Luckily, Bryan already had the charges dropped and he had tried assaulting her. Harper was pretty sure that if she went to the police, they would take her side over his, especially considering the fact that he had a tendency to flip flop.
Her grip tightened on the wheel as she made a left turn. The streets were relatively empty, which wasn’t all that surprising. Besides the one car behind Harper, nobody was really out. It was a Wednesday night, school had already started, and she was getting into a residential area. She cracked her windows just so she could feel the soft sea breeze against her hot skin. Normally, she would have closed her eyes and taken the time to relax, but considering she was driving, she chose to breathe in deeply instead. Already she could feel the positive affect the breeze had on her body: her heartbeat slowed, her muscles eased apart, and her shoulders rolled back.
It didn’t hurt that she was almost home.
Finally, she was done with Bryan.
Her lips started to curve up on their own as she imagined what she would do once she saw Zach. She was almost embarrassed at the excitement she felt, like she was back in high school and she was going on her real first date with the cute senior she’d been eyeing all year. Even though they had already been together, this felt different. It was as though Harper was finally free, and she didn’t want to waste a minute of that freedom.
Sex. She wanted to have sex with Zach, and lots of it. He was something to look at and the guy knew what to do with every inch of her flesh. Somehow, he had memorized every nuance, every flinch, every breath she took when he did something to her body and she craved more of it. She wanted his hands on her hips, his mouth on her nipples, his eyes rolled to the back of his head as she took the length of him in her mouth and slowly bobbed her head up and down. She wanted to hear her name torn from his lips like he couldn’t think of anything else to say except Harper.
Harper bit her lip as she made a soft right into her apartment complex. Her thighs were already moistening with desire and there was a familiar pelvic pulsating that she couldn’t quell at just the thought of Zach inside of her. She wanted to feel him, without protection, without any barriers. It was a fantasy she probably wouldn’t verbalize quite yet, but she wanted it nonetheless.
When she slid her car into her parking spot, a few feet away from her apartment, her fingers shook once more but for an entirely different reason. She gulped, trying to get her throat some moisture as she stepped out of the car with her purse over her shoulder and her keys already in her hand. All she saw was her door. A door that represented good sex and freedom.
She slid her key into the lock and turned. She suddenly realized she didn’t check the lot to see if Zach was still here or if he had taken off. She wouldn’t blame him if he had but she didn’t think he’d do that. Just as she opened the door, a hand grabbed her shoulder. She was so scared, she jumped and let out a little yelp.
“Harper,” a familiar voice said. “It’s just me. It’s Bryan. No need to shout.”
At that moment, Zach was at the door. In one fluid motion, he grabbed Harper by the wrist and tugged her inside so he was blocking her from Bryan’s view. Any thoughts about sex completely vanished from her thoughts. Instead, she clutched at Zach’s shirt, clenching her jaw to keep her teeth from chattering.
Why was he here? Why the fuck had Bryan followed her to her house?
“Will this never end?” she whispered to herself.
“What?”
Harper turned to Bryan. Apparently, she hadn’t said it soft enough. His eyes found hers somehow, even with Zach blocking him from view. He looked at her, genuinely confused, and that was when she felt herself snap. She refused to put up with his bullshit any longer. She refused to allow him to have such control over her emotions. She refused to be afraid of him.
“I said,” she began, her brow furrowed, her voice tight, as her eyes flashed into his, “will this ever end? Will you ever leave me alone? Can’t you just go away?”
Bryan still looked confused. “I don’t understand,” he said. He wasn’t trying to be condescending, he just lacked common sense.
“I don’t want to be with you anymore, Bryan,” she told him. “I don’t want you in my life anymore. I don’t understand why you can’t understand that. I had a restraining order put on you when we first broke up. Don’t you remember that?”
“How could I forget?” Bryan asked. “But you didn’t renew it. I thought… I thought you were finally coming around. That you were ready to give me a second chance.”
“A second chance?” Harper furrowed her brow. Now it was her turn to be confused. “Why would you think I wanted to give you a second chance? I forgot to refile the restraining order. That’s the only reason. I thought you had finally moved on with your life. I didn’t realize you needed a piece of paper to tell you I wanted nothing to do with you.”
“How was I supposed to know that, Harp?” Bryan asked.
Zach took a looming step forward. “Don’t call her that,” he snapped. Bryan didn’t argue.
“You’re clueless, Bryan,” Harper continued. “Sometimes I wonder if you’re pretending to be this dense or if it’s actually genuine. You’re selfish. All you care about is yourself.” She crossed her arms over her chest. “That’s why I broke up with you in the first place. You were a bad boyfriend, even before you put your hands on my throat. You were selfish and critical and nothing I did was ever good enough for you. When I finally kicked you out of my life, I felt like a weight had been lifted. When you came back, I worried I would never get that feeling again. Until I realized that you don’t control me, Bryan. Me and you are over.”
Bryan’s brow was so low, it nearly inhibited his eyes from seeing.
“I shouldn’t have gone out with you,” she continued. As she spoke, she walked around from Zach’s protective posturing so she stood next to Zach rather than behind him. This way, she wasn’t hiding. Not anymore. “You don’t get to control me. You don’t get to manipulate situations where I am forced to bend to your will. You are nothing and nobody to me. You don’t matter. Not to me. And I hope, I truly hope, you find a girl you don’t have to bend to your will in order to get your way. But she isn’t me.”
“Harper,” Bryan began but she cut him off.
“I’m not done,” she said, her nose wrinkling. “You aren’t allowed in my life anymore. I don’t want to see you, hear you. I don’t want to breathe the same air as you do. If you ever come back to my home or harass my boyfriend or even look at people I care about, I will call the cops and report what happened in the car.”
There was a moment of silence, similar to the feeling when a fire sucked all of the oxygen out of a room. Tension grew thicker, like a cloud getting ready to drop an unexpected burst of rain.
Harper felt Zach shift beside her. From the corner of her eye, she noticed him clenching his jaw, trying to control his temper. She had to hand it to the guy; he was really good at controlling his temper. Much better than she was. She could learn a lot from him.
“What happened in the car?” Zach asked, turning his stony stare to Harper. His voice was low, barely above a whisper, and tight. He was reserving judgment before he decided how to react.
Harper kept her eyes on Bryan and perked her brow, challenging him. “Why don’t you tell him, Bryan,” she said, her eyes hard, unflinching. “You didn’t do anything wrong, right? So you should have no problem telling Zach what you did.”
Bryan didn’t even bother opening his mouth. It wouldn’t have mattered anyway. He couldn’t even look at Zach. In all honesty, Harper couldn’t blame him. If she were in his shoes, she wouldn’t be able to look at Zach, either. He looked at her with such fire, such hate, that Harper felt her insides wretch at the sight of it. But it didn’t bother her anymore. She didn’t care what he felt about her.
When it was clear Bryan was going to remain silent, Harper turned her head to look at Zach.
“He insisted that he walk me to my car even though I told him no multipl
e times,” she said. She wasn’t ashamed at what happened. This wasn’t her fault. “He followed me to the car anyway. Before I could even let myself in, he grabbed me and pushed me against the car, trying to kiss me, so I kneed him in the crotch, pushed him away, got in the car, and left. I didn’t realize he had followed me here or else I would have called you and told you.”
Zach was silent for a moment. Then, without hesitation, he reached back and socked Bryan in the face. Bryan was so surprised, his head snapped back and he landed on the pavement of the doorway hard.
“I don’t care who sees me and I don’t care who you tell,” Zach snarled, leaning toward him so he could look into Bryan’s eyes with ease. “If you come here again, I will make you understand what it’s like to feel pain. You think you’re hurt now? You have no idea what I could do to you.”
Harper put a supportive hand on Zach’s back. She wasn’t going to pull him away, nor was she going to tell him what to do. This was Zach’s thing. He could handle it.
“Harper,” Bryan said, his voice strained, controlled.
“You don’t get to talk to her,” Zach snapped, his lips pulled back into a snarl. “You don’t even get to look at her. You lost that right.”
“I’m sorry, Harper,” Bryan continued, not even bothering to respond to Zach. His eyes seemed sincere but Harper would not be fooled by him again.
“I am serious, Bryan,” Harper told him. “I really do hope you find someone who can live up to your expectations.” She turned to Zach and rubbed his back in an imploring way. Without using her words, she wanted Zach to stand up and leave him be. Somehow, he understood her silent command. Bryan was still on his back in front of her apartment when she looked back down at him. “You should go, Bryan. You aren’t wanted here.”
With that, she shut the door, on Bryan and on her past.
Chapter 24
When the door was securely shut and the lock was in place, Zach scooped Harper into his arms and took her into the bedroom. She could feel the ragged breathing, could feel his muscles twitch in response to Bryan, in response to everything that had happened. Harper wished she had some way of making him feel better but her own senses were discombobulated thanks to the conflicting emotions priming her body. She couldn’t even allow herself to think that it was finally done, that she was finally free from Bryan. She had thought that before and he had come back.
Why did he always come back? Why couldn’t he just move on and give somebody else a hard time? What was it about her that he needed to infect with his poison?
She couldn’t bring herself to explore the question, couldn’t get her rational, analytical mind working. Not yet. She was still scared, and she hated being scared more than anything. Fear made you weak and if one was weak, one was vulnerable. Harper never wanted to be vulnerable again.
“Don’t say that,” Zach murmured softly as he eased them onto the bed.
Harper’s eyes snapped open and she craned her neck so she could look at him. She hadn’t realized she had said that out loud.
“Being vulnerable means you trust someone,” he explained. He leaned against the headboard but refused to release Harper. Instead, he cradled her like a bride so their legs were entangled and her head was on his chest. “It means you trust yourself. Don’t let some prick take that ability away from you.”
Harper swallowed and allowed his words to sink in. “You’re right,” she said, her voice raw due to how dry it was.
“I didn’t know,” Zach continued, and to Harper, it sounded more like he was talking to himself rather than to her. She gently squeezed his side just to remind him that she was there with him, if he needed her at all. “I didn’t realize the type of person he was.”
“I didn’t either,” Harper murmured. She placed her head back on his chest, sinking into his arms. She could feel his heart against his chest, reverberating throughout her ear, reassuring her that he was still here, that she was still safe.
What Harper wanted was to feel safe regardless of whether or not Zach was around. She didn’t want to be a fool and assume that just because they cared about each other – just because they loved each other - meant that they were destined to be together for the rest of their lives. She wanted to be okay by herself before and after (hopefully after wouldn’t exist with Zach) him. And, she knew, she would get there. It would take work on her part, but she knew without a doubt, she was strong enough to attain it if she put her mind to it.
“You never really do, though, do you?” she asked, more to herself than to him. She clenched her jaw, keeping her head on his chest and letting the beating of his heart do its best to soothe her.
“You’re mine, Harper,” Zach said after another long moment. He picked his head off of hers and she felt compelled to look up at him, her eyes crisp, taking in the seriousness reflected in the blue irises and the grim line of his lips. “I’ll never let anything happen to you. Do you understand?”
Harper nodded. “It’s not your job to take care of me, Zach,” she told him, as gently as possible while still being firm. “You can protect me and you can be there for me when I need you, but it’s not your job to make me feel anything. That has to come from me. And it will.” She gave him a soft smile. “It should have happened long ago, but I was afraid and I didn’t understand what that fear meant. Now, I do. Now I can learn from this and let it go. I can finally be happy.”
He continued to stare at her. Suffice to say, she felt uncomfortable under the intensity of his stare and she felt herself shifting her weight. Without warning, Zach pressed his lips against hers in a hungry kiss. There was nothing gentle or sweet about it; rather, it was hard and possessive. Almost as though to remind himself that she really was his, that Bryan couldn’t get to her again. Not with him in the picture.
Harper didn’t miss a beat. She met his kiss with an open mouth, allowing him to explore every inch of it. She felt him scrape the top of her mouth, felt him clash with her tongue. Her arms wrapped around his broad shoulders on their own accord, and she clutched his shirt as though she was holding onto it for dear life.
And she was.
It wasn’t long before Harper decided the shirt was in the way, however, and she removed it without hesitation. They only broke their kiss for a moment, but once the shirt was off, Harper leaped into Zach’s arms and claimed his mouth as hers once more.
He caught her with ease, and she instinctively wrapped her legs around his waist. The dress gave him easy access to her and she could feel how hard he was against her already.
They needed to break apart for air and Harper immediately began to kiss his jaw, trailing fire-hot kisses down his neck. She was cognizant enough to not suck on the skin and leave a mark, but she found she considered the idea – which was strange, since she had never been a fan of hickeys before. He groaned at the onslaught her lips gave him as she tasted his skin and pushed her closer to him so she could feel his hardness even more. She sucked in a breath and threw back her head.
She wanted him.
“Take me,” she instructed, her voice breathy. She only saw him through a haze but he never looked more beautiful.
Zach leaned her against the wall and dropped his hands from her waist. She used the back as leverage and squeezed her thighs to keep herself upright as Zach pushed the skirt of her dress higher so he could reach her panties. Without warning, he ripped the underwear in pieces so it fell off of Harper’s body. She gasped and felt her pelvis pulse even harder. She knew she was slick, knew that all Zach had to do would be to tease her lips and his fingertips would be soaked.
“I need to get a condom,” he told her, his voice ragged, rough. Almost animalistic.
Fuck. She didn’t realize how much a voice could affect her body, could cause such sensations and reactions. She had never experienced anything like this before.
“No,” she said before she even realized what she was saying. “Just – take it. Take me. I want to feel you. All of you.”
Zach was so shocke
d, his grip on her loosened and she almost collapsed out of his arms. His eyes, however, darkened. “Are you sure?” he managed to get out.
Harper had no idea how he was still talking. She had no idea why he wasn’t already inside of her, pounding her against the wall so hard she wasn’t going to be able to walk right for the next couple of days.
“Yes,” she insisted. She knew she was whining, knew there was a very immature pout on her face, but she didn’t care. She wanted him. Now. “Please.”
That was all he needed. Zach growled in response, tightening his grip on her waist. He took a moment to get her positioned the right way and shifted his weight so he could unbutton his jeans with one hand and wiggle them down enough so his cock could spring free and he could take her without any obstacles.
There was no time to brace herself as Zach thrust into her hard. She hissed in pain, causing Zach to freeze.
“God, I’m so sorry, Harp,” he said. “Are you okay?”
She nodded. “Give me a minute,” she told him. She could feel him stretch her out, could feel the sharp pain start to dull as she got used to his size.
He felt warm and perfect inside of her, like they were made from the same mold of clay. Like they belonged to each other and inside each other.
“Harp, I need to move,” Zach told her. He was shaking, she realized, trying to keep himself contained, trying to hold onto control. “You have no idea how you feel. So fucking tight.”
“Yeah?” Her eyes rolled back and she sunk against the wall.
“So fucking wet,” he continued. She wasn’t sure he heard her. She didn’t think it mattered. “That’s for me, baby?”
She nodded her head. “You get me so wet,” she told him.
He grunted and, without asking her permission, began to slowly rock back and forth inside of her. She hissed, her eyes rolled in the back of her head. Her neck was starting to ache at the awkward position it was angled in against the wall but she didn’t dare ask him to stop. Not when it felt so damn good.
Exes and Goals: A Slapshot Novel (Slapshot Series Book 1) Page 14
