“Perhaps you did not give this due consideration, but if this wedding is cancelled, Caroline and I will be thrust into scandal. We will be the center of gossip. Speculation will be rampant. People will say the most unkind things about the two of us. But, as is the way of such things, she will bear the brunt of it. Her reputation will be in question if not ruined. Scandal does not particularly concern me. But I suspect it concerns her.” Win narrowed his eye. “I will not permit that.”
“Oh?” Lawrence squirmed in his seat.
“There is only one way to avoid scandal.”
“There is?”
“I have no intention of cancelling yet another wedding.”
“You don’t?” Lawrence said weakly.
“I do not.” Win sighed. “Mr. Royce, let me ask you this. Did you or did you not come here to stop this wedding?”
He nodded. “I did.”
“Because you love her.”
“I do.”
“And can you imagine your life without her in it?”
“No, of course not, I . . .” Lawrence paused. “I do want to marry her, don’t I?”
“So it would appear.”
“There really isn’t any other choice, is there? It’s the only way to keep her with me for the rest of my days.” He thought for a moment. “It doesn’t sound quite as dire as it did a moment ago. Indeed, the more I think about it, the more delightful it sounds.” He grinned. “You know, on occasion one says things in the heat of the moment one truly means. By God, I shall marry Caroline!”
“Excellent.” Win nodded. “Then I suggest you send word to your family. They will want to be here. There are any number of arrangements that need to be made as well. Special licenses and all that.”
Lawrence’s brow furrowed. “What?”
“Mr. Royce, I am beginning to think you are not as intelligent as I had hoped you were.” Win leaned forward. “In order to avoid scandal, the wedding will proceed as scheduled. However, I will not be the groom.”
“Then . . .” Realization dawned on the younger man’s face. “Me?”
Win nodded. “You.”
“Oh.” Lawrence stared for a long moment, a stunned look on his face. At last he smiled. “Oh.”
“One does hope there is more to your repertoire than oh.” Win resisted the urge to once more roll his eyes toward the ceiling. “Now, I suggest you find your bride and deliver her the happy news. I shall arrange for you to speak to Sir William privately. I’ll have to break the news to my parents. Again.” He shuddered. “There are any number of other arrangements that need to be dealt with as well.”
Lawrence nodded mutely.
“Don’t just sit there. There is much to do and only three days to accomplish it all.”
“Yes, sir.” Lawrence jumped to his feet, turned to leave and then turned back. “You have my thanks, my eternal gratitude for this. I shall never forget it.”
“Yes, well, that makes it all worthwhile then.”
Lawrence grinned and started to leave.
“Mr. Royce.”
Lawrence turned back.
“There is one caveat, as it were.” Win rose to his feet, narrowed his eyes and met the young man’s gaze. “I fully intended to spend the rest of my life making Caroline happy. Should I ever hear so much as a whisper, the faintest hint of gossip, a suggestion in passing that she is unhappy for whatever reason, I will not rest until I have destroyed you and perhaps your family as well. And, make no mistake, I have the means to do so. Do you understand?”
Lawrence stared. “You do love her, don’t you?”
“I . . . I am extremely fond of her. Now, do you understand?”
“Completely, sir.” Lawrence straightened his shoulders and nodded. “Let me assure you, you have nothing to fear on that score. I shall cherish her for the gift she is.” He cast Win a giddy sort of grin. “I’m going to marry Caroline.” With that, he nodded and took his leave.
Good Lord. Win sank back into his chair. Was this a disaster narrowly averted or debacle yet to come? There would certainly be gossip, but with the wedding at Fairborough Hall and Win in attendance, it would be more speculative than anything else. That was a matter for later. For now, he had to once again tell his parents he would not be married. Not an easy task, but he had no doubt he had done the right thing.
Still . . . He drummed his fingers absently on the desk. Why did doing the right thing always have to be so bloody difficult?
Three days later ...
At long last there had been a wedding at Fairborough Hall. The bride was almost ethereal in her beauty, glowing with happiness. Win’s throat tightened a bit at the look of her. It was the sentimentality of the day, nothing more than that.
The groom was understandably nervous. But the tremor in his voice at the start of the ceremony had faded and, by the end, it was strong, solid and steadfast. The voice of a man who had at last determined what he wanted, his course in life. The voice of a man in love.
Watching the happy couple, Win tried and failed to ignore a touch of regret. He had never regretted not marrying Felicia or Lucille. He knew now marriage to either one would have been a dreadful mistake. But Caroline, well, Caroline could have been the love of his life if, of course, she hadn’t already loved someone else. No, he couldn’t regret losing Caroline. In truth, he’d never really had her to lose. But when she gazed into her new husband’s eyes, as if he were the moon and the stars and all things wonderful, it was indeed regret that swept through him. Regret that he had yet to find someone who would gaze at him that way.
No, he had not fallen in love with Caroline and his heart had not been shattered.
It had simply cracked a little.
July 1884
Dear Gray,
I hope this letter finds you well. The promise of spring has given way to a dry, hot summer and, in spite of the heat, there is more amusement to be found in London than at Fairborough Hall. Therefore I am residing at the house in Mayfair for the foreseeable future and availing myself of all that London has to offer. While it is enjoyable, I have discovered I am not so easily entertained as I once was. The price of maturity, I suspect.
I was privileged recently to attend the wedding of a treasured friend. One could tell simply by the look in the happy couple’s eyes as they promised their fealty to one another that there was no thought as to the appropriateness of the match but only their feelings for each other. As it should be, I think.
Perhaps it was the romance apparent in their union or my own history, but I have found myself of late in an oddly thoughtful and reflective state. Do try not to be shocked at this revelation; I have been known on occasion to be somewhat deeper than I might appear. No doubt it will not last as I am not usually of a somber nature.
My failure to successfully progress from proposal to the altar has weighed heavily upon me and I find myself examining my past attempts to wed with an unyielding eye. I have come to the realization that I have been looking, for the most part, for the perfect wife, the perfect future countess, a woman I could grow to love. It does now seem that I have been going about this in entirely the wrong manner as certainly the evidence bears out. It strikes me that love might well make all else fall into place. Perhaps the appropriateness of the match is not as important as the needs of the heart. It sounds so obvious, doesn’t it? And yet this simple tenet has escaped me up until now.
I have decided to ignore the more practical aspects of choosing a wife and ignore as well the necessity to wed, the responsibility I bear in relation to position and family and all else. I shall instead heed the advice I recently dispensed and follow where my heart leads. As it has never led me before, indeed as I have never truly known love, it does sound somewhat daunting. One wonders if perhaps I have never experienced that elusive emotion because I am not destined to do so.
But that is a dreadful thought and, as I am by nature an optimistic sort, I prefer not to dwell on that possibility.
Therefore I shall leave m
y future in the hands of fate and trust that one day I will find a woman who will look at me as if I were the moon and the stars and all things wonderful. A look that will come from her very soul to touch mine. A look I will return and treasure for the rest of my days.
Good Lord, Gray, what has happened to me? Have I at last become a true romantic or has there always been a romantic imprisoned within me crying for release? In many ways, I have never had the patience to trust in fate, but my nature has not served me well. So I will bide my time, live my life as best I can and perhaps one day I shall find what I seek. And doesn’t that seem to be the way of it? Only when one ceases to search does one find what has been so elusive.
Ah well, we shall see. . . .
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The Importance of Being Wicked (Millworth Manor) Page 38
