by Julia Talbot
“Thank you, my friend.” Tom hung up before moving to stoke the fire. Nathan? My man friends will bring more meat soon.
Nathan’s eyes popped open. Tom.
Shhh. I’m still me. See? He folded his legs to sit next to Nathan and dug his hands into Nathan’s ruff.
Nathan didn’t question him, just crawled into his lap with a sigh, the song gentle and constant.
He wrapped his arms around Nathan, humming. “They’re sending Ed. He’s new. A magpie shifter, Tanner says. How cool is that?”
Curiosity flooded him, and then the image of birds—blackbirds—flying everywhere.
“Yes. They’re the ones with the white stripes. They’re big and bold.” He was fascinated by the way Nathan communicated with him. Was this normal? Was it always so wonderful with mates? Was it always this immediate?
He hoped everyone else he knew got to feel how wondrous this was. Tom scrubbed his hands through the thick fur over and over. What did Nathan look like as a man? He didn’t ask or even send the question out into the ether.
Right now Nathan needed food and water and care. The rest would come, he knew it. This was trauma. Poor baby; Nathan had been on the run, clearly for a long time. Now he was safe, and Tom was going to make sure of it.
Tom stroked along Nathan’s side. “They’re bringing food—bacon and roast—and if you want anything else, I will make sure you get it.”
Meat. Just more meat.
Tom tilted his head. Surely Nathan knew what bacon was. Right? Of course he did. He just meant he wanted big chunks of meat. Lots of it. That was what would warm Nathan and let some of his scars heal more. Those ones on his neck were old, though. Scary.
He’d been told their kind didn’t scar like that. “Were you bitten, Nathan?”
Nathan’s head tilted, those gorgeous eyes confused.
“Did someone bite you to make you a wolf?”
I am a wolf.
I know, sweet. I know. He was trying not to be frustrated, because he knew there was something blocking Nathan’s memories. Tom could see it in his mind like a brick wall that stretched out forever.
How odd was that? Seriously? How strange.
His phone rang, and Nathan jumped. “Shh. It’s just Tanner. Hello?”
“Ed’s on the way.”
“Thanks, Tanner. I really appreciate it.” He really loved this place.
“Hello?” The voice was somehow low and chirpy at the same time.
He decided to let Ed come on in. Nathan needed to see that men could be good. “In here. Come on.”
The man danced in, hair and eyes black as pitch, except for the swatch of pure white at the temples. Tom stared—he had to, who wouldn’t?—as he swirled in, clothes a fascinating series of… feathers? Were those feathers?
“You must be Ed. I’m Tom, and this is Nathan.”
“Hello, Tom.” Ed looked at Nathan, not the slightest bit awkward, and bowed. “Mr. Nathan. Bright morning!”
Nathan yawned, a clear sign of… if not warning, then disinterest.
Ed didn’t seem the least bit worried. “I brought that meat. Should I put it on the counter?”
“Please. Thank you so much.”
“I’m so glad to meet you both. I love wolves. They have the most fun. Not that Carter’s not a blast. We play. And Tanner? Yum. Big bear.”
He chuckled, watching Nathan’s ears swivel. Someone thought Ed was a hoot, now.
Ed kept chattering, the words pointless, the happy sounds just meant to comfort. Like a magpie. He also set a brush on a stool.
“Thank you, Ed.”
“Not a problem. If you need anything, you just call. I like to play in the snow, Nathan. Come see me!” A single feather with a sparkling bit of ribbon was offered to Nathan, and then the man disappeared.
Tom grinned down at a very shocked-looking wolf. “I think he really wants to play.”
Play. Nathan chuffed softly and nosed the ribbon.
“Yes. I like to play too. I romp with Carter. You’ll like him.” He went to look at their meat options. “He’s a big kitty. He’s my hero.”
Hero? Nathan tilted his head. Why?
“I was bitten by a werewolf, and I freaked out. Like, totally lost it. I couldn’t control it. I kept having an ear pop out or my tail. Carter came one day when I was trapped midshift. He helped me. He stayed when I was hurting.”
He would always love Carter for that. And give his friend any help he ever needed.
He’s your mate?
No. No, he’s my friend. Just my friend.
Nathan watched him, gaze clear, sharp.
He smiled, stroking those ears. “Would you like some meat? Ed brought us a nice roast.” Or he could give Nathan some bacon. Maybe he should do that.
Shh. Be at ease. At ease. Nathan leaned hard against his leg.
“I am. I just want to feed you bacon.” This was a joy everyone should know. He would happily sit with Nathan, though.
Nathan followed him, nostrils flaring, muzzle in the air.
“I know. It’s crispy pork. So good.” He pulled down the plate, removing the cover. Oh, smell that. Crunchy and salty and perfect. He handed Nathan a piece.
Nathan snapped it up, so careful not to bite his fingertips. Those eyes widened in surprise, and Nathan licked his chops over and over.
“Isn’t that good?”
More. That was part demand, part plea.
He laughed, utterly delighted, and moved back to the fire. They settled, and he fed Nathan more bacon.
Nathan was in his lap, heavy and warm, eyes on the food.
Someone liked bacon.
He took a bite of his own, then handed another to Nathan, who snapped it up with one neat bite.
Bacon. Nathan chuffed softly. Bacon. Eggs.
“That’s right, bacon and eggs. They go together.” He was so happy. “Do you want eggs? I can call….”
Nathan’s confusion was like vinegar, the worry salty and harsh.
“No, no.” He stroked that fur. “This is a hotel of sorts. That’s what they do. You call and they do things for you.”
There was a hint of recognition, of a memory. Then it faded.
He gave Nathan more bacon because it made everything better. What had happened? Why was Nathan short on memories and scarred so badly? He wanted to know everything. Tom grinned. He was impatient by nature.
“I am so glad you trusted me, came inside. It worried me, having you in the snow.”
Nathan licked his hand, grooming him. Maybe looking for bacon. Thank you.
“You’re so very welcome, sweet. You are. I like the fire. I think you do too, but you can sleep in the bed with me too.”
Nathan stood up, bowed for him, the act graceful, so sweet. He watched, wanting to make sure Nathan didn’t think he had to leave. Was he pushing too much, or was this good?
“Come on. I’ll let you explore. This is a great cabin. I stayed here before. When I was learning to control my wolf.”
Your wolf. Who is your wolf?
“Me. I told you, I was bitten, and when I started to change between man and wolf, I needed a place to stay.” He would repeat, patiently, anything Nathan needed.
Nathan huffed, the sound impatient. Now. Who is your wolf now?
You are. “You are.” He said it out loud, because he knew it was true.
I am. God, the joy.
The joy.
He shook, his wolf surging to the forefront, demanding to be out right now. Right fucking now. So Tom let it come, throwing off the robe and dropping to all fours. Nathan began to bark furiously, calling him, demanding that he show himself.
He growled, his wolf pushing out past his human skin. It always hurt a little, where Carter always said he never even felt it. Maybe that was how it was being bitten. Maybe it never flowed as smoothly as a born shifter.
Soon enough, though, he was his wolf self.
Nathan danced around him, licking and nudging him, the happy barking welcoming him.<
br />
Tom! Tom! Tom!
Yes. Hello, love. He nuzzled one shoulder. I want to run with you.
It was so much easier now, to be lupine, to be in this form. He didn’t have to fight his body when Nathan was so pleased. They danced, Nathan nudging him.
So beautiful. He could feel Nathan’s pleasure, his admiration.
Run. Play. Nathan poked him again with that long snout.
Yes. He bolted for the door. Nathan was on his heels, driving him with happy little nips to his tail. Silly wolf. They romped, running in circles around the clearing behind his cabin.
The snow was fluffy and light, poofing up around them in clouds. Nathan was lightning, spinning around him, ducking and bobbing like he was on springs.
Tom thought it was the cutest thing ever. Ever.
He bounced back, rising up on his back legs to bat at Nathan playfully. Nathan pushed into his belly, bouncing off him. He chuffed and pounced, bowling Nathan over.
Nathan barked, but those teeth never closed on his fur or skin. This play was gentle in its roughness.
Amazing what a little bacon and a warm night of sleep could do for a wolf. Tom panted, his tongue dragging, and oh, he was so thirsty all of a sudden. He barked, wagging, warning Nathan that he wanted to head back inside. He needed a drink.
Water. Fresh water. Nathan followed him, easy this time, ready to come inside.
He chuffed, so pleased they were making such progress. Tom wanted Nathan’s trust. Nathan’s soft vocalizations answered him, sharing his laughter.
Oh, Tom was so in love already. So much.
Now he just needed to get Nathan to believe he could be a man too.
He knew it was in there—the human, the memories—and this was a safe place to explore those things. Nathan just had to get past that wall of fear, because that was what the wall was in his mind. A huge pocket of fear.
Of course, it hadn’t been a whole day. Nathan needed more—more care, more food, more rest. Tom wouldn’t push. Even though he wanted to.
He found the water bowl and moved Nathan to it first.
Nathan bowed deep for him, muzzle on the floor in thanks. Such good manners.
Tom wagged, encouraging. He was providing for his mate. Maybe in a totally modern way, but he was.
Nathan drank deep, chest moving like a bellows. So dry.
We’re way up here, huh? He was used to a little humidity at home.
Mountains. Snow. So much snow.
You had a time of it, didn’t you. What was Nathan running from?
The image of a tiny, bare den hit him, right between the eyes. The place was like a prison cell, with chains attached to the wall and just a threadbare rug and pillow on the floor.
Oh. Oh, sweet. He pressed against Nathan’s side, offering comfort.
Cage. I came to the mountains.
I’m so glad you did. He licked at Nathan’s muzzle.
Stay? The question shimmered on the air.
Yes. Stay with me. They would have to talk about Dallas and what he did and all, but those were details.
He was working now, wasn’t he? Rescuing his mate?
Once Nathan had calmed some, Tom took a long drink of water, the wet and cold easing his throat. Yum.
Come nap? He wanted to curl up in the blankets.
Nathan followed him into the bedroom, toward the huge bed.
Tom napped way more as a wolf. Maybe his body was just more vulnerable this way, or maybe the human felt way more obligation to be awake and productive. He hopped onto the bed, making sure Nathan had room to get up.
Nathan leaped up, scrabbling on the blankets playfully.
Tom barked, a laugh in wolf form. Then he walked in circles, making a flat spot. Nathan watched him, then plopped over on one side, right in his space, fur tickling his nose.
Tom sneezed, his ears flopping.
That was a laugh, Nathan huffing softly. Little shit. He gnawed a little at that strong shoulder, just to show he wasn’t mad. In fact, he was so happy he hurt.
Nathan nuzzled in, hiding his muzzle in Tom’s ruff. They had slept this way the night before, but the bed was so much more comfortable.
He hummed. Sleep. Sleep, now.
They would romp again later.
Chapter Five
NATHAN explored the new den, pulling cloth under the bed to make a nest for them that was safe, hidden. Then he pulled the meat down. Hid that for later.
Then he went to mark outside.
It was midafternoon, Tom still sleeping. He thought Tom needed a lot of naps.
It was the man in him, Nathan thought. That seemed painful. The switching back and forth had to be exhausting. That body went through a lot every time.
Something hard landed on his head, then dropped to the ground with a splat in the snow. He thought it was a walnut. Why were walnuts falling from aspen trees?
He tilted his head, and a huge ebony bird fluttered down in front of him, head bobbing as it cackled. It was black with white markings over its wings and head, its eyes a deep red.
Somehow, it looked familiar.
He snapped at the bird, just idly, playfully.
It hopped and scolded him, wings flapping. His head followed along, bobbing up and down. They danced together, which made him chuff, before the bird hopped right up on his back. Whoosh.
He danced, spinning around in the air, the bird’s wings flared wide. Play. Yes, this, he thought, was playing.
He bounced and spun, springing from the ground. Snow flew up around them, and the bird squawked, soaring up, then diving down. They wheeled around, barking and bawking, just running until he was panting and dizzy.
Play.
He flopped down on the ground, breathing hard. Oh. Tired.
The bird settled on the ground next to him, then plucked at his whiskers. He chuffed, only blowing his lips when they were pulled too hard.
Finally the bird climbed up his neck to settle on his shoulder, out of the snow.
“I think maybe that’s Ed, hmm?”
When he looked up, Tom stood in the doorway of the cabin, bundled in a robe, his man form back on him.
“Come on, you two. It’s cold, and it’s good to dry off by the fire.”
Nathan stood, his bones creaking.
Ed flapped to keep his balance, scolding him with chittery sounds.
I’m trying, bird. I won’t dump you into the snow. Silly creature.
Once he flopped down next to the fire, the bird hopped off and scampered to the water dish, then drank with quick motions.
“Would you like something to eat, Ed? I have cereal, roast, uh… blueberries?” Tom was a good provider.
Ed bobbed his head, galumphing back over to him. That was hilarious.
“So, uh…. Okay, I’ll go through slow again. Cereal?”
Ed ducked and flapped, cawing. Yes, someone wanted cereal. He chuffed happily, bobbing his head, teasing Ed.
They danced again, just for a little while, until Tom brought food. He wasn’t willing to share his meat, but Ed had a bowl of cereal. Tom had something that smelled nice too, but he wanted the meat. It was so fresh.
He waited for Tom to begin before digging into the meat, snapping it up, filling his belly.
Ed chittered and made fluttering noises as he ate, but it wasn’t annoying at all. He thought it was funny. Silly bird.
As soon as he was done, he went to Tom and curled about his feet.
“Mmm. You’re warming up. Did you two have fun playing?”
Yes. Play. Friend bird.
“I’m so glad. I think Ed has been looking for a friend.”
Ed looked up, cereal hanging from his beak, and chattered. Loud.
He rolled over, pawing gently at Ed, messing with him but not hurting.
Tom laughed while they pecked and licked each other. “Oh, you two are going to make me nuts, I can tell. I’m so tickled.”
Ed finished his cereal, then hopped over to rest his head on Tom’s foot, Nathan tho
ught in thanks. Tom reached down and stroked along Ed’s back, the touch featherlight.
Heh.
Featherlight.
Ed fluttered back over to him, pressing the side of his head to Nathan’s muzzle. Then he leaped into the air and flew right out the door, leaving him and Tom alone.
“Wow. That was… that was cool, huh? I’m glad he came to play.” Tom rubbed his ears. “You looked like you were having a ball.”
Fun. Silly bird. I like to play.
“It sounds like you didn’t get to a lot where you were before.” He could feel Tom’s worry about the cage.
Bad place. Bad cage.
“Yes. I’m so glad you got away from it. You deserve to run and play and see the world.”
He nudged Tom’s hand with his nose.
“Huh? It’s okay now. I promise.” Tom smiled down at him. “I like Ed.”
He did too. He liked to play. He bobbed his head, watching.
“What is it, sweet? You seem worried.” Tom stroked his ears, which felt so good.
Was he? He leaned, groaned, and pushed into Tom’s touch.
“Mmm. That’s it.” Tom stroked and scrubbed at his fur, then dug in to rub his muscles. There might be an advantage to having hands.
He went boneless, singing happily as his world went soft and fuzzy. Tom was good to him. So good. He walked with his paws a little, his right back leg beginning to thump.
“Oh, baby. You need loving on, don’t you?” Tom squatted down to really rub on him, hands strong and warm.
He whined, the touch almost unbearably good. Nathan closed his eyes, his nose twitching, his body shivering.
“I know. Oh, sweet, I know. We’re not meant to be alone. We were built for pack, for each other. We’re together now.”
Together. Pack. Each other.
He wanted to believe it so bad. Nathan panted with the force of it.
“Easy. Easy, I have you. It’ll be okay.”
Nathan hoped so. Something inside pushed at him, teased at his memory….
He shook his head, banishing it. There was agony there.
No, this was so much better. Safer. Warm. And there was Tom.
Tom, who was a light, a beacon, a beam.
“Nathan.” Tom was smiling for him, loving on him so well.
Tom. He reached for his mate with his entire soul.
Yes. Come to me, mate. I know you can.
