by Tara Rose
“Neither do I. I’m very confused right now.”
“I know you are. I’m not any happier about him possibly being here than you are. I have just as much at stake here, you know. I heard him threaten Zakia that night, too.”
“But what does he think he’s going to change all these years later? Did something happen in Chicago to bring all this up again?”
“I’m working on finding that out because the same thought occurred to me when Maddox told me about seeing someone he swore was Eddie. Why now, after all this time? He was never charged. It’s a ten year old case. What happened to set him off?”
“So you’ve asked your friends in Chicago for help?” It was the first time she’d felt hope that Zakia might find justice after all.
“I don’t really have friends in Chicago anymore. But I’ve reached out to the few I know and can trust. I may not find out anything, but I’m going to try.”
“Thank you.”
Hugh rubbed her shoulder again. “Do you still believe Brynn is here for any reason other than what she told us? To start a new job? Do you believe her now that she isn’t still involved with any of the people you two knew back then?”
The corners of Sean’s mouth lifted. “Yeah, I do. I owe all three of you an explanation. I was very surprised to see her, and that coupled with Maddox recently spotting Eddie set me off inside Nan’s Place. We’d just found Teresa being held by Ray Hammond, and she was nearly killed by him as well. And it’s never fun when a cop has to shoot someone. It was a combination of things yesterday morning, and seeing you after all this time was just too much for me to handle in a professional manner.”
That was as close as she was going to come to hearing him say “I’m sorry,” so she took it. “Thank you.”
Sean rose and picked up the folder. “I need to get some sleep. I ended up working all night. If I hear anything from Chicago I’ll let you know right away.”
Hugh and Ryder walked him to the door, but Brynn stayed where she was, playing that night over in her mind again. The fact that she might never find the truth bothered her, but at least now she understood Sean’s part in it. He hadn’t covered up anything, and he no longer believed she was a threat to him or this town. That was what she’d wanted.
But where did that leave them as far as Eddie Van Buren was concerned? The sooner Brynn had that answer, the better she’d feel.
Chapter Ten
Brynn stared at the kitchen wall for long moments, even when both men took seats at the table again, and asked her what she’d like to do that day. “I wish I knew. I’m sorry. I’m afraid I won’t be great company today.”
“It doesn’t matter,” said Ryder. “We still want to be with you. Do you want to go for a drive? It’s a beautiful day already. We could visit the West Baden Springs Hotel in French Lick. It’s a three-hour ride, but we have all day. Have you ever been there?”
“No, but I’ve heard of it.”
“We went there all the time when I was a kid,” said Hugh, “and Ryder usually came with us. I think you’d really enjoy it. What do you say?”
She smiled. “I think that’s a perfect idea.” A three-hour ride one way sounded perfect to her. To hell with how late they got back. It’s not like her job right now consisted of anything mentally taxing. She’d rather spend the day away from Racy with Hugh and Ryder. She’d deal with reality again when she had to.
On the trip down Interstate 65, she asked them about their childhoods and learned they really had been friends all their lives, or at least since kindergarten, even though they’d grown up on opposite ends of town and in very different environments.
“Even when we were each away at school,” said Hugh, “we stayed friends.”
“Where did you go to school?”
“IU in Bloomington. We’ll pass close to it on the way to the resort.”
“What about you?” she asked Ryder.
“I have a bachelor of science in electrical engineering technology from ITT in Indy.”
She turned in her seat to face the back, her brows raised. “No wonder you said you get hassled about remaining a line tech. There’s so much you could do with that.”
He nodded. “I know. But I love my work.”
“That’s admirable. Not many people would do what you’re doing.”
Ryder grinned at her in a way that brought back every delicious memory of last night. “And I’ve never met a girl who didn’t try to talk me into doing more with my life.”
She shook her head. “I’d never do that to anyone. If you’re happy at your work, that’s half the battle.”
“So what about you?” asked Hugh. “Tell us about your childhood.”
“There’s not much to tell. I have three older sisters who are all married with kids. No family fortunes or distinguished careers in my family. I’m the oddball. The one who wasn’t looking for a husband by the time she was in high school.”
“How did you become interested in the lifestyle?”
“I met Sarina when I worked at the Auditorium Theater in downtown Chicago the summer between my junior and senior years in high school. She worked there, too, and one day I overheard her talking to another girl about this club she’d been trying to sneak into. We became friends, and then once we turned twenty-one, we started going to clubs. We met Zakia and Karly, and then Kane and Eddie.”
Hugh gave her a sideways glance. “Were you ever their sub?”
She shook her head. “No. I’ve never officially been anyone’s sub. I never had sex with Kane or Eddie, but they did top me. I thought all Doms were like them. Truthfully, by the time Zakia was killed, I’d become disillusioned with the whole lifestyle. I didn’t know places existed where things were different. I should have known, simply from watching others, but I was still so young and knew so little. Sean and Maddox were different. I saw that. And there were others as well, but since I mostly hung out with Doms like Kane and Eddie, I thought the ones like Sean and Maddox were the exception, not the rule.”
“Did you date guys outside the lifestyle?” asked Ryder.
“Yes, but once they found out I was in it, they shied away. I felt like I’d never meet anyone normal, you know? I was so lost and confused.”
“It’s no wonder you left it then.”
“Yes. Especially after Zakia was killed.”
“But you never completely left it,” said Hugh. “You’ve always felt that pull.”
“That’s true. But over the years I began reading books and blog posts, so I finally realized that what I’d gone through wasn’t how it was supposed to be. But knowing that and simply walking into a place to try it again are two very different things. I’d lost contact with everyone I once knew, and I didn’t know where to turn. I knew that Maddox and Sean had come home, and from what I’d heard over the years about Racy, it sounded like a more tolerant town than any area of Chicago could ever be. So that, in part, is why I jumped at the chance to work for Claude.”
“We’re fortunate in Racy to have Maddox’s club,” said Ryder. “And that he and Sean patched things up between them. They’re both back to the way they were before they each left Racy.”
“I guess I haven’t really given either of them a chance, have I? I mean to prove they’re not the same men they were ten years ago.”
“Well, let’s be fair,” said Hugh. “They didn’t give you a chance either.”
She nodded several times. “What should I do? How do I make this right?”
“I don’t believe you have to make anything right. I think that burden is on them now. And Sean made a huge step toward that by coming over this morning and showing us the arrest report.” He cut his gaze toward her. “Don’t you agree?”
“Yes. Yes, I do.”
“I have an idea,” said Ryder. “Why don’t we all go to the club on Friday? You could meet some of the other kinksters in town, and you’d have the chance to finally play at a club where no one is abused or harmed. What do you say?”
&nbs
p; “Are you sure Maddox wouldn’t mind?”
Ryder opened his cell phone and tapped a couple of keys. Brynn listened to him make small talk with Maddox, and then he asked if he’d be all right with the three of them coming to the club on Friday to play. Judging by how quickly Ryder thanked him and said they were looking forward to it, Brynn guessed that Maddox hadn’t hesitated or protested. Ryder disconnected the call and grinned again. “All set. He’s thrilled that you want to see his club.”
“This is too easy.”
Both men laughed, and Ryder rubbed her shoulder. “Just relax and enjoy the day. We won’t let you be sad or anxious today, okay?”
“Okay. That’s a deal.”
When they arrived at the resort, they took a walk in the gardens, and Hugh promised Brynn they’d return in June or July when all the flowers were in bloom. “I like the way you believe we’ll still be together in a couple of months.”
He frowned. “Why on earth wouldn’t we be? You’re stuck with us. I hope you realize that.”
She couldn’t stop grinning for at least half an hour after that comment. Once inside the hotel, she had trouble staying still long enough to see everything. It was stunning, and she told the guys that there weren’t many places in Chicago that could rival it. “Who knew? And here in southern Indiana, of all places.”
“It was built in 1902,” said Hugh. “My paternal great-grandfather is loosely related to a cousin of one of the original architects. That’s why we always came here.”
“Hugh’s parents were always interested in finding family associations with famous people.”
Something in Ryder’s tone of voice tugged at her heart. “Did that bother you as a kid?”
“It didn’t bother me, but my parents had plenty to say about it. It bothered them that we were so unimportant and common. There are too many families in Racy who are known for their wealth and prestige, and my parents were bitter about that. They didn’t like me hanging out with Hugh’s family so much.”
Hugh snorted. “Yeah. Only they might have disliked it for very different reasons if they’d known what an abusive asshole my uncle is.”
“The ER doctor?”
He nodded. “One and the same. Ask Cameron some time what it was growing up with parents who made Oliver and Barbara Rose look like June and Ward Cleaver. Did you ever see that movie? The War of the Roses?”
Brynn nodded.
“That’s them, only far worse.”
“My parents didn’t know about any of that,” said Ryder. “They only saw the house on Birch Lane, and the fact that Bitsy ran more charity events than my mother had time to keep track of.”
“I suppose everyone thinks the grass is greener.” Brynn didn’t know what else to say. “Was it difficult for you two to stay friends through all that?”
Hugh shook his head. “No, not at all. We ignored it. That’s not to say we didn’t care that it upset Ryder’s parents, but we didn’t understand all of it, so it was easy to pretend it didn’t exist.”
Brynn thought about what they’d said all through lunch at Xanadu Coffee and Creamery inside the hotel. It made sense in more ways than one. She hadn’t known Sean and Maddox ten years ago as anything other than the image they presented in the clubs, just as they hadn’t known her as any other person than the one she used to be. But each of them were more than that tiny slice of a few years, just as Ryder and Hugh each were more than the image their parents projected to the rest of the world
She glanced at each of them in turn. “It’s wonderful that through all that, you two stayed friends. I miss my friendships with people like Sarina, only because at the time, I felt so close to them. I didn’t see them in other ways back then.”
Ryder gave her a sympathetic look. “That makes sense. And I’m so sorry Zakia was killed.”
“It wasn’t only her. I miss Karly, too. And before I realized Sarina’s true nature, we were very good friends. At least, I thought we were.”
“You were. You just didn’t see her true colors, like you said.”
They ate their wraps in silence in for a few moments, then Hugh gave her a thoughtful look. “Have you considered how difficult it must be for Sean, Julie, and Maddox to know you’re in Racy now, knowing you were once such good friends with Sarina?”
“I’ve just been thinking about all that. And I understand they’re coming at this from an entirely different perspective. But I hope they realize that I had nothing to do with her and Kane kidnapping Julie last summer.”
“I know that, and Ryder knows it, but I think you should consider acknowledging it to Maddox, Sean, and Julie at some point. It might help. I’m not saying they believe you were involved in that, but Julie did mention it. I think if they heard you at least acknowledge it, they might warm up to you.”
She knew he was right. It was just so confusing, though. The Sarina she’d known in high school wasn’t the same person she’d become once Kane had worked on her mind for a couple of years. It was almost impossible for Brynn to see her doing something as stupid as trying to get ransom money from Maddox. She must have sunk even lower once Brynn left the bunch of them behind for good, and that made her sad as well as angry.
Would things have been different if she’d stayed, or would those events have played out regardless? She’d never know. And she also now realized she’d been naïve to imagine that she could simply come to Racy to live and pretend none of that had ever happened. It hadn’t been that long ago. As far as Julie, Maddox, and Sean were concerned, Brynn was still part of the past they’d all rather forget. It was up to her to meet them at least halfway, and help them see that she, too, had changed for the better.
She watched Ryder and Hugh eat their sandwiches and drink their coffee. Just to realize that they cared enough to want to help her do that made her heart flutter again, and brought back all the memories from last night once more. How had she been lucky enough to fall in front of them at Nan’s Place?
After lunch they walked around the rest of the hotel and resort, and by the time they were back on Interstate 65 heading north, Brynn had once again stopped dwelling on Eddie Van Buren. She found Ryder and Hugh so easy to be with, and wondered how she’d ever look at any man again without comparing him to these two. She hoped she wouldn’t have to, but realized that sounded ridiculous. She’d only known them both just over twenty-four hours. And yet, she felt as though she’d lived a lifetime with them already. They put her that much at ease.
They stopped south of Indianapolis at an Olive Garden for dinner because they were still far from Racy, and while they enjoyed the food, the guys agreed that the food at Gino’s Ristoranti was far better. They promised to take Brynn there as soon as possible. She told them she couldn’t wait to taste it and compare it to the Italian restaurants in Chicago she’d loved so much.
When they finally arrived in Racy, they asked Brynn if she needed to stop by her apartment, and she told them only if she was spending the night again so she’d be able to get ready for work in the morning. “And since it’s a bit far to walk, I suppose I should pick up my car as well.”
Hugh’s molten look of desire made her clit throb. “Well then, let’s go and get your car and whatever else you need for the morning. And then we’ll run over to Ryder’s place so he can get his van and clothes for the morning, too. Because if you think either of us can sleep without you next to us, you’re wrong.”
This had to be dream, and yet she knew it was real. Brynn hoped Maddox had been wrong about seeing Eddie in town, because she was going to hang on to these two for as long as possible. She’d never had so much fun, and she was not going to give it up. Not for anyone, especially some creep from her past.
Chapter Eleven
By the time they finished making sure all three would be able to get ready at Hugh’s house in the morning and drive to work, Brynn had begun to wonder if she’d spend another night in her own apartment. That would be fine with her if she didn’t. Hugh pulled her into a tight embrace and
nuzzled her neck, whispering in her ear. “Were you serious about giving us shower sex?”
Shivers ran up and down her spine. “Yes, Sir.”
“I love it when you call me that.”
“I love saying it.” It was true. Being able to call a Dom by a title did something to her inside that nothing else came close to achieving. It was all mixed up with her earliest scenes when she’d had no choice but to use titles. She now realized that hadn’t been right of them to insist she call them “Sir” or “Master” without having first earned the title. But those early memories were difficult to separate from what she now knew was safe, sane, and consensual play, and consequently she was able to get into the right head space more easily if she used a title during play.
She was grateful that Hugh and Ryder didn’t mind. As they walked upstairs to Hugh’s bathroom, Brynn once again wished she’d met these two all those years ago instead of men like Kane and Eddie. But if she had, she wouldn’t have appreciated them as she now did. She wouldn’t have understood the vast differences.
Once upstairs, Hugh turned on the water in his ridiculously large shower, and the guys took turns kissing her and removing her clothing. She loved it when a man undressed her. It was such a submissive thing to do, in her mind anyway. Because Brynn loved to submit. She loved to please a Dom and see that look in his eyes, and hear that tone in his voice when she’d done something he approved of. Her need to please Hugh and Ryder loomed large now, filling up her consciousness.
She asked if she could undress them, dropping first to her knees in front of them. The looks they gave her were nothing short of admiration and awe. Ryder took her hands and lifted her to a standing position. “We would be honored if you would.”
She smiled as she unbuttoned their shirts, alternating from one man to the other, and keeping eye contact as she did so. She removed them, then licked their nipples, loving the soft moans from each that gesture produced. She brushed her hands over their muscles and traced the outlines of their tats, marveling at how sculpted their bodies were.
