Rebecca couldn’t believe it.
Telling Alice that Mark was out of prison was difficult, and she told her that there had been the start of something with Arthur, but it was over and for the best. Alice had been so disappointed, but her face when Vicky showed up was outraged.
Rebecca excused herself and went upstairs with her dinner. She sat in her chair and looked out of the open window as the curtains fluttered, leaving her food barely touched.
The garden was perfect in the summer evening, the temperature was still high, but the cool breeze tempered it.
She curled up and rested her head on her knees, so tired she didn’t know what to do with herself and realised at that moment, she couldn’t go on as she was. It was more than a bruised heart, more than everything that had happened over the last eighteen months, but her life had culminated to that point. Her failure with Arthur showed her exactly how much of a mess she was.
It was up to her to be civil if there was to be less tension between them, even if he miraculously was over her and went back to his ex.
That summer ended in the third week of July. It rained for eight days in a row and was cold afterwards. Rebecca and Arthur reached a middle ground of sorts.
Rebecca prepared dinner and vanished before he got there with Victoria. They never saw each other, and she missed him terribly.
She made an effort away from Arthur and put herself out there in the world again.
At film club, Joe approached her, and she found him easy to talk to. He became a friend.
Joe was going through a bit of a hard time, recently working out his sexuality and gender. Being non-binary – he kept his pronouns as he – and bisexual, particularly in his circle of friends hadn’t been easy for him to reconcile. As a result, he was moving away from his past, and strangely, they found each other. Both finding their way, they grew close, even in a few short weeks. They’d have dinner before the club, and a few drinks after. Or they’d meet up for a few and ogle the talent. It was good to have a friend.
Joe rang her on the first Wednesday of August.
“What’s up?”
Alice watched her as she flitted around the kitchen, phone wedged between her neck and shoulder and chatted briefly.
“Who was that, dear?” Alice asked.
Rebecca grinned. “Joe from film club, well he owns the little cinema. He’s asked me out to some function or other. I need to buy a dress. Do you want to come with me?”
“Joe? Wilcox?”
“Yep. You know him?”
Alice stared up at her.
“What?”
“May I say something, and I don’t want to upset you, but…”
“Say it.”
“How come you’ll go out with another man when you wouldn’t go out with Arthur?”
“There’s nothing between Arthur and me. There might have been, but Alice, he rejected me.”
“He’s head over heels.”
She sighed and sat down. “I can only assume he hasn’t said anything. You should know. There was an attraction between us. I said I didn’t want to get involved with my boss. He understood, but I changed my mind. I thought he wanted to have a relationship. He rejected me, and it was my fault, I went about things wrong, but he didn’t want to know me after that. I even offered to leave, but he wouldn’t let me. He told me I’d have to get over it. He was angry with himself and me but he got over it pretty quick.”
“Do you still care about him?”
“Alice, please don’t say anything to him, and I mean anything of what I’m going to say.”
Alice nodded.
“I love Arthur, it’s hard not to, but I’m not in a good place. Besides, he doesn’t love me, and whatever attraction there was is gone for him.” She itched to ask how he was, but Alice sat back, frowning and went back to her paper.
Through those weeks, Alice became stronger, so when she agreed to go shopping with Rebecca, she went on foot but with a walking stick. They taxied there and back, and Rebecca made sure she was offered a seat and a cup of tea when they went into the vintage formal wear boutique.
Rebecca tried on several dresses and the assistant oohed along with Alice. When she stepped out in a sleeveless black velvet dress, they were quiet. Tight in the bodice and corseted, the straight split skirt ended at the knee, and the line along the top of the bust, curved round under her arms. A rigid, pointed asymmetric fold of velvet sat on her right shoulder.
She bounced on her bare feet. “What do you think?”
“It’s perfect,” Alice said.
“Good, I love it too. Joe said posh, and this is posh. Elegant, understated, but the pleat thing gives it a bit of oomph.”
It was the most expensive thing she ever bought, but money was in the bank, and as much as she was loath to spend it, spend it she did.
She bought patent black heels and a matching clutch.
Arthur and Victoria came early on Friday before Rebecca left to meet Joe for drinks. It had been weeks.
She wore skinny jeans, a floaty t-shirt, and her wedges.
Her eyes darted between him and Victoria. Arthur didn’t appear to be well. He looked tired and drawn.
“Oh. I have to dash, bye Alice.”
“Rebecca.” The sound of his voice made her heart drop. “How are you?” He smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes.
“Well, thank you. And you two?”
Scowling, he stared hard at her. “Fine, thank you.”
It was awkward beyond words.
Victoria smiled, and there was a vicious gleam about it. “We’re great. You seem well. Out anywhere nice?”
“Film club.”
“That’s Joe’s thing, isn’t it?”
“Yeah.”
“You know him?” Vicky tilted her head, eyes narrowed, but still with a smile with all the appearance of being friendly and kind.
“Arthur introduced us.”
Arthur narrowed his eyes. “You’re friends with him?”
“Yes. It’s allowed.” Annoyed, his tone and look made her want to kick him.
“I know that,” he bit.
Alice and Victoria looked at each other.
Rebecca gave him a huge grin. “Well then. Have a nice dinner.” She flounced out, as much as she was able to, which was hardly at all. She virtually ran to the bus stop and was still annoyed when she reached the pizza place where they were meeting.
“Uh-oh.” Joe raised his eyebrows.
“What?”
“You’re pissed off.”
“I saw him. I need wine.” Anger was good, she liked anger.
Joe smiled, and they ordered. She told him what happened.
“I have to say, it rather sounds like he still likes you.”
“Maybe he does, doesn’t mean that it’s ever going to happen. I don’t know about her, though. I mean, say for argument's sake that you’re right, and he does still fancy me, why is he with her, and why is she with him? I mean, she’s clever, she would know what’s going on.”
“Vicky is an odd one.”
“You know them well?”
“At school, but we weren’t friends. We all grew up in Nattleton, and all went to the same grammar school. Maddie, Arthur’s cousin, is a rich skank. She only ever cared about marrying well. Vicky was never like that, until, you know, she was.”
Rebecca laughed.
“He loved her for years, and I’m not saying he still does, but there’s about twenty-five years of history there, I mean, that’s hard to let go of.”
She nodded, and they ate in silence.
“So, how did your date go?”
Joe huffed. “I don’t like dating. I’m going to go to a club, though, well, I mean it’s the disco night at the Red Lion.”
“Sounds classy.”
“Yeah. Other news, my lack of shagging aside, I told my mum today.”
“Holy fuck. You need to lead with that shit.”<
br />
Joe laughed. “So cute when you swear.”
Rebecca rolled her eyes. “How’d it go?”
“Okay, she wasn’t surprised, but I think she thinks I’m a gay man. She’ll get her head around it. She cried and said she only wanted me to be happy. She’s okay. She told me not to tell my dad yet. We’d have to build up to it. He’s not exactly one who communicates or deals with emotion.”
“It’ll be fine, your mum sounds nice. Keep hold of that.”
They watched the film with the others, sharing a couch, and observing the code of conduct; no noisy food, no shoes off, no hobbies, no talking, no technology, and were enthralled in the seventies Italian horror.
They all huddled around the pub table discussing it afterwards, and Rebecca joined in.
Joe dropped her home, as usual, and she found Alice still up, crying.
“What’s wrong?” Rebecca sat down and put her arm around her.
“Arthur’s so unhappy, I’m worried about him.”
She didn’t know what to say.
“Won’t you speak to him?”
“And say what? He doesn’t want me.” Rebecca soothed her hand on her shoulder.
“He loves you.”
Rebecca shook her head. “Fine. To make you happy, I’ll text him, give me a few days to think about it. Okay?”
“Thank you.” Rebecca helped Alice to bed and lay in awake for hours thinking about him. She wished it was different, but she didn’t know how it could be.
The day of the ball, Rebecca spent all afternoon getting ready. Alice sat on Rebecca’s comfy chair in the bedroom with a cool breeze on her, watching her curl her hair.
“Your hair is so pretty dear.”
“Thank you, Alice.”
“You’ve changed so much.”
“Have I?”
“You were so meek and afraid when you got here. It’s lovely seeing you blossom and have more confidence.”
She smiled at Alice in the mirror, but she was already looking away, sadness about her. “You’re really worried about him.”
“He looked like a kicked dog last night. It’s not your fault, I’m not blaming you, but you should have seen him. Sorry, I shouldn’t be talking about this, you’re going to have a lovely evening, and I know it. Joe is a sweet boy. Of course, he was ten when I knew him. His mother is nice, but his father.” She made an incredulous face and picked up her knitting.
“I worry about Joe,” Rebecca said, concentrating on pulling a section of hair at an angle through the straighteners, and let it fall carefully. She picked up another section.
“Why’s that?”
“You know we’re friends?”
“I thought there was more to it.”
“No, there isn’t.”
“Arthur thinks you’re courting him.”
“Courting? How old are you?” Rebecca let a curl of hair drop.
Alice gave her a dry stare.
“No, we’re friends. But, he – and Alice do not breathe a word of this, not to Arthur, especially not to Arthur.”
“I give you my word.”
“He’s going through some personal things right now. It’s not really my place to talk about it. His mother knows, but not his father. He doesn’t think he’ll handle it well.”
“Is he gay?”
“It’s kind of complicated.”
“These days I thought people embraced these things.”
“Maybe not if you have that kind of father.”
“Hmm. Is that why you’re close, you both have family problems?”
“Maybe, he’s really helped me, and I support him too, though I think he wants more friends like him.”
“That’s good then.”
Rebecca looked at Alice and turned. “I’ll talk to Arthur. I promise.”
“Thank you, dear.”
Eleven
A DIVERSION
The Portwell Banqueting Hall overlooked the river that snaked the south and posh side of Chadford, all along the riverside of the Hall were tables and large hanging lanterns. It was so picturesque. Shame it was pissing down.
Rebecca and Joe hovered under the awning with the milling crowd trying to escape the muggy overly warm room.
“I thought you said this was the poshest-do to go to.”
“It is.” He raised his brow. “You look gorgeous tonight… if our genders and sexualities were different.” He sighed, and she laughed, holding tightly onto his arm.
“You know I love you just as you are.” She squinted one eye at him.
He frowned his mouth down. “Yeah, no.”
She nodded in faux sadness. “So, tell me exactly what we’re doing here?”
“It’s a Chamber of Commerce thing. They do this get together with the Rotary club and discuss mutual interests, and benefits of working together. At the end of the conference, they do this.” He waved about. “One purchases a ticket, and the money goes to whatever activities they’re going to do. It’s about business participation in society. All good stuff. What?”
“Chamber of Commerce?” She looked around. “He’ll be here then.”
“Um.” The look of ‘oh shit’ passed across his face. “I didn’t even think. We can go.”
“How much were the tickets?”
He made a noncommittal noise.
“Fine. I suppose I should be easier around him or try to be. Why don’t you dance with me, seeing as you got all dolled up?” She flicked away pretend lint from his tux, and he grinned. “Besides, this dress cost me a packet.”
Joe led, and she followed. They were the only couple dancing inside as it was a bit early.
“I feel like a prat,” he said.
“You know if I can do it, you can.”
“Shall we dip?”
“Let’s dip.”
Joe made a dramatic dip, and she opened her eyes as he paused, and saw an upside-down Arthur.
She tapped Joe, who brought them up.
“Don’t look, he’s here.” Joe widened his eyes.
“I know. I saw him.”
“What shall we do?”
“Keep dancing.”
They did, and when the music ended, he escorted her off the dancefloor, and they went to the bar. A shot later, and a glass of champagne in hand, they circuited.
Rebecca caught sight of Arthur and Vicky. She looked stunning in a slim full-length jade dress, and she looked Rebecca up and down but spoke to Joe as they approached. She reminded her of a shark.
“How are you, it’s been an age.”
“Well, thanks, and you?” He gave her a condescending smile.
Rebecca noticed a few things. Arthur was thinner, and astonishing in his tux, even if he looked like shit. She’d tried not to notice him on Friday, but she couldn’t help staring right then.
He was looking at her intently, and then he blinked and spoke. “May I have this dance?” With his gaze fixed on her necklace, the only jewellery she wore, she resisted touching the pendant he’d given her.
“Okay.” She meant to say no but couldn’t.
Arthur led her out, as Vicky’s mouth opened, and Joe took Victoria by the arm. Rebecca felt her eyes bore into them, but she didn’t care, right then, there was nothing but Arthur.
They barely moved, not standing too close. She watched his jaw tick and pained eyes. Her heart lurched. “I’m glad you asked me.”
“You are?”
“Alice is worried about you.”
“Work is full on at the minute.”
She nodded and left it at that, but she wanted to hold him close and take it away. Rebecca had never seen anyone so broken, except maybe herself once.
She shifted in his hold and stepped closer.
“I miss this. Your company.”
He looked into her eyes then. “I miss you too.”
“I’m sorry I ruined it.”
“You didn’t. I virtually assaulted
you. I don’t know why I asked you to dance, I shouldn’t have.” He tried to pull away, but she held tight.
Arthur blinked, looking into her eyes, anger and sorrow burning there.
She wet her lips, pushing against the ache in her heart. “Arthur, no, tell me that isn’t what you think?”
His eyes said it all, and he looked away.
“You didn’t; please listen.” Tears came to her eyes. “I know what assault is, if anyone does, it’s me. That is not what happened. I wanted you so much, and I couldn’t stay away from you. It was unfortunate I had the last vodka. Nothing really happened. We kissed, which was as much as we ever did. I wasn’t ready, I admit that, but I would never have blamed you.”
They had stopped moving, his eyes closed. “When you told me everything, I…”
“I know, I know.” She urged him to dance, and he breathed again. She put her head on his chest. It felt so right there.
“I’m happy for you. You seem really happy, and you deserve it,” he said in a flat voice.
“So do you.”
“I think it’s too late for that.”
She hovered, about to say something, anything to let him know, to make him understand when Vicky interrupted with practised charm. “Excuse me, may I?”
The look that Arthur shot her was vicious.
“Of course,” Rebecca said.
Joe ushered her away and out to the patio. “All right?”
“No, for the love of kittens, no.” She looked back, and Arthur was looking at her through the large open doors.
“He’s got it bad.” Joe ushered her along.
“He thinks he assaulted me.”
“What the fuck?”
She told him about that night in more detail.
“So, he thinks he nearly raped you?” he hiss-whispered the words, and she nodded. “Jesus. No wonder he looks like shit. You explained, though right?”
“Yes, I don’t know if he really believed me.”
“Shit, you need to make him understand that.”
“I can’t when the evil girlfriend is stalking his every move.”
“And he thinks we’re a couple?”
“Yep.”
“Right. Plan of action.” He downed a drink he snagged from a passing waiter. “We need to get her away from him, and out of sight.”
Getting a Life (New City Series Book 4) Page 11
