I was already covered in mud and blood. Why not add tears to the mix? My appearance would portray how battered and broken I truly felt.
“Hey,” she attempting to wipe my tears away. “You are okay. We are okay.”
She rested her warm comforting hand on my cheek and I reached for the dagger in her belt.
It was bloody and I felt sickened at the thought of her having to defend herself with it.
Nieve watched me curiously, absentmindedly rubbing her thumb across my cheek, as I held onto the blade and offered her the hilt.
“Do this for me.” I whispered, feeling strengthened by my decision.
She wrapped her other hand around the hilt, looking completely bemused.
“Do what Freya?” She asked in a whisper, my tears continued to fall silently down my face.
To die with Nieve smiling at me for the first time in months, knowing that I had set her free. It was perfect. I gave the dagger a tug in the direction of my chest to explain what I wanted her to do.
A blade through the heart from the woman who owned my heart.
The moment she understood what I wanted her beautiful smile faded. She let go of the dagger. Letting it fall with a clatter to the stable floor.
She took my head between her hands and pressed our foreheads together. I could feel her shaky breath against my lips and longed for her to close the gap between us.
“Freya no,” her voice was thick with emotion. “Please.”
Before I could plead, her hands were in my hair and she finally closed the distance between us.
The kiss was slow and made my eyes sting with tears as her nose brushed painfully against my own broken one.
This kiss would be the last time the two of us would ever share our love again, and we knew it.
We took our time, conveying the love we had been unable to share for months through our bodies.
Eventually, she pulled away from me and I let my hands drop from around her neck.
“Be strong for me,” she pleaded, placing one last kiss on my lips and leaving the stables.
I sat there alone for what could have been hours. My lips tingling from the kiss.
Outside I could hear the hooves of horses, and the livestock which we’d arranged for the humans to take south. Adair and William must have joined the humans, helping them organise their departure now that the fight was over.
I could hear laughter outside the stable and the sound of children, running and playing as they went.
By now, my nose had stopped bleeding and the cuts on my hand were only bleeding sluggishly from the deepest areas. My throat still ached from my earlier screaming. I resisted the temptation to cry again, giving in to my heartbreak would not help me.
The door of the stables creaked open and William appeared with a worried looking Mae.
“Nieve said you were here,” he explained as they wrapped a warm cloak around my shoulders. “It seems some of the humans weren’t prepared to wait for their new leader to organise their departure, decided they’d risk fighting their way out instead.”
Mae fussed and tried to make me drink water. Doing her best to clean the blood from me, obviously remembering my reaction to the beheading months ago.
“Mae stop, let’s get her inside first.” William said, lifting me up into his arms.
I expected the courtyard to be like something from my nightmares, with rivers of blood flowing across the stones, piles of bodies and weeping children.
Instead, the courtyard that greeted me couldn’t have been more different.
There were bodies, covered with blankets to hide them from view, but only a handful. The castle’s healers, and those gifted with healing magic, were loading injured humans up into wagons.
It seemed that, once the fairies saw me declaring that the humans were free, they accepted it. Helping them leave as if they were visitors journeying back home.
It scared me that I had the power to change their actions so drastically.
I couldn’t see Nieve anywhere in the courtyard but I assumed that she would remain until everyone had been sent on their way south.
William mentioned that he had spoken with her earlier so I guessed he knew about my request. My desire to die faded as the rush of panic from the fight settled.
I was glad that Nieve had refused.
If he did know, he did not mention it. Not even when we were back in my chambers and Mae was distracted, giving instructions to the remaining servant girls.
It was for the best that I did not see Nieve again.
Better that I did not watch her ride away from Culhuinn, and me, for I knew that sight would haunt my dreams until the day I died.
A elwen continued to insist that the humans joined us for meals, even introducing them to Ronan and the children. I could not understand why she did not send them back down south as soon as they had their answers. Though seeing them become steadily less gaunt and sickly was helping to ease my guilt.
The humans had made no comment about their imprisonment and starvation, but I knew that they thought of it each time they looked at me, especially Glen. I still could not believe what I had done.
Aelwen tried to reassure me, blaming my actions on grief and anger, but we both knew it did not justify the suffering I caused.
Other than Aelwen striking me, there had been no punishment for my actions. Though meals with Morven and Glen night after night felt like a punishment.
I took no part in their conversations, simply listening as Aelwen shared stories about our kingdom and the fairies. The human, Glen, in turn shared stories about the humans and the ridiculous rumours that they believed about us here in the north.
I watched as their cheeks flushed red while they laughed and drank, counted their freckles and thought of my love. How different this would be with Lachlann by my side.
It would have been easy to slip away into my memories, but I forced myself to listen.
I held onto the hope that, when I passed into the Otherworld, I would find Lachlann there waiting for me. I would share all I had learned about the humans when I got to him.
Teach him everything he should have known. Everything he would have known, had he not been murdered.
I was making my way through a bowl of broth, listening to Glen talk about their encounter with the enchantress in the forest, when the door opened and a messenger entered.
It was not the usual messenger from Wulvendach or someone from Selport bringing news of the selkies, which meant that the news was from Culhuinn.
I dropped my spoon back into the bowl, splattering broth all over the table.
“What news do you bring?” Aelwen demanded.
The messenger looked at the humans anxiously but Aelwen nodded for him to speak anyway.
This was the first direct contact Culhuinn had made with Norbroch since they stabbed Lachlann through the chest and left him bleeding to death in my arms.
To hide my shaking hands, I clenched the table so hard I felt a nail split and break.
“King Ferchar is dead, poisoned at his table. The Queen is also dead. Princess Freya survived the attempt on her life and now rules as the Queen of Culhuinn,” he said hurriedly.
There was a moment of stillness. Tormod, who was usually good at concealing his emotions, looked completely astounded. The humans were glancing between us and the messenger nervously whilst Aelwen seemed completely lost for words.
Slumping back down in my seat I let out a burst of laughter so loud and hysterical that it made Morven jump.
King Ferchar was dead.
The thought made me laugh again. Oh, it felt so good to truly laugh for the first time in a decade. Tears begin to stream down my face as I laughed and I laughed.
He was dead.
“Euna!” I heard Aelwen shout and when I opened my eyes she was in front of me, shaking me gently by the shoulders.
“He is dead,” I whispered, my speech interrupted by sobs.
When had I stopped laughing an
d started sobbing?
She guided my head forward until she was cradling it against her stomach and let me cry. I heard Tormod hurrying the humans, and the messenger, out of the hall but I did not care what they saw.
Finally, the man who killed the love of my life was dead. I hoped that the poison had brought him a slow and painful death.
I hoped that the Others would remember all that he had done when he arrived in the Otherworld. That they would make him suffer for what he did to Lachlann.
“Let’s get you up to your chambers,” Aelwen said eventually, brushing my hair out of my face and placed a kiss on my forehead.
Tormod must have told Ronan about the state I was in, for he came hurrying into the hall. Together they half guided and half carried me up to my chambers. From there they helped me dress for bed and tucked me under the covers as if I was one of their children.
I had expected to feel joyous at the death of the man I hated most, and for a moment I had. Rather than drinking and dancing until the sun rose, I felt drained. Like I had climbed a mountain and had nothing left to give. My hatred for King Ferchar had been the only thing holding me together all these years.
“Sleep well,” Aelwen whispered. “You can find peace now that he is dead, knowing that the Others will punish him for what he did.”
I nodded, curling myself up into a ball under the thick blankets, watching the shadows flicker in the candlelight.
Although we knew that the Others created life and helped protect our crops and livestock, little was known about the Otherworld. We knew that when you died you travelled to the Otherworld, leaving your bones behind. However, no one knew what you would find once you got there.
I wanted to imagine the awful things that would happen to the King now that he was dead, but I found no joy in it.
I just hoped that somehow Lachlann could find a way to get revenge. That perhaps he could rest easier, knowing that the fairy who killed him no longer drew breath.
The pain of losing Lachlann lingered, but it became easier to live without retreating into my memories. I still remembered Lachlann every day. His smile, his laugh, our love. They would stay with me always.
Aelwen and I stood watching as her children showed Glen and Morven around the sparse garden at the back of the castle, near to where festivals were held.
The Princesses, Elspie and Aoife, were having the time of their lives, pointing out flowers and making up facts as they went along. There was very little of note out here, but they were still managing to make the tour drag on. Prince Elath was shy around the humans, so was content to silently follow them with his father.
The humans were good with the children, and I remembered Morven mentioning that she had two nieces back home in their village.
We were steadily heading into summer now. The Others clearly wanted the two humans to see every inch of the garden as there was not a single cloud in the sky and no sign of rain, for once.
I felt oddly fragile since receiving the news of King Ferchar’s death. The hatred I had spent ten years running on had finally burnt out.
As that hatred burned out, it cauterized the wound that Lachlann’s death had left behind. Finally allowing me to begin healing.
“What shall we do now?” I asked Aelwen, who was smiling, watching her children gesture wildly at trees as if the humans had never seen one before.
“I think perhaps it is time we visit Culhuinn.”
“Surely you are not taking the children?”
“Not the children, I mean you and me. Perhaps it is time you leave this castle.”
“Do you think it is safe?”
My stomach twisted at the thought of leaving Norbroch after so many years. Rather than answering she turned to Tormod, who was also watching the humans.
“Did the messenger tell you anything about the new Queen?”
“The messenger believed that change is coming to Culhuinn, he told me that this new Queen is unlike her father in every way. It was well known that there was no love between the two of them, especially in recent years.” Tormod explained.
Tormod may not have been gifted by the Others, but he was still very skilled. Without having to resort to torture or blackmail he could gain information from people without them realising.
People were always happy to share news with him so he made sure to have a thorough conversation with every messenger who arrived in Norbroch.
“Do you think it’s safe?” I repeated, unsure which answer I was hoping for.
“There is no such thing as safety,” he said dramatically, which made Aelwen laugh. “However, I do think we would survive a journey south. This Queen Freya seems less quick to anger than her father.”
“I think it would be beneficial to pay the new Queen a visit. We can fix the relations between our two kingdoms once and for all. Whilst we are there we can try to prevent any more human children being stolen, for Lachlann,” Aelwen said, and Tormod nodded in agreement.
We went back to silently watching the children and the humans. Glen was now demonstrating his cartwheels to the two girls and the sight was almost enough to startle a laugh from me.
My palms grew sweaty at the thought of leaving Norbroch for Culhuinn, but if I could stop humans from going through what Lachlann did then it would be worth it.
I wanted to see where he lived and worked his whole life. My desire to connect with his early life was much stronger than my fear.
I could tell that Aelwen and Tormod were waiting for my answer and soon I had to break the silence.
“I think we should go,” I blurted out before I could change my mind.
Aelwen wrapped her arm around my shoulders. “We won’t let anything or anyone harm you.”
T o our surprise, Queen Aelwen announced that we would all be heading south to Culhuinn. Beside her at the table Queen Euna was as stony faced, although for once, instead of looking like she was silently simmering with rage, she looked worried.
As if it was eating away at her, distracting her from everything else.
Queen Aelwen explained that with the King and Queen of Culhuinn dead, and Queen Freya now ruling, it was the perfect time to find answers. Possibly even put a stop to the creation of the changelings.
The last time we saw the new Queen Freya she was sitting silently across the table from us. I could not imagine what she would be like as a Queen.
I was excited that finally Glen and I might find the answers we had been searching for, and in doing so save my life. We’d wasted so much time as King Ferchar sent us on a wild goose chase into Norbroch.
I was eager to finally leave this kingdom, and the constant gut churning fear that Queen Euna would decide to imprison us again, forever.
Every step south would take us closer to returning to our village. I longed to see my family again, but I could not dwell on it or else I would cry. I knew Glen felt the same and was desperate to return, especially after his emotional outburst when we were locked in the cell.
The days between the announcement that we would travel south, and us actually leaving to travel south, were long and torturous.
For both Queens to leave the kingdom, plans had to be put in place, which took days. Then food had to be prepared and packed, to ensure that the Queens did not go hungry, and finally they had to pack their belongings and pick which guards would be escorting them on their journey.
Glen informed me that their guard Tormod would be joining us and I could not tell if he was happy or sad about that. After our imprisonment, he seemed to blame Tormod personally, as well as Queen Euna.
He acted like he loathed him, yet he often spoke to him, and told me all about the stories they shared. I had no clue what to think about the two of them.
When we did finally leave the castle behind I was ecstatic. Unlike our journey into Norbroch, we were leaving with full bellies, warm clothes and protection all around us.
The journey seemed to go much faster with company and guides who actually spoke with us. They
were eager to point out farms and distant villages which we had missed on our journey north.
As we travelled I could not help but look over my shoulder, just waiting for the moment Swift would come charging over the hill, ready to kill us.
“He will be long gone,” Glen tried to reassure me.
We were sitting down for a quick meal and allowing the horses to rest. I had still not mastered riding a horse, but fortunately we travelled at a much slower pace with so many guards and servants alongside us.
Glen went to relieve himself and I almost jumped out of my skin when he returned, thinking he was Swift ready to attack.
“He could be anywhere,” I said, feeling shaken. “Hiding in the hills watching us.”
“I’ll tell Tormod that you’re worried, he has guards riding ahead to scout out the landscape and look for danger. If Swift was waiting to attack us they would see him.”
“I thought you hated Tormod?” I accused gently, wanting to change the subject.
“He fascinates me. It’s not every day you get to speak to a fairy and he is more honest than the Queens. Less formal,” he explained and I supposed that it made sense.
Glen had been obsessed with the fairies since we were children. From the very moment he heard about the fairies in the north, with their magical powers and grand castles, he was hooked. Of course he would take the opportunity to speak to a fairy and learn all he could about them.
I felt a little better, knowing that the guards were on the lookout for Swift, but I wasn’t sure I’d get a good night’s sleep until we reached Culhuinn.
We paused for the night, just outside the valley, and I tried my best not to look at the dark, ominous path we would have to travel along in the morning.
Instead, I went off in search of Glen. He had ridden ahead as we travelled and then, in the chaos of setting up camp and getting fires lit, I could not find him.
I tried to tell myself that he was simply lost, but all I could imagine was Swift strangling him. I clambered over the dark jagged rocks, to the spot where Glen and I had planned to sleep for the night, and almost fell to my death in surprise.
The Changeling's Journey Page 26
