by Iris Parker
I think the only way I managed to stay sane in the waiting room was catching up with Shauna. It still wasn’t enough to stop me from thinking about Emilia, but at least I was able to breathe while doing it.
Apparently she, Ella and Theo are all doing great. Word got around about the part they played in getting Argus behind bars, and the community’s so happy to see the geriatric drug lord in prison that they’re practically local heroes. The police check in from time to time, making sure nobody is after revenge, but I don’t think the old geezer had any friends left.
The news just got better from there. She was actually listening when I suggested she look into rugby scholarships, and she rattled off a whole list of colleges that she planned to apply to next year. I promised to write her a letter of endorsement to each place, and her eyes lit up.
She promised not to tip off Emilia that I was here, and asked if I was going to “win her back.”
I was certainly going to try.
Waiting for Emilia in the rec center had been torture, my mind constantly cycling between knowing it was a mistake to leave and worrying that maybe it was a mistake to come back.
When she finally made an appearance, I had barely been able to breathe. I could feel my body screaming with every move I made as a riot of conflicting emotions seized me. All I could do was hope that she would accept my apology and wait to see her reaction.
Sitting in the car next to her today, I once again had a similar feeling. Then, I had been caught between terror and hope. Now, it was between excitement and anxiety, euphoria and awkwardness. I’d wanted to give her a good surprise for a change, but I didn’t know how she was going to react.
Mentioning the weekend getaway had put a brilliant light in Emilia’s eyes, but I wanted that to only be the start. I wanted to give her everything she always wanted and then more on top of that. I wanted this to be the start of the rest of our lives together, a cherished memory to hold onto dearly.
The mid-November air was getting crisper as we drove further up the mountain, and Emilia wrapped a shawl around her shoulders. I looked at her and smiled, noting the curve of her breast stretching the thin fabric of her blouse.
She had put on a little weight recently, finally getting to a healthier range. She no longer looked dangerously skinny, my fears of her reverting back into unhealthy habits now fading. It seemed that she had finally won that particular struggle.
For both of us, it was a time to heal. Being able to freely discuss the ghosts of our past had been wildly liberating, cathartic in a way I never imagined possible. I felt like a new man, one who had a mission as the new co-director of athletics at the Goodman Youth Center. I could finally look at myself in a mirror without wanting to cringe, and Emilia’s insomnia was a thing of the past.
“Tell me more about the lake, please,” Em said, stretching her legs out in front of her like a sleepy kitten.
“I’ve already told you at least ten times,” I laughed as she stuck her tongue out at me and made a silly face.
“Tell me an eleventh time, then,” she said with a playful sigh.
“It’s big and beautiful, surrounded by tall trees. It’s right outside the door, and the dock is no more than a couple hundred yards away. There are a couple of rowboats, and the water is so clear you can see the bottom on a good day. During the summer, it’s great for swimming.”
“Too bad it’s not still summertime,” she complained, wrapping herself more tightly in the dark green shawl my mother had knitted for her.
I nodded, my lips curling into a sly smile that I hoped she didn’t notice. There was no doubt that the lake would be wonderful in summer, but I’d neglected to tell her about the nearby pond. Just barely big enough for two people, the water was perpetually warm thanks to a hot spring. It had seemed like a wonderful place to cuddle, doubly so in the cold weather.
Of course, that wasn’t the biggest surprise I had planned.
My heart was beating faster as we got closer and closer to the cabin. I’d visited it a dozen times in the last month, making sure everything was just right. The lake was gorgeous, but the cabin was even better. Nestled in the heart of the forest and on the edge of a clearing, it overlooked the majestic lake Emilia was so excited about. There was enough space for a wrap-around porch, and the area was remote enough that the stars were absolutely breathtaking. I’d already had the large kitchen renovated, and when the weather was right for it, I planned to install a massive skylight in the main bedroom.
We drove through the nearest town, stopping at the small grocery store to get enough food to last us the weekend. As we headed back to the car, the first few snowflakes began falling upon us.
“We should hurry up,” I suggested, piling the groceries in the trunk as Emilia climbed back inside.
By the time we closed the last few miles to the cabin, a thin layer of crisp white snow covered the ground and trees all around us.
“Come here,” I called back to Emilia, who had insisted on being let out of the car the moment the lake came into view. After parking, I was eager to see her reaction to the cabin itself.
“This lake is so beautif—” she began as she turned towards me. She stopped dead in her tracks, mouth agape at the cabin looming before her. My heart pounded wildly in my chest. I scanned her face, taking in her reaction.
“When you said ‘cabin,’ I pictured something smaller. This is huge! And gorgeous!” she said excitedly while I approached her and wrapped my arm around her shoulders.
“I’m glad you like it,” I said, guiding her gently up the small flight of stairs to the porch. “Remember that night when you told me you’d have loved to own a cabin in the middle of nowhere? A place to retreat over the weekends?”
“I do,” she said, smiling softly at me even as she pushed me out of the way to look at the cabin more. She put her hand on the doorknob, a beautiful glow lighting up her eyes.
“Can I?”
“Of course you can,” I said, pulling the key from my wallet and handing it to her. “It’s your cabin.”
She grabbed the key from my hand, joyfully unlocking the door and taking a step into the foyer before freezing in place. She stood in silence for a moment before turning around to face me, her eyes wide.
“What did you say?” she asked.
“‘Of course you can,’” I answered, trying to keep a straight face.
“And after that?”
“That it was your cabin,” I said.
“And what exactly did you mean by that?”
“That you own it. I bought it for you,” I said, finally losing control and letting the huge smile out across my face.
“Oh my god, Simon! You didn’t— I mean, I can’t have it. No one has ever given me such a huge thing. Even with all your money, a place like this can’t possibly be cheap.”
“Of course you can have it. It’s exactly what you wanted. A peaceful place to hide over the weekends, hiking trails that we can run on, a beautiful lake, trees everywhere. It wasn’t cheap, because I didn’t want it to be cheap. I want this to be a place that you treasure, that we treasure, for the rest of our lives,” I said, tipping my hand just a little. My heart felt like it was about to pop out of my chest. I knew I’d convinced her to accept the gift, and now I just needed her to accept the rest of my offer.
The real surprise.
“Let’s get inside,” I suggested, pressing a hand into her back as we walked further into the cabin. The look of shock and awe on her face was so delicious, it made me want to squeeze her in my arms and simply never let go.
“Oh wow.” The large living space had a typical log cabin look, with wood paneled walls and floor-to-ceiling windows that looked out over the lake. In the middle of the room was a round, free standing fireplace that I’d already packed full of logs during my last trip here.
To the opposite side of the room was a flight of stairs, leading up to a loft space that connected to the bedrooms. The stairs also continued and split to a tiny third le
vel, the only deviation from the log cabin aesthetic. The “floor” had a single room, a solarium with glass walls and a breathtaking view of the surrounding area.
“I bought it off a family who was leaving for California. They were ecstatic about the move, except for having to leave the cabin. I can see why. They made me swear we’d take good care of it,” I explained as Emilia continued to explore her new retreat.
“Did you?”
“I told them I was certain you’d take good care of it…and that I was hoping you’d accept me by your side in here, too,” I said, dropping to my knee with a huge knot constricting my throat.
I didn’t fare any better than the legions of anxiety-ridden men who came before me as I fumbled through the pocket of my jacket, retrieving the velvet box I’d been playing with all afternoon.
Emilia’s hands shot to her face, then to her heart as her eyes began to fill with tears.
“Emilia, I love you more than I ever loved anyone my entire life. I want to grow old with you, both here and at home in the city. I want to watch our kids playing on the swing in the backyard. Will you marry me?”
“Oh Simon, of course I will,” she said, throwing herself in my arms. She looked beautiful, her cheeks flushed with the most delicious shade of pink, her eyes scintillating with happiness. I pulled the engagement ring from the box, sliding it onto her finger as I crashed my lips onto hers before pulling her in close. Her chest crushed tightly against mine, I could feel her racing heart beating almost as erratically as my own.
Cupping her face in my hands, I looked deep into her beautiful green eyes and watched a slow, fat tear run down her cheek.
This time, it wasn’t a tear of pain.
It never would be again.
Just one page left, but life goes on.
Part of me wanted to use this book as kindling for our new fireplace, but Emilia talked me out of burning it.
We spent so long being haunted by the ghosts of our past, but the present belongs to the living.
And now, the future belongs to us.
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Contents
Front
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
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