“Know how I know, that he didn’t, love me? He never came for me. I wanted him to come for me and I prayed and prayed and prayed…daddy please, come for me…please, come for me. But he never came. He never came.” Her tears were rolling down her face and dropping off of her chin and like flipping a switch, she changed again and started laughing at herself. “You know why you silly plunker, because he’s dead…he couldn’t come!” The smile slid. “Nicholas – LéClare, the man my mother married. He became my father - he - he loved me, he - loved me Lena. Not like…Manny loves her.” She turned back to Hope. Once again she stared and back to Lena. “Not like that… but - he loved me, over and over and …” Lena thought she would collapse into tears the way that she spoke. “…touching me like that…I didn’t want him too! I hated it…but - he said… he said he loved me.” She didn’t realize she was whimpering and crying.
“I hated touching that on him! Oooh!” She shuddered. “I hated touching - it!” Shuddering again wiping her hands on her dress. As if she realized what she was saying and who she said it in front of, she stopped. Saying no more, she stared through Lena, who was trying to control her reaction. Katherine’s nose ran, she sniffed lightly. A roll of thunder snapped Katherine out of it. Lena couldn’t believe that Margaret LéClare, the woman she met and respected, let such a thing happen to her daughter. As she stood with that thought, Katherine slipped back to her old self again as she refocused on Lena.
“It’s time for you to go. You must gather your things together and go! You’ve ruined so much! This can no longer be tolerated.” She told her so calm and business like; the switch took Lena’s breath away. “Don’t look at me like that! It’s really simple! If you would go away - then Manny and I could have a better chance of working things out! You simply cannot stay a moment more! Things will never turn around for us with you always present tempting him! It’s really not his fault! He’s torn! You can understand that - surely you can?!”
“Oh Katherine please… I’m sorry about your pas-…”
“Don’t say it!! Shut up!! You don’t care about me! What you’ve done to me! What you’ve done to my life! My marriage! Sleeping with my husband! My husband!!” Katherine snapped yelling. “You think you’re better than me!” She snarled disdainfully. “You’re nothing! The sooner we’re rid of you, the better! Now get your things together! I want you out of here tonight!”
‘Oh God help me. What’ll I do? What do I do?’ Lena prayed wiping at her tears, just realizing their falling. Never had she felt so guilty as she did then for having a part in hurting this woman further… although unintentionally. She stood shaking, afraid, ill and weak, with no strength for what Katherine was demanding of her.
“Katherine please, where am I to go? Can I not leave tomorrow?”
“Did you hear me? Tonight! I want you out of here tonight!”
“But where?”
“That’s your problem — I care not where, as long as it’s from here!” She clipped sharply, then inserted. “Besides, I’m not as heartless as you may believe me. I’ve seen to a place for you. You see, you no longer belong to Manny. I’ve sold you! You belong to a Mr. Harold Casey now. You are his property! And he’s waiting for you at the crossroads! So you must hurry — come now…gather your things!” Lena looked at her incredulously. “You can’t do that! You can’t sell me! I’m fr-…” She almost blurted that she was free. Manny had given her papers saying so this time. Papers from Charles stating Hope as his legal daughter, and Michael as his son…if Katherine knew of them there was no telling what she would do with them.
Afraid of disclosing that, Lena broke off and said instead, “I belong to Manny!”
“As his wife - acting in his behalf while he is absent, I have the right to sell you! You – are - sold!! Gather your things!”
Lena was shaking, she gripped the door afraid of passing out.
“Would you rather he came and picked you up? I’m being fair this time. You get to take your bastard with you. Actually, I’m cheating myself - think of what I might get for her should I sell her separate from you. A little mulatto like her, men would pay thousands to have her!”
“Oh my God! You’re insane! Why are you taking your pain out on my daughter! She’s done nothing to you! You won’t get away with it this time - Mann-…”
“You whore!! You whoring slut!! Don’t you dare tell me what I won’t get away with! I want you off of this plantation! If you don’t leave on your own! I will have your new owner fetch you from here! There won’t be a bloody thing your, ‘White Knight in shining armor’ can do about it! Because he’s gone!”
“This won’t help you win Manny’s-…”
Katherine rushed her and slapped her as hard as she could. Lena rolled to the side staggering from the blow. Rage surged in her, as she stumbled back against the wall to regain her balance. She reached up touching the blood she tasted from her tooth splitting her lip. It took everything in her to restrain from retaliating, attacking her.
“I dare you to strike me back!” Katherine boldly stated, breathing hard. “Not so brave now – are you?! I’ll take her from you so fast and sell her -she’ll be as lost to you as your other bastard!” She promised with hate filled eyes. “Now gather your things!”
Lena stood with tears of anger filling her eyes.
“What will it be? Don’t think you can hide away somewhere here or any where near here for that matter. I’ve explained everything to Mr. Casey, and he’s not beyond bringing out the dogs to track you. He will find you, and should he do so-…” She smiled. “You - will - lose - your Hope.” She then stepped aside. “Hurry Lena, time is running out for you.”
Lena stepped away from the door, and regardless of the threat of being struck again, she stated boldly. “Manny loves me. He’ll come looking for us.”
“Oh he will. I’m certain of it. But soon he will tire. He’ll come back home - to me, and I’ll be waiting for him. Look at it this way, at least you’ll have your Hope, if not him. I did at least leave you with that.”
“So now… you have only a few minutes to get your things and be out at that crossroad where your new master waits for you.”
Again, the urge to attack her surged up in Lena, she couldn’t believe she had actually felt sorry for her.
“Looking at me that way is a waste of precious time. Don’t think to alarm anyone. He has papers on you. The law will side with him, and even if they should wait for Manny, by the time I get through filling them in on all the problems you’ve caused here…you’ll be sorry you fell in the hands of the law – I’ll put everything I can think of out there for all to know and hear. What then, would become of Webster Fields, Manny – hm?” She grabbed the door and opened it, stopping there as the wind blew within, now mixed with drizzles of rain. “I’ll be watching, and waiting…be careful of the decisions you make – the wrong one could cost you your Hope … besides, we both know what can happen to a runaway. He’ll not make it back in time, to save you. After all…where is Mi-key?” She taunted, then left. Lena stood inside her cabin as the night stormed around her with Katherine’s last parting words.
She suddenly dashed for the bucket in the corner of the kitchen, throwing up, she thought the heaving would tear her stomach from within. It took a few minutes before the vomiting subsided and the gagging to cease. Her legs trembled in an effort to hold her up. Lightning flashed, and a moment later, thunder rolled.
She stood leaning against the cupboard there, with no idea what she would do. One thing was certain, leaving was absolute. ‘I have nothing God. What do I do? What do I do? Who is this Harold Casey? I will not go to him! I will not! But where will I?’ She thought in a panic, logical thought scattered by her fear, then suddenly it came to her. ‘Red Dawn! Yes! I’ll go to her!’ Pushing away from the counter, something occurred to her. “Oh no. She’s not at the village anymore. She’s at her father’s plantation! I don’t know the way there and - Jordan! Yes…Jordan.” She realized that he would know. “I
just have to stay calm. I can get through this. I just have to find a way to hide away safe until Manny returns.” She coached herself as she went to the bed where her daughter lay sleeping. Unwanted panic seized and a sob erupted. “Mannieee, oh God, Manny I need you…I need you.” She cried bending over holding her stomach from the pain, as she sat on the bed. Closing her eyes and rocking as if she could send the message to him somehow. The rocking was making her dizzy and she sat up looking at Hope.
“Hope! Baby…wake up.” She sat at the edge of the bed pulling Hope’s limp body into her arms to wake her, but she only ended up hugging her close as she began crying again. She sobbed until she fought to breathe, realizing once again she was wasting time.
A vision came to her of some fierce white man barging into her cabin, dragging her away, as Katherine held onto Hope as she screamed for Lena. The horror of the picture spurred Lena into action. She laid her daughter on the bed, and grabbed up the sheet on it. She rushed around the cabin grabbing things they would need; clothing for Hope, and a few things for herself. She stopped at her vanity, and grabbed her comb and brush set that Michael had given her as a Christmas gift, and the papers Manny gave her lay underneath, she took them as well. Afterwards she pulled the four corners together and tied them into a knot.
Quickly she dressed in one of her gowns, stockings and shoes, next snatching her cloak from the hook. She took down Hope’s as well, putting it on her. Then grabbed a blanket from the bed Hope never slept in to cover her from the weather. Hope stirred, yawing.
“Wh’goin’mommy?” Her little toes wiggled and Lena folded the blanket over her feet.
“Shhh, go back to sleep. We’re going to visit Red Dawn, alright …come on.” Lena explained quietly, hefting her daughter up to lay on her shoulder, making sure her head was covered. Passing the bundle on the floor, she dipped picking it up, hooking it on her arm she rushed for the door.
“We go’ta m’daddy mommy?” Hope asked sleepily through the folds of the blanket as Lena pulled the door open. The wind pushed at her, sending her cloak up and out behind her like wings. “No Hope…daddy’s gone bye-bye remember?” The rain was coming down wetting her face as she fumbled with her hood. Between holding Hope and the sack she couldn’t pull it up, so she left it down and dashed out into the night. Holding onto her daughter and the bundle almost undid her. She felt too weak to carry them but knew she had to go where Katherine could see her leaving.
True to her words, Katherine was on the front porch near the door watching for her. Lena knew she must keep moving towards the road in order for Katherine to believe she was heading where she told her. With the darkness around her, she turned off just short of the road and wound her way through the dense trees, then started doubling back towards the slaves quarters. She was tiring as the rain soaked her through. “Mommieee…mommieee, wh’goin’?”
“Sh-sh Hope.” Lena gasped leaning against a tree. Lightning lit the skies again showing her the woods around her. She had to rest for just a moment. Shaking the fuzz from her head, she knew she had a long walk ahead of her to make it to Jordan’s cabin, and time was not on her side. She pushed off of the tree and started through the woods. The soft soil, wet cloak and heavy skirt was making every step a chore.
She was scared to death that she would stumble to her knees and not be able to rise again, so kept leaning at various trees every time she tired beyond her endurance. The further she went, the heavier everything became. Hope was getting heavier and heavier on her arm, and she had to stop and switch her to the other arm, while switching the sack over. She didn’t know how long she’d walked, rested, walked, rested, and walked some more. But it seemed she would never make it to Jordan’s cabin. Hope was whimpering and crying by the time she saw a cabin. She made it to the first cabin, then leaned against it gasping from exhaustion. “Mommieee… mommy, I wan’ m’daddy… I wan’ m’daddy.” Hope cried.
“Alright … alright…just - give me - just…” She gulped. Getting to Jordan’s seemed to take forever as she started up again. Mud was now sucking at her feet. She slid once and thought she would go down. Hope cried out, grabbing her mother tightly. “Oh God…” Lena whimpered. She stopped and stood breathing hard in the rain. Then started moving again. Finally she reached more cabins. She stopped and leaned at the first…breathing deep and hard. Just two more cabins and she would be at Jordan’s. Licking at the rain water that washed down her face, she blinked her eyes to see. ‘Just two more…just two more.’ She chanted. She leaned off the cabin and almost tilted over, and had to lean back again not to drop Hope.
“Mommieee…” Hope cried trying to lean up and see out of the blanket. “No Hope…stay baby…stay still…please…stay still.” This time she rolled and walked along the cabin instead of trying to walk unaided. By the time she got to Jordan’s cabin and made it to his front porch, her arms were ready to give way. She plopped Hope and the sack on the edge of the porch, laying there to rest, Hope pushed away from her mother.
“Knock — knock on the door baby…hurry.” Lena gasped, instructing her daughter. Hope stood pulling the wet blanket from her, fighting with her hood as she walked to the door. Her little fist pounding.
“Jo’an…Jo’an…Jo’an!”
Trying to catch her breath, sucking air deeply into her burning lungs, Lena climbed up and crawled across the porch to lean against the door. She reached over and knocked harder. It took a few minutes, but finally the door opened. Jean looked out, then down.
“What the — Jordan! Get up!!” She shouted right away picking Hope up bringing her in out of the rain, and setting her down. Then rushed back out to Lena who was trying to stand. “Get my sack.” She instructed her. Jean turned from Lena, then reached for the sack and came back to her.
By then, Jordan was there.
“Lena!” Jordan called reaching down and pulling her to her feet to bring her in, with Jean behind them with the sack.
“Wha’s goin’ on! What you doin’ out’na rain!” He asked stunned.
“I need your - your help. Katherine knows - she’s making me leave!” Lena gasped. Jean was taking Hope’s cloak off when Lena yelled, “No! Leave her, we have to go! Jordan I need you to take me to Re-…Josey…Josephine O’Brien!”
“Josephine? How you know ha’?” Jordan asked, not realizing the two women were acquainted; because Lena kept the details of her visits concerning the Indian village and who she met there to herself. “I’ll explain later…there’s no time now. Please, I need you to take me to her. To Harvest Gold.”
“You stay right here! We’a protect you.” He said, unaware of all that transpired between Lena and Katherine.
“No…Jordan, there’s no time! Believe me…I can’t stay here! Please please! Believe me when I say, I have to go! If I’m caught on this plantation she’ll cause all kinds of trouble and take Hope from me.”
“The hell she will!” He shot angrily.
“Jordan listen to me. Listen closely. I have - to go! There’s nothing - you can do to protect me - not without Manny here! Take me to Josephine! Now! Please!”
Jordan felt his anger rise, “Goddamn that Manny! He should’ah took you wit’em! It’s happenin’ again! It’s happenin’ again!” He fussed, so mad he felt rage building. Lena thought she would scream from frustration.
“Jordan please, come on. We have to leave - now!” Jean sat holding Hope, her eyes filled with sympathy for Lena. Suddenly the rain turned from pouring to a torrent outside, the sounds of all the drops pummeling the roof loud and heavy. He looked up then down to Lena, and shaking his head, rushed into the back room of his cabin and hurried into his clothes.
When he came out, he was still dressing. “Maybe we aught’ah go to Masta’ Morris – he might-…”
“Jordan no! I cannot – I will not take any chances! Besides, he doesn’t like me! Get me to Josey, do that, we’ll be okay.”
He shook his head, “You wait here while I go saddle a horse, I come for ya’.” He said steppin
g into his work boots, donning his hat and his over coat.
“No…there’s no time for that. I’ll come with you. We’ll leave from the barn.” Lena corrected him. “It’s po’in down out there!” He stated the obvious. Lena ignored him and went to grab Hope. As soon as she lifted her, she dropped to her knees, weak.
“Move.” Jordan reached over Lena and picked up Hope, then turned and grabbed the sack. “Can’ya make it?” He asked back at her. Lena pushed herself to her feet. “I have no choice…let’s go.”
They crept through the rain and dark night towards the stable as the downpour drenched them. All relieved to get inside the barn where Jordan sat Hope and the sack down and went for a lantern, lighting it. Lena stood by the barn door waiting as Jordan made quick work of saddling a horse.
Her heart pounding in fear, so afraid Katherine and her new master were already on her tail. He led a horse out and up to them, picking up the sack and tying it to the back of the horse. “Come on.” He called to Lena, lifting her into the saddle, then turned picking Hope up, giving her to her mother. “You hol’ onto this horse, don’t let go, keep ha’ under them blankets.” He instructed. Lena nodded, she didn’t have to be told. He went back for his own horse, leading it past them out of the barn, then led their horse out and closed the barn door. He climbed on his horse and grabbed the reigns to the one Lena and Hope sat upon. Lena wrapped her cloak around Hope even tighter trying to keep the rain from pelting her.
Soon they were on their way around the barn to take the back field toward Harvest Gold. Occasional lightning from the storm lit their way. Lena prayed all the way, while holding Hope close to her, with Jordan holding onto her horse so she could keep her baby protected as she hummed to her praying that she not get sick from the drenching, her body temperature keeping her warm.
Princess Ces'alena (Webster Fields) Page 60
