“This is going to kill Katherine. She will be humiliated.”
“She will be able to return to Europe, to England. There, she can say whatever she likes. That he died and she is a widow. But it really is for the best Mil’.”
“I feel so bad for her. I feel bad for them all.”
“Well, now you know. Enough about them, time to focus on us.” He said huskily nuzzling her ear, as she leaned into him - thinking of poor Katherine. She drew up from the warm breath that caressed her nape.
“Charles…” She drawled.
“What?” He returned pecking with soft kisses at her throat.
“How can you be wanting that at a time like this. Don’t you feel bad?”
“Shhh, I feel bad that Manny has gotten such a head start on me with the babies. I think it is time we started on one of our own.” He muttered in the cleavage of her dress.
Mildred smiled knowingly, becoming lost in her husband’s attention.
“But sweetheart…we…already…have…” He stiffened with his hand at her small breast, slowly lifting himself from her cleavage to look into her eyes. Taking his hand from her breast and placing it at her cheek.
“Are you certain?” He asked in awe.
“Very — certain.”
“You sneaky, little adorable, minx! Do you know how much I love you?”
“If it is only a drop of what I feel for you, I am overwhelmed with joy.” She declared tearfully. He shook his head in wonder at her. “How wrong you are my lovely wife. How very wrong indeed.”
“It is not a drop I wish to rain upon you, but a torrent…a storm meant to drown you in the love I hold for you.” He pressed her hand to his hammering heart, pulling her mouth to his, and there he laid her down and made tender love to her, that his actions might add weight to his words.
* * *
That night back at Webster Fields…
Within Lena’s cabin, the small family of three lay on the bed, with Hope between them as Manny entertained them with stories of things he’d seen at sea. He was describing to Hope, what an ocean looked like. “It’s a great body of water, stretching as far as the eye can see, and is a spectacular blue/green like hmmm-…?” He tried to think of something that color, when Lena inserted softly, “The color of - your daddy’s eyes - that color baby.”
Hope smiled rising to turn and look deep into her father’s eyes, while those same eyes were gazing with so much love into her mother’s. “Is li’yo’ eyes m’daddy?” She asked trying to get his attention away from her mother, his fingers caressing the long loose strands of Lena’s hair, wanting nothing more right then, than to kiss her deeply. Manny blushed at her question, “I guess - if mommy says so.” He conceded with a smile. “In that ocean, are big big fish that come up from the water to breathe, and they are called whales.”
“Wha’s a whay?” Hope asked, now kneeling between her parents as they lay in each other’s arms against the headboard. “A big big fish.” Lena supplied simpering. “Wh’day in’na ocean - if ‘dey can’breath - m’daddy?”
“Because they have no legs to walk on land, so they swim in the ocean to get around.” Manny explained.
“B’dey can’breath m’daddy!” She shook her head as if it made no sense to her. “They can hold their breath for a long time, but then they have to come back up, breathe real deep, then they can go back to swimming again.” Lena explained.
Hope gave her a look as though to say, ‘I’m talking to my daddy.’ Followed by saying it, “Mommy! I’talkin t’m’daddy.” She fussed with a frown.
Manny burst with laughter, hugging her to him as he kissed into her neck tickling her. “Lord…you know she and I won’t be getting along later, you do know that?” Lena joked.
Manny was still grinning, “She’s daddy’s lil’princess, aren’t you darling’?” Manny murmured kissing her. She made a face looking at Lena, then leaned over hugging her mother. “I m’mommy too. I luf’ you.” Lena pulled her into her arms hugging her.
He leaned towards them both, placing his arm over them to gather Lena into his side, with their daughter laying on her chest. “I know you do baby. I know…” Lena broke off unable to say anymore, choked up.
“What’s wrong?” He asked softly, nudging them both.
“Wh’wron’ mommy?” Hope asked as well, copying her father.
Lena’s heart was pounding as more tears pushed the others over the edge, she couldn’t help thinking about her son. “Where is our son Manny? What is happening to him? He should be…” Again she stopped.
Manny sighed resting his chin lightly on her head as his daughter wiped her mother’s tears away. Suddenly all of Hope’s questions stopped in the face of her mother’s sadness, leaning forward, she comforted her. “D’cry, I’luf’you.” Lena wiped at her own tears as Manny lay with them quiet and thinking.
“I think it’s time for me to do what we’ve discussed.” He began softly.
Lena knew what he was speaking of, he would leave to get the ship. Upon his return, they would leave together, as he filed for divorce through Charles. As he worked his merchant business, they would live on the ‘Princess Ceś alena’, never to be separated again. And somewhere, they would find someone who would join them in marriage. That was now an urgency for Manny, he didn’t want to delay another moment.
“Leon and I will prepare to leave tomorrow. Then I will see what progress has been made in locating him while I’m gone.” He continued.
She nodded her head in understanding, not wanting to speak just yet. Hope was lying with her head on her chest, yawning contentedly, nestled safely in the embrace of her parents, as their voices lulled her to sleep. The deep timbre of her father’s voice, speaking in low tones and that of her mother, in reply as she stroked Hope’s back soothingly. “I’m glad you won’t be alone. That Leon will be with you.” She smiled. Manny chuckled. “Yes, my oldest son. He’s coming with us you know?” Lena nodded. “How could we leave without him?” She replied. “Are you going to be alright with me gone?” Manny asked after kissing his daughter’s head, following another yawn. “We’ll be fine. I’ll miss you terribly. So will she.”
“I don’t know. I hate the thought of leaving you. I never want us separated again.” Manny admitted, squeezing her gently to him. “It’s alright, it’s not like you haven’t left before, we were here two years and just fine. With every return, I’ve been here…waiting, as I will this time.”
“I know. I just… I don’t like it. But, I can get where I’m going a lot faster on horse back. I will take Leon to the ship and let him get things ready there, while I check about our son. He can get to know the crew, and familiarize himself with the ship.”
“I can’t wait to bring it back…oh Lena, wait till you see her! What a magnificent sight she is! Built with specific instructions giving attention to size; it won’t be the fastest vessel on water, but she’s as sturdy as they come. She’s even equipped with guns.”
“Oh Manny…guns?”
“Sweetheart, the sea is a beautiful place, nevertheless there are dangers as well. The crew that will be manning it…let’s just say, any that cross our path will be reluctant to bother us, and should they do so…they will regret ever making such a decision.”
“I don’t care. I’ll face any dangers, as long as I can be with you. That’s all that matters.” She declared with all the love she felt for him shining in her eyes. Manny leaned down and kissed her softly. “I love you. You are everything to me. You, and my children.” He vowed passionately, laying his hand on their daughter’s back as she slept.
“I don’t know, sometimes I feel such…”
“What?”
“Katherine. After all that she’s done, I can’t help feeling sorry for her. To be in her shoes right now. It bothers me - what this has done to her life.”
“You have no reason to feel that, she is my doing. There is no one to blame but myself. I should have never married her. Just so you know, I’ve given her a very
large settlement, financially - she’ll want for nothing. I’ve also posted a long and detailed letter to her mother, explaining all; apologizing - and letting her know that her daughter would need her.” He sighed, feeling overwhelmed by regret. “I should have fought my father tooth and nail, and none of the things we’re suffering would have happened. You just promise me this.” He asked, tilting her chin up with the bend of his fingers to look into her eyes. “First thing, I know this goes without saying, while I’m gone; stay away from her at all cost. Whatever you did to keep Hope hidden, do so again.” He cautioned.
“I know Manny, of course I will.” Lena agreed softly.
“I had to say it, I feel so uneasy with leaving you. The second thing is this, no matter what - you will never lose faith in me…in us. You will know beyond any doubts ever - that I love you as no man has ever loved another. Nothing, outside of death…will keep me from you? Promise me, you will hold that close to your heart, and never let it go.”
“I promise.” She swore.
“You - are my wife. You. No matter what the world says, no matter what laws prohibit it…you are my wife. For me, there will never be another.” Again, he lowered his mouth to hers, lingering unhurriedly, tasting and savoring all that was between them.
Eyes filled with tears watched them as they lay in their lovers embrace. So picturesquely perfect. Shrouded in darkness, hidden from view, Katherine felt her heart break over and over again, shattered for the final time; devastated beyond repair.
She had come home in hopes of talking to him; to at least come to some kind of happy medium where they could work out a plan to return to some semblance of a marriage. On stepping from the carriage, and up to the porch she stopped for no particular reason, other than she could go no further. Doing something she’d never done before, she turned and as if being led, walked quietly around the mansion to the side yard, and onward still across the main lane until she stood at Lena’s cabin.
There at the steps, she’d stopped. Unsure of what she would say to her, she turned walking to the back side of the cabin, and up to her window. Where she stood now, utterly destroyed. She was shocked to hear him talking to Lena’s child, stunned even more so by a child that should not be. Blown away hearing his talk of fatherly affection and gentleness to the little girl that was his own.
As if in a bad dream, her sights locked onto her noting all of her attributes, the silky golden tresses waving amidst hundreds of curls, reaching her center back; the smooth olive skin; the voice of a baby, calling him by the title, daddy. The child was a complete blend of the two people she now stared at. There was no doubt to whom she belonged. Although she couldn’t hear all they were saying, speaking in the soft intimate whispers that they were, she didn’t need to hear them to know. The child Hope who was not supposed to be, was! She remembered overhearing them discuss her name once.
‘Hope — Hope!’
They’d tricked her!
All this time she had been harboring fanciful ideas of possibly gaining his attention and mending the rift between them. Of fixing a marriage that had been doomed from the start. All at once, every warning given to her came to mind. ‘He used me. Used me! Just so he could - cohabit freely with his concubine slave!’ She steamed in realization. ‘All this time! All this wasted time! There was never any chance for us! You used me Maynard Webster! You used me!’ Anger shot through her making her tremble. She turned from the window having seen enough. All of her life, she had been good enough to use, but never good enough to love.
‘Using me! Using me! Using me! Never loving me! Just using me!’ She thought storming back to the mansion. ‘Use me and then cast me aside. Never again, never ever again will a man use me and toss me aside. Never again… Never again!’
The next day…Manny and Leon left for Boston.
Chapter Eighteen
JACKSON, MISSISSIPPI…
Two weeks after Manny’s leaving, once again the women - Mildred, this time with her mother, and Katherine found their way to Jackson. There they sat in a restaurant taking a much needed break from picking up the items they’d ordered on the previous journey there, when only Katherine, Mildred and Charles went.
“Here is your tea ladies, your orders will be ready shortly.”
“Thank you, we’re in no hurry, take your time.” Mildred replied to the waitress as they’d stopped to eat and rest. Katherine sat staring in the distance, with no interest in the trip to Jackson or anything else for that matter. Realizing this, Mildred insisted she come as a means to keep her busy until things she knew were about to take place started happening. Just as her husband explained that he would, Manny left. It was only a matter of time now before they would have to console Katherine over the divorce once it was filed and became public knowledge.
“Come on Katherine, don’t look so glum.”
“I can’t help it. She has destroyed my life, my happiness, my marriage - she has all the things that rightly should be mine. My husband and his child - I hate her Mil’. When I see her walking about with not a care in the world, I could claw her eyes out.”
“Katherine!! Don’t say such a thing. I know you’re hurting, but -(she sighed)- you can’t change things. You can’t…make him love you. No more than you can make him stop loving her. It’s a hard thing to face - but… the time has come to leave it alone.” Mildred advised, unsure of how much Katherine knew. She and her mother had been stunned when she’d come to them telling of her discovery. Helene had maintained her silence where her opinion was concerned. She had felt sorry for her niece and all that she was going through, yet she had been warned. Even so, she wasn’t going to heap more coals on the fires of her humiliation by reminding her of that fact. Yet, she had no knowledge that Manny was divorcing her as well. True to her word, Mildred was unwilling to disclose anything shared by her husband, nothing could get her to betray his trust, family or not.
“Well that surprises me, coming from you?” Helene remarked.
“I realize now, after what she saw - that it is a battle that cannot be won.” Mildred replied to her mother, then said to Katherine. “You are young and beautiful, let him go Katherine. Divorce him!”
“Mildred!!” Helene blurted her name shocked. “I cannot believe you’re suggesting such a thing, when I advised it - you were stunned!”
Helene reminded her. Mildred sighed, at the time it had been shocking to hear such a thing, but now, she knew what Manny’s plans were. She thought if Katherine was going to redeem the smallest shred of her dignity, she would advise her to do the filing first. Of course she couldn’t tell her that Manny was already doing so…but she knew that if Katherine did so, it would be a relief to him from having to do it and would leave her with some dignity.
“That was then, when I believed they could make it work. I know better now. It is a marriage that has only brought her heartache and pain.”
“Well had she done so when I suggested it, it might have saved her that much more!” Helene blasted – unable to restrain that much.
“Maybe, but she had to be sure first and now she is.” Mildred defended. Katherine was looking at her as the idea took root. “You know what, I think I will. Why should I sit around waiting for his scraps to be tossed at me? I think that is a good idea.”
“Yes! We shall see to it immediately!” Helene cheered, finally relieved.
“I agree with mother, the sooner, the better…that will show him!”
“Oh the scandal it will cause him! It is what he deserves!” Katherine proclaimed getting revved up to bring him the humiliation he served her.
“Yes it is! And through it all, you can hold your head high!” Mildred agreed tartly.
“It’s a good thing that my Mildred married Charles Wilson! I’m certain he will see to this matter for you! You will talk to him, won’t you Mildred?”
“Of course I will. I’m sure he’ll do it.”
“Are you sure? They are close friends.” Katherine asked in doubt.
“But
you are family!” Mildred assured her.
Helene shook her head. “Divorce! In our family…surely it is a sign of the times…” She moaned at the thought of the scandal, knowing even so…it was the right thing to do.
“Time! Oh no, his watch! The one I was having engraved for him, I almost forgot it. I must get there before the shop closes.” Mildred cut her mother off as her declaration served as a reminder. “Please excuse me Katherine, mother, but I must get there. I’ll be right back.” She was up and out of her seat, heading for the exit.
Aunt and niece sat silent a moment, until Helene cleared her throat. “I will return shortly sweetheart. If you will excuse me?” Helene announced moving her chair back unable to hold her bladder a moment more. Sitting alone, Katherine sulked in her bitter anger. ‘Yes, I will divorce you. As soon as I can arrange it. I will show you Maynard Webster!’ She brooded with the idea, wishing she had some other way as well of getting back at him for the heartache and shame he’d caused her. She sat viewing the people around her. Some couples sat laughing and talking, other’s quietly mumbled around her of their love and life no doubt. Suddenly she conjured a scene of Manny and Lena, doing the same. Laughing and loving…happy that she was gone from them. That is when she knew it was not enough to just humiliate him with a divorce, there had to be something more she could do. Something more she would do.
‘I may not have him…but neither will you. I will get you out of his life - Ceś alena…I will, GOD is my witness I will.’ She declared with all the passion of her hatred for them.
“I’m tired, bone tired…weeks and weeks, and still nothing.”
Princess Ces'alena (Webster Fields) Page 58
