He stood two heads taller than me. His eyes were piercing, blazing jewels of knowledge that seemed to always study me like a fascinating riddle.
And he’d grown far more handsome than I could have ever imagined when first I’d met the boy so many years ago. His features now were sharper, stronger, and far more masculine. His shoulders broad, his chest massive.
The only youth I still saw in him was his ability to laugh and tease me so easily.
Truth of it was, somedays it was difficult to remember that my heart was not my own to give away. Though I desperately yearned with every fiber of my being that it were so.
“Lena?” he asked again, not unkindly, but with a note of impatience.
I sighed, tossing up my hands. “It is...of a delicate nature.”
He glowered. “If you mean to imply that it involves the mating of a male to a female, I’m well versed.”
I snapped to, suddenly feeling a horrible, leeching emotion slink and slither through my marrow. “You have lain with another?”
The accusation came out much sharper than I’d intended.
His brows pulled down tight, and then those sea-glass-blue eyes of his sparkled with laughter. “Are you jealous, my Lena?”
I slapped his chest, turning my face to the side. Far more jealous than I had any right to be. He was a child.
But he wasn’t really, was he?
“You are a devil, and I think I should hate you.”
I could practically hear his smolder.
“Should. But you don’t.”
He grabbed my hand, lifted a finger to his nose, and sniffed me. He always did that. Never pressed his lips to mine, just sniffed me.
I rather feared it might be the most erotic thing to ever have happened to me in my young life.
“I...I do.” My tremble belied my words.
His fingers were gentle, his claws so cautious on my tender flesh as he turned my face to his. “Coupling is common in my realm. We do not hide our body’s needs from one another. It seems pointless to pretend that we do not feel what we feel.”
I arched a brow. I really should drop the matter, but it suddenly took on great importance to me. “Have you slept with another, Ragoth?”
Lips curling into a smile that had my pulse racing, he whispered, “No. I claimed you. You shall be my first, my one, and my only. We dragons bond for life. My eye could never be turned to another.”
Dear gods, the things he said to me.
“And you, Lena, have you lain with another?”
I gave a feeble laugh at that, glanced down at my quite unattractive body, and snorted. “Who would have me?”
A heavy rumble tore through the night, piercing through me like an arrow let loose.
“Dragonborne only take the best. The most beautiful and desirable of all things.” His knuckles traced my cheek.
Suddenly I couldn’t seem to catch a proper breath. My lips parted just slightly. I could never kiss him. Could never allow him any privileges; should I do it, I knew my heart would be lost to him forever.
“Skin as soft as petals. Hair the color of Apollo’s sun, and eyes that see straight through me. You glow like Freyr’s elves. How could all men not desire you?”
He always talked of my glow. A glow I’d never seen, but I liked that he did.
I patted his hand, needing to break this contact now. The words he whispered to me, they were too dangerous, too...wonderful. All my life I’d wanted to know what it meant to be wanted, cherished. Never in my dreams could I have imagined I’d find that with a dragonborne.
Moving my jaw away from his touch, I shook my head. “If anyone were to learn of my true nature, then and only then am I valuable. But men aplenty have seen me, and none of them look at me as you do.”
“Then they are fools.” He hiked up a knee and leaned back on one hand. Reclining almost like he would while in dragon form.
I couldn’t help but smile. The boy was probably the most dangerous creature in all of Kingdom, and yet I knew that he would never harm me.
There was comfort in knowing that.
“What is so terribly valuable about being a morphling anyway?”
For so long I’d kept this part of my life hidden from him. It’d felt too personal and humiliating to share, but I was starting to feel our time together coming at an end. And if memories were all I’d ever have, then I had no wish to regret any of them.
“You say you know of coupling; fine then, a morphling is a rare chance of fate. There is no breed of morphlings, per se. We are born, all females, and blessed with the mark of a bloodred heart branded upon our left breast.”
I touched my chest, and his fingers briefly flitted over mine. “What does it mean?”
Feeling hot and twitchy of a sudden, I scooted back on my bottom a little, not wanting him to continue his affections toward me.
“As humans we are as weak as the next. But once bonded, we become a boon to our mate. We take on not only his powers, but we desire above all things to please him in every way.”
His jaw jutted out. “So you have intercourse, and suddenly you are in love?” He slapped his palms together so loud a boom reverberated through the trees, causing the leaves to rustle like a mighty wind had just passed over them.
I startled. He kept so much of his power hidden from me. I’d not known he could do that. But I wasn’t scared. It’d...thrilled me. I clutched at my chest.
“I suppose that is the gist of it,” I said breathlessly and not without a touch of sadness too. “I’ve often wondered why it was that what should have been a gift was really more of a curse to us. I do not want to be forced to love another against my will. But all stories say that morphling love feels the same as actual love...” My words drifted off, and I ached as a hollow void spread through my heart.
Somehow I did not think I would ever feel for the king what I now felt for my dragon. How could I?
I knew nothing of this king. But I knew my boy. Knew that if I danced for him, he’d sit enthralled before me, watching me as though I were something exotic and beautiful.
Or when he’d tell me exploits of his time with his tutors, how his eyes would sparkle when he’d done something terribly devilish. Or that sometimes he and his brother didn’t get on, because Ragoth was beginning to believe he no longer wanted to be a successor to the crown.
That someday he might even be a freed dragon. We’d talked often of his breaking the oath of claimanentship (that is to say, his right to the crown, should anything happen to his brother, Alwyn).
After three years, I knew my devil as well as one friend could know another.
Jumping to his feet, Ragoth paced. Rubbing his jaw so hard I was afraid he’d puncture himself with his sharp claws. He moved his hands to his head, mussing his thick, wavy hair, causing it to poke out in many different directions.
I saw the youth then, and I smiled sadly. Time was our greatest enemy now.
“I do not wish this, Lena; you belong to me.” His slitted eyes blazed.
Feeling a little like growling at his highhanded manner, I shot to my feet and snapped a finger under his nose. “I am mine. I am not the king’s, and I am most certainly not yours. I am mine. Mine.”
I stomped my foot, feeling the old anger and pain surge to the fore. But stomping a foot in a fit of rage was all I could do. I was weak, pathetic, with no powers of my own. I was helpless to my fate, and I knew it.
Even though my heart desired that I was mine, I was not. I was Zerelda’s. She owned my soul, which she would not release until the moment I united my hand to the king’s. When I would once more be forced to bind my will to someone else’s whims and tender mercies.
Ragoth held out a hand to me. “Lena, I am sorry, I did not mean to imply—”
Knowing I was about to cry again and not wanting him to see it, I twirled on my heel and ran for the cottage. I needed to get away from him; from the things he made me feel, from the hope that bloomed stronger and stronger with each passin
g day that somehow, someway I’d be released from this torment.
He called my name, but I didn’t turn back.
~*~
Ragoth
A week had passed since that night, and I was half out of my mind with fear, worry, and most of all, grief. She refused to come to me. And though I could drag her from her home if I so chose, I wanted the choice to be hers.
I couldn’t lose my Lena. I simply wouldn’t allow it. Somehow I’d claim her, and if that meant snatching her out from under the hag’s nose, I’d do it. I’d do anything to make her mine permanently.
I paced the halls of my chambers in dragon form, keeping my wings tightly banded to my side. My walls were singed a deep black, my floors gleamed like polished ebony from the heat that still wafted off it. My bed was ruined. Nothing but a heap of rubble now.
My door slammed open, and I saw my brother glaring at me.
We were practically the same height now. I was mere days away from my pledging; soon I’d be able to challenge him for the right to rule from the throne of Drakon as first in line once mother stepped down.
But I wanted no part of this infernal world anymore. Once, I’d thought there could be no greater honor than being guardian of Zeus’s orchard; now, all I could dream of was a land that teemed with madness and lunacy and at its center a blond-haired goddess who’d stolen my soul.
“I am trying to sleep, Ragoth,” Alwyn snapped at me, rubbing at his bloodshot eyes with his forearm.
The sun was at its zenith. The castle quiet. And I was in a foul mood.
Alwyn and I looked practically identical in every way, except for our eyes. Where mine were blue, his were golden. Our dragon form was similar too, except for our wings. Mine were streaked with veins of aquamarine, and his with gold.
Leave me be, brother, I said to him with my mind. I was irritable, but even I wasn’t foolish enough to want to face mother’s wrath if I woke her.
He scented the air. I knew what he smelled. I’d tried to dampen myself, but my need for Lena mingled with my coming pledge made it impossible for me to hide.
“You reek of the mating scent,” he snapped.
I shook my massive head at him, tongue flickering out in a threatening pose. I will eat you.
He snorted, leaning casually against the door. “You can try. Who is she?”
Why do you care? My thoughts were cross.
I bathed him in a jet of steam so hot, his body sparked. But dragonborne were immune to one another. He gazed at his now wrinkled shirt then glared up at me.
“Answer me, boy, before I thrash you.” The heavy lilt of dragonish lingered on his tongue.
I am not a boy!
“Until your pledging, you are.” He smirked, and I wanted to pound him.
I spread my wings in a threatening pose.
“Just try, hatchling.”
Any other day, I would have taken him up on the offer. Wanting nothing more than to release my rage through battle. But I did not wish to visit Lena with a broken arm.
Sensing my threats were nothing now more than words, he yawned, stretched his arms above his head, and said, “Whoever she is, she’d better be nobility.”
Why?
He sighed, and when he stepped into my room, no longer was he aggressive with me. His eyes were thoughtful. A few years separated us, but of all my family, Alwyn was the only member who actually spoke to me with any sort of affection.
“Because our kiss can be lethal to anyone not of royal blood.”
A cold chill swept down my spine. Transforming to male form, I shook my head. “You lie.”
But I knew he hadn’t when a dawning recognition lit through his eyes. “You would have been taught this at your pledging. Whoever she is, Ragoth, release her now before it’s too late for you.”
Once a dragon male bonded, we bonded for life. To lose our most valued treasure could also cause even the most fearsome of us to succumb to insanity.
I shivered at the thought.
“I can’t, Alwyn. She is mine,” I said it softly, haltingly, only just now aware of the gravity of that statement.
What would happen to me if Lena left me? Would I become mad, like my infamous great-great-great uncle Jayks? Legend told that on the night of his betrothal his ladylove died of a spelled fever, and that for the rest of his days until his passing the only thing he did was rape, pillage, and kill. Lost to the madness of his own mind.
But surely that could not happen to me. Surely there’d been something inside of him that was already wicked to begin with. Most dragons were prone to bouts of irrational anger and rage anyway, and mother had always told me just how very different I was from the rest of them.
I did not fit into this family; I was not of the same steely stock as they. Those were her very words to me, over and over and over, for years it’s all I’d heard.
You’re not as smart as Alwyn. As brave as Alwyn. As handsome as Alwyn. Why can’t you be more like your brother, he’s such a good dragon...
But I was less interested in hoarding treasures and stones, the only thing that brought me joy in this life was lying beside a girl who glowed blue as I watched her speak to the birds in the trees and smile as she told me of her day.
But I couldn’t shake the gnawing worry now. What if I couldn’t disrupt this binding of hers to the king, would I become mad like old uncle Jayks?
No, I would not even think on that. I would break their pact, one way or another. I had to, there was simply no other choice for me in the matter.
Instead of fury or disgust, there was pity for me shining in his golden eyes. “Then you are a fool.”
Maybe I was, but asking me to walk away from Lena was the same as asking him to cut out his heart and hand it to me. One could not survive without the other.
“Why did you reject our parents’ match?” I’d never had a chance to ask him.
Inhaling deeply, he stared out the window and said in monotone, “I was not ready for that level of responsibility. And I did not love her.”
“What is love other than a petty emotion?” I responded to him as our father had often done to us. But no sooner had I said it than I felt the wrongness of it.
His eyes were thoughtful when he turned them to me. “You want this woman. Why?”
I knew what he was getting at. Wondering if I loved my Lena. And the only answer I had was, “I don’t know. I claimed her years ago.”
“And what is that, if not love?” he asked simply.
My brother was seldom given to maudlin fancy, so to hear him speak of this, it actually had me thinking. Did I love her? Were those the emotions I felt?
I thought of my parents and how cold, how distant their union was. It’d been one of convenience, of uniting two houses and making them stronger for it. Alwyn and I had been conceived out of a sense of duty; their part done, they no longer even shared the same tower.
I frowned. Could I do that with Lena? Take her and squire her away, separate myself from her by miles of stones and halls between us?
When I thought of touching her body, it was not out of a sense of duty either. I wanted to imprint my scent on her flesh, wanted to let it be known to one and all that the female was mine and mine alone.
Alwyn shrugged. “Ragoth, if what you feel runs deeper than it should, do not return to her. Cut ties now. It is not fair to you or to her.”
There was so much my brother still didn’t know. Not only was Lena not of Olympus, she was human. Not even dragonborne.
So much of who I was as a people I still didn’t know; I wouldn’t know all of it until my pledging. I’d not known I couldn’t kiss her, but what if it was more than that? Could a dragonborne and a human even bond? What was it that I felt?
My brother didn’t speak another word, simply turned and returned to his room. I walked over to my window, brain fogged by exhaustion and questions. So, so many questions.
Maybe I should leave her. If I could never have her, then what was the point of continuing t
o spend time together? But then all I had to do was think about her coming nuptials to the king and I wanted to choke something. Wanted to rend it limb from limb with my sharp, vicious teeth.
Grinding my jaw, I watched as the sun set, watched as the goddess Nyx floated over the sky, bringing her darkness with her. Watched as the night twinkled with the light of millions of stars, and felt frozen by indecision.
Only a few hours ago I was sure I had no choice but to release her. Now, I couldn’t seem to stop shivering at the thought of it.
“What if Alwyn lied?” I whispered to the breeze.
In an instant I knew I was no longer alone in my room. The pressure of power pulled at me, made my flesh tingle.
Turning, I lifted a brow, studying the woman before me.
A woman of myth and legend. Her blond hair hung like a fall of golden water down around her feet. She wore no clothing, and the hair—as though charmed with a life of its own—always seemed to be strategically placed in such a way so as not to reveal more than tantalizing peeks of her radiant flesh.
Dropping to a knee, I bowed before the goddess of love herself.
Aphrodite’s violet eyes shimmered with laughter. “I heard you call for me, Ragoth Nur. Why?”
Wiggling her fingers, she motioned for me to stand. I did, leaning against the windowsill. “I did not call you.”
“Oh, but you did, dragonborne. I felt the weight of your heart; it grieves me to see one so loyal as you in such a state.”
Twisting my lips, I shook my head. “You can only listen to a soul in love. I am not—”
Her smile was knowing. “Aren’t you? If, as you say, I can only listen to a soul in love, then why else would I be here?”
I turned my face to the side. The knowledge of what I felt, confirmed to me from her lips, brought not a measure of peace. In fact, it made me feel ill.
“Zelena Hermosa,” she whispered, “a morphling due to marry the king of hearts. Yes, I know all about her.”
I wasn’t sure why she was here. Wasn’t sure what pearls of wisdom she could possibly impart to me. “Alwyn says I cannot mate a woman not of royal blood.”
The Passionate Queen (Dark Queens Book 2) Page 5
