Olivia knew she shouldn’t let it bother her as much as it did, that she hadn’t known Peter long enough to feel so out of sorts, but there was no point in denying the spark between them, one that both excited and perplexed her. It was much more than the fact that he’d kept her from harm. It was talking with him, the way he smiled, even watching him sleep. It was their kiss…When she’d heard that he’d been hurt in the fire, her fear surprised her. Even though she was engaged to Billy, there was nowhere she wanted to be other than by Peter’s side.
She had to know what it was that she’d done.
“What’s bothering you?” she asked him.
But Peter didn’t respond, which made her a little angry.
“Tell me,” Olivia insisted; when she spoke, she was so worked up that she accidentally squeezed his arm, causing him to pull away in pain. “I’m sorry,” she apologized quickly, shocked by what she’d done. “I just want to know what’s got you so upset.”
Slowly, Peter raised his eyes to hers; the way he looked at her made Olivia feel as if he was accusing her of something. “Not here,” he said, his voice low and weary. “Not now.”
Olivia was about to say more, to argue that that wasn’t good enough, when the argument between Huck and Sylvester interrupted.
“I’ve ’bout had enough of this,” the deputy barked.
Sylvester stood at the bars of his cell, feebly rattling them with what strength he had left, beads of sweat standing out on his pale forehead. “And I’m tellin’ you that I shouldn’t be in this jail no more! I oughta be gettin’ a medal pinned to my chest!”
“Keep it down in here!”
Every head in the room turned toward John. He had a hand cupped over the telephone he was using, staring hard at Sylvester; even as ornery as the old drunk was, he held his tongue, unwilling to anger the sheriff further. No one said another word until John hung up the receiver.
“What’s the good word, boss?” Huck asked.
“The fire’s finally out,” he answered. “By Roy’s count, looks like only two horses were lost.”
Olivia thought Peter would have been happy to hear the good news, but from the frown that creased his face, he reacted as if he hadn’t saved a single one.
“Any idea ’bout what caused it?” the deputy inquired.
“We won’t know for certain until things cool off a bit. Once we get a chance to sift through the ruins, my hunch is we’ll find what’s left of a still. I’ll go out and question Roy in the morning. If we’re lucky, maybe he’ll give it up without much fuss.”
“His old man sure could brew a drink,” Sylvester commented, a faraway look in his bloodshot eyes.
“You been out that way lately?” John asked him.
The old drunk shook his head. “With the way I’ve been treated ’round here, I wouldn’t tell you even if I had,” he huffed.
The sheriff shook his head. “We’ll find out in due time.” He walked over and sat on the edge of the desk opposite Peter. “How’re you feeling?”
“I’ve been worse.”
“Like when Sylvester hit him with his truck,” Huck said with a chuckle.
“I don’t much like the looks of those,” John said, nodding at Peter’s burns. “It’s going to take me a while to tie up all these loose ends. Why don’t I have Huck drive you back to the house so you can get some rest?”
“If it’s all the same, I think I’d rather walk,” Peter replied. “I reckon the fresh air might do me some good.”
“I’ll go with him,” Olivia offered quickly; since they were sure to be alone, she thought it would be the perfect opportunity to finally find out what was bothering him. “I can see that he gets home safe.”
Instead of protesting, Peter said, “All right with me.”
With as quickly as he had answered, Olivia began to wonder if she shouldn’t have been more careful about what she’d asked for.
The sun was setting in the west when Peter and Olivia set off from the police station for home. There was something about the early evening that reminded Peter of springtime back in Germany; it might have been the color of the sky, the way the sun burnt the bottoms of the low clouds, or the pleasant nip in the air. But for as much as things were similar, he was constantly reminded that he was a stranger in a strange land.
While the buildings had been constructed differently and the cars weren’t exactly the same, there was still something about Miller’s Creek that was comforting to Peter. Even the American flag, so strikingly different from the swastika, spoke to him; in it, he saw a people who had come together, sacrificing for the greater good to fight against an evil so that others might be free. When he’d been on the prison train, he had wondered whether Americans truly knew that their country was at war; it hadn’t taken him long to see how wrong he had been. Watching the stars and stripes flutter in the breeze filled him with hope.
But there were other things that filled him with dread.
Peter glanced at the front of the hardware store. There, taped to the inside of the display window, was a poster. It depicted Hitler with a pistol in his hand rearing up over a globe turned toward the United States, a Japanese soldier beside him, holding a bloodstained knife. In large print, it read, WARNING! OUR HOMES ARE IN DANGER NOW! Immediately, Peter thought of Otto and the acts of violence he’d promised against the town and its people. For a while at least, the poster had been telling the truth.
“How do you feel?” Olivia asked shortly after they’d resumed walking.
“I’m fine,” he answered curtly.
“I was worried I might have wrapped your bandages too tight.”
From the quick smile Olivia flashed him Peter understood that she was trying to break the ice between them. She wanted to get him talking so that they could discuss what was bothering him. But regardless of his earlier intentions, he wasn’t yet ready, so he stayed silent.
All of your big talk has gone up in smoke!
Back in the burning barn, all Peter had wanted was a chance to confront Olivia about her engagement, to learn why she’d never mentioned her fiancé, to see if the attraction he’d felt growing between them was real or a figment of his imagination. But now, he struggled just to look at her.
How could he ask Olivia to explain why she’d been keeping secrets from him when almost everything he’d told her was a lie? The answer was that he couldn’t. It would make him a hypocrite. If he wasn’t willing to come clean about his own past, it was hardly fair to expect the same of her.
But then, a sudden, unexpected thought struck him, something that he’d never considered. Maybe Olivia hadn’t told him about her relationship with another man for a reason other than what he’d assumed. Maybe she had avoided talk about her engagement because she had begun to be attracted to him! Sure, Peter had been the one to initiate their kiss, but it was more than that. Thinking back on their time together, there were hints that he was right; it was in the way she looked at him, her eyes lingering a moment longer than might have been considered appropriate, in the way she laughed, her eyes shining brightly, the fact that she had kept her ring hidden from sight. Earlier that afternoon, Peter had stood in the Marstens’ backyard, wondering whether there was a chance for him and Olivia…
Deep in his gut, Peter knew he had to take a chance.
Odds were that he was wrong, that he was going to make a fool out of himself and embarrass Olivia, both at the same time. Just like when he’d walked away from the wrecked train with Otto, he knew that once he’d taken that first step, there would be no going back. Still, it was worth the risk. Silently, he swore a vow. If he was wrong, if Olivia had no romantic feelings for him, if she had no interest in finding where those feelings might take them, he would tell her the truth and the two of them would turn around and march right back to her father’s jail.
Peter took a deep breath.
Walking home, Olivia became more and more frustrated with every step she took. When she and Peter left the jail, she had assumed tha
t he would finally tell her what was bothering him. But so far, he’d hardly said a word. While she had tried reminding herself that he was surely exhausted from all he’d been through, her patience was fast running out. He was keeping something from her, some offense that she’d committed. She’d tried everything she could think of short of throwing a fit to get him to come clean, and that option was under serious consideration. But then, just as she was about to give in to her temper, he spoke.
“There’s something that I want you to know…”
Olivia’s heart began to beat faster. Finally! “What is it?”
He paused. “I don’t have anyone back home.”
“You told me. Both of your parents…”
“That’s not what I’m saying,” Peter explained. Though they were only a couple of blocks from home, he suddenly stopped walking; he turned his face toward the sun, his expression serious. “What I need you to understand is that there isn’t someone special writing me letters or waiting for me to walk back through her door.”
Olivia’s breath caught; he was telling her that he didn’t have a sweetheart. It was as surprising as it was exciting. Looking at the way the sunlight danced across Peter’s face, his blue eyes sparkling, it seemed impossible to her that a man so handsome, so kind and strong, wouldn’t have a woman to share his life with. An unexpected tremor of happiness raced through her.
Was it relief that she was feeling?
Neither of them spoke. Peter watched her intently; she felt as if he was waiting for something. Olivia could guess what it was; he wanted to know if there was a man in her life. But even though she knew she should tell him about Billy, about their engagement, she couldn’t bring herself to do it.
But why not? What am I afraid of?
Finally, it was Peter who spoke. “This afternoon, before the fire, I had lunch with your father,” he said. “He told me that you’re promised to another man.”
Olivia gasped; it felt as if she’d been slapped. Peter had already known; his admission had rendered her speechless.
He reached out and grabbed her left hand and raised it between them. Peter held her engagement ring up to the sun, the gold catching the light. Before, she had lied to cover what that band meant, but now she remained silent. She’d been caught.
“Is it true?” he prodded.
Slowly, Olivia nodded. “It is,” she told him, her voice small.
Peter frowned; his face looked pained. He let go of her hand. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I don’t…I don’t know…” she answered.
“Olivia…” he said.
“I’ve…I’ve been so busy…what with the accident and worrying about whether you would recover…it must have slipped my mind…”
He shook his head. “Agreeing to marry someone isn’t the sort of thing you forget about.”
Shame flushed Olivia’s cheeks. He was right. Her excuse was a hastily constructed lie, and not a very good one. But what was the real reason? Deep down, she knew; it was that she’d been charmed by the handsome stranger who had suddenly appeared one morning on the sidewalk, the man who had allowed himself to be hurt to keep her from harm. Still, there was no way she could tell him that…
Or maybe I can…
Ever since she had accepted Billy’s proposal, all in order to keep from hurting her dearest friend, Olivia had kept the truth locked tightly away. Other than Grace, she had told no one of her reservations. She allowed herself to go along with what others wanted, even if it ran against her own wishes. She had put her growing feelings for Peter to the side, afraid of what would happen were she to acknowledge them, to let them into her heart. But for what? Maybe her sister had been right; if she wasn’t careful, she’d live her whole life worrying about the happiness of others, at the cost of her own.
Maybe if, just once, she was honest, if she told someone how she truly felt, things might be different…
“The man I agreed to marry…Billy…is my best friend,” Olivia began. “He has been since we were kids. He knows everything about me, and I about him, but I’ve never had feelings of love for him,” she admitted. “Not romantic ones, at least.”
Olivia expected Peter to say something, to ask her why, if that was true, she had agreed to marry the man, but he waited for her to continue.
“The morning before you and I met, Billy showed up at the hardware store and said that he had to talk to me about something, that it was urgent,” she explained. “I went with him, worried that something was wrong…but then…he dropped down on one knee and asked me to be his wife…
“I had no idea it was coming. None. He’d never told me he had any feelings for me, not those kinds. No matter how hard I look back, there was nothing that would have clued me in to what he was planning to do. I was so shocked that I swear you could’ve knocked me over with a feather!”
“But you still accepted,” Peter said, breaking his silence.
Olivia nodded. “I did, but there’s a reason why,” she said. “In little more than a month, Billy leaves for the Navy. If he sees fighting…it means that he might not come back…I couldn’t let him leave with a broken heart. If something happened to him…knowing that I’d hurt him so badly…I couldn’t live with that. So, I agreed to become his wife…”
Waiting for Peter’s reaction, Olivia had no regrets about telling him the truth. By admitting to what she’d done, it felt as if a heavy burden had been lifted off her. Still, that didn’t mean she wasn’t nervous about what came next.
“Do you love him?” Peter asked.
“No. Not the way he does me,” Olivia answered.
“Then you need to tell him what you just told me. You have to be honest.”
“I’ve tried,” she said. “I really have. He came by the house just after your accident and I wanted to tell him, to explain how I felt, but…” Olivia paused, remembering the awkward kiss she’d shared with Billy. “I couldn’t find the words…”
“You have to,” Peter said. Slowly, he reached out and again took her hand; this time his touch was tender, exhilarating.
“But it will ruin him.”
“If you don’t, you’ll be the one who suffers,” he replied, looking at her intensely. “It’s too late to change what’s already been done, but there’s still time to make things right. If you’re as good a friend to him as you say, then you owe it to him to tell him the truth, no matter the consequences.”
Olivia knew he was right. Her doubts about marrying Billy had never lessened. If she continued to ignore them, everyone would suffer. No matter how much changing her mind might hurt Billy, regardless of how angry her mother would be, she owed it to them all, herself included, to do what was right.
“Is this why you were so out of sorts?” she asked Peter.
He nodded. “Yes.”
“Tell me why,” Olivia insisted. For a moment, she thought he might be as reluctant to talk as he’d been back at the jail. But she was wrong.
“It bothered me because of the way I feel about you,” he said. “From the first moment I saw you, I knew there was something between us. All this time, watching you as you read at the foot of my bed, waiting for you to come back home from work, I’ve been wanting to ask you something…”
“What is it?” she managed.
“Are you as attracted to me as I am to you?”
Olivia gasped; Peter’s boldness had surprised her. Though he hadn’t said anything that she hadn’t already suspected, the strength of his request had managed to catch her off guard. When Billy had admitted his feelings for her, Olivia’s shock had been mixed with disbelief; immediately, she had wanted to turn him down, to run away. Now, with Peter, she experienced the opposite; knowing that he was interested in her romantically, she wanted to embrace what she was feeling, to embrace the man who had caused those emotions.
“I…I am…” she admitted. “Those feelings you described…I felt them, too…When I first saw you standing there on the sidewalk, I…I can’t explain it
…all I wanted was to know your name…to hear the sound of your voice…”
Without warning, Peter stepped forward and kissed her. As his lips touched hers, one of his hands found her waist and the other wrapped around her side, tickling her ribs. Olivia’s eyes went wide with surprise. Ever since she and Peter had met, something had been building up inside her, yearning for release. With Billy, there was a bond between them that had been built out of years of friendship, but between her and Peter, there was something else, something different, whispers of a passion that had proven to be too intoxicating to resist. It beckoned to her, called for her to match his boldness, to give in. And so, in the last sunlight left to the day, Olivia surrendered to her desire.
Peter did the same.
He pulled her close, their bodies pressing together. Their first kiss had been tentative, cautious, but this time it was much more; within seconds, her mouth opened and she felt his tongue, warm and wet against her own. Olivia shut her eyes, allowing herself to be swept away. Time no longer mattered. It was as if she was floating. Her kiss with Billy beneath the evergreen couldn’t hope to compare; this one made her forget everything around her, made her breath catch and her heart race. It was what she’d waited her whole life for.
She never wanted it to end.
But even as Olivia continued to kiss Peter, as she fell deeper into the passion enveloping them, she knew it would.
Someday soon, there would be consequences for her actions. Eventually, she’d have to come clean. Lives would be forever changed, including her own. Imagining Billy’s reaction was the worst of all; once again, she would hurt him. Still, for the first time in a long time, she was being true to herself.
Take Me Home (9781455552078) Page 14
