by J. L. Ray
Berry reached over and took Tony’s hand, and Tony smiled at her. After a moment, Berry smiled back, but Tony wondered what was bothering her. She knew that smile. She saw it in her own mirror. It was the one she put on when she had to keep up appearances. As soon as this was over, she was going to have to spend quality time with her sister.
For the second time in one day, Phil and Cal went through the portal to Fairie. This time, they were accompanied by Naamah and the SCAT team members who had come from nearby cities—Richmond, Baltimore, and Norfolk. Jacques and Joe had wanted to come, but Lieutenant Azeem felt that the inclusion of officers from other cities would be good to foster interdepartmental cooperative teams, so he used the visiting Supers.
The portal opened in the woods within half a mile of The Willow, where Naamah, Phil, and Cal and the Mundane team were to rendezvous with one of the Supers from Fairie. A harpy hopped over to them, her vulture’s wings slightly spread to help her in each little leap. A leather biker vest covered her drooping breasts, and she wore a spiked dog collar around her neck. Her hair looked too black to be natural, though it was her own color and not a dye, and the face under the hair was locked into a scowl.
“Which one of you is in charge?” she croaked in a voice that suggested life-long chain-smoker.
Cal held out one large hand. “Good evening! I’m Calvin Kelly, the detective in charge.”
The harpy looked down at his hand and then up at his face, and then back down at his hand. “What do they do, geld you ogres in Mundania?” Her rusted laugh belched out and she put one clawed hand up over her mouth. Cal dropped his hand and glared at her. She added, “Damn. My team is gonna get the shit kicked out of them with this guy around. He’s like the Gomer Pyle of ogres!”
When she finished laughing, he grabbed her around her throat, the spikes in the collar sticking into the meat of his palm. Most Beings, even Supers, would have screamed, but Cal just smiled, letting the harpy see all of his teeth, every single pointy tooth in his mouth. “I happen to love Gomer Pyle. I hope you aren’t insulting him. That would show poor manners.”
The harpy, aware that she had badly miscalculated, croaked out, “Sorry, detective. Didn’t realize.” He shook her just a little and she gulped. “I love that show,” she choked out. “And Gomer. Love that guy. Should have...sorry…”
Cal dropped her and brushed his hands together, leaving blood on both formidable palms. “No harm, no fowl,” and he winked at his own pun. “So, what’s your name?”
“Officer Klau,” she said, giving him a suspicious look after his comment. She couldn’t quite tell if he had meant to insult her with the comment or not. Fowl? Or foul?
Phil stepped up and looked at his watch and then at his immaculate manicure. “Officer Klau, we have business to do. I assume the PTB did not send you to impede that business.”
As she got a good look at the Being addressing her, her greyish, scaly face paled as much as it was able. “Meph...ph...ph...” She couldn’t quite get it out.
He looked up from his perfect nails. “Indeed.” He waited.
“One moment.” She put one claw to her ear and leaned into the charmed ring on one long finger. “All units are in place within The Willow. We are ready to proceed, sir.” She swept a low bow that could have been to the entire group, but everyone knew it was essentially to Mephistopheles. He didn’t answer her, however, instead looking over at Cal.
Cal took his cue. “Right.” He turned back to the Mundane officers. “Mephistopheles, Naamah and I will go in and make contact. As soon as you hear the deal go down, I want you to rush the bar entrances and exits. No one leaves, especially not Sammeal and the Willow.”
“Oh, no sir, he won’t leave his tree,” the harpy said.
“Actually, he will leave it, for a very long time,” Cal replied grimly.
“They are in the bar,” Azeem looked down at the device that had stayed silent for a longer time than anyone had liked. “Very good. Everyone is in place?”
“This should go down very quickly, sir,” said the young centaur in charge of monitoring the actions for the PTB. “Our team leader, Officer Klau is showing your officers the hidden doors in the tree right now. The rest of the Fairie Team is inside.”
“Excellent.” Azeem looked over at Tony, Berry and Tooley. “Not long now.” He smiled.
When Phil, Cal and Naamah walked in, most of the room turned to look at them. In typical dive bar fashion, the patrons checked out newcomers to assess their potential, either as a threat or a promise for financial gain. One look at Cal’s size and most of them turned back around to the mug full of whatever forgetfulness they could afford. Cal’s walk got a little cockier; he couldn’t help it. Sure, Natties got panicked at the sight of him at times back home, but hell, that just made sense. But to have that kind of reaction in Fairie, from Beings with real Power? He gave a little growl of satisfaction and Naamah tugged his arm.
“You’re picking up on some negative magical energy, Cal. Don’t go dark fae on us.”
“Oh, wow.” Cal took a deep breath. “Thank—”
“And don’t finish that phrase here, for your own sake!” she reminded him.
“I never thought good manners could be bad for me,” Cal grumbled as Naamah patted his hand.
Sammeal was on his stool at the bar, but since only three empty mugs sat in front of him, he had apparently held back until their business transaction was done.
“So,” he said as the three walked up to him and he swung around on his stool to face them. “You ready to try the Mundane life, Changeling?” His question, directed at Naamah, was chased by a leer that chilled Cal, given his knowledge of the fate of most of the Changelings the two had smuggled over to Mundania.
“Oh, yes! Yes, I am,” Naamah said, all breathless old lady. She clasped her hands together. “Can I really go tonight?”
Phil tried not to roll his eyes. She always had been the Drama Queen of Hell. He hoped the Willow was not near. She might fool Sammeal, since he was a fool, but the Willow would be no easy mark. Luckily, it was not until then that the hamadryad appeared, coming out from the back room where he had been changing a tap.
He saw the group at the bar and then glanced around the room. He saw a few unfamiliar faces in the room and frowned for a moment, uneasy without realizing why. Sammeal wasn’t the only down-on-his-luck sot who spent evenings at The Willow searching for oblivion. The Willow noted that some of his regulars were missing, but before he could put two and two together, Phil stepped forward and smoothly started the conversation.
Pulling out a bag that clinked satisfyingly, he laid it on the counter. “I believe this is the fee to escort our friend on her trip to visit...relatives.”
The hamadryad snorted. “Relatives, is it?”
Sammeal slapped Phil on the back. “She’s a friend of yours? How close?” He made a lewd gesture and laughed when Naamah made a furious protest. “Not that close, huh?” He turned to Naamah. “What’re you gonna do in Mundania, little lady? Have you got plans with anyone?”
The Willow coughed to get Sammeal’s attention, but the gesture was too subtle for Sammeal, even in his present state of near sobriety.
“Well,” Naamah blushed a little, “I’ve always wanted to be a cook. I am hoping to work in an eating establishment.”
Sammeal winked at the Willow, oblivious to the stink-eye that his lover had turned on him. “I think we could help you with that! I have an interested party looking for someone with a certain amount of good taste.”
The three all caught the double entendre and had to feign ignorance, but at that point, Cal just wanted to punch out Sammeal’s nasty little face.
“All right, then,” The Willow broke into everyone’s thoughts in an effort to wrap things up. He picked up the bag and dumped the coins into his hand, counting. “This looks right for transportation. What about expenses?” He looked at Phil.
“Expenses?”
“My costs?”
Phil
gave his most haughty look. “The cost to get my client across is right there in your hand. What other costs could there be?” The Willow narrowed his eyes, but Phil shrugged, playing up his role as a dealer and trying not to push too hard to get the Willow to incriminate himself. “This is the price you gave us. If it is too little, then why did you not say so in the first place?”
“There are other kinds of expenses. Access to doors, access to guides on the other side, room and board until the client adjusts to the new situation…”
The Willow was careful not to mention Mundania or portals, but he might as well have said it, as Sammeal jumped into the conversation.
“Damn, Phil. Illegal portals don’t just make themselves. We have to pay a pretty penny for access to that shit. You dig me? And then when your client gets there, well she can’t just conjure up a meal. Natties have to have money for that, and it ain’t like Fairie gold. You can’t spin some up if you run out.”
The Willow’s face closed down, his anger so high he was afraid to even speak. He never spoke this openly with potential clients, and usually Sammeal kept his mouth shut, but he seemed hell-bent on impressing his former friend. As he was wondering how much longer he could keep convincing himself to stay with Sammeal, a raspy voice came out of the big ogre’s pocket.
“That’s it, team, go, go, go!”
The ogre pulled out what looked like a gun. “SCIB/PTB! Freeze! You are under arrest!”
Sammeal fell off his stool and landed in an awkward pile. One of the Fairie team had him in magic chains in no time. The Willow, however, had defied all common knowledge of hamadryads and ducked out the door, heading for a passage under his tree that would let him exit far from the nightmare unfolding in his bar. It would hurt him to leave his tree, but he could adapt another to his needs, given time.
But that time wouldn’t come. Three steps down the passage, a massive body pinned him to the dirt under the roots where the passage lay. The Willow concentrated, and some of the roots pulled free and began to walk across the packed earthen floor toward Cal, like skeletal hands wandering along the ground.
Cal couldn’t help it. He’d never seen such a thing and let out a thin, high scream. To his credit, he kept a tight hold on the hamadryad, who was struggling in his grasp but blocked by the sheer mass of Cal’s body in comparison to his own.
The roots suddenly stopped their movement toward Cal and the Willow and grabbed back into the earth.
“What the…?” the Willow gasped.
Phil wandered around in front of him. “My dear boy, I have been around a few hundred millennia more than you. Never doubt that for any trick you have, in Fairie, I have the counter.”
The Willow began to curse in a language so ancient that anyone but a Being as old as Phil would have been hard put to place it. But Phil only smiled and swept a bow worthy of a French courtier. “Merci du complement!”
The Willow spit out an actual curse this time, in terms so they could both understand. It swirled in the room around them, taking physical form as darkling lights before settling on the shoulders of Cal and Phil.
“What the fuck, Phil?” Cal, still holding a now quiescent Willow, looked over at his friend. “Should I be worried?”
Phil shook his head, but he frowned a bit as he held out one hand and watched a final spark from the curse dissipate.
The Willow laughed hollowly. “Be worried. I swear to you that in due time, you will see we were trying to do something good here. You are arresting the wrong Beings, you fools.”
Cal began chaining the hamadryad up as he spoke. “Sure you were. Like I haven’t heard that one a billion times. Am I right?” he said turning to Phil.
“Indeed. I have heard it many times myself, in my professional life. Well, shall we?” He pointed to the way back to the bar.
“With pleasure! I got diapers to change, a Little-Big league game, and a college application to check on.” He winked at Phil. “And you got a new girl who should finally get some time off!”
Phil smiled. “I look forward to that.”
“They have apprehended the culprits and are returning,” came the voice of Midge.
“Excellent!” Azeem replied.
“Shall I patch you through to the PTB?”
“One moment.” He looked over at the three still on the couch, then he nodded toward the door. “Tony, why don’t you three go tell Bogart and Pernella about the living arrangements we’ve made?”
She looked confused. “Shouldn’t I meet Cal at the portal and help escort the prisoners to their cells?”
Azeem shook his head. “The PTB want to keep them in Fairie,” he said grimly.
“Yikes.” Tony shrugged. “Honestly, given what they’ve done and what little I know of Sammeal, living unhappily ever after would seem like poetic justice, except...”
“Except what?” Azeem asked, puzzled.
“They seem like they’re already there,” she said.
Berry grabbed her hand. “Come on, let’s go talk to Bogart and Pernella.”
Tony turned, pleased to hear her sister perk up a bit. “Okay!”
They headed down to Jacques’ suite. As they walked, Tooley out in front of them, Berry chewed her lip, trying to push herself to make her move. It was time to do as she had been told, but dread hung on her limbs, making her move slowly. She felt one of the runes tattooed on her skin, one sitting over her heart, heat to red hot and she stopped, gasping in pain.
“What’s the matter?” Tony turned toward her and grabbed her arms when she leaned forward in an attempt to mitigate her pain.
“I need...one of the washrooms,” she said, realizing that Caridwen was monitoring her movements and had forced her hand. She had to act now.
“Come on, there’s one near here.” Tony put one arm around her sister and looked over at Tooley. “Go on and talk to your folks. I hope we won’t be long.”
He looked back at them for a moment, hesitating. He had felt a flare when Berry gasped, but he had yet to connect it to her. He just knew that he felt uneasy as he watched the two push through the bathroom door.
“Are you okay?” Tony asked her sister as Berry splashed her face with water from the sink.
Berry stood upright slowly, as if her muscles ached. “Not…not really.”
Tony frowned and sighed. “What can I do to help you?”
Berry shook her head, using her sleeve to wipe the water from her face before answering her sister in a world-weary tone. “Why do you want to help me? You don’t even know me.”
“I’m your sister.” Tony smiled a lop-sided smile. “In fact, I’m your big sister by about a minute or so, so it’s my job to look out for you.”
Berry again shook her head, looking down at the sink for a moment before meeting her sister’s eyes in the mirror. “You have all been so kind and helpful,” she said wistfully.
Tony shrugged. “That’s what families do.” She turned and headed through the door, assuming her sister was following her. “We help each other.”
Tony never saw the blow from the sword’s pommel coming. After she landed on the floor, her body holding the swinging door open, her twin stood over her and said sadly, “Oh, sister. I have had a very different family.”
At that moment, the rune began to burn again, and Berry realized that her time out of time was gone. She would go back to her Master, back to her fate, back to being Adele, and drag her poor twin down with her. She shuddered as she sheathed her sword and maneuvered her sister onto her shoulders, following the rune’s bidding to find where Caridwen waited for her.
Tooley walked into the suite that opened out to thirty-foot high ceilings, headroom for full-grown giants. There was a mix of chairs for giants and chairs made to allow Natty-sized folk to climb up high enough to have comfortable conversations with those of giant stature. His mother sat in one of these, looking over at her baby boy proudly as he sorted through the f-light features, explaining all the different options available on the device.
<
br /> Pernella saw Tooley come in. “What’s the word, son? Did they catch the mugs?”
“They did.”
“Thanks to my boy!” She beamed at him.
“I’m certainly glad they think so,” he told her. “Mum, things are looking up for us. They are going to pay me to be a consultant for the short-term. I have an acting job at Folger Shakespeare starting soon, and I applied to work at the Museum of Supernatural History as a guide. I believe I will be able to support us so that we’ll be completely legitimate here in Mundania.”
Pernella’s face got a little sad, but then she cackled. “Legit, huh? Who’d a thunk it?”
Bogey interrupted them. “Where is the Strawberry lady? I wanted to show her my new f-light! I love it, Tooley!”
“I’m so glad, little brother,” Tooley said, and they both smiled at what was now an old joke, since Bogey had surpassed Tooley in height when he was ten years old. Tooley continued, “She wasn’t feeling well, so her twin took her to the ladies room. They’ll be here soon, I hope.”
Bogey jumped out of his seat, causing the room to shake with his landing. He started out the door.
“Where ya goin’, ya big palooka?”
“I’ve never seen a room just for ladies! I bet it’s pretty! I will go help the Strawberry lady!” Bogey got to the doorway and ducked and waddled down the hallway.
“Should I go after him?” Tooley asked his mother.
“Naw, let him…Well, maybe we should both go, huh? Those little dolls ran into a real witch bitch in the ladies earlier tonight. They might need a hand.” Pernella rubbed her hands in glee at the thought of pasting a twinkle toes like Glinda right in the mug.
