by Rajiv Joseph
SURESH: No.
ANDY: So . . . Did you come here for . . . I mean . . . Can I get you something?
SURESH: I came over to, you know . . . she uh . . . she packed some of my stuff in her luggage cause I was out of space, so I came over to get it. What about you?
ANDY: Nothing. Just, you know. Thought Ilana and I would eat a little dinner.
SURESH: Oh.
Awkward silence.
ANDY: Jeez! I’m sorry, buddy, do you want some bread?
SURESH: No thanks.
ANDY: It’s got kalamata olives baked into it. Can you believe that?
SURESH: Naw, man. I’m cool.
ANDY: So? How was Japan?
SURESH: Japan was crazy.
ANDY: That’s great!
SURESH: Yeah.
ANDY: And the conference?
SURESH: Crazy.
ANDY: Great!
SURESH: Yeah.
Awkward silence.
ANDY: I wonder where she is?
SURESH: Yeah.
Awkward silence.
ANDY: How was the flight?
SURESH: Awright.
ANDY: Was there a movie?
SURESH: I guess. I didn’t really watch.
ANDY: I always thought, if I took a long trip, I’d watch all the movies.
SURESH: Yeah.
ANDY: Did Ilana have a good time?
SURESH: I guess.
ANDY: Are you okay?
SURESH: Huh? Yeah. Yeah, I’m cool.
Long flight, you know?
ANDY: Sure.
You must have had like two or three movies on that flight.
SURESH: Yeah.
ANDY: Did Ilana watch the movies?
SURESH: I dunno. We didn’t sit together.
ANDY: You didn’t? Why not?
SURESH: We did on the way over, but not on the way back. She, um . . . She like upgraded her ticket? First class. And I was back in coach. Economy style, you know?
ANDY: Wow. First class?
SURESH: They let the first class off the plane first. And so . . . I guess I figured she’d be here by now.
ANDY: Huh.
So she just . . . left you at the airport? That doesn’t seem . . . I mean, that’s strange.
SURESH: She’s a strange lady.
ANDY: Did you piss her off again?
SURESH: Not that I know of.
We got up this morning to leave? And she was . . . I don’t know. She sort of told me that, you know . . . that this thing was finished.
ANDY: What thing?
SURESH: You know, like my apprenticeship. My senior project. She told me I was done. That I should, you know, stop coming here and everything.
ANDY: But why?
SURESH: You tell me, man. I don’t understand anything she does.
ANDY: I don’t understand her. I mean . . . I don’t understand her at all.
SURESH: Bitch.
ANDY: (sternly) Hey. Watch it.
SURESH: I’m just saying.
ANDY: You don’t call Ilana that.
SURESH: I know.
ANDY: Don’t use that word, Suresh. Just don’t use it.
SURESH: I know.
ANDY: So . . . what about your senior project.
SURESH: It’s over. She gave me an A. I’m done, man.
I’m done with high school.
ANDY: Well . . . Congratulations.
SURESH: Yeah. Yeah, thanks.
It’s just that, you know . . .
I don’t know.
I don’t want to be done with high school.
I liked high school, you know?
ANDY: I know.
SURESH: I’ll never forget this time in my life.
ANDY: I know.
Beat.
ANDY: You’re going to be okay, you know Suresh?
SURESH: I don’t know.
ANDY: What. What don’t you know?
SURESH: (quietly) I’m having kind of a rough time.
ANDY: (very concerned)
Why? What? What’s going on?
SURESH: I don’t know, man.
ANDY: Come here, buddy. What’s going on with you?
Suresh shrugs.
ANDY: Japan was good, right? I mean, it sounds like you had a great time . . .
SURESH: I liked Japan, you know, the origami thing? The conference? I learned a lot.
But Nagasaki, man, it’s kind of a weird place. I felt like I was kind of a different person there. And I think Ilana did too. And for one week, I got to be someone else. And now I’m back to being me. Except I still remember being someone else, and I don’t know. It’s like I’m two things at once. But I shouldn’t be. Nobody should be. You should be one thing at once.
(beat; Suresh looks around him) I love this place.
It’s like a paper zoo.
They both look around at everything.
ANDY: I know.
Beat.
SURESH: I never would have met her if you hadn’t, you know . . . You brought me here.
ANDY: I’m glad this was good for you.
SURESH: I don’t know if it was good for me.
But I definitely feel different.
ANDY: Suresh, look at me.
Suresh does.
ANDY: You’re amazing to me.
You’re the most exceptional student I’ve ever had and I don’t know if I taught you anything, but I’ve learned a lot from watching you. You’re brave. You have smarts, sure. But it’s your heart. It’s big and strong and it’s going to serve you well. So listen to it. It’s a reliable narrator, you understand me?
SURESH: Yeah.
ANDY: You’re done with high school now, but if you ever need anything . . . I mean anything . . . you come to me. You come to me, buddy.
Suresh covers his face for a moment, and paces around, racked with guilt.
SURESH: Aw shit, man.
ANDY: What’s wrong?
SURESH: I feel really bad about things, Fro Dog. I’m sorry. I feel really bad.
ANDY: About what?
SURESH: I don’t know.
Sometimes I just don’t know how to act around people.
ANDY: I know what you mean.
Beat.
ANDY: I count my blessings.
SURESH: Yeah, I should do that, too.
ANDY: No, I literally count them.
(takes out his book) I’ve been doing it since I was twelve. When I think of one, I write it down in this book.
(opens it) Number 1: My health.
That’s pretty basic.
Number 2: I can still go bowling, even with my elbow.
I just count them.
SURESH: You write them down? How many you got?
Andy hands him the book. Suresh flips through it.
ANDY: I number them. I have like over eight thousand blessings in here.
It helps. It’s just a nice thing to do.
You should try it.
Suresh finds one and reads it.
SURESH: “Number 4,722: I bought a really excellent rake. It rakes really well. All the leaves just get raked, but they don’t get stuck in the rake. And it wasn’t that expensive.”
(he looks up at Andy) Fro Dog . . . A rake?
ANDY: Hey, I’m just saying . . . keep your eyes peeled.
Suresh hands the book back to Andy.
SURESH: Mr. Froling . . .
ANDY: Mr. Froling?
SURESH: When the school year started . . . you know . . . I dropped out of Calc Club . . .
ANDY: Come on, it’s okay.
SURESH: I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I always liked Calc Club.
ANDY: Calc Club always liked you.
SURESH: Yeah.
Also? Mr. Froling?
ANDY: Why do you keep calling me that?
Ilana enters.
She’s startled by everyone in her place.
SURESH: Yo.
ILANA: What’s going on here?!
ANDY: Well, I made dinner. And then Suresh s
topped by, and . . .
ILANA: Suresh, what’s going on?
SURESH: Nothing.
ILANA: You startled me.
ANDY: We were just chatting.
ILANA: (to Suresh) What are you doing here?
SURESH: Why’d you have to ditch me at the airport?
ILANA: I didn’t ditch you. I just left.
SURESH: I wanted to talk to you.
ILANA: Well, we can’t talk right now.
SURESH: Why are you being this way?
ILANA: Suresh . . . Please . . . let’s just . . . Just let this go. Let it go.
SURESH: I don’t want to let it go.
ILANA: You have to.
ANDY: Boy, you guys are like jet-lagged or something. Why doesn’t everyone just relax? Let’s have some food. Look, I’ve got a tapenade.
ILANA: Suresh, nothing happened. Nothing happened.
SURESH: Something happened. I don’t know what, but things are different now.
ANDY: Can someone tell me what’s going on?
A beat. Andy and Suresh look to Ilana to explain.
ILANA: Can I take a moment to gather my thoughts? I mean, we just got home, can I just . . . can I sit here for a second?
Ilana sits on the couch. Suresh and Andy both look at her. A beat.
SURESH: I know you’re wigging out.
ILANA: I’m not wigging out.
SURESH: I’m just saying, last night . . . last night . . .
I don’t know what the word is.
ANDY: Um . . . what exactly happened last night?
SURESH: It wasn’t even really “last night” what with the time change and everything. I think. I’m all messed up with my internal clock.
ILANA: You’re reading into something that wasn’t there. I’m sorry if you’re confused, but nothing happened.
SURESH: Nothing happened? We kissed. We slept in the same bed. We woke up all tangled up with each other. That happened.
ANDY: What?
SURESH: Fro Dog, I’m sorry, man.
ANDY: What do you mean you kissed?
ILANA: Suresh! Andy, we didn’t kiss.
SURESH: Yeah we did. We kissed twice. Three times, even.
ILANA: I mean, we did, briefly, but it wasn’t a real kiss . . .
ANDY: You kissed him?
ILANA: It wasn’t . . . it wasn’t inappropriate. Or maybe it was, but Andy, you have to listen to me . . .
ANDY: I’m listening.
SURESH: Fro Dog . . .
Andy puts his hand up, to quiet Suresh.
ILANA: It isn’t what you think . . .
ANDY: I don’t think anything right now. Except that you . . . kissed . . . my student . . . You slept . . . you slept with him?
ILANA: No! Not like that! We fell asleep in the same bed. Look, it was a strange moment. But it didn’t mean anything.
ANDY: Ilana . . . We’re talking about my student here. I brought you my student. I entrusted to you a kid who . . . this kid . . . this kid . . . Ilana!
ILANA: Nothing happened!
ANDY: This is like predatory!
ILANA: It wasn’t predatory.
ANDY: Yes it is!
ILANA: Suresh, was it predatory?
SURESH: Naw.
ILANA: See?
ANDY: Shut up, Suresh! The adults are talking right now. The adults, Ilana.
ILANA: It was this weird moment between us. But nothing happened. I held him. I just held him.
ANDY: You held him? Do you know what would happen to me if I held a student?
ILANA: Andy, you’re not getting this . . .
ANDY: I’d be fired! Because it crosses a line! To say nothing of kissing and sleeping in the same bed in a hotel! Lines crossed, Ilana! Lines crossed!
ILANA: Okay! But Andy, you weren’t there! You don’t understand the situation!
ANDY: I don’t need to!
ILANA: Yes you do! Because I’m not . . . Suresh and I have a different relationship . . .
ANDY: No you don’t! That was not part of the agreement! He comes to you to do a senior project . . . You take him to Nagasaki . . . I mean, the way you painted that . . . he’s your protégé . . . he’s your apprentice . . . he’d learn so much. I hardly thought this was the kind of education you had in mind.
SURESH: Yo, Fro Dog . . .
ANDY: Don’t “Fro Dog” me!
SURESH: It was different. I mean, it was weird, but I kissed her, she didn’t kiss me.
ILANA: You see? Nothing happened.
SURESH: No, something happened! I kissed you!
ILANA: And I kissed you back and it was wrong and I wanted . . . I wanted something but I didn’t take it!
ANDY: He’s seventeen years old!
SURESH: I’m eighteen.
ILANA: He’s eighteen.
ANDY: He’s a kid! For God’s sake, Ilana, he’s a kid!
ILANA: I did the right thing!
Andy paces, not knowing what to do with himsel f.
ANDY: I don’t understand how you can . . .
SURESH: Fro Dog, man . . . I’m sorry . . .
I don’t know what happened.
It was a crazy night. I feel like I was an insect and I molted.
I mean, it’s why I came here today, Ilana. I just need to talk to you.
I molted and now I don’t recognize myself.
ILANA: Yeah, well, welcome to the rest of your life.
ANDY: No. No, you don’t say that to him. Suresh, you go ahead and you figure this out, like you figure everything out. You’re always going to recognize yourself. That’s your gift, buddy. Don’t let her tell you different.
She doesn’t know.
ILANA: It was a kiss! It was just a kiss! It doesn’t mean anything!
ANDY: It doesn’t mean anything?
(he takes out his book) I’ve been counting my blessings my whole life. Putting them in this book.
But the best blessing I ever wrote in here, the blessing that made me feel the most blessed was number 7,906.
(he reads it) Ilana Andrews kissed me.
Ilana Andrews kissed me.
Ilana Andrews kissed me.
(he looks up) I had to write it three times.
ILANA: Andy . . .
ANDY: What a joke.
ILANA: Can you please calm down?
ANDY: I’m trying! I’m trying to figure out why I shouldn’t feel totally betrayed right now, but I can’t. I’m sorry, I can’t.
ILANA: But you do it all the time! Your book, you’re always finding the silver lining, finding blessings in the worst things . . .
ANDY: It’s not easy, okay?! It doesn’t just happen. It takes time. It takes time for me to do that.
He flips through the pages.
ANDY: I don’t just sit around thinking everything is perfect all the time.
(he rips a page out) This stuff is just . . . it’s just . . . it’s not all true, it’s things I hope for!
(he rips another page out) But what is it anyway? Nothing. It means nothing.
Andy starts ripping more pages out of his book, tearing his book up.
ILANA: What are you doing!
ANDY: Just take it. Take it, take it, take it, take it, take it.
A pile of pages on the floor.
ILANA: Andy . . . don’t do this! Please, don’t, I made a mistake, okay? Just don’t do this!
ANDY: I never wanted you to read that. It was every last thing about me and you read it and then you just walk away and you humiliate me. So keep it. Keep it all, but I have to leave.
Andy exits.
Ilana, holding some loose papers, drops them, runs to the door after Andy, but he’s gone.
Ilana doesn’t move. She stands at the doorway for a long moment.
Suresh starts to gather up the papers.
ILANA: Stop. Don’t do that.
SURESH: I’m just gonna pick them up.
ILANA: Stop it! Suresh! Don’t pick them up! I swear to God, don’t pick them up!
Suresh
continues to pick up the papers, quickly.
Ilana goes to him and grabs his face like a child.
ILANA: What did I say to you!? Put those down! Put them down! Drop the papers, Suresh. Drop them now. Let them go. Let go of the paper.
Let go.
Let go now.
Suresh puts his hand over hers and holds it to his face for a moment and drops the papers.
ILANA: It’s not your mess. You don’t need to clean it up.
SURESH: I want to.
ILANA: It’s not yours to clean.
SURESH: Fro Dog wrote his blessings in that book! That stuff is important! You should at least pick it up. That would be the right thing to do, you know?
ILANA: You need to go. You need to go home now. I can’t help you. I’m sorry I never could. Everything I touch I hurt.
SURESH: Not me.
(beat) Not me, Ilana.
You didn’t hurt me.
Ilana doesn’t answer. She looks through the pages.
SURESH: I gotta start doing that. Counting my blessings and everything. Fro Dog, he’s usually right about things, you know?
My health. Got that. Got to remember that.
Meeting you.
Coming here.
Hanging with you in the afternoons and everything.
Blessings.
You know.
Meeting you.
Going to Japan with you.
Nagasaki.
Folding you stuff.
Little rabbits, dogs, T. rexes, little birds I folded for you.
Being able to come here. Meeting you. Knowing you.
You hooked me up this semester.
That’s a blessing, you know?
I gotta remember it. I always will.
Suresh gets his bags and starts to leave, but looks at her.
They look at each other. She raises a fist to him. He bumps it with his fist. He exits.
After a beat, Ilana goes to the pages on the floor and gathers them up very carefully.
She takes them to her desk and puts them on the desk, looking through them.
She takes a piece of folding paper and returns to the couch. She stares at the paper and then slowly makes a single fold.
BENGAL TIGER AT THE BAGHDAD ZOO
PRODUCTION HISTORY
Bengal Tiger at the Baghdad Zoo had its world premiere on May 10, 2009, at the Kirk Douglas Theatre in Culver City, California, in a production by Center Theatre Group. Moisés Kaufman, Director; Derek McLane, Sets; David Zinn, Costumes; David Lander, Lighting; Cricket S. Myers, Sound; Kathryn Bostic, Music; Bobby C. King, Fight Director; Vanessa J. Noon, Production Stage Manager.
