“Rebecca’s son,” Courtney clarified. She wanted more than anything to add, my boyfriend, but now wasn’t the time to drop that news. How had she kept so much from Grandma? They used to be so close.
“Can I talk to you and your sisters alone?”
Brett squeezed her hand, giving her an encouraging smile. “I’ll be in the kitchen,” he said, quietly enough that Grandma couldn’t hear.
“All right.” She watched him back away, his eyes not leaving hers until he reached the doors and let himself out. She wanted to pull him back inside and tell him to stay. But then her sisters were by her side, Peyton sitting on the edge of the pool table, and Savannah leaning against it, her eyes wide as she waited to see what Courtney would do next.
As much as she would like for Brett to be there with her, she didn’t need him with her. Because she had her sisters. Whatever Grandma was about to tell them was clearly a family matter. Brett would be there for her afterward. Her sisters would be here with her now.
“It’s just the three of us,” Courtney said. “Me, Peyton and Savannah. What happened?”
“There’s no easy way to tell you, so I’m just going to say it,” Grandma said. “Aunt Sophie passed away in her sleep last night.”
Courtney gasped, her hand flying to her mouth. Aunt Sophie was doing okay when they’d visited in January. Yes, she was low on energy, and was having trouble getting around, but she hadn’t seemed like she was close to...dying.
She’d known this day would come, but she hadn’t expected it to happen this fast. Aunt Sophie couldn’t be gone. What could Courtney possibly say? She couldn’t make this better. She couldn’t bring Aunt Sophie back. She couldn’t turn back time so she could be with Grandma during these last few days, instead of vacationing in Aspen. She wished she could. But she couldn’t.
“I’m so sorry, Grandma.” Savannah spoke first, her words filled with so much raw honesty Courtney’s heart broke even more.
“If we’d known she was getting worse, we would have been there with you,” Courtney finally said.
“I know you would have,” Grandma said. “But you know that Aunt Sophie had her bad days and her good days. I didn’t want to worry you this time, especially since a few days ago, she had a burst of energy and we were able to have dinner together at a vineyard...” Her voice faded, as if recalling the memory hurt her. “I didn’t think the past few days were more than another setback. I wouldn’t let myself believe anything else. Then this morning, I thought she was sleeping in for longer than normal, and I didn’t want to wake her, because she needed every second of rest she could get. It was your mother who eventually realized...”
An image popped into Courtney’s mind of what it must have been like for her mom to walk into Aunt Sophie’s room and realize that she wasn’t going to wake up. A wave of dizziness hit her, and she gripped the pool table to keep steady.
“We’ll fly out today,” Peyton said. “It’ll be a few hours before we’re there. Is Mom with you?”
“Yes.” Grandma’s voice was so hollow that goose bumps rose up along Courtney’s arms. “She just came out of the kitchen, with sandwiches.”
“Good,” Peyton said. “You need to remember to eat. Can we talk to her?”
They transferred the phone, and all Courtney could think about was how she couldn’t believe that Aunt Sophie was gone. How could Grandma be so healthy, and have had a twin who got so sick? It wasn’t fair.
Just like when Courtney and Britney had been kidnapped all those years ago, Britney had been the one who died. None of it was fair. It just was.
They talked with their mom for a few minutes, and she told them about the funeral plans. It was going to be small—the immediate family, plus some of Grandma’s and Aunt Sophie’s friends.
“One last thing,” Mom said. “The graveyard where Sophie will be buried...our family has been using it for generations.”
“That makes sense,” Courtney said.
“It’s where Britney’s buried.”
“Oh.” She picked at a piece of felt on the pool table. Why hadn’t she ever asked where Britney had been buried? Since finding out about her, the pictures in the baby book had been the way Courtney had chosen to mourn her lost sister.
But maybe it was time she faced this.
“I just thought you should know that she’s there,” Mom said.
“Okay.” Courtney’s head spun so much that she wasn’t sure what else to say.
“I’m going to let you go now so you can get your stuff together and tell your friends goodbye,” Mom continued. “And while I wish the circumstances were better, I’m looking forward to seeing you.”
They clicked the End Call button, and Courtney stared at the phone, unable to believe this was all happening.
“I knew Aunt Sophie was sick, and that she didn’t have long,” Savannah said, her lower lip trembling. “But I still feel like we’re going to walk into Grandma’s house, and Aunt Sophie will be there, alive.”
“Yeah,” Courtney said. “But when we get there today...she won’t be.”
She was stating the obvious, but she didn’t know what else to say. What had Mom and Grandma done when they’d realized Aunt Sophie wasn’t just sleeping? Called 911, even though they knew she was past saving? Sat with the body, as if hoping they’d been wrong and she might still wake up?
Courtney couldn’t let herself dwell on these details...it wouldn’t help. So she stood up straighter and put on a brave face for her sisters. “Come on,” she said, leading the way back to the kitchen. “Let’s tell everyone that we’re leaving.”
* * *
When they’d filled their friends in, everyone reacted differently. Madison had said to let them know if they needed anything, and she’d sounded like she meant it. Oliver had offered to charter a plane to fly everyone else back to Vegas, and to buy Emily Nicole a ticket back to LA. Damien had offered to go to the funeral with Savannah, and Brett had offered to go with Courtney, but since Mom had been clear that they were keeping it small, they told them to go back to Vegas with Oliver and that they’d see them when they got home.
Courtney was in a haze the entire time they traveled to California. When they finally arrived, it was like she’d entered some strange parallel universe. Grandma had less energy than ever, and she spent most of that day and the next watching TV, staring blankly at the screen. Mom, surprisingly, buzzed around the house, managing arrangements for the funeral.
Now they were under the tent in the graveyard, watching the coffin lower into the spot beside Aunt Sophie’s husband. It was the last moment Aunt Sophie’s body would be above ground. Behind the lenses of her sunglasses, Courtney’s eyes filled with tears.
Grandma sobbed, and Courtney squeezed her hand to let her know she was there. She wished she’d had more time to get to know her great-aunt. That conversation in January was the only one-on-one conversation they’d ever had, when Aunt Sophie had urged Courtney to forgive Grandma and Mom. Hopefully she trusted that Courtney would eventually heed her advice. But if there was any reminder that life didn’t last forever, this was it.
At the end of the ceremony, everyone stepped forward individually to scoop up a small amount of dirt with a gardening shovel and toss it on top of the coffin. When it was Courtney’s turn, she picked up the shovel, scooped up dirt and tossed it inside. It landed on the coffin with an echoing plunk.
She grabbed her second scoop, and her thoughts wandered to Britney. To how all those years ago, Grandma, Mom and Aunt Sophie had gone through similar steps while burying her twin. As the third shovelful of dirt landed on Aunt Sophie’s coffin, it was like she was putting Britney to rest, too.
The ceremony ended, and the few people who were there said their goodbyes and condolences. Eventually only Courtney, Peyton, Savannah, Mom and Grandma remained.
Mom
stepped up beside Courtney, both of them staring at Aunt Sophie’s burial site. “Would you like to see Britney’s grave?” she asked.
Courtney stared ahead, running her fingers over her key necklace—the one Grandma had given her for her birthday, the one that unlocked the trunk that held her and Britney’s baby book. She didn’t feel ready. How would she ever be ready for this? But this was something she had to do. So she nodded to her mom to lead the way. Her sisters followed, and Grandma stayed behind to say her final goodbyes to Aunt Sophie.
Britney’s grave was a few over from Aunt Sophie’s, the marker the same gray concrete as most of the others in the cemetery. Yellow mustard flowers were growing nearby, so Courtney picked one and placed it on top of her sister’s gravestone. She read the dates—the ones showing that Britney had lived for only six months—and knelt next to it. The rain from that morning soaked through her tights, and she shivered, goose bumps rising on her arms. Her fingers traced the dates etched on the stone, and then traveled to the text underneath, where it said Beloved sister and daughter.
It was so unfair. Unfair that Britney had lived only six months, and unfair that Courtney hadn’t known about her existence all this time. How many times had Mom snuck away to come here to visit Britney? So many years had passed when Courtney, Peyton and Savannah could have been visiting Britney here, too.
Courtney sniffed and wiped away a tear that had fallen past her sunglasses. She placed her palm on the damp ground in front of the headstone. Only a few feet away, her sister’s body was buried, frozen forever at six months old. Her sister, who would never have the chance to grow up—whom Courtney would never have a chance to know.
She would never forget how Mom and Grandma had kept Britney’s existence from her and her sisters. But they were her family, and the time she’d spent not speaking to them could never be regained.
She stood up, wiped the grass from her knees and rejoined Mom, who’d been standing behind her and her sisters. Together, they observed Britney’s grave in silence.
“Thank you for bringing us here,” Courtney finally said.
“After all these years, you deserved to come,” Mom said. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you the truth sooner. It’s one of the many things I would change about the past, if that were possible.”
“We can’t change the past.”
“No,” she agreed. “But I am sorry. For everything.”
“I know,” Courtney said. “And I don’t want to keep blocking you and Grandma out. I want to move forward.”
“You mean...you forgive me?”
“Yes.” Courtney’s voice was stronger than it had been all day. “I forgive you. But there can’t be any more lies. Adrian swore there weren’t, and I want to hear it from you, too.”
“No more lies,” Mom repeated. “You know everything. I promise.” She stepped forward, wrapping her arms around Courtney. Courtney froze—her mom rarely hugged anyone, or showed any affection. She usually only hugged Savannah, and that was only on good days.
But Courtney hugged her back, and as they rejoined Grandma, a hopeful feeling swelled in her chest.
Perhaps this could be a fresh start for them all.
chapter 27:
They flew back to Vegas on Sunday night, since school would be starting back up tomorrow. It had been a long day, and while Peyton normally loved staying up late, she couldn’t wait to get into bed and pass out. But, of course, Adrian and Rebecca were waiting for them when they got home. Rebecca had even brought cookies from the Diamond Café.
Adrian settled onto the couch, picked up a cookie and popped a piece of it into his mouth. He rarely ate anything unhealthy—Peyton couldn’t recall ever seeing him eat dessert—so he must really be in need of comfort food.
He finished chewing and said, “I know this has been a hard weekend for you. I spoke with your mom and offered to come out to California for the funeral, but she wanted to keep it to her side of the family. I had to respect her request.”
“You spoke to Mom?” Peyton hadn’t thought that her parents had spoken at all since the divorce. She’d assumed that Grandma had always been the one to talk to Adrian.
“Yes, I spoke with your mom,” he said. “I wanted to express my condolences. I didn’t know Sophie well, but she was at our wedding. She was a kind woman.”
Peyton nodded, unsure what else to say. Since finding out that Aunt Sophie had passed away, everything felt like a blur. Flying to California, seeing Grandma so distraught, the funeral, visiting Britney’s gravestone and Courtney forgiving Mom and Grandma. It had been a long few days. She rubbed her eyes and yawned, wanting to collapse into bed.
“The three of you look exhausted,” Rebecca said.
“Yeah.” Courtney studied her cookie, which she’d only taken a small bite from.
“We just wanted you to know that we’re here for you if you need to talk,” Adrian said. “And we completely understand if you need a day off from school tomorrow.”
“Hold up.” Peyton was about to take a bite out of her cookie, but she paused in midair. “Are you giving us the okay to skip school?”
“Yes,” Adrian said. “Although Rebecca and I would like you to join us for brunch.”
“Okay.” Peyton didn’t need more than a second to think about it. Apparently her sisters didn’t, either, because Savannah agreed, and Courtney did, too. Courtney had never skipped a day of school in her life, so she must have been really wiped out.
“What time should I make brunch reservations for tomorrow?” Adrian asked. “Eleven?”
“Eleven?” Courtney’s eyes bulged. “Isn’t that late for breakfast?”
“It’s brunch, and eleven is perfect.” Peyton glared at her sister to be quiet.
“I would rather do eleven, also,” Savannah said. “I need to catch up on sleep.”
“Eleven it is,” Adrian said, getting up from the couch. “See you girls then. Sleep well.”
“And remember, if you need anything, we’re right next door,” Rebecca added.
Once they were gone, Peyton collapsed onto the couch. Courtney and Savannah both took out their phones, their gazes glued to the screens.
“Damien’s been texting me like crazy since we got back,” Savannah said, typing furiously. “I’m going to stop by his condo before going to sleep.”
“And I want to stop by Brett’s, too.” Courtney looked at Peyton, guilt splashed on her face. “I don’t want to abandon you, but you do look like you could pass out and sleep for twelve hours straight.”
“I could.” Peyton ignored the jab at how tired she looked, since she knew she looked like shit. The circles under her eyes had gotten so dark that no amount of concealer would make a difference. “And I get that you want to see Brett. But it’s been days, Courtney. Aren’t you gonna tell us how it was?”
“How what was?” Courtney blushed and picked at her cuticles.
“Your first time with Brett,” Peyton said nonchalantly. “Which I assume went well, since when I was packing I couldn’t help noticing the multiple condoms missing from the box I’d brought. All in extra large, I might add. Wasn’t expecting that one.”
“Omigosh.” Savannah gasped, her mouth dropping open. “Please don’t tell me you’ve thought about the size of Brett’s...” She pressed her lips together, as if she couldn’t bring herself to say it.
“Penis?” Peyton supplied. “Nope, not something I sit around thinking about. But I had to take stock of what was missing to resupply—after all, it’s important to be prepared, which is apparently a lesson Courtney learned this weekend—and it was hard to miss. So tell me...” She crossed her legs and turned to Courtney. “How was it? You can’t lose your virginity and not tell us. That’s against the code of sisterhood.”
“It was the night we played Never Have I Ever in the hot tub,
wasn’t it?” Savannah asked. “I knew Brett walked you back to your room, and that he stayed the night, but I thought you were just talking. Because if you’d lost your virginity, you would have told us. Right?”
“I swear I was going to tell you both,” Courtney said, before they had a chance to get in another word. “But we never got any time alone in Aspen, then we went back to California for the funeral...and it was a personal moment, you know?”
“I guess,” Savannah mumbled. “I just thought you would have told us before now.”
“I liked having those few days when it was only me and Brett who knew,” she said. “And even though I’m telling you now, please don’t ask me to spill every detail. Because those are for me and him only. Okay?”
“But you’re happy with your decision?” Peyton asked. “You don’t regret it?”
“I don’t regret a single moment.” Courtney smiled. “Well, I regret taking my bathing suit off for that stupid game in the hot tub. But everything else that happened that night?” She gazed out the window, her expression dreamy. “I wouldn’t change a thing.”
“You’re in love with him, aren’t you?” Savannah clasped her hands together, her eyes shining.
“Yes,” Courtney said. “I am.”
“But no one knows the two of you are together except for me and Savannah...and everyone else who was with us in Aspen,” Peyton said.
“Madison, Oliver, Brianna, Damien, Evie, Emily Nicole...” Courtney counted off everyone who stayed in the house—minus Perry and Noel, which was probably for Savannah’s benefit. “They all know?”
“Of course they know,” Peyton said. “Every time you and Brett look at each other, it’s obvious that there’s something up between you two.”
“I thought we were being subtle,” Courtney said, although she didn’t sound like she believed it.
“You look at him with your whole heart in your eyes,” Savannah said. “You were not being subtle.”
“And you have to know that you can’t keep it from Adrian and Rebecca forever,” Peyton added. “Remember what happened with me and Jackson? Adrian finds out everything.”
Diamonds are Forever Page 27
