“Our little girl would be six,” Tim says.
“Yes, she would have been.”
“Is she all right?” Sue asks.
“She will be. Hopefully, she’ll be down soon.” I look at my watch again.
“I should go up and check on her,” Sue says as she stands.
“I’m all right, Mom.” I turn around and Leah is standing behind me. Her eyes are red and swollen and she looks pale. “We need to leave if we want to make it on time.”
Leah
I decided to wear a simple gray color dress today with long sleeves today. Robert is wearing a gray suit and a pink tie. I know the pink tie is for Jamie. I carry a small gift wrapped in birthday balloon wrapping paper with a white bow. “I hope Chelsea and Drake let her have the gift we bought for her.”
“I don’t think it’ll be a problem,” Robert lies.
“I need to use the restroom again,” I say as I hand Robert the gift.
“Leah, we’ll be late.”
“I’ll hurry.”
At the courthouse, I go into the bathroom yet again. Chelsea is walking out. Her eyes are also red and swollen and I know she feels like I do. I dry heave and then splash some water on my face. I can’t do this. I can’t go in there and deal with this. I hold back the sobs that threaten to escape my mouth.
A knock sounds at the door and I know it’s Robert. I take some deep breaths and open the door to face him. He tries to smile, but I can see the fear in his eyes, or is sadness? I can’t be sure. Probably a little of both.
We walk into the small courtroom and Bruce is already at the front table. I look to the left and Chelsea, Drake, and Madison is there with their attorney. The other only people in the courtroom are the men I recognize from the meeting who were representing the hospital. The courtroom must be closed to spectators as well.
Robert holds my hand as he walks me towards the front of the room. I feel like crying, I feel like throwing up and I feel like passing out all at the same time. Madison looks back at us when the heavy wooden door closes. Drake and Chelsea keep their attention straight ahead. I try to smile at her when our eyes meet, but she doesn’t smile. She looks frightened.
Bruce stands and greets us. He pulls out a chair for me. Robert sits on one side and Bruce sits on my other side. They are talking, but I can’t hear them. The sound of blood rushing through my veins echoes in my ears. My heartbeat is pounding and my palms are sweaty. I can’t breathe.
Someone enters the courtroom and we all stand. Robert helps me and Bruce holds on to my other arm. The judge walks in and takes his seat. I hear Chelsea begin to cry. I want to cry, too. I want to look over at her and tell her this will all be okay, but I can’t. How can it be okay? How is this going to work out to benefit anyone? If we get Madison, she’ll lose the only parents she has ever known. If they get her, she’ll miss out on all the love Robert and I have for her. I keep facing straight ahead and look at the older man in a black robe.
He talks about the baby swap and he expresses sympathy to everyone on behalf of the court. He looks at us and then to Drake and Chelsea as he gives us his condolences on losing Jamie. Chelsea and I both sob. Robert holds my hand tightly under the table. I try so hard to focus on his touch, but it’s useless. I tap my foot repeatedly on the floor unaware I am doing it until Robert tries to calm my leg with his hand.
“It’ll be all right, Leah,” he coos in my ear.
I nod but continue to cry. I don’t believe him. The black cloud is over my head. I swear I think it is smiling at me. It knows I am so close to letting go and letting it claim me. I remember how the medicine numbed me. I liked that feeling. I wish I were numbed right now. I don’t want to feel this pain, Chelsea’s pain. It’s Jamie and Madison’s birthday. Shouldn’t we all be at a birthday party celebrating? No, there is no celebrating for us. When we leave here, we’ll go to the cemetery to grieve our precious daughter.
I hear Drake talking and he talks about how much he loves Madison. He speaks about family vacations and long weekends they take together. I hear his voice cracks and it pulls at my heart strings. He talks about games, and tea parties, and family fun nights the family has. Chelsea talks between sobs about reading stories and playing dress up with Madison. She says her life wasn’t fulfilled until she had Madison. Madison speaks softly, almost in a whisper. She says she loves her Mommy and Daddy and her brother. I cry.
They love her. I never doubted that. If we get Madison, they’ll grieve the loss of Madison. I see now, it’ll be a different loss, but it’s still a painful and permanent loss all the same. I finally look over at Drake is trying to console his wife and his daughter. His daughter. Our daughter. Madison cries. She loves them. She called them Mommy and Daddy. How can I take her from them? She’s our daughter. She belongs with us. We will love her just as much as they do. I already do.
Next, it’s Robert’s turn to talk. He stands and I stand with him. We are a family and together we’ll stand as one. He is my rock and I have to be strong for him. I sniffle and wipe the tears from my eyes. I hold his hand and stand tall beside him. He tells the judge about reading Jamie nightly bedtime stories, he says how Jamie was his girl although she was my girl, too. I laugh through tears. He adds that if he could have died in that accident instead of Jamie, he would have. He wipes his tears away and I cry harder. I hate when he says that because I know it’s the truth. He would have given his life to save hers a thousand times over. I hear Chelsea cry and I can’t take it.
The judge gives me a minute before I have to speak. Robert continues to stand with me. “I loved her from the first time I saw her,” I say. I will myself to be strong. “Jamie was beautiful, and funny, and sweet. She had a stuffed rabbit that she named Jack, which she took everywhere she went. Her room is just as she left it the day that she died. It’ll be three years this month and we still can’t go in and pack her things away,” I cry. “Today is her sixth birthday and instead of celebrating her birth, we’ll be at the cemetery mourning her loss.”
I take a deep breath and say, “Today is Madison’s birthday, too, and we would like for her to have this.” I take the small wrapped gift and place it at the end of the table for Madison to see. I smile at her through blurred vision. I look back to the judge and say, “Madison is our biological daughter and we don’t need to know her to love her. I know this entire nightmare had taken its toll on all of us. I have no idea how a baby swap could have happened, but I do know that we parents are left to deal with this mess. We mourn the loss of our daughter Jamie, and we long to know and love our biological daughter Madison.”
“I don’t have a quick fix to resolve this… I don’t even have the right word to describe it, but I hope you don’t punish Robert and me for the hospital's negligence. Madison is our biological daughter, and we have a right to have her.”
Robert and I sit down and he squeezes my hand. Bruce pats the top of my right hand.
“Would the bailiff see that Miss Madison gets her birthday gift from the Grethers?” The judge called us Grethers, this can’t be good. The gushing sound has returned in my ears. The judge says, "Mrs. Grether was right: The hospital was very negligent and the families are left to sort it out. I understand that the person responsible for this was the charge nurse and that Melissa Simms is now under psychiatric care for her mental illness.” He look behind us at the men from the hospital and says, “Good.”
“I want to apologize in advance because no matter what, someone is going to get hurt. There is only one living child and there are two families.”
I cry and I can hear Chelsea as she sobs. The judge clears his throat and says, “I have been dreading this date and this case for that matter, for a long time. The only thing I am thankful for is that these cases are few and far between. The hospital is working on a monetary settlement for each family as we speak. We know it’s not about the money and it won’t resolve anything, but they need to be held accountable so this won’t ever happen again.”
The judge dru
ms his fingers on his overly large desk or bench as the courts call it and says, “As for custody, this isn’t an easy decision.” He looks over to where Drake, Madison, and Chelsea are sitting. I can see that the Sinclairs love Madison and has provided a stable and loving home for her. That’s what children need. Madison is a very caring and loving child. I watched her cry as the Grethers talked about the loss of Jamie.”
He looks over at us and says, “There are no words to say to someone when they lose a child. But Mr. Grether, for you to stand here and say that you would give your life for your daughters, shows me the love that you had for Jamie. I wish this were easier, but it’s not.”
The judge looks straight ahead and says, “The court’s ruling is in favor of the Grethers.”
I hear Chelsea cry and scream, “No, you can’t take her from me. Madison is our daughter, you can’t do this to us. She doesn’t know them.” I place my hands over my ears to mute her cries. Her agony is too much for me. I close my eyes and cry with her. Why am I crying? We just got custody of Madison. I should be dancing around and I’m not. I know her pain, I can feel it in her words. Someone was going to get hurt. It was inevitable. Robert wraps his arms around me and holds me tightly. I cup my hands over my ears harder and her cries still hit me right in my heart. Please stop, please don’t cry.
The judge pauses briefly and explains that it won’t be done quickly. It’ll be done gradually so Madison and both families can adjust to the transition. Family counseling is mandatory for everyone in both families. Chelsea continues to cry. She repeats over and over, "We love her, she’s our daughter, please don’t take her."
I still cover my ears and cry with her. He gets to the part about Jamie. What about Jamie? She’s gone, there’s nothing to discuss. He explains that the Sinclairs have all rights to Jamie’s body. If they want to move her gravesite to another cemetery, they can. “No, you can’t move her. She’s only three, you can’t move her.” I didn’t expect this. I wanted Madison, but I didn’t mean to give up Jamie to have her. “She’s our daughter,” I cry. Not once did I think Jamie would ever be involved. To think that they can move Jamie and I won’t know where she is, that I won’t be able to see her, it’s too much. I’m stupid to think this would all work out.
The dark cloud consumes me. I don’t fight it, I welcome it. I want to be numb. I fall limp in my seat, unable to move, unable to speak, unable to hear. I see what looks like arguing, Robert stands and so does Drake. Bruce and the other attorney also stand. The judge bangs his gavel over and over and it doesn’t do any good. Robert moves to the front of the desk we are sitting at and he looks mad. I just want to sleep, I am so tired. I want to go home. I blink and breath, it’s all I’m capable of. My mind shuts down and finally I’m completely numb.
Robert
When that dickhead judge said Jamie belongs to Drake and Chelsea, I wanted to beat him like I want to beat Kennedy. When I stood, the wooden chair I was sitting on fell behind me. I went to the front of the desk ready to beat down the first person I saw. I see Drake and start to go after him. “Yeah, motherfucker, come and get it.”
Someone grabs me, and I continue on my quest to beat that son of a bitch down. Someone else grabs me and holds me back. I fight to get loose, but I can’t move. I hear the judge’s gavel banging repeatedly and I remember where we are. The jailers loosen my hold and I push them away. I straighten my shoulders, move my neck side to side and take my seat back with Leah.
The judge speaks, but I don’t listen. That’s what I pay Bruce for. I reach for Leah’s hand and she doesn’t respond. I try to intertwine out fingers and she’s limp. I look down at her and she is staring straight ahead. She has a steady stream of tears but doesn’t make a sound. “Robert?” Bruce says. “They want to continue this next week when you and Drake calm down.”
“Yeah, fine, whatever.” I’m not calm now and I won’t be then either.
Bruce walks Leah and me out to our car. She doesn’t say bye to Bruce and she doesn’t say anything on the ride home. I’m afraid her depression has come back. I’m afraid of what this will do to her. “Gracie will be hungry when we get home,” I say, trying to get her mind on something other than Jamie and Madison.
“I’m tired, will you feed her?”
I look at her and she is expressionless. “I will, Baby, you just rest.” I call Sue to give her a head's up of what happened. When we get home Sue, Tim, and I help Leah into bed. She doesn’t say anything other than she’s tired. Sue cries and Tim looks fearful. I know she is back into her depressive state. I asked her did she want to see Gracie and she doesn’t. “I just need to sleep.”
Once Leah is in bed, I close the bedroom door so she can rest. I call her doctor to see if he’ll make a house call. For the right amount of money, anyone will do almost anything. He’ll be over tomorrow.
I warm a bottle up for Gracie and feed her as I tell Dad, Mom, Tim, and Sue everything that happened in court. When I tell them about Jamie, Mom and Sue cry. The thought of someone exhuming her body, makes me sick.
“What are you going to do?” Tim asks and everyone looks at me.
“I have to talk to Leah. I can’t let them move Jamie. I can’t lose her again.”
That night everyone stays at the house. It’s like mourning Jamie all over again. Leah doesn’t eat and she doesn’t get out of bed, either. I tend the Gracie’s needs although Mom and Sue offer. I try to get Leah involved in her feeding but she sleeps.
The next morning when I walk downstairs, no one is around. I smell coffee and the television is on Bay News 9. Two good things: local news and hot coffee. I walk to the coffee pot and fill an extra-large mug to the brim with black coffee. I look outside and the grandparents are on the deck with Gracie. I smile when I see how many people love her. There is breaking news about a six-year-girl who was abducted from her bedroom during the early morning hours. There are some sick bastards in the world. I look at the television and the headlines flashes, Amber Alert for Madison Sinclair.
Books by Brenda Kennedy
Please follow Robert and Leah’s story in One Last Fight, Round Three: of The Fighting to Survive Trilogy.
Other books written by this author include:
The Starting Over Trilogy
Book One: A New Beginning
Book Two: Saving Angel
Book Three: Destined to Love
The Freedom Trilogy
Book One: Shattered Dreams
Book Two: Broken Lives
Book Three: Mending Hearts
Against the Odds is Round Two of The Fighting to Survive Trilogy.
Round One: A Life Worth Fighting
Round Two: Against the Odds…coming in 2015
Round Three: One Last Fight…coming in 2015
I support Indie Authors. If you read this book, please take the time to go to the purchasing site and give it a review. Independent authors count on your reviews to get the word out about our books. Thank you for taking the time to read my books and taking the extra time to review them. I appreciate it very much.
Disclaimer: People and places in this book have been used fictitiously and without malice.
Acknowledgments
My husband, Rex: Thank you for supporting me and for coming with me on this ride. Thank you for understanding that just because I am in my pajamas, I am indeed working. You are my partner for life and I love you.
My Children: Carey, John, Derek, Nikki, Chastidy, Rex, Brittany, Amanda, and Katie: Thank you for reminding me what is important every single day. I love you.
My Grandchildren: Desmond, Samantha, Autumn, Evan, Derek, Dayquan, Darius, Draden, Alyssa, Hailey, Lucca, Tanner, Giovanni, Cain, Lelila, Kylie, DeVonte’, Adrienne, Amaya, Dominic, Damien, Caden, and Gemma: Thank you for reminding me that I am somebody; I am your grandma and nothing else matters. I love you all.
My sisters and brothers: George, Martha, Rosa, Carla, and Frank: Thank you for your support. I love you.
My other brother, David: Without yo
u, I wouldn’t have been able to publish the first book. Thank you for making my ideas better and for all you do. Editing, proofreading, polishing, formatting, ideas, articles, and research websites. See, I do pay attention. Thank you. Thank you for pushing me until I get it right. Maybe someday, I’ll learn the right place to put the commas. I love you and I can never thank you enough. David writes collections of anecdotes such as The Funniest People in Comedy, and he retells classics in such books as William Shakespeare’s Macbeth: A Retelling in Prose. His books can also be found for sale on all leading online sale platforms.
Thank you to my daughters: Carey, Brittany, Amanda: Thank you for all your help at book signings, and with the book swag. I couldn’t have done them without you.
A very special thank you to Amy Linda Valdez for sharing her memories with me about her son, Matthew Caden. Caden, you have a very special Mom and I am glad to know her. R.I.P. and fly with the angels.
Christina Badder, Owner and Operator of CBB Productions: My P.A., and my friend. Thank you for taking care of all of my promotional needs. The blog tours, author spotlights, book cover reveals, give-a-ways, Rafflecopters, Thunderclap campaigns, ARC’s, and everything that I don’t know that you do or things I forgot to mention. I hope you know how much I appreciate your hard work and dedication. Looking forward to actually maybe doing a book signing with you. Girl, I love your work and your dedication. One more thing I need to thank you for is this book cover, and for the other covers in this trilogy. You are so amazing and I am so glad I found you. I plan on keeping you, forever.
Thank you to my Beta readers: There are too many to list and I don’t want to forget anyone. I appreciate you all, more than you know. I appreciate your honest opinions and reviews. I love the bond that we have developed and I appreciate that I can trust you. Thank you for encouraging me to write and for giving me ideas. You never disappoint. I love you guys!
Against the Odds Page 17
