by A.G. Porter
Those words brought me great dread. Why is it that something I was hoping for could cause me such worry? Shouldn't I be happy Liam was awake? I should. Any normal person would be filled with joy and relief that their loved one was released from a coma. Still, that dream left me with a sense of trepidation.
Liam had stood there in front of me, with my heart in his hands. It was Liam only in body. I could sense the Liam I loved wasn't behind those eyes I knew so well. It was as if something or someone else had taken over.
Mom and I were on the elevator in the hospital. She was giddy, happy Liam was alive and well. She was smiling from ear to ear, but as soon as the doors opened and she spotted Mr. Wu, her smile faltered. He looked at her nervously, wondering if he should say anything.
"Hi, Mr. Wu," I started the conversation for them.
"James, please, Rayna, call me, James," he smiled, hugging me.
"Right, I keep forgetting," I smile.
"Ellie," he said, his voice tight.
"James," she said, not meeting his eyes.
"Not my place, but whatever happened between you?just get over it," I snapped.
"Rayna!" my mother smacked my arm.
"I'm serious, Mom," I rubbed the red mark she left. "After all the crap we've been through this past year we all should've learned that tomorrow isn't promised, right? So, go talk it out and get over it and get married already."
"I want to get married," Mr. Wu said.
"You do?" my mom looked scared out of her mind.
"If I didn't I wouldn't have asked you, Ellie," he reached for her.
"Well, then why did I find your ex at your house?" she pulled back.
"I told you, she just showed up," he tried reassuring her. "I was telling her to leave when you got there, but you didn't give me a fair chance to explain."
"I saw all I needed to see," Mom shook with anger. "You were kissing. He was kissing her, Rayna."
"I wasn't!" he protested, looking at me as if I could corroborate his story. "I swear. She was trying to kiss me. Ellie, please."
"This isn't the time or place," Mom's eyes glistened with tears. "And Rayna, remember that you're my daughter and it's not your place to involve yourself in my personal matters."
Mom stormed off, leaving a torn Mr. Wu and me behind. I looked at him apologetically. I knew he was telling the truth; I sensed it from him the moment he started talking. That night played in my mind as clear as if I had been there myself. The problem was getting my mother to believe him.
"She'll come around," I patted his shoulder. "She loves you and that's why she's so upset."
"I just thought she would trust me," he looked deflated.
What did I say to that? There really wasn't anything to say at this point. Right now, I had to walk down this hall and face Liam. I never thought I would be unnerved by the thought of it. Still, I had to muster up the courage to see if my anxiety about the reunion held any merit.
There was a range of emotions emanating from the room; I could feel them even before I walked in. It's not that I didn't care about the others' feelings, but there was only one person I was concerned about. It was hard to pinpoint him with all the people present. As soon as I saw him he looked up and smiled at me.
It was the brightest of smiles and one I missed seeing for such a long time. Everyone looked over at me, but I wasn't sure what to do. He was surrounded by his family and I was just his on and off again girlfriend. That didn't seem to matter to him because he called to me.
"I dreamed about you," he said, my face flushing.
It wasn't out of embarrassment. I realized then why it had been so hard to figure out where his emotions where. It was because they were gone. No, that wasn't it, there was something there, but it wasn't the same feeling that he'd always had. He had been troubled, scared, hurt, afraid, but there wasn't a void in him. There didn't used to be.
Now that smile didn't reach his eyes. They themselves were void of the mystery that was once Liam. All I saw was nothing and nothing looked back. Liam reached out to me.
"Come here," he asked, all of the eyes in this room followed my every move.
What was I to do? Never in my life did I think the thought of touching Liam would sicken me. Without thinking about it, I walked closer to him. Every step felt as though I was walking toward a black hole, the pressure on my body was making it hard to breathe.
His fingers clasped my hand and electricity surged through my body. Liam didn't react, but I could see it in his eyes. He felt it too. My head was spinning and my stomach felt as though it was in a knot. This wasn't him. This wasn't him! It was his body, but where was the sweet soul I had fallen in love with?
He moved over and pulled me on the hospital bed with him, wrapping his arm around my waist. We sat like that for hours, talking and laughing with his family as if the person sitting here was the Liam they knew. I was rigid next to him, unable to relax. I think he knew it and he was enjoying this little charade he was putting on.
It was well into the night before the nurses came in to remind us all that visiting hours were over. Liam held on to me so everyone left to give us some privacy. As soon as the room was empty I jumped up from the bed and rounded on him.
"Who are you?" I demanded.
"Don't you recognize me?" he looked at me with a mischievous grin. "It's me, Rayna, it's Liam."
"No, no, you're not Liam," I realized I was shaking. "Where is he? So help me God if you've hurt him?"
"You'll what?" he laughed, getting out of bed. "You'll kill me?"
"Are?is The Shadow inside of you?" I tried asking the real Liam.
"Ha!" He busted out laughing as if I just said the funniest thing. "I am Liam. This is me, just a new and improved me."
"What do you mean?" my heart felt like it was about to shatter.
"The Shadow did have a part in this, you're right about that," he walked closer to me. "He opened my eyes while I was in that coma. He showed me I don't have to live the way I was living before. I am free, Rayna. He took all of that?pain?he took it all away."
"Oh God," realization settled in like a knife in my side. "He took your?he took Liam's soul! Didn't he?"
"And I've never felt better." He reached out and touched me cheek, I was crying.
"Don't you touch me!" I shoved him backwards with my Gift.
He flew into the nightstand and crumbled to the floor. I thought he might charge me; the look in his eyes was murderous. Yet, he just smiled cradling his elbow.
"You don't know what you're missing," he laughed. "The freedom in this is amazing! I've never felt more alive, more like myself."
"You're not Liam!" I stood over him. "You're just a shell. I think he's in there somewhere so what I say next isn't meant for you. Liam, I know you can hear me and wherever you are I'm so sorry. I swear, no matter what it takes, I'm going to find you. I'll find you and I'll bring you back home."
"He can't hear you," that shell said to me. "My Master can, however, and he says you look ravishing."
"Tell your Master something for me then," I grabbed Liam by the throat using my Gift.
I lifted him high above my head, holding him tightly. He grabbed at his throat, trying to free himself, his feet kicking.
"Tell him that I'm going to kill him." I slammed the shell back down on the floor, his head smacking the concrete and walked out of the room.
