Resolved, I took another sip of coffee. It wasn’t too late. I would make sure of it.
“What do you think, Daddy?”
Harper was at the door to my office, smiling at me. I smiled back. My own little fairy princess, complete with wings and wand. She did a little dance into the room, waving her wand above her head.
I clapped my hands. “Beautiful,” I told her. “The most beautiful fairy princess I have ever seen.”
Harper ran to me, jumping into my arms. I hugged her tightly.
“Daddy!”
Poppy wasn’t far behind, walking into the room. She made a perfect Alice, with pale blue dress, white apron and patent black shoes. A black bow in her golden hair completed her costume. She looked at me, smiling hesitantly.
“Well?” she asked, twirling around so that I could see the stiff white petticoat underneath her dress. “Do you like it, Daddy?”
I put Harper down, walking up to her. “You are going to entrance the Mad Hatter, wherever he is,” I said to her gravely. Her smile widened. She proffered her cheek for a kiss, which I supplied.
“So, where’s Captain Jack?” I asked them both. “Is he ready yet?”
“Almost,” said Harper, rolling her eyes. “Bianca is helping him. She said he had to have eyeliner on, just like Captain Jack does in the movie. Max said that only girls wear eyeliner!”
“But that’s not true, is it Daddy?” piped up Poppy. “I’ve seen Billy wear it as well, before he has a concert.” She nodded her head. “Sometimes Mummy would draw it on him.”
I froze, but only for a moment. It really was alright, I thought to myself, in wonder. I could listen to talk about Jo and Billy and not be consumed with anger, anymore. I had turned a corner. It felt good; liberating, even. I was free of it. And I knew the reason why: Bianca.
She walked into the room, now, followed by my son. Or Captain Jack Sparrow, to be precise. The costume was perfect. She had even made a dreadlock wig from black wool; had twisted them so perfectly you would never know they weren’t real. Was there any end to the talents of the woman?
“Thank you,” I said to her. It wasn’t enough, for everything that she had done for these children.
She blushed, refusing to meet my eye. “That’s okay,” she answered, looking at the kids.
I wanted to reach out, take her hand. Tell the kids that they should leave us. But I knew it wasn’t the time or the place. Bianca was just about to take them trick or treating around the station. The time would come, I told myself. Tonight.
I thought about my costume for the party. George had approached me more than a week ago, saying he would take care of it. I didn’t have any idea what he had got for me, only that it was in my room, hanging in a clothing bag. I hadn’t even peeked. Well, I had been a bit distracted lately.
“Have a great time,” I said to the kids, giving each of them a kiss.
“Kiss Bianca too Daddy,” said Poppy, laughing.
I looked at Bianca. She blushed, again, quickly looking at me before lowering her eyes. “No, no,” she said, shaking her head. “Come on, we should get moving! Halloween is starting!”
The kids rallied, gathering up their treat bags. I watched them as they left the room. She turned quickly, looking at me. I could see, then, how hurt she was.
I hated myself, in that moment. I didn’t want to be the man who let her down. How had it come to this?
The sun was setting when I finally closed my laptop for the day. I should start getting ready for this party. All afternoon I had heard people arriving, the temporary staff who I had hired for the evening. The party was due to kick off at seven.
I walked into my bedroom, unzipping the clothing bag hanging in my wardrobe. I frowned, staring at it. I had anticipated a mummy, or Count Dracula. Maybe even Marc Antony, again. But, no. George had selected a Victorian gentleman’s costume: long pants, blazer, top hat. Interesting.
There was a note attached. I pulled it off, opening it.
Mr. Connelly, it read. I hope you like my choice. Our theme for the party is going to be Victorian Gothic, so I thought you might like to be on trend with it! I thought it would be a good match for Bianca’s Victorian lady costume, as well.
Of course. The dress she had found in the attic, which had belonged to my great-great-grandmother, Florence. Bianca was very taken with her story. I had seen her reaction at the old house ruins, and the old graveyard. Bianca was one of those people who were very sensitive to the mood and history of a place. I loved that she was so responsive to Birrimba.
I smiled as I tore the plastic film off the costume. I could definitely play the gentleman lover to a lady. Especially if that lady was Bianca.
Bianca
I watched the children running around, weaving between the legs of the temporary staff hired for the evening. They were a bit over excited; we had just returned from trick or treating around the station. They had, of course, hauled away an extreme amount of candy. They would be suffering from sugar hangovers tomorrow, no doubt.
I looked with satisfaction around the homestead. George had sent away for decorations for the Victorian Gothic theme, and the staff had set up while I had been out with the kids. Lots of black and purple lace had been hung like cobwebs everywhere, and we had utilized some dusty old antiques lying in the attic. Spooky candleholders, swathed in black lace, were scattered around the place.
But the piece de resistance was the Gothic centerpiece on the dining table: a huge candelabra, complete with purple candles, and a chillingly realistic black raven perched atop it. Very Edgar Allen Poe. The combination of the decorations and the age of the homestead almost had me convinced that we had stepped into a haunted house.
Canapes and party snacks were being prepared, and a crate load of champagne was being unloaded. A hundred champagne flutes were being polished. It was almost ready.
But it would have to go on without me. As soon as it was safe to do so, and after I had settled the children to bed, I was planning to sneak away. Even though the atmosphere was infectious, I just didn’t have the heart for it, anymore. Not after what had happened between Zane and me.
“Bianca!” George hurried into the room, looking harassed. “Go and get your costume on, while you have a moment.”
“I’m not sure, George,” I said. “Is it really necessary for me to do it?”
He looked at me as if I had suddenly gone mad. “What are you talking about?” he barked. “It’s because of you that this party has happened. You have to dress up!” He started to walk away, then turned back. “Oh, and don’t forget the makeup. Everything has to be perfect!” He scurried away.
I sighed. I could just ignore him, of course, but I knew George. He would find me and harangue me until I had complied. I might as well get it over with.
I could hear many laughing voices drifting from the main part of the house as I finished my makeup. The party was already in full swing.
I didn’t recognize myself when I looked in the mirror. Florence’s white lace gown clung to me perfectly, but I wriggled in discomfort. Probably something to do with the white corset I was wearing underneath. Although the dress had fitted, the shape of it hadn’t been quite right. And then it had dawned on me that they had worn corsets to get the shape of their gowns back in Victorian times. Luckily, I had been able to order one over the internet, and it had arrived in time.
I laughed to myself as I thought of Mrs. Price hooking me into it. Well, I couldn’t do it myself; it had ties at the back. And did I imagine it, or had Mrs. Price taken a certain measure of satisfaction in lacing the thing as tight as it would go?
The ghostly white makeup and black eyeshadow completed the look of a Gothic steampunk lady, as did my upswept hairdo and Florence’s cameo brooch, pinned at the neck. Even though my heart wasn’t in it anymore, I still sighed with satisfaction. It was perfect for Halloween.
And it was also now or never. I took a deep breath, opened the bedroom door, and headed out to the party.
Zane was in the crowd, mingling. I saw him before he saw me.
The costume that George had ordered looked amazing on him. If I didn’t know any better, I would have sworn he was a Victorian gentleman, in his top hat and old suit. I caught my breath, thinking of his hands on me, the mind-blowing sensations that he had evoked in me.
Then he saw me. His eyes widened; I could tell he appreciated the costume. But at that moment, someone came up and claimed his attention, and he looked away. After that, I managed to merge into the crowd, making sure that I always moved away if he got too close. It wasn’t that hard amongst so many people, all wanting to speak to him.
Then the scavenger hunt was underway. Groups had been formed, and the ghostly lanterns given out, along with clues. George had made sure that the paths were lit as well, but only just enough; he wanted the darkness for atmosphere.
As people set out, laughing, with their lanterns held high, I took the opportunity. The kids needed to go to bed, even though they had begged me to let them participate. On this point, however, Zane had been insistent. The kids had their own entertainment, and this was for the adults. He didn’t want the little girls suffering from nightmares.
As I helped them remove their costumes, still chatting excitedly thanks to all that sugar, I couldn’t help feeling sad. I was going to be leaving them, very soon. It made my heart ache. I had grown to love them in the short time I had been here, despite the teething problems I had with them. I would miss them.
“Thank you for Halloween,” whispered Harper sleepily, as I tucked her up in bed. “It was the best ever, Bianca.” She reached out and stroked my hand. I had to blink away tears.
Poppy kissed me goodnight, and even Max gave me thumbs up sign as I turned out his bedroom light. With a heavy heart, I left them.
I returned to my bedroom. The house had suddenly grown silent; everyone was out hunting. I could see the light from various lanterns bobbing in the darkness outside, and shrieks as a group discovered some spooky display or felt ghostly hands upon them. George had dressed up a few staff as ghosts and mummies, crouching in the darkness at various spots.
I sighed. Should I just undress, and go to bed? But the night beckoned to me. I would be leaving, soon. I sat on the side of my bed, thinking.
Then, suddenly, I knew what I was going to do. It would be a fitting good bye to Birrimba, and a very apt gesture on Halloween. The night when the spirits of the past walked the earth.
I went back into the kitchen, finding a little jam jar, a small candle, and a box of matches. Luckily there were a few lanterns leftover. I grabbed one, turning it on.
Then I set out into the darkness, joining the sea of lights bobbing in the night.
I passed groups of vampires, werewolves and other creatures as I made my solitary journey, holding the lantern high. I remembered the way. Despite myself, I felt a small fission of fear.
At last. The old graveyard. George had made sure there were a few lights around, and some Halloween decorations for added ambience. He needn’t have bothered; the deserted graveyard was scary enough in the dark. I could hear people in the distance, but no one disturbed me. They were elsewhere, at least for the moment.
I set myself down at the old headstone, holding my lantern high so I could read it, again. Florence and Violet, sleeping together for eternity in the red earth. What a tragic story; I felt again the sadness of Florence’s words in the journal, and pictured the faces of her and her daughter in the old photograph.
I set the lantern down, then lit the candle, putting it into the jam jar so that it would be protected against the wind. Then I placed it down. It flickered slowly in the night. I felt an overwhelming sadness; not just for these long-gone people, but for myself. For the fact that I had given my heart away to this forlorn place, and I would leave it here, battered and broken.
“Bianca.”
I almost jumped out of my skin, rearing around so quickly I almost lost my balance. It was Zane. He reached out and steadied me, kneeling beside me.
“What…are you doing here?” I could barely talk, he had frightened me so much.
“I followed you.” His voice was soft, carrying on the breeze. “When I couldn’t find you, I went back to the house. I saw you leave by yourself.”
“Shouldn’t you be with your guests?” I turned away, towards the headstone. Tears had formed in my eyes.
“They’ll wait.” He reached out and took my hand. A shiver went through me, at his touch. “The hunt is over, anyway. They are all heading back to the house. This is more important.”
“What is?” I cursed my voice. It was trembling. Keep it together, I told myself fiercely.
“You.” He stood up, pulling me to my feet. I could just see his face in the light of the lantern. He reached out and stroked my face. I choked back a sob.
“Bianca, I’m so sorry,” he whispered. “I’m sorry I haven’t reached out to you, since that night. It was just…”
“You don’t need to explain.” I turned my face away. “It’s obvious, Zane. You are still in love with your ex-wife. What happened between us…well, it was just sex, wasn’t it? I was stupid.” The tears that had been threatening finally fell. “I’m leaving Birrimba, heading back to the States. It’s just too difficult.”
“No!” He grabbed me, pulling me towards him. “That’s not going to happen! I won’t let you go!”
I wrestled in his arms, trying to pull away. “I can’t stay here! Not like this!”
“Like what?” he hissed. His face was so close to mine, I could feel his breath. “Like the nanny? I don’t want you here as the nanny, Bianca. I want you.” He feverishly started kissing my face, as he pulled me closer. “I’m not in love with Jo anymore. I was just finding it hard to let go. It’s you I’m head over heels in love with.”
“You love me?” I gasped. I closed my eyes, not believing what I was hearing.
“I love you,” he whispered. His lips came down on mine, warm and sweet. “My God, how could I not? You are the most amazing woman that I have ever met. You have settled my children back home, which is no mean feat. All the effort you have made, for this night. And you have shown me that you love it, here. You have connected with the place, in a way that Jo never did. Birrimba is my heart, Bianca. It runs in my blood.”
“I know,” I whispered. “I can feel that connection. Oh, Zane, is it possible?” I looked up at him, his eyes glimmering in the soft lamp light. “I’m in love with you, too.”
He let out a whoop, echoing in the night air. He picked me up, twirling me around.
“Let’s go back to the house,” he said. “I need to get rid of the guests, so I can take you to bed.” His eyes narrowed as they looked at me. “You look so beautiful in that dress, I’ve barely been able to take my eyes off you all night.” My body warmed at his words.
He took my hand, then reached for the lantern. I looked back at the candle, flickering on the grave.
I heard the last car leave, snaking its way down the dirt track. All was silent. There would be a lot to clean up tomorrow, but it could wait.
My bedroom door opened. It was him. I shivered.
“Everybody gone.” He crept into my room. Then he stood looking at me, as if his eyes drinking me in. “What a night.” His voice wavered with tiredness.
“Do you need to sleep?” I whispered. He looked at me as if I was crazy.
“Sleep is the last thing on my mind,” he growled. “Stand up and turn around.”
I stood up. I had managed to get the lace dress off, but the corset was another matter. I hadn’t wanted to ask Mrs. Price to unhook me.
He let out a slow whistle as he looked at me. “That is the sexiest thing I have ever seen,” he said. “A Victorian corset. Wow.” He shook his head, as if he couldn’t believe it.
He put his hands around my waist, feeling the stiff boning. “A six-inch waist?” he murmured, pulling me to him. Then he spun me around, slowly unlacing me. I felt the corset give away, and then
his hands snaked around, finding my breasts, kneading them.
“My lady,” he whispered, in my ear. I saw our reflection in the full-length mirror. “May I make love to you?”
I nodded, weakly, my head falling back against him. He had found my nipples, and was pulling them into peaks. Desire tore through me, as I felt his hardness against me.
Suddenly, he pulled my panties down, and bent me over. He entered me, swiftly. I gasped again at the pleasure of having him inside me. He was watching us in the mirror, as well. I could see him behind me, his eyes closed as he gently thrust. I backed against him, lost in the moment. I could feel it building, and could see by his face that it was close for him, too. Watching ourselves was an added thrill.
He gripped me, straining. My climax shuddered through me, unspooling like a ribbon of light. I couldn’t help it. I groaned, softly. He shouted as he reached his peak, gripping me tighter still.
We collapsed onto the bed, breathing heavily. At that moment, the first rays of the new day suddenly started streaming through the curtains. He turned to me, stroking my face.
“Bianca,” he whispered. “Don’t ever leave me. Will you be my wife?”
“Yes,” I whispered back, joyfully. “Oh, yes!”
We lay in each other’s arms, softly stroking each other. Birds started twittering; I could hear Harper’s bedroom door open and close, as she went to the bathroom. Another day was starting, at Birrimba.
And I would be here, to greet it. With Zane, and the children. Just as I planned to be here, forever. I couldn’t think of a place I would rather be, than here with this man and this family.
I looked over at the old lace dress, hanging on the back of a chair. Thank you, I silently said. It felt like the spirit of Florence had guided Zane to me. Maybe she wanted one of her family to live happily ever after, content in this beautiful house in the endless, open desert.
Daddy's Christmas Date: A Single Dad Romance Page 22
