by Nicole Smith
“So how did your night go?” I asked as I ate my cereal the next morning. I tried not to sound mad but the hurt still lingered. I wanted to go with him so badly.
“It didn’t exactly go as I planned but I’m working on it. I have a Seeker from the south end joining up with me to help,” he explained nonchalantly.
“What Seeker from the south end?” I asked as I looked up at him, feeling a little left out.
“No one you have met. I’m sure you will though, don’t worry.”
“Have you hunted with this Seeker before?” I persisted, I couldn’t let this go.
“Yes, we have collaborated on a few occasions,” he answered as he looked away. My curiosity rose by his avoidance of my eyes as he spoke.
“Is this Seeker male or female?”
“Does it matter?”
“Of course it does,” I said as I tried to control my anger. I stood and rinsed my bowl, not looking at him. I slammed the dishwasher door shut and turned to leave the kitchen.
“Natalie, please don’t read anything into this. You know I love you. I want you to finish this school business quickly. Then we can go out together. Please trust me that it’s just business. I assure you I am not interested in anyone else,” he tried to explain himself, but I felt furious now. I didn’t like his lame ass excuse about school. I’ve been given the light. I possessed the power to Seek. Hell I’m even stronger than most Seekers that have been doing this for years. Why did he have a problem with me hunting? I couldn’t even look at him right now.
“Natalie, please don’t be angry with me,” he begged. I ignored his plea. I shut my mouth and gave him the silent treatment because if I spoke now I knew I would go off. I grabbed my books and walked out the door. Hayden knew better then to follow me. The last thing he would want is an altercation in public.
As I walked to school I tried to take my mind off of Hayden out in the dark with some other girl, hunting together. I must think of something else or I’ll go mad. Carlos came to mind. I couldn’t wait to tell Beth that Carlos is coming to see me.
“What else did Carlos teach you Natalie?” Beth asked me as I laid out my lunch on the table outside the cafeteria. I looked around before I spoke making sure it was safe to talk to her. The only other person out here was a boy with his headphones on sitting on the far side of the lunch area.
“What do you mean?” I questioned her interest.
“I have been talking with a few of the others. They told me about the Seekers. They also told me they have a new one that can see us better than any of the others. Are you the new Seeker Natalie?” I couldn’t lie to her. She already knew the answer anyway.
“Yes, I guess I am the newest. You don’t have to worry about me Beth, you know that right?” I whispered, not wanting to attract any attention.
“I know,” she whispered unnecessarily, as she looked away from me.
“Did they tell you that we only go after the poltergeists, the ones that are causing trouble and frightening the living?” I asked. Trying to figure out why she felt so worried.
“No, actually the ones I talked to seem to think that your captures were random,” she explained as she looked back to me. She stared at me like she didn’t know me anymore. I smiled and tried to remain calm, controlling my voice.
“That is ridiculous Beth. Do you have any idea how many spirits I see on a daily basis? Do you really think I would just randomly choose anyone? If a spirit is really happy to stay here, peacefully living in their afterlife then I would never interfere? Beth, I am not a monster. I’ve made many friendships with spirits in my life, you are not my first. To me all of you are real. I hope you can understand this?” I needed her to understand how I felt and how I lived surrounded by ghosts every day. Everywhere I go I see ghosts. No wonder she seemed afraid of me this morning. She didn’t really want to go yet, she wasn’t ready to move on. She needed to stay a little longer and I did not intend on being the one that ends her life permanently.
Hayden continued to go out at the same time for the next two nights. He even asked me to join him if I would just talk to him again. I refused and I moved back in to the den. Hayden didn’t always show his emotions with me, but he couldn’t hide his anger over this. I gave him his space and he eventually cooled off. Late last night he begged me to forgive him.
“I’ll think about it,” I replied smugly. He has to learn to treat me with the respect I now know I deserve. I will demonstrate my power tomorrow night with Carlos. Saturday afternoon I called him from the den.
“Carlos, are you here yet?” I asked excitedly.
“Wow, are you ever eager,” he joked.
“When are you coming to get me or where should I meet you?” I asked.
“How about you call me tonight, after your dinner? I haven’t even landed yet. I know Hayden is heading out for a job so give me a call once he leaves. I don’t want him to know I’m taking you out, okay?”
“I’m not worried about ‘what Hayden thinks’ anymore,” I replied dryly.
“Don’t be too hard on him Nat, he has your best interest in mind,” he sighed.
“How can you be on his side? You don’t even know what is going on.” I felt hurt by Carlos siding with Hayden so quickly.
“I’ll talk to you about it later. I have to go,” he said quickly, then hung up.
I spent the day studying for my exams. I confidently closed my books, feeling good about going into them next week. I decided to go out for some air to try and clear my head of Hayden and Carlos. I must remain calm. When I returned from my walk I noticed Hayden sitting on the sofa, he seemed to be waiting for me.
“Hey,” I said as I walked in and took off my coat. I hated myself for feeling so angry towards him. I love him. I guess I felt hurt and jealous of this Seeker he spent so much time with instead of me. I wanted Hayden all to myself again, and I wanted to be his partner like we talked about. I couldn’t understand why he changed his mind.
“Will you talk to me Natalie?” he asked seriously.
“Sure, I guess, yes,” I stammered. I could feel the tension in the air and I felt slightly afraid by the tone of his voice.
“I know Carlos is on his way here,” he simply stated. I felt defensive immediately. I have done nothing wrong by wanting to spend time with a friend, although Carlos is more than just a friend. He not only trained me and gave me the confidence I needed during my transition after being given the light, he was there for me when I lost my family.
“So?” I said, trying to hide my surprise that he knew. I didn’t think Carlos wanted him to know he was coming here.
“I really don’t want you to go out at night,” he said, finally looking up at me. I rolled my eyes, trying to think of why he would say such a thing.
“That’s nice, but I think I can make that decision for myself, thank you, I’m a big girl now,” I said through gritted teeth. I tried really hard not to scream at him.
“I really didn’t want to tell you this Natalie, but in order to try and salvage our relationship, which I do cherish, I have no choice. I just hope you can somehow forgive me. I love you with all my heart Natalie, you have to believe that before I say anything more,” he said as he looked away from me again. I have never seen Hayden speak so unsteady. I wanted to hold him so much. I am so foolishly stubborn. I felt my pride getting the best of me but I needed him to explain himself before I could touch him.
“Tell me what?” I said, trying to sound as composed as possible. He held his hand out for me and then gestured for me to sit down on the couch beside him. I didn’t refuse. I closed my eyes as I slipped my hand in his. I didn’t realize how much I missed him until I felt his touch. I wanted so much to feel his arms wrapped around me. I sighed as I sat down beside him. I shook my head quickly to rid my mind of thoughts of losing him. I held back my tears as he sat so close beside me.
“I am hunting a spirit that I really didn’t want you to know about. If Clive and I could have been faster, you wouldn’t be s
o mad at me right now and I wouldn’t be sitting here wishing I didn’t have to say this,” his chest heaved heavily as he looked down. This is serious. Hayden is actually afraid of what he has to tell me.
“What happened, Hayden? Who are you hunting?” I asked trying to sound calm. This is going to be very personal, I thought.
“I couldn’t catch him Natalie. I tried, I really did. Clive even expressed his shock by this ghost’s unbelievable escape. We underestimated him. He is smarter, even in death then we thought. I am so sorry,” Hayden explained with tears in his eyes as he looked over at me. I sat motionless, waiting for him to continue.
“Your father is still out there,” he whispered. I stood abruptly. Shock over came me. Of all the things he could have told me, I would never have guessed this. I tried to breath. I attempted to ask how this could possibly have happened.
“What do you mean he is still out there?” I gasped. I tried to put the pieces back together from when I heard my family died.
“I thought you were in Argentina when I planned their funerals?” I asked.
“I did go to Argentina but I delivered someone else,” I really didn’t like the way he said this. I don’t think I can handle anything else but I knew he had more to tell me. I sat back down, my knees grew weak. I couldn’t stand anymore. I looked over at him, waiting for him to continue.
“Who did you deliver?” I whispered. He held my hands tightly in his. I couldn’t control my shaking.
“I’m so sorry Natalie. I didn’t know until I landed in Argentina that I didn’t have him. Somehow he managed to trick me. It has never happened before. He must have been playing on my emotions. He knew I worried about you tremendously and I guess I lost my focus. I am so sorry I have let you down. I have been trying for these last few weeks to catch him, but I realized I couldn’t do it alone so I called for help,” he explained, still squeezing my hands.
“Who did you bring to Argentina?” I felt the tears rolling down my cheeks because I knew the answer. I just needed to hear it from him.
“Anne,” he simply stated, holding my hands tighter still. I stared at my hands in his, not feeling anything anymore. I didn’t know she stayed behind. I didn’t feel her presence in the house. I thought she moved on.
“Did she seem okay?” I needed to know if she was afraid. I wished I could have been there for her.
“She appeared completely calm and so peaceful as soon as she realized we were helping her go. She loved you. She loved her entire family. She felt everyone’s pain and she made it her own but she wanted to go,” he said this like he knew her. I walked to the den slowly. I needed to be alone. I lied down on the bed and felt the pain of losing her all over again. My throat hurt and my stomach ached.
When Carlos called later in the day I told him I wouldn’t be able to see him. I’ll have to explain it to him later. I spent most of the night awake. Whenever I closed my eyes I could see my father’s angry and tormented face looking up at me from the basement stairs. Why didn’t Hayden tell me this sooner? Maybe I could have helped. I can catch him, I thought. He is not as smart as Hayden seems to think he is. As I finally drifted into sleep in the early morning hours, I felt a sense of calm wash over me. I am going to be the one to deliver my father to his final resting place.
I awoke later that morning and wrapped myself in Hayden’s robe. When I realized he left early I curled up in the window seat in his bedroom and looked out upon the busy city below. How did all of this happen? I have lost my family, as volatile as it had been, they were still my family. I have lost Adam. I just hoped I wouldn’t lose Hayden. I could never be too confident. Why have I been so mean to him? He has been out there every night looking for my father and when he comes home I give him the cold shoulder. I have to make it up to him. I looked up at the painting of the woman hanging on the wall and I realized I wanted to be her again. I have to grow up. I have to be strong. I can’t let little things get to me anymore. I have a job to do and I need Hayden in my life.
When Hayden returned, he didn’t seem any happier. I could tell he failed again last night. I walked over to him quickly.
“Good Morning Hayden!” I said as I wrapped my arms around his waist. He tilted his head slightly and slanted his eyes.
“Good Morning Natalie. Are you feeling alright?” he asked cautiously as he placed his hands gently on my shoulders.
“I’m okay. I’m feeling better today. Hayden, I want to say I’m sorry for being so difficult. I appreciate your help so much, I really do. Will you forgive me?” I asked, staring into his eyes. He smiled and pulled me closer to him. I felt my body tremble as he slowly kissed me, it has been too long since I felt this.
After I dressed and ate Hayden grabbed his keys and stared at me with a grin on his face. I glanced at him as I put the dishes away, wondering why he looked at me like that.
“Are you going somewhere?” I asked curiously. I walked over to him and slid my hands slowly up from his waist to his chest and rested them on his shoulders. I didn’t want him to leave me today.
“We are going somewhere darling. I am going to teach you to drive today like I promised. I know you’ll need to know how to soon enough,” he smiled as held me close.
“Really, you’re going to let me drive your convertible? No-way!” I shrieked. This seemed too good to be true. I needed a distraction and this would do perfectly.
“Of course I am going to let you drive my car. I am taking you out of town for a few hours of lessons. We’ll start slow, we’ll go at you’re pace. It’ll be fun. What do you think? Are you ready for this?” he asked, already aware of my excitement.
“Wow, I’m speechless. Thank you, I think I’m ready to drive. Just let me grab my coat.” I raced into the den and reached for my coat in the closet. Out of the corner of my eye I caught a glimpse of something fall to the floor. An old photo, black and white with frayed edges lay on the rug. I haven’t seen a picture like this in a long time. Years ago I used to love looking at my grandmothers old photos hanging on her walls. I couldn’t help but take a closer look at this one.
A young man and woman appeared to be walking hand in hand down an old city street. As I looked at the man, his dark hair and the set of his shoulders, I realized the man in the picture is Hayden. This must have been taken a few years before he met Clive, because he only seemed slightly younger than he is now. I was curious about the woman now. I stared at the girl in the photo, intrigued by how much she resembled the woman in the painting hanging in Hayden’s bedroom. As I looked closer at her a shiver went through me as it occurred to me that the woman in the photo looked a lot like me.
I quickly placed the photo down on the desk. Hayden will have to talk t me about this later. I tried to shake off the eerie feeling as I looked back at it again. It must just be a coincidence, I thought. ‘I’m going driving now’, I smiled as I raced out to Hayden waiting patiently by the door. He reached for my hand as he led me out.
Once we reached the outskirts of town, Hayden gave the wheel over to me. We were on a back road and not a single car had driven by in the last ten minutes as Hayden gave me a quick lesson on steering and speed. I remembered driving my dad’s truck around our long driveway in the country and on back roads years ago, during one of his crazy highs.
I slowly crept on to the road and lightly pressed down on the gas. Hayden helped me for a few minutes, until I felt comfortable with the steering wheel. He let me know if I veered too far over to the right or left of the road. I trembled with excitement. His car steered so smoothly and it’s so much easier than my father’s old truck.
It turned out to be an amazing day. We stopped at a beachfront restaurant for dinner once I felt I needed a break from the road. We held hands as we walked along the beach. We were a new couple again, without any secrets or painful memories haunting us. I had to get closer to him as we walked. I felt desperate to touch him. When he smiled at me I melted, just like I used too. I couldn’t look away from his eyes when he spoke to me.
My enchantment with him consumed me. I would not let him out of my site, now or ever, I told myself as I held his hand. I believe Hayden felt the need to be close to me as well. He always reached for me if I strayed too far ahead. I felt protected and safe with him.
We didn’t talk about the job that would be awaiting us even though it lingered on the edges of our thoughts. The sun began to set as Hayden drove back into the city. The humid air and warm breezes reminded me that a storm would be arriving shortly. I opened my eyes and looked down the streets as we drove back home. I wouldn’t be able to go out seeking alone until my brother and my father were captured. It frightened me to imagine what would happen if they met up with each other, in this world they both happened to be trapped in. Anxiety overcame me, my heart started to beat faster and my hands began to shake. My senses seemed to be on high alert. I could hear conversations as we drove past people on the street. I heard sirens from the other side of the city. I heard the flurry of spirits as we sped past them. They were out there waiting for me.
CHAPTER TWO
Carlos left a number of messages on my cell phone. Obviously he’s worried about me. I kind of blew him off, which I feel horrible about. While Hayden checked his own messages and made calls I quietly called Carlos from the den.
“Natalie? Where have you been all day? Are you okay?” he asked before I could even say hello.
“I’m fine Carlos, I’m sorry I didn’t answer your calls, I haven’t been in town. I’ve recently heard some unsettling news. I think Hayden has to go out again tonight. Can we meet somewhere close to my place?” I asked.
“Yes, that would be good. I need to talk to you too. I have more ‘unsettling’ news for you,” he said cautiously.
“Great, just what I need. I’ll call you back soon.” I hung up and stretched out on the floor. Looking up at the ceiling, I wondered if I’m still safe here in this apartment. Hayden had explained his defenses but I still didn’t know how to use them. I needed to know more about that. As I tried to remember exactly what he had said, he appeared, standing over me. He held his hands out to me, to help me up. I smiled and placed my hands in his. He kissed me as I stood in front of him.
