by Ann Lister
“So, what happens in the meantime?” Lana asked. “Are you prepared to remain celibate, in the hope she comes to her senses?”
“I don’t know what I’m going to do.”
“Let me see your hands,” she said, flipping his hands over to expose his palms.
“What are you looking for?” Nick asked.
“Calluses, and I don’t see any yet, so I think I’ve caught you in time, before you sink into the abyss of too much self-gratification,” she winked. “I’d be happy to take the edge off for you.”
“I’m sure,” he said, sipping more beer. “Look, I appreciate your interest and concern for my sexual well-being, but I’m fine. I’ve survived worse.” He grabbed her by the elbow and turned her. “Come on, let’s go back to the table.”
As Nick and Lana approached Colby’s table, John spotted them and extended his hand to Nick.
“Hey, Nick,” John said, shaking Nick’s hand. “Good to see you.”
“You, too,” Nick said, then turned his attention to Colby. “Always a pleasure seeing you,” he smiled.
“You two know each other?” John asked.
Nick turned to John and grinned mischievously. “You could say that,” he said, then bent and pressed his face beside Colby’s ear. “I’ll let you explain to him how we know each other,” he whispered, then stood upright. “Enjoy your evening,” he said to John and tugged on Lana’s hand, leading them back to their table.
“How do you know Nick?” John asked Colby.
Colby’s face was still flushed with heat from Nick’s closeness. Her fingers went to the spot his lips had brushed against her skin and rubbed at it, as if trying to soothe an ache. “I slipped off a trail last December and Nick was the one that rescued me.”
“Oh, right,” John said. “I forgot he's part of the Search and Rescue team.”
Colby nodded at John and hoped that was enough to satisfy his curiosity. Unconsciously, she turned her head toward Nick’s table and spotted Lana sitting on his lap. Emotion began to build in her eyes.
“Were you hurt?” John asked Colby. The tone in his voice told her his question had a much deeper meaning.
“Yes, but I’m fine now,” she said. A moment later, she saw Nick and Lana leaving by the back door and moving across the outside deck together. The sight made her start to tremble and her stomach churned. “John, I’m not feeling very well. If you don’t mind, I think I’ll go back to my room and lay down.”
“Okay, Colby,” he said. “It was nice to meet you. Maybe we can see each other again, when you’re feeling better?”
“Sure, that would be fine,” Colby said. She slipped on her coat and turned to her friends, apologized for leaving early, and walked toward the back door. As soon as her face hit the cool mountain air, her tears began to flow. She descended the deck stairs and walked across the path toward her room. A dark figure sitting on top of a picnic table, caught her eye. She wiped at her cheeks and started past, then heard her name called.
“Colby?”
She spun around and realized it was Nick sitting by himself. “What are you doing out here? I thought by now you’d be naked in your girlfriend's bed,” she said with disgust.
Nick shook his head. “As I've said before, Lana is not my girlfriend. Besides, I came out alone and I’ll be going home alone. How about you? Why are you leaving your date so early?”
“John wasn’t my date,” she said with firmness, and began to step away.
“Colby,” he said, and waited for her to turn around again. “Why are we doing this to each other?”
“What are we doing?”
“The last time I saw you, I made you cry, so I made a conscious decision to keep my distance but, two weeks later, I’m still making you cry. I don’t know what else I can do to make it better. Your emotion tells me you still have feelings for me. Why else would you cry every time you see me?”
“Nick…please.”
“Is this the way you really want it to be between us?” he asked.
Colby glanced at her feet, then down the pathway toward her room in the distance. “I don’t know.”
A cold silence fell between them and Nick began to fidget on the table.
“John’s a nice guy,” Nick finally said. “You could do a lot worse with some of the guys at this resort; which I’m guessing is how you already feel - getting mixed up with me.”
Colby shook her head. “That’s not how I feel about you, Nick.”
Nick nodded and stood up from the table. “Well, regardless, John’s safe. He won’t hurt you.”
“I’m not with John.”
Nick stepped closer to Colby, his eyes gazing down at her, hurt and vulnerability pouring from them. His fingers reached to wipe the moisture from her cheek, and to his amazement, she didn’t move away.
“I don’t want things to be like this, Colby. This hurts too much,” he said softly. “Go back inside and enjoy yourself. I’m going home, so I won’t be around to upset you further. I can’t guarantee we won’t bump into each other in the months to come, but I’ll do my best to respect your space.”
Nick removed his hand from her face and stepped backward.
“Nick, you don’t have to leave the club,” she said, choking on a sob.
“I have no reason to stay,” he said, and forced a smile. “Really, go back inside and have some fun.”
Colby watched him walk away until he disappeared from her view. Only then, did she turn and make her way back to her own room. Each time she saw Nick, it made her feel worse, more isolated, and totally alone. She touched her face where his hand had been and began to cry again. It hurt to see him, but she knew it would be more painful if she returned to Los Angeles.
She went to work on Monday and immersed herself. She slowly began making new friends and even accepted a real date with John. They had dinner at the lodge first, then he took her for a walk outside. He was polite and forthcoming about himself, but Colby felt reluctant to reveal herself to him.
When he stopped along an outside path to kiss her, Colby stiffened in his arms. His lips were soft and welcoming, but Colby felt no sparks of desire, nothing that even came close to what she felt when Nick kissed her. John pulled Colby tighter against him and attempted a second kiss.
“Colby, I’m sensing you don’t want this,” he said. His hands settled at the small of her back.
Colby dropped her gaze to his chest. “I’m sorry, John. You’re really nice but…”
“There’s someone else.”
“I don’t know. Possibly,” she said with reluctance.
“Would that someone be Nick Gaffney?”
Colby pulled away from John. “What makes you say that?”
“I saw the way he looked at you the other night in the club and it was impossible to miss the look of disapproval he gave me because I was with you.”
“I’m really sorry,” Colby said, and shook her head.
“Don’t be,” John said. He turned and directed her back toward the lodge. “Can I ask what happened between you two?”
“I’m not sure it would make any sense.”
“Try me. Maybe I can help give you the male perspective.”
Colby looked at him, wanting to trust John, but still feeling the need to remain guarded. What happened between her and Nick was deeply personal and she wasn’t sure she wanted to share any of it.
“Nick and I sort of had a ‘thing’,” she said.
“Judging by the looks on both your faces the other night, it seems like it was much more than a ‘thing’.”
“Honestly, at the time it happened I had the feeling it was something more, but since returning to the resort, I’ve determined it was nothing more than a ‘thing’.”
“What makes you say that?” John asked.
“I’ve recently learned some unpleasant things about Nick. I think I made a mistake and listened to my heart instead of my head,” Colby said.
“The heart wants what the heart wants, Col
by. Don’t try and justify it, and remember, your first instinct about people is usually the right instinct. The mistake you’re making now is believing all the bullshit hearsay circulating around about Nick, most likely, from jealous women.”
Colby exhaled loudly. “I came back to find closure.”
“I’m not getting the feeling you got it,” John said.
“I did, but it wasn’t the ending I had hoped for.”
John stopped by the door to Colby’s building. “Then, change the ending.”
“I’m not sure I want to,” she said. “I think I’ll just do my six months here and return to Los Angeles. In the meantime, I’ll do my best to stay out of his way.”
John smiled warmly and kissed her on the cheek.
“Thank you for dinner,” Colby said.
“You’re welcome. I’d ask you out again, but I think I already know what your answer would be.”
Colby smiled weakly and slipped inside the building. John was exactly the type of guy she would typically be attracted to, and yet, while with him, all she could do was think of Nick.
Colby walked down the hall and unlocked the door to her room. She sat on the end of her bed and reached into her purse, retrieving her cell phone. She opened the lid on the phone and scanned through the photographs stored inside the phone memory. There were two photographs saved from her four days with Nick. One photo was of them together, cheek to cheek, while Colby held out the phone, at arms length in front of their faces, to take the shot. The second shot was of Nick laying on her bed shirtless. She had gazed at these photographs too many times to count, and each time it gave her a sense of warmth.
She found Nick’s cell phone number and touched it on the screen. She ached to hear the sound of his voice, hearing him tell her everything would be okay. “Not tonight,” she said to herself and put the phone back into her purse.
Chapter Eight
The following week, Colby’s time was consumed with two large parties of foreigners. She was doing her best to divide her time between a party of eight from France and a party of ten from Russia, arranging activities and translating for them when needed.
She came back to her office at lunch to take a break. Her party from the wine country of France were getting private ski lessons, while her Russian family were taking a self-guided tour around the mountain and resort, followed by a little shopping in town. With any luck, she hoped to have a few hours of peace.
“Is Colby Hansen working today?” a man yelled, as he stepped into the main office of Colby’s department.
Colby heard her name and stood in the doorway of her office. “I’m Colby Hansen,” she said. She didn’t recognize the man and remained standing in place. “How can I help you?”
The man was dressed in the standard Search and Rescue uniform of black ski pants and bright red coat with the white cross on the chest and backside. He turned toward the sound of Colby’s voice.
“I understand you speak fluent Russian,” the man said.
“Yes. Why?”
“There’s been an accident on Summit Road. A van full of Russians skidded off the road and we need a translator to help us assess their injuries.”
“Oh my God! They’re my clients!” Colby said in shock. “Let me grab my coat.”
“You’ll need boots, too - if you have a pair with you.”
Colby slipped into her boots and zipped her coat. “Let’s go!”
The man hurried Colby outside to a running snowmobile and asked her to get onto the back. He handed her a helmet and told her to hold onto his waist.
“My name is Peter,” he said, accelerating the engine. “I work with Nick Gaffney. He asked me to come get you. He thought you might be able to help.”
Peter raced to the accident scene. By the time they arrived, several rescue vehicles were already in the process of trying to stabilize the victims. The van lay on its side, just over the edge of the trail, resting up against a tree. Smoke poured from the engine. Colby could see several members of the family strewn around the wreckage, all with varied degrees of serious injury.
“Nick! Colby’s here,” Peter shouted to him.
“Bring her down,” Nick said from beside the van.
Peter helped Colby down the embankment toward Nick, then disappeared to help the others.
“Thanks for coming,” Nick said, only briefly making eye contact with her before his eyes went back to his patient.
“How can I help?” Colby asked.
“Calm her down and ask her where it hurts,” Nick said. He continued wrapping bandages around a grotesque leg injury.
Colby stared at the woman’s bloodied face and realized it was the mother of the family. She swallowed hard and knelt beside the woman’s body in the snow, quickly rambling through several Russian phrases. When Colby finished talking, the woman replied in her native language, emotion and pain distorting her voice.
“She says her ribs and head hurt,” Colby said, looking at Nick. “She’s also asking about the rest of her family.”
Nick heard the quiver in Colby’s voice and raised his eyes to her. He saw the panic in her face and tried to force a reassuring smile. “It’s okay, Colby,” he said quietly. “You can’t let her see your fear or she’ll react to it. I know you can do this.”
Colby nodded and swallowed around the emotion she felt building in her throat.
“Tell her we’re still assessing her family and we’ll let her know as soon as we can.”
Nick worked feverishly, moving the mother onto a backboard and preparing her for transport. Then, he clutched onto Colby’s arm and directed her to the next victim. They repeated the same routine with all ten family members, until everyone of them had been given first-aid and prepared for transport down the mountain.
Colby was awed watching Nick work. She saw a side to him that truly moved her. He was extremely professional, his hands working faster than Colby thought possible, while he tirelessly worked on each victim. He offered reassurance and tenderness to everyone - including Colby.
Hours later, when the last patient was loaded onto the transport vehicle, Colby sat on the back of Peter’s snowmobile, buckling the chin strap of her helmet. She heard the crunching of boots in the snow approaching and moved on the seat to make room for Peter to sit.
“Your help was invaluable,” Nick said. He dropped a helmet over his head and took the seat behind the handle bars, without much thought of how his presence would effect Colby.
“I thought this was Peter’s…”
Nick turned his head toward her. “If you’d prefer he drive you, I can go find him,” he said with sadness.
“That’s not necessary.”
“Good. Hold on,” he said, and started the engine.
Colby wrapped her arms around Nick’s waist. She held on loosely, until Nick took a sharp corner, forcing Colby to tighten her grip on him, for fear of falling off the back of the moving sled.
“Sorry about that,” he yelled to her. “I should have warned you that turn was coming.”
Colby kept her face pressed to his back and closed her eyes. She could feel the friction of her thighs rubbing against the outside of his and the strength of his body. She could smell him, feel his warmth, and every memory of him came crashing back to her. By the time they reached the triage building, her heart was racing and every square inch of her body was alive and pulsing with energy. As soon as the snowmobile stopped, she jumped off the back of the machine; as if it might burst into flames, and quickly removed her helmet.
Nick remained seated and turned to her. He saw the flushed expression on her face and the look of shock registering in her blue eyes. He pulled off his helmet and set it in his lap. “There’s something about you riding against my back that gets me going every time,” he said with an easy smile.
“I should get back to work,” Colby said softly, embarrassed by the honesty in his words. She had felt it too, but she wouldn’t have dared to admit it.
Nick swung his leg
over the seat and stood up. “Thanks again for the help,” he said. “We work well together.”
Colby nodded nervously. “Yes, we do,” she said, and turned to leave.
He watched her step away and sighed. “Colby.”
She slowly turned, almost afraid to make eye contact with him.
“What are you doing Saturday afternoon?” he asked.
“Laundry.”
“Would you like to meet me for lunch?” he asked. He dropped his gaze, fully expecting her to turn him down again, like she had so many other times in recent weeks.
“What time?”
Nick’s head lifted, quickly making eye contact with her; wondering if he had heard her correctly. “How’s noon sound?”
She smiled, and stepped away. “I’ll see you then.”
He called to her again. “You’ll need to dress warm,” he said. “I’m taking you up the mountain to the Summit Restaurant.”
Colby nodded and waved as she made her way toward the lodge.
Several hours later, Colby’s cell phone was ringing. She glanced at the caller I.D. and realized it was Nick. A smile spread across her face as she answered it.
“I thought you’d want to know, your Russian clients have all been released from the hospital, except for the father,” Nick said. “He needed surgery on his leg, so they’ll keep him for a couple of days to monitor him, but they expect him to make a full recovery.”
“Oh, that’s great news!”
“They were lucky,” Nick said.
“They were lucky to have you there to help them.”
“I’m part of a team, Colby. We all helped that family - including you. We wouldn’t have been able to administer the proper care as fast we did without you translating for us. It was a really good group effort.”
“Yes, it was.”
Silence fell between them. Colby could hear the gentle rhythm of Nick’s breathing through the phone. She wanted to be with him. Her body ached for his touch. Since riding with him on the back of the snowmobile, she hadn’t been able to erase the feeling his body had given her. It was a profound sense of fullness, warmth and love.
“What are you doing?” he finally asked, breaking the silence.
