by Martin Tays
“Now that's a helluva weasel phrase, there.” Moses said, looking around. “So how’d you hear about it?”
Ami smiled. “It’s the latest scandalous gossip back home. ‘Something must be done’, kind of thing.” She waved around at the group. “All of our parents told us in no uncertain terms to avoid this place at all costs.”
“So...” Moses said, looking back to her.
“So if we hadn’t come here at least once we would probably have exploded.”
“That’s possibly just a little sick, dear.” He glanced sideways at her and waggled his eyebrows. “Gotta be why I hang out with you. And no, I haven’t had real meat in… well, it’s been a long time.”
“And I’ll have you know,” Ami added, “That we waited to order till you got here.”
“Really? That was silly.”
“Nope. That was nice. I’ll show you the difference, sometime.” She grinned, then gestured to the other occupants of the table. “So. Let me introduce you.”
Ami pointed to the first, a thin, handsome blond boy with a mirthful look in his grayish blue eyes. “This is Dougie. Doug’s father is Jeff Brubaker, the actor. He’s going to be going into… well, anything that isn’t show business.”
“Really?” He glanced over at the boy. “Dougie, or Jeff?”
She ignored him. “Next is Fiona Chu.”
Moses nodded at the girl. “And who is Fiona’s Father?”
Ami shrugged. “I have no idea.”
Fiona was a dark haired girl with an intense stare, dressed in remarkably sensible clothing. She looked over at Moses. “Actually, I have no idea, either.”
Surprised, Moses turned and cocked an eyebrow at her. “Um… ‘kay. So, was your mom absent minded or just very, very friendly?”
“Neither. She’s a mathematician.”
“Ah.” He nodded. “That would have been my next guess.”
“No, no, it makes sense. Well, for her, anyway.” Fiona smiled. “You see, she wanted to raise, well, an über-mathmatician. She purchased one time reproductive genome rights to one of the greatest mathematical minds in the last three hundred years.”
“Really? Who?”
“As I said ― no idea.” She shrugged. “The rights came with a strict anonymity clause.”
“I imagine that made Father’s day around your house a bit disconcerting.”
“Mainly, it gave me an interesting little quest.” She grinned a bit crookedly. “I’ve got it narrowed down to four people, I think, but I can’t tell more without a sample of their DNA. I’ll probably leave it at that ― I was more trying for the challenge of the thing, anyway.”
Moses nodded. “One less present to buy at Christmas time, too.”
Fiona shrugged. “Guess so. Never thought of it that way, before.” She paused, then looked over at Moses. “You want to hear the funny part, though?”
“Sure. I like funny.”
She leaned forward conspiratorially. “I hate math.”
“Oh?” Moses snorted. “That’s rich. So in the great ‘nature versus nurture’ debate…”
“I’m the double ‘O’ on the roulette wheel of genetics.” She leaned back and draped an arm around Doug.
Moses turned back toward Ami. “I see, now. All of your friends are crazy, aren’t they?”
“I don’t know what you mean.” She looked over at Doug, who was turning his head sideways while crossing his eyes, and shrugged. “They seem normal to me.”
He leaned over and whispered. “You should probably consider getting out more.”
At that moment the waiter arrived, oversized pcomp in his hand and a professionally supercilious expression on his face. “Now that we are all here — finally ― have we decided what we are having for dinner today?” He glanced over at Moses. “And whether or not we’d like to sit, possibly, while we indulge in it?”
Moses smiled and slowly turned to the waiter. “So… what’s your name, son?”
“Matthews, sir. I am to be your server, today.”
“Well Matthews my server today, I’ve decided that you’re going to be my new best friend.” The waiter blanched.
“Okay, then.” Moses sat and glanced over at Ami. “You know sometimes, they just make it too easy.” He turned back to the waiter. “So, my new best friend, I believe we’ll eat us some critters.”
“Very good, sir.” Matthews keyed his pcomp, and data windows appeared in front of the diners. “Your… critter menus.”
“Excellent!” He waved him away. “Now shoo, Matthews. We’ll call you.” The waiter beat a hasty retreat.
Another of Ami’s friends spoke up. It was another redhead, a large, friendly looking boy that in another time would probably have been pudgy. “I see what you meant, Ami.”
Moses cocked an eyebrow at the boy, a gesture that had taken him years to perfect. “And what did she mean, exactly?”
“She told us that there was no way to describe you.”
Moses glanced back at Ami before replying. “I can think of many ways to describe me. Most of them are unusable in polite company. Presumably that means I can use them here.”
“You’re funny.” This from a tall thin girl with long, brushed back hair of the shade Moses had always heard described as ‘dishwater blond’ who was sitting possessively close to the redheaded boy. She blushed and put her hand over her mouth. “Sorry.”
“Why?” He shrugged. “I am funny. Thank you all for coming, you’ve been a wonderful room. Be sure to tip your waiter, he’s a working stiff. And in Matthews’ case, I mean that literally.” The tall girl giggled.
Ami elbowed him. “Quit playing the crowd.” She pointed to the boy. “Believe it or not, that’s my big Brother, Leo.”
“Brother? Really? Your parents were rich, I take it.”
“Sorta, but mainly Dad just always wanted a big family. It cost a fortune to get the permit for a second kid. That was me, of course… but I cost more because I’m worth more!” It was obviously a running gag; Leo just grinned and shook his head.
“And the ostrich?” He pointed to the tall girl, who was at this point hiding her head behind Leo’s not inconsiderable back.
“That would be Leo’s girlfriend, Sher ― Sherryn Lloyd. I know who her Father is, but you don’t care.” Ami paused, blinked, and continued. “I mean… well, you know what I mean. She’s going to be a botanist.” Sher pulled her head out and grinned.
Moses grinned and wiggled his fingers at her. “Hi. I’m funny.” She blushed and hid her head again. “Well, she’s going to be a hoot to play with.” He pointed at the remaining couple. “So, I guess that just leaves you two.”
The two last people at the table were a striking pair. One was a trim black girl with startlingly bright sky blue eyes. She sat by what had to be the whitest boy Moses had ever seen. His skin was not caucasian, it was white, along with his hair, his clothing, even his irises. The only thing that stood out was his pupils, two small black dots on a blank page. A blank page with a truly heroic nose.
The girl spoke. “I’m Mattie Andersen, and this…”, she gestured to the startlingly monotone boy, “… is No.”
Moses looked at him questioningly. “Your name… your name is No?”
He nodded. “Yes.”
“Yes?”
“No.”
Moses shook his head. “I can’t believe I’m having this conversation.”
Mattie smiled. “No chose his own name.”
“No!”
“Yes.”
“Stop it.” Moses turned back to Ami. “You planned this, didn’t you?”
“No.”
“Don’t you start.”
She smiled that wonderful, wall to wall smile. Moses sighed, beaten. “Okay, then. Your fr
eaks are my freaks.” He glanced around at the crowd. “So… are you all history nuts, too?”
Leo looked around at his friends, then answered for the group. “Sort of. I mean, that’s mainly Ami’s thing, but a lot of it’s rubbed off on us. So tell me…” He leaned forward, staring at Moses intently. “Is the Endeavour really there? In the yard, I mean?”
Moses hesitated. He was saved by ― of all people ― the waiter, who wandered into his field of view. “You!”
Matthews paused, but didn’t quite roll his eyes. Straightening his shoulders, he came over to the table and replied in a resigned tone of voice. “You bellowed then, sir?”
“Yes. Yes, I did.” Moses nodded. “I like bellowing. Would you like for me to bellow again?”
“If at all possible, sir, no. I wouldn’t. Thank you ever so for asking, though.”
“I’m just curious, my server for today.” Moses glanced around. “How can this place afford live waiters, anyway?”
Matthews smiled thinly. “Has sir seen the prices?”
Moses turned back to the menu, floating before his seat. “Holy crap.” He did a little blanching of his own.
The waiter nodded. “Very holy, sir.”
“Jesus.” He did some quick math in his head. It would cost him close to a month’s salary to eat here. Moses hesitated, then turned to Ami, an embarrassed look on his face. “Um, look…”
“It’s not a problem, Moses, really.” She looked at the pained expression on his face, then reached out and grabbed his hand. “Sweetie, I picked the restaurant. That means I get the tab, right?” She searched his face. “You’re… you’re bothered by that, aren’t you? That’s so cute!”
“No, it’s not.”
Across from him, Mattie raised her hand. “I say it is. Anyone else?” There was a general assent by all present, including the waiter. She turned back to Moses. “And the ‘ayes’ have it. It’s cute.”
Despite himself, Moses grinned. “Fine. I’m cute. Yay, me. Now can we please order?” He turned back to the waiter. “Matthews?”
“Of course, sir.” He held up his stylus and pcomp theatrically. “How would you like your crow cooked?”
“Damn.” Moses had to laugh. “One upped by a waiter. One point for you, Matthews.”
“Oh, thank you, sir! Only six more till I can get that bicycle.”
“I’m not talking to him any more.” Moses said, turning back and pointing back over his shoulder with his thumb. “Someone remind me.”
Finally, they managed to place their order. In a surprisingly short time, it arrived. Along with a remarkably good wine from ― of all sources ― hydroponic grapes from an orbital vineyard, Moses’ steak was thick, flavorful and blood rare. Ami had fried chicken, with mashed potatoes and a generous dollop of honest to God butter. Ami’s brother shared a roast with Sher, Doug and Fiona laid into a delicious looking Asian dish laden with pork and Mattie and No between them consumed what looked to be a couple of pounds of raw beef.
Afterwards, dessert ― shared around the table ― was a huge apple cobbler. It was steaming hot and swimming in more butter. Along with coffee imported from Earth it was just about perfect. Moses was starting to feel positively decadent.
During the actual meal the conversation had been desultory ― everyone had been too busy eating ― but afterward, over a final cup of coffee, Leo once again asked. “So, Moses… is it really true about the ship?”
Moses, cornered, sighed. “Okay, yes, she’s there. Mothballed. Has been for years, you know, so she can’t be in that great a shape. You know it’d take a fortune to get her up to speed again, anyway, and…” He looked down at the hopeful expression on Ami’s face. “And, and… oh, hell.”
Ami looked at him, concerned. “What’s wrong?”
He looked away, biting his lip. Finally, he turned back and took her hand. “They’re going to scrap her.” The pain in his voice was a palpable thing.
Ami gasped. “No!”
Moses pointed a quick finger down the table, just as No opened his mouth. “Don’t even think about it.” He turned back to Ami. “Yeah. Orders. I’m… I’m sorry.”
“Wait a minute!” Leo said, angry. “Don’t you run that yard? I mean, aren’t you in charge, now? Can’t you do anything?”
“Yeah, I’m in charge.” Moses shrugged, uncomfortable. “And it doesn’t mean a damn thing. Apparently they’re planning on scrapping the whole Exploratory Corps fleet. I guess they figure they’re just useless junk, now.” He couldn’t look the boy in the eyes.
“That’s wrong.” Moses wasn’t sure which one of them spoke, and it didn’t matter much.
“Yeah, it is.” He toyed with his fork. “And welcome to the real world. Sorry, the real universe.”
Mattie stared at Moses, a grim look on her face. “You’re taking this awfully calmly. Doesn’t it bother you?”
He looked up and caught her eye, then replied in a tired tone of voice. “You honestly think it’d matter if it did?”
“Yeah.” Mattie said flatly. “It would. For starters, you wouldn’t seem near as cynical, or old, or tired.”
“I am cynical. I am old. I am tired. Next question?”
“Okay, then.” She nodded. “My next question is this: you can be quite a bastard, can’t you?”
“Stop it!” Ami’s voice cut between them like a knife. Mattie looked over, surprised at the interruption. “It’s not his fault. It’s not his fault. If you can’t tell it bothers him, too…”
Mattie looked back at Moses, appraisingly. Her face softened a bit. “Yeah. Yeah, I suppose.”
Moses looked at her for a moment, then turned back toward Ami. “There’s…”
“I know.” She cut him off. “There’s nothing you can do.”
“Quit being nice.”
“Well?” She asked, firmly. “Is there?”
“No.” He replied, shaking his head. “No, there isn’t.”
“So, that’s that.” She fumbled with her napkin, her eyes moist.
“Yeah. That’s that.” Moses felt… well, to be honest Moses had no idea what he felt, just that it hurt.
He made a decision. “Let’s go see her.” It popped out of his mouth before he had time to think about it.
“You mean it!?!”
“Sure.” He looked around the table. “All of us. I think the old girl deserves to be adored a bit before she goes to the knackers.”
“Okay, then. That’s fair enough, I suppose.” Mattie said, nodding her head. Around her the rest of Ami’s companions looked at each other, then nodded also. She looked over at Ami. “Ami, dear, you okay?”
“No, but I will be. I suppose.” A ghost of her grin lit her features. “And it’ll be wonderful to see her.”
Moses glanced over at Mattie and nodded, then reached out to awkwardly pat Ami’s hand. “You’re right, you know. It will be wonderful to see her.”
Ami pulled her hand out from under his and wiped her eyes. She then grabbed his hand and smiled. “Thanks.”
Now he knew how Rafe had felt. He turned to look at her, hesitated, and spoke.
“Yeah.” There was nothing else he could say.
“Once upon a time, there was a man named Toffler. He wrote a book filled with dark, dire, urgent warnings of impending catastrophe. He saw all these changes ― great and sweeping changes ― around him, and they filled him with unease. ‘Future Shock’, he called it, warning of the ‘shattering stress and disorientation that we induce in individuals by subjecting them to too much change in too short a time’.
It’s funny how things work out.”
Dale Rhodes, from “The Shape Of Things That Came”
“I was kind of surprised, to be honest, at how little things have changed. Makes sense, now that I think about it,
but still…”
“How does it make sense? What do you mean?”
“I mean that the toilets still flush, and the TV… sorry, the ‘3V’ still has stupid shows about people I don’t care about, and I can still walk through a park and feed squirrels. You’d think that two hundred years would make an incomprehensible world, but I guess when the world is run by people two hundred years old…”
Simon Ho, first revived cryonics patient, during an interview
“When I was born, automobiles were a novelty. I remember my Grandfather taking a wagon into town every Saturday to go shopping. Eight hour round trip, all of it spent staring at the East end of a West bound mule. I’ve churned butter, chopped wood, spun wool and walked through two foot of snow to crap in an uninsulated, unlighted privy.
And I’ve listened to people for the last fifty years tell me about how terrible technology is ― how it dehumanizes, how it isolates, how it ‘strips the dignity from the common man’.
You know what? Fuck ‘em.”
Abby Reed Hodges, from “A Life Worth Remembering”
Chapter 3
“You can judge your age by the amount of pain you feel when you come in contact with a new idea”
John Nuveen
“Rise and shine, sleephead!”
A muffled voice emerged from the hidden recesses of the bed. “Oh, yeah. you’re the ‘perky in the morning’ type. Please stop. It’s unsettling.”
Ami whipped the covers off the recumbent form with a flourish.
“Crap. I knew you were going to do that.” Moses rolled over and sat slowly upright. “It’s sleepyhead, by the way. Slee–pee-head.” He absently rubbed his hands over his face and blinked at the girl. She was standing, fully dressed and faintly vibrating, by the side of the bed.
“So, let me guess.” Moses said dryly. “You’re excited.”
