by KB Winters
“Okay…”
Finn sipped his lime-infused water. “What about you? Your parents still in Ohio?”
I nodded. “Yeah. Same old, same old, I guess.”
The server came to take our order and menus. She returned a few minutes later with the bottle of wine I’d ordered and poured us each a glass. I watched as Finn took a sip and gave an approving nod. “Not half bad, Lyss.”
I reached for a breadstick and dragged it through the herbed olive oil in a shallow dish beside the bread basket. “So, you obviously know about Rafe and me. What about you? You seeing anyone?”
Finn chuckled at the bold question. “Not currently.”
I hated the relief I felt at his answer.
“Mmm,” I hummed. “You’ll find someone. You should go back to Crumb Cake and talk to that barista. She was interested.”
Finn’s smile remained in place but he didn’t laugh this time. “Lyss, what are you doing?”
I glanced down at my bread poised over the olive oil. “Did I double dip?”
“You know that’s not what I’m talking about.”
I set the bread on the edge of the dish and wiped off my fingers. “You’re right. I’m sorry I asked. This is just a friendly dinner.”
Finn leaned in, forcing me to meet his eyes. “I haven’t been in a relationship in three years.”
Shit. Not since me.
I nodded slowly then waved a hand at him. “It’s none of my business. I shouldn’t have—”
“You can ask me anything you want. I’ll never lie to you. Not again.”
“Again?” My brows furrowed together. “What do you mean again?”
His jaw flexed and a seemingly endless moment stretched on before he dismissed it and shook his head. “Nothing. It’s ancient history, right?”
“Ri-right. It’s all in the past.”
But something gnawed at me long after the conversation shifted to safer topics.
Chapter Fourteen
Finn
It wasn’t fair. Alyssa shouldn’t look so damned sexy and so close to me while remaining so untouchable. She was a walking, talking, breathing reminder of just what a royal jackass I was. Or at least, had been. I wasn’t sure what I was thinking, asking her to dinner, and I sure as hell wasn’t sure what she’d been thinking bringing me to a restaurant where her already beautiful face was highlighted with soft, glowing candlelight. Her golden hair fell around her shoulders and every time she tossed it over her shoulders, I wanted to reach behind her neck and take a fistful of it and bring her mouth to mine.
Between the way she looked, the wine and the amazing dinner. I was wrecked. I had no idea how I was going to manage to get myself onto my bike and race away into the night. Especially since I didn’t know when I’d see her again. Or worse—if I’d ever see her again.
“Whaddaya think? Room for dessert?” she asked, raising those beautiful sapphire eyes to mine.
I want dessert all right, but it wasn’t anything I’d find on that menu.
“You picked dinner, I’ll pick dessert.”
Her eyes flashed with something but she looked away before I could figure it out. It was strange knowing her so well but still feeling at arms’ length like a total stranger. I’d damn near lost it back at her animal shelter, when her fingers had touched mine and that spark raced through me. Her too. I could see it in her eyes and her mumbled excuse about static electricity. She still wanted me, even after everything.
After everything I’d put her through.
It shouldn’t have made me happy. It should have made me feel like a miserable fuck. It wasn’t fair for me to take so much pleasure in knowing that if I waited long enough and played my cards right, I could get her back in my bed.
On top of that, I probably couldn’t give her what she wanted. Or, at least not the things she wanted the most. Her boyfriend might be a nutsack but he had what she wanted. Money, power, influence. I’d never had those things and never would. I was happy working for everything I had. Busting my ass in a garage all day to take home an honest paycheck. That was my life. The one I’d chosen. Alyssa wanted more and hell, she deserved it. Why was I bent on wrecking her chance at that?
The check came and my eyes nearly bugged out of my head at the price listed along the bottom. Alyssa tried to reach for it but I snapped it away from her. “What are you doing?”
“Finn…” She frowned at me. “Come on. Let me get it.”
“No. I asked you to dinner. I’m gonna pick up the tab.”
She looked around and then leaned in. “I wouldn’t have ordered that wine if I’d realized you were going to be a stubborn mule about this.”
“Yeah? Well you should have known I would be. After all, that was always your biggest complaint, wasn’t it?”
She snapped back in her seat, her eyes wide. “Where the hell did that come from?”
I shook my head and dug my wallet out of the pocket of my jeans. “You know, I might not be made of fucking thousand dollar bills like your rich boyfriend, or fiancé, or whatever the hell he is, but that doesn’t mean I can’t afford a nice dinner. Damn, Lyss. Give me more credit than that.”
I slapped my credit card down with the bill and glanced around, hoping to catch our server’s attention. In the space of a minute I’d gone from never wanting to leave, to feeling like the room was running out of oxygen. When I looked back at Alyssa, I found her cold eyes narrowed in my direction. “What?”
“You’re being an ass.”
I laughed, the sound dry and humorless. “Because I want to buy you dinner?”
“No,” she snapped.
I cut my eyes back to the fireplace. “Then why, Lyss? Please tell me.”
I felt her eyes on me but resisted their siren’s call. “Nevermind.”
The server swooped in and took the bill and my card. Alyssa and I remained locked in icy silence until the bill was signed and the card stashed back in my wallet. Only then did I dare to look back at her.
She sipped the last bit of wine from her glass. When she set it down, her eyes lifted back to mine. “And he’s not my fiancé.”
“Why are you with him?”
She sputtered on the wine and coughed. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me. I’ve been trying to figure it out for weeks now. Ever since I found you shivering on that sidewalk. I don’t get it. You’re strong, Lyss. You’ve always been strong. I mean, hell, look at what you’ve accomplished with your life. You’re not even thirty years old, and you have this amazing, philanthropic business where you help people and animals. I mean, you’ve done it. Everything you wanted. You don’t need some rich guy. You’re making it all on your own.”
She was stunned into silence for a moment, her eyebrows high on her forehead. “That’s what you think this is? That I’m some glorified whore?”
“No!” Shit! “That’s not what I said!”
“Rethink it, Finn. It is what you just said. You think I’m with Rafe because of his money.”
I sighed. Where was the fucking rewind button? “That’s not what I think. But I don’t think he treats you right. I’m wondering why you put up with it when you clearly have other options.”
She scoffed. “Like what? You? Last time I checked, you weren’t exactly an expert in the treating me right department either, Finn. Save your sermon for some other hapless soul. I’m fine.”
She pushed up from the table, grabbed her coat, and pushed her chair back underneath.
When it was clear there was nothing I could say to get her to sit back down and finish the bottle of way-too-expensive wine, I stood up and pulled on my own jacket. When I was zipped up, I paused, waiting for her to go first, and after another long, lingering glance, she sped ahead and didn’t look back until we were outside and heading around the block to where she’d parked.
She climbed inside, unlocked the passenger door, and kept her eyes on the parking meter as I got in and buckled up. Within minutes, we were idling outside the shelter.
The lights in the front were off but one other car remained in the lot, a few spaces away from where I’d parked my bike. Alyssa looked at the car left behind and then back at the front of the shelter. A conflicted look pinched her face.
“Is everything okay?” I asked when she looked back at the car again.
She looked over at me, her eyes no longer fired up with irritation. Instead, a dark look of worry had replaced her annoyance and anger. “That’s the vet’s car. I didn’t expect her to still be here…I need to go inside and see what’s going on.”
With a nod, I pushed out of the car and followed as she started for the front doors. “What are you doing?” she asked, turning to look back at me while she placed her key into the lock.
“I’m going with you to make sure everything is all right.”
“Finn…”
“It’s not up for negotiation.”
“Fine.”
She threw the door open and hurried inside. I followed a pace behind as she wound through the retail space, the reception area, and then into the back offices. A long corridor branched off into a T at the end. She went right. The sounds of dogs barking and yelping started as soon as Alyssa pushed into a set of double doors. Kennels lined either side of the hall, probably twenty in total, each one with a dog behind it. Most of them were barking and wagging their tails. Obviously, they all held a high opinion of Alyssa. Under any other circumstances, I imagined she would stop at each door and offer ear scratches and treats to each one in turn. Alyssa had always been a dog person. When she’d told me she ran a website to help dogs and cats get adopted and then opened her own shelter, I wasn’t surprised.
However, Alyssa was a woman on a mission and while she offered the dogs smiles, she hustled through the line of kennels and into another set of double doors. I followed closer behind. It was getting late, we’d been at dinner for close to three hours, and the fact that she was worried had me automatically on edge.
In the final room, we found a blonde woman who appeared to be in her late thirties or early forties. She was bent over a steel medical table and my heart squeezed at the sight of a small dog lying on the table, a fuzzy blanket underneath its tiny body.
“Alyssa? What are you doing here?” the woman asked, looking up through a pair of purple frames. She looked past Alyssa and the question on her face grew when she spotted me. “I told them not to call you. I didn’t want you to worry.”
Alyssa rushed to the table and stroked the dog’s head. Its eyes shifted to her but it didn’t move. I noticed the small pup had bandages wrapped around two of its paws and another one on its tail. Clearly the poor thing had been through some pretty rough shit.
“I was out at dinner,” she said, gesturing over her shoulder. “We got back and I saw your car. What’s going on? Is he going to make it?”
The woman’s expression softened and she pulled off her latex gloves. “I’m afraid there’s not much more I can do but give him fluids and watch his vitals. Surgery isn’t an option. He’s too weak.”
Alyssa nodded, her hard swallow audible.
I moved to her side and placed a hand on her shoulder. “What happened?”
The veterinarian looked up. “We got a call from the local animal control about two dogs in need of care. Their owner was taken away for a list of charges, including animal abuse and child neglect. The two dogs both have suffered quite a lot of abuse. His sister is recovering and will probably be able to go to a foster family while she fully heals. But this little guy had more severe injuries. Some broken ribs and possible internal bleeding in addition to the abrasions on his limbs and tail.”
“What kind of sick monster would hurt a puppy?” I bit out through clenched teeth.
Alyssa answered me, her voice low and solemn, “It happens more than you could even imagine. Even in your worst nightmare.”
I held her tighter and was surprised when she leaned her head against my shoulder, one hand still on the small dog’s head.
All three of us stood there, gathered around the table, staring down at the helpless little guy while his chest rose and fell.
After a couple of hours, Gina, the vet, got up from her place at the chair beside the pup’s makeshift bed. She’d been checking his vitals throughout the night and monitoring his fluid intake. The clock on the wall was creeping up on ten o’clock by the time she declared that he was likely not suffering from internal bleeding based on her vigilant monitoring. Alyssa thanked her and promised to call if anything changed and the woman left.
The door flapped shut behind her and Alyssa let her head drop back against my chest. We’d moved to a pair of chairs that I’d dragged in from the lobby as we sat, keeping vigil at the dog’s bed. Somewhere along the way we’d decided his name should be Peanut. Alyssa never introduced me or explained my presence to Gina, but I’d caught more than a few questionable looks as she’d worked and talked to us throughout the past hours.
“Is this going to cause a problem for you? Me being here?” I finally asked, looking down at her soft cheek. It felt so damn good to hold her again. I didn’t want the moment to end—even though the circumstances that fostered it were tragic—but at the same time, I didn’t want to cause her more harm. The staff was obviously closely knit and I hadn’t missed the way Alyssa had introduced me to her receptionist. I was supposed to just be showing her some car samples. But the lid was already blown if Gina told anyone else that I’d stayed through the night by Alyssa’s side, watching over Peanut, and especially if she mentioned the way Alyssa was currently tucked under my arm.
Maybe she could tell them I was her brother, or cousin if they already knew she was an only child.
“I don’t care about that right now,” she said softly. “Besides, they probably think you’re Rafe.”
I frowned. “Why would they think that?”
“Because he’s only met them once. I don’t even have a picture of us together anywhere in my office.”
“So, on nights like this, when you’re in absolute hell, he wouldn’t be here?”
She snorted. “Not at all. He claims he’s allergic to dogs. That’s why we don’t have one. But that’s not what it is. I’ve seen pictures of him at his family’s house. They had dogs all through his childhood. He just doesn’t like them.”
I turned over the new information. It didn’t sit well. Not at all. What the hell was this guy’s problem? How could he let Alyssa sit through something like this all alone?
I squeezed her shoulders a little tighter.
After a long silence, Alyssa spoke again, “He’s not a bad guy, Finn. I know that’s what you think. He’s just selfish sometimes. But aren’t we all?”
“You don’t owe me an explanation, Lyss. I should never have asked. It’s none of my business.”
She fell silent and I was relieved. I didn’t want to hear her defending him anymore.
We were quiet for a long stretch and at some point, my heavily-lidded eyes fell shut. When I came to, I looked down at saw Alyssa asleep on my shoulder. My heart clenched and twisted. How many times had we fallen asleep like this? On the couch in the middle of a movie? On an airplane? Or on a lazy Saturday, reading together on the couch?
Every memory made me ache.
Alyssa stirred. “Is Peanut okay? What time is it?”
I looked at the pooch first. He was still breathing, his eyes closed, and a soft snore slipped out of him. I hoped wherever he was in dreamland, it was a hell of a lot better than what he’d experienced in life so far. “He’s good,” I told her, resisting the urge to wind my fingers through the strands of hair that had fallen across her face.
She swiped them away and looked up at the clock. “Oh my gosh! It’s almost five o’clock in the morning.”
“What?” I looked up too. She was right. Light was starting to come in through the small slivers of windows on the opposite wall. “Shit. I need to be to work…like…right now.”
I stood up and instantly missed the feel and warmth of Alyssa aga
inst me. I fished blindly in my pockets for my cell. “I’ll be right back. I gotta call Miles.”
I rolled my eyes to myself as I pushed into the hallway. He’s gonna think this is hilarious.
Turned out, I was spared the humiliation and fumbled explanation and got his voicemail. I kept my message short and told him I’d be in around seven. He could heckle me when I got there.
When I pushed back into the medical room, Peanut was no longer on the table. “Where is he?” I asked, panic jumping my voice up an octave.
Alyssa smiled. “I put him in a crate. He fell right back to sleep. Gina will probably be by in an hour or so to follow up but I—” Tears filled her eyes and splashed onto her cheeks. “I think he’s gonna make it.”
I wrapped my arms around her and she slid hers around my waist. My hand went to her hair, my fingertips just barely sinking into the silky strands. “I’m so glad, Lyss. What you do here…for these animals…it’s amazing.”
“Thank you for staying,” she said against my chest.
Neither of us made a move for at least a minute. When she finally pulled away, she brushed her hair back and tucked it behind her ears. “I better get home and grab a shower.”
My body ached at the thought, desperately wishing I could join her.
I smiled and raked a hand through my own bed head. “Yeah, I gotta get back too.”
We looked in on Peanut once more, reassuring ourselves that he was still dreaming peacefully, and then she walked me to the front doors. To my surprise, she followed me out to my bike. I straddled the bike before I was tempted to pull her back into my arms and never let go. I reached around for my helmet. “So, charcoal, right?”
Alyssa laughed and gave me a nod. “Charcoal.”
“All right. Good. Glad we got that sorted out.”
Alyssa smiled. “Me too.”
The edges of her smile crinkled and faded, turning wistful and almost sad.
“Lyss?”
She lifted her eyes to mine. “Can I ask you something?”
“Shoot.”
“You said something…at dinner…” She paused, as though gathering her strength. “You said you wouldn’t lie to me again. What was the thing you lied about before?”
