by Venice Kelly
“Vanessa.”
His voice pulls me back and I look at Jake when he continues. “Most women don’t leave a man standing there they say something like that. When they confess their devotion to you. I love you and the truth is I never stopped not once. Not when you were driving, not afterwards when you left.”
“I know.”
“So tell me what to do to get an answer out of you. I know you feel the same way I do. If you didn’t you wouldn’t have stayed here. You would have never come home. You would have never come back so I could make this right with you.” He pleads with me and I know he’s right.
I came home to where I was found back to him to us. To the place I always belonged by his side in his arms. Here at the farm making the life we planned together and for the first time since I have come home my fear draws to the back of my mind. It’s not roaring it’s ugly head at me like a lion coming to feast on its prey. Instead it is a silent whisper in the back of my mind as hope settles instead to the forefront. My mouth opens and my voice is steady when I say it back to him.
“I love you too.”
It takes him a few steps to reach me again before he is pulling me into him again. Before his mouth devours mine. It’s everything this moment should be everything that I have been thinking it would be since that night. Moments later when we part I glance up at him knowing that for now I have to stop out reunion. I need to watch Emma finish her run. Finish her year I take Jake’s hand in mine as I drag back to the arena we have an entire life together to plan. For now though I want to watch Emma kick ass and take names.
EPILOGUE
Jake
THREE MONTHS LATER after Emma has loaded up her horse for the summer trophy in hand I watch as Vanessa heads back to the stalls. Right now we still have things to figure out about everything but it feels right. With the prize money the farm will be good until we get the new tenants in that we need. The Harvells have a bit of breathing room for once and I smile knowing that I helped with that. My father and I are still not talking I haven’t seen him since I left work. Vanessa and I spend our days up at the lake house making it ours and head into the farm during the day. Today though I’m tired of taking it slow with her. I’ve taken it slow for the last four years with her. I’ve been apart from her for too long. She wasn’t the only one that was lost it took me a while to figure it out.
I was lost in myself in being a self serving asshole. I was lost in the women and the drinking. I was alone in my guilt and then she came back. Sparking old feelings and giving me a second chance with her. Giving me the closure that I needed with her only something more happened than closure. I realized she was the missing piece, she was my home. I want her to stay there and I smile and wave as Natalie brings out London from the stall and one of the other horses for me. Vanessa is already giving her the death stare before she turns to me.
“You’re up to something aren’t you Jacob Donovan?” She asks halfway between amused and annoyed.
“In order to know that you’re going to have to get on the horse now aren’t you?”
She grins at me for a moment before she lifts herself on to the saddle and I swear watching her mount a horse has to be my favorite pastime and present image. She always belong on them I mount my own and then cast a glance back to Natalie before motioning my gelding to the pasture. I’ve had this moment mapped out in my mind ever since it happened and that memory brings a smile to my face. The day that Hannah helped me pick out the ring when she reassured me that this was what I wanted.
Walking into the jewelry store with my sister in tow I am pretty sure she hasn’t stopped giving me the crazy eye since I told her I needed help with a gift for Vanessa. Alright it is a bigger gift, it’s thee gift you know the one that binds you together. I haven’t told anyone of my plans to marry her just Garrett and while he gave me a half ass approval I’m still nervous as hell. The moment we approach the engagement rings Hannah’s eye swell and get big and she playfully hits my arm.
“Holy shit Jake. This is what you wanted help with?” She asks.
I nod my head at her and look in the glass my eyes zoning in on the perfect princess cut diamond with emeralds on the side. It’s something she would wear, it belongs on her finger and I point to it.
“What do you think about that one?”
“I think you could give Vanessa a gold band and she’d love it.”
“I want it to be right for her. I want to give her everything she deserves. I know you’re leaving for Europe and working for dad will be tough but we can make it work. I need her by my side to make it though.”
“It’s right enough Jake. You two love each other always have and as long as you keep sight of that anything is possible.”
“Jake?” Vanessa asks breaking me out of that memory the one I cherished the most.
The one I would sink into with the dark places when she was gone. I smile back at her by the time we reach the middle of the field and when I dismount to tie my gelding up and she goes to to the same I look at her.
“Let me help you just once alright?” I ask.
She doesn’t fight me and instead hands me London’s reins and I tie her to the same fence. My hands then go to Vanessa’s hips helping her off and watching as she looks out over the mountains and the grass.
“You’re my home Vanessa always have been and it took me way to long to realize that. Don’t make me wait another four years.” I say wrapping my hands around her waist the ring in my palm. I feel her turn to me and her eyes spark with tears and at first I’m gutted not sure if that is her saying no or if I’ve just pushed a boundary neither of us are ready for. Instead she wraps her arms around my neck and nuzzles into my shoulder she doesn’t say anything and my hand runs on her back.
“Still waiting to know if those are good tears or I’m going to kick your ass tears.”
She doesn’t say anything for a moment and the silence ticks away for an eternity before she leans up brushing her lips against mine. I wait with a bated breath for her answer when she leans into my forehead closing her eyes for a moment before opening them and staring into my eyes.
“I’m not lost anymore Jake not as long as I have you. Yes always yes.”
I don’t give her anything else as my mouth crashes into ours and the future that waits.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
FIRST AND FOREMOST to my amazing husband, best friend, father to our son and partner who told me to follow my dream, encouraged it and financially supported it. To the man that told me you want to write a book write it. I have your back, you can do this. Words can’t express how much I love you in this endeavor. I am so lucky God placed you in my life and kept you there. From my long cranky nights after we tucked our son into bed while I plotted and wrote. All the way to the times you watched him when I needed to get that chapter in on my goal. I am an incredibly blessed wife with an amazing support system.
Second to my monkey and favorite little person ever- Mommy loves you! Thank you for having patience while mommy wrote her book. You bring me so much joy and love. I only hope to raise you with your daddy to to be an amazing man one day. You are already on your way and I couldn’t be prouder.
My parents your support and encouragement have been infallible in this journey. I was so nervous about it and about somehow letting you down. But I smiled when I finally told you and you both said: It is about time.
Bex Aaron, my amazing editor and lifelong friend what can I say? Other than you are so gracious and kind. You inspired me to grab this by the horns and ran with it. You let me know when the story was working when it needed improvement and painstakingly edited it. Your friendship over the years has been amazing to say the least and fifteen years later we can finally say we did it.
Thank you to Nalja Quamber and her amazing team at Nalja Quamber Designs for getting my cover perfect! For making the characters of Jake and Vanessa come to life in book form. Not only that for recommending Lindee to me! You are a gem to work with who understands a wri
ter’s hopes, dreams and their story. I can’t wait to do the next one with you and see where it takes you creatively.
Thank you to Lindee Robinson, of Lindee Robinson Photography you are so talented and all your photos are so amazing. You helped narrow down what I was looking for with this book and this couple. I can’t wait for the rest of the series covers with your beautiful images to come out.
To the lovely Marcus and Elena for capturing Jacob and Vanessa in their passion, heartbreak and above everything else their love for one another. I was so happy to find your photoshoot from Lindee the moment I saw you guys I screamed they are it!
Special thanks Christine at Perfectly Publishable who graciously fit me into your schedule when I was on a time crunch and decided I wanted formatting. You took my words and made them graphically jump off the screen and fill various devices with your talent. You made my print books look amazing. I can’t thank you enough!
My betas Quentin, Jami, Sarah and Scott you guys simply rock. You all have been so encouraging over this journey that I took with the novel and for the sequels to this series.
STAY WITH YOU EXCERPT
BOOK TWO IN THE WEST LAKE SERIES
PROLOGUE
Paige
SITTING AT THE airport picking at my nails I look up at the flight board. My parents plane has been delayed for another half an hour. I don’t mind the silence of a few hours to myself honestly. I’ve been in Vanessa’s words avoiding the bigger things in life at the moment like why Shane was caught sneaking out of my house by her a few days ago when she came over to look at wedding shit with me. Airports seem to bring Shane back to the forefront of my thoughts most of the time, airports are kinda our thing over the last few years. He would leave to wherever the Army would send him and I would be the faithful girlfriend that stayed behind to finish out my dreams at school.
I am happy for Jake and Vanessa don’t get me wrong we’ve all been waiting for them to shit or get off the pot since she came home. Now that she has been home for over six months we were all happy when Jake finally put a ring on it. He was planning it before the accident and we all knew it. The accident with Hannah changed things for everyone including me and Shane. I shake my head at the thought smiling at the barista in Starbucks at the airport. I want my damn coffee, as I take out my laptop I at least can get some work done while I’m here. Opening the laptop I look at the screen and the small website I’ve started. I’m closing on my building next week Paige’s Sweets or Paige’s Café I haven’t picked the exact name yet my jury is still out. Culinary school was always my dream and though I took longer than my friends I am glad I have it done.
My parents are well off always have been and while they may have helped with school. I’ve been independent of them since my sophomore year of college. Ok I take that back they gave me the money to get my townhouse down payment when I wanted my own place to finish school. Looking over the site outline I am still torn on which title I like better for my business when I see my phone buzz again.
Hey are you on your way back from the airport yet?
I look at the message from Shane waiting a few seconds till I type out my reply.
Not yet, my parents plane is delayed.
I go to look at the screen again as the three dots appear.
We should probably talk about Vanessa walking in on us the other day. I know you said it’s just friends with benefits. If it’s just that I really need to know.
I look at the phone wondering what he is getting at. Could he have met someone new? It’s not like we are always hooking up. The thought of that happening though brings me back to the here and the now. About the why’s behind this works better for us. No string attached, that was what we wanted wasn’t it? We’ve never had the epic love affair that Vanessa and Jake have. We came back to reality long before that happened.
Some of the guys want to set me up.
I don’t know why that sets my nerves on end but it does. We hook-up we go our separate ways it’s what we’ve bene doing for almost a year. I am pretty certain those guys are not Jake or Austin, instead it is the guys at the firehouse. He should be happy and if he wants to start seeing other people I have no right to be mad or angry about that, let alone jealous.
What do you want to do?
My fingers type out the reply before I go back to the website and fiddle with some notes on it as my phone buzzes again. I look down at the text and stare.
I don’t know. Can we talk about it when you get back from the airport?
My lips form a solid line at the implications that he has laid out as if it is my choice in the matter. I don’t want to trap him if he wants to see other people he can just say so. I look up at the crowd when I hear the clatter and commotion of people cheering and my chest tightens as a solider steps off the escalator. He’s older in an Army uniform, clean cut and shaved he bends down opening his arms wide as his two children run towards him. My throat tightens and I take a few breaths, my right hand coming to the locket on my neck. Looking back at the scene before me I watch as his wife wraps her arms around him and I look away instead at the window to the airport.
Airports used to be our thing they’re not anymore and they haven’t been for a long time. Once my mind has wandered back to the here and the now, the present of it all I allow myself to smile at the family. Just because they are not Shane and I’s thing anymore doesn’t mean they can’t be someone else’s. That that memory shouldn’t be painful for someone else. Life moves on it continues. It’s what I tell myself, as I bury myself in plans of the bakery. It is better than dealing with the other part if it’s moved on, if Shane and I have moved on. Why is it that I’m not happy about it?
