me.
"Who is he?" she asked suddenly, her voice breathy and shaking just a little.
"He?" For the life of me, I could not figure out who we were talking about.
"The boy in the picture. In your room."
I reached out and traced her lips with my finger, then trailed across her jaw line and down her throat, memorizing every detail, every freckle, every scar. There were a lot of them, I realized with a frown. Lots of little scars across her face, and a bigger one on her neck, usually hidden in her hair.
"Alec?" she asked, searching my eyes. Belatedly, I realized she was worried about this picture. Seriously, I needed to focus.
"He's my little brother, Jack. Remember, I told you about him last night?"
"Your brother." She let her breath out in a relieved whoosh, her eyes fluttering closed. "Of course."
"My parents were lonely. I grew up too fast or something." I leaned forward and kissed her again, gently, my fingers tangling in her hair. I could do this for the rest of the day. For the rest of my life. Just stay here with this girl under this sky.
Chapter 16
Navi
The sun had set over an hour ago, and I had no desire to move out of Alec's arms. We'd covered four years worth of memories in one afternoon, and it still didn't feel like enough. I needed more, even as the little buzzing voice in the back of my head kept saying, don't let him hurt you. Don't let him hurt you.
He wouldn't hurt me. He'd said losing me was the worst mistake he'd ever made. You didn't say something like that and then turn around and break someone's heart.
Right?
I lay on his chest, listening to his heart beat while his hand slowly stroked up and down my spine, sending delicious shivers racing across my skin. "You know, I went to Alaska once. Looking for you. But I got there and had no idea where to even start searching. I came back empty handed."
