by Harlow Grace
Deep breath in.
Long slow breath out.
And then another.
Until the ache subsided.
I’ll deal with reality later.
At that moment all I wanted was to bask in the glory of what had happened between us. The magic that weaved around us. The spark that ignited my soul.
I couldn’t deny the magnetic pull Grayson had on me any longer. I wanted to give in to those feelings and just experience the magic for a little longer.
Hell no, I’m lying. I want the magic forever.
I closed my eyes and replayed everything in my mind. From the moment I’d come down the stairs, to the last kiss before I crept out of Grayson’s bed.
A slow grin spread across my face as it dawned on me that Grayson had been jealous all along. And there I was thinking all he was doing was being a protective big brother.
My hand caressed down my ribs, recalling the feel of his touch against my skin. Touching my pussy, I remembered the feel of Grayson’s mouth. God, I loved those wicked lips and tongue giving me pleasure. It was sexy as hell that he liked tasting me too.
It felt tender but oh so good between my legs. I’d never imagined sex would be this amazing or that I’d want it so much.
Lost in my thoughts, still touching myself everywhere Grayson had been, my head jerked up in surprise and my jaw dropped slightly open when the door creaked open.
“Good morning, Layla. Why are you up so early and what are you smiling at?” Taylor stuck her head around the door. “Um . . . can I come in?”
“A knock would’ve been nice. You can’t just barge in here.”
Taylor raised a brow.
“And why not? It’s not like you have a guy in here, right?” She pushed the door open and walked in anyway.
“Close the door,” I said, half irritated.
“Sorry! It’s just that I can’t wait to hear what happened last night. Seth looked so damn hot. Did you have a good time? Did you get to have sex?” Her words flew out of her mouth, as if she couldn’t talk fast enough. This girl has no filter.
“Jeez, young lady, you sure ask a lot of questions.”
Her eyes narrowed as she studied my face.
“What?” I asked as her stare became more intense.
“There’s something different about you this morning. I bet you had sex!”
“Well I sure as hell didn’t.” I heard as Sloane came through the still open door.
“What the hell is this? Did I miss the memo about the meeting in my bathroom?” I squealed. “I think I’ll have to lock my door in future.”
Sloane stood with her hands on her hips. She didn’t look all that happy.
“What’s wrong, Hon?” I asked. Sloane was one of those people who always had a smile on her face. Something serious must have happened for her to be here this early with a frown marring her beautiful face.
Sloane turned to my stepsister who had planted her ass on the stool and was watching us as if she were at the movies.
“Um, Taylor, honey, would you mind fetching us a coffee each? Pretty please?”
“And miss all the juicy parts? You’re kidding, right?” She smirked. Missy was getting way too big for her sixteen year old shoes.
“Well unless you want to hear details about your brother—” Sloane said dryly.
Oh shit. She wanted to talk about Grayson. How the hell was I going to pull that off after what happened last night?
“Oh hell no. Spare me that conversation. Two coffees coming up. And I’ll take my time, okay?” She pushed to her feet and left the bathroom, this time closing the door behind her.
Sloane came to sit on the edge of the bath and ran her fingers absentmindedly through the frothy bubbles.
“Layla, I don’t understand what I did wrong. I really thought Grayson was in to me, but it turns out he isn’t.”
I sucked in a breath.
“What makes you say that?”
“Just the way he acted. Don’t get me wrong, he was the perfect gentleman—most of the time. Come to think of it, he disappeared for a while and left me alone without any explanation. I wonder where he went?” The frown between her perfectly sculptured brows deepened as she tapped her finger to her chin.
I didn’t say anything. If I kept quiet long enough, she’d soon fill the silence.
“I asked him if there was someone else. His actions would make sense if he were in love with someone already.”
My eyes widened.
“What did he say?”
I didn’t know if I wanted to hear her answer. What if it wasn’t what I wanted to hear? But what if it was? I was screwed either way. I sat up in the bath, waiting for her reply.
“Funny thing . . . he never gave me a real answer. Said it wasn’t me and that any man would be a fool not to like me. Then he said he’d prove it by taking me to dinner sometime this week.”
“Oh. Right.” My stomach performed a sickly flip.
“What I can’t understand though is that I practically threw myself at him and he didn’t even notice or make a move. I was so open about what I wanted, but he didn’t try anything.”
“He didn’t?” My voice was small and scratchy because my throat had tightened so much.
“I’m sorry, Hon, I know this must be awkward for you talking about your stepbrother like this, but I need advice on how to get him to fuck me.” She looked like she wanted to cry, I felt horrible. “I think I’m falling for him, Layla. I’ve never wanted a man so badly.”
Usually men fell over themselves, practically tripping over their dicks to get to my best friend. I could understand that this was a strange experience for her. Just as strange as me suddenly having two guys chasing after me. Okay, maybe not quite chasing, but still . . .
“You want advice from a girl who last had a boyfriend in grade school? What the hell do I know about these things? I’m probably the last person who can help, Hon.” Ain’t that the truth.
“Thing is, I’m sure he really likes me. He kissed me a few times and it was amazing. I want him, Layla, and you’ve got to help me get him.”
Sweet Jesus. I was in so much trouble. How could I deny my best friend? What would she say if she knew what happened between me and the man she wanted. She’d hardly believe that he’d want me over her.
We were both out of our depths and Grayson was slap bang in the middle of this dilemma.
5: Layla
“Can I stay for breakfast? I’m hoping to see Grayson. Will you help me with him?” Sloane asked, sitting on my bed as I begun to get dressed.
I pulled a t-shirt over my head and combed my wet hair. Thank goodness I got rid of that fancy hairdo when I washed it. I was back to the old me—with highlights- plain Jane who didn’t stand a damn chance against a beautiful woman like Sloane.
“Hon, you’ll get more information from Cosmo or Google than me. I don’t have a clue how to get a guy.” I couldn’t help the bitterness that snuck into my voice.
Grayson was drunk last night. I was now pretty sure that was the only reason he wanted me. That, and the fact we were both half naked to start with. Shame washed over me as I recalled how easily I fell for his charms.
How could I have thought for even a moment that something could come from having sex with my stepbrother? Of course it couldn’t. I had to face reality: I was the ugly stepsister.
“Oh my God, here I’ve been rambling on about my situation and I haven’t even asked you how you went with your guy. What happened with Seth? Did you get your cherry popped?”
How to answer that without telling lies?
I lowered my eyes. “Seth didn’t quite work out. Turns out I was only a bet to him to prove his manliness.”
“Oh God, Hon, I’m so sorry. I’ve never really liked Seth . . . or his military older brother. That one just gives me the creeps with the way he fucks me with his eyes. Hawke Matthews is so intense, he scares the shit out of me.” She shuddered to prove her point. “What you need, is a man li
ke Grayson. Someone who is considerate and kind . . . and fucking hot. Hmmm, I wonder where we can find you someone like him.”
I nearly choked on the coffee Taylor had brought me.
I didn’t want a man like Grayson. I wanted Grayson.
But what I wanted and what I’d get were two vastly different things.
Feeling sick to the stomach, I told Sloane, “You go down to breakfast. Mum and Taylor will be happy to have you. And maybe you’ll see Grayson too.” I rubbed my temples. “I still have a hangover. I’m going to crawl back into bed and sleep some more, okay?”
“Okay. If you don’t mind. Hope you feel better soon. Wish me luck!” She called out in a singsong tone as she walked out of my room.
“Luck,” I mumbled, feigning enthusiasm.
Luckily I’d changed the sheets and made a fresh bed before everyone barged in on me this morning. I lifted the bedding and slid between the cool sheets. My body was on fire as shame burned through me. How could I ever face Grayson again? How could I look at him without giving away how much I wanted him?
I was so screwed.
Just as I was about to drift off to sleep, I heard voices and footsteps walking toward my door. A soft knock and Grayson’s concerned voice made my stomach lurch. Then I heard my mother’s voice and Sloane’s. Why couldn’t they just leave me the fuck alone so I could drown in sorrows and have my own little pity party?
“Honey, are you okay?” Mum sounded truly concerned as she lay her hand on my forehead. She always did that when I wasn’t feeling well. “You feel feverish. Lucky for you Grayson is home. Let our doctor take a good look at you, sweetie.”
I groaned and buried my face in the pillow. Really?
Feet shuffled closer to the bed and then a cool hand lay on my shoulder.
Refusing to look up at Grayson, I mumbled into the pillow. “Go away. I’m okay. I just have a damn hangover and I need some sleep.”
“Ouch, she bites this morning,” Taylor said. Trust her to have some smartass comment.
“Lala. Look at me,” Grayson commanded.
Shit. I was powerless to disobey him when he called me Lala.
I turned my head to the side, mostly because I needed to breathe, but refused to open my eyes. I couldn’t look at him after everything Sloane had said. The aroma that was uniquely Grayson snaked its way to my consciousness. God, he smelled good. Just as good as he tasted.
Jesus. Why am I thinking these wicked thoughts?
I squeezed my eyes shut and wished them all away. How had I gone from sheer ecstasy to having this dull ache in my heart in just over sixty minutes?
“I told you she wasn’t feeling well,” Sloane said. “Let’s leave her be and get back to breakfast. I’ll draw the curtains so she can get some sleep.”
“That’s a good idea,” Grayson said. “The darkness will help for her headache.”
My heart felt as heavy as a rock. He wanted to leave so he could be with Sloane. I got the message loud and clear. She was beautiful—he’d said so himself. Of course he wanted to be with her now she was here.
I hate feeling like this.
“Tell you what, you guys go down and finish breakfast. I’ll stay here with Layla and give her something to make her better.”
“But, Grayson—” Sloane sounded pretty unhappy with his reply.
He laid a hand on my forehead for a few seconds, then pushed my damp hair behind my ear.
“Go now, ladies. My patient will be better in no time, I promise.” The tone of his voice was even and measured, not inviting arguments.
As soon as everyone left and the door closed, he leaned over and kissed my brow. I couldn’t believe how that one simple act made me feel so much better so quickly, but I kept my eyes shut. I was never good at hiding my feelings and if Grayson looked into my eyes he’d see just how messed up I was.
Without a word, he left the room and instantly I missed his closeness.
God, how was I going to ever get over him and act normal?
The door squeaked again and I felt his presence return to the room, restoring some calm inside me.
Click.
He locked the door?
“I brought two painkillers and a glass of water. Sit up, Layla.” He was using his Doctor voice now. It was strong and commanding, laced with tenderness and a dollop of caring.
My heart did a little flip-flop. I did as I was told and took the tablets and water without directly looking at him and yet from my peripheral vision I could see how damn hot he looked in his workout gear. His biceps bulged as he crossed his arms over his fine chest.
I swallowed the tablets and drank all the water. I was so damn thirsty.
“Good girl.”
He took the empty glass from my hand, his fingers grazing mine. Every touch was like magic and torture rolled into one.
“What’s going on, Lala? Are you mad at me about what happened?”
Say what?
I found my voice, but still avoided his gaze despite feeling his eyes burn into me. My cheeks grew hotter.
“N . . . no, of course not.”
He let out a long sigh, as if he’d been holding his breath. He sat at the edge of the bed and took my hand in his. I squeezed my eyes shut and savored his touch. With his thumb he rubbed small circles on my wrist, sending an electric current through my body.
“I’m so sorry if what happened last night was not what you wanted. I can never give it back to you and that’s just killing me.”
The caring in his voice caught me off guard. I never expected this. My eyes flew open to witness a pained expression on his handsome face. I’d never seen Grayson so distraught.
Oh God, was he regretting having sex with me now he was sober?
Of course he was.
Because like most males he’d be worried I’d want something more that he wasn’t willing to give, like a relationship when all he’d wanted was to blow his load and forget about it.
This was awkward as hell.
Nausea swept over me. I bowed my head and closed my eyes again. Pain throbbed at my temples and tears prickled behind my eyelids. I wish he wouldn’t be so damn nice, but then again this was Grayson. On some level he did care about me, I’d always known that, just not in the way I wanted him to. It would’ve been so much easier if he was just a jerk about it and didn’t apologize. His kindness was making my heart hurt even more.
He took my chin between his fingers and raised my face. His voice cracked as he spoke.
“Open your eyes, Lala, so I can see you.”
I couldn’t. My lids felt impossibly heavy, like theystuck together with superglue.
“Please, baby,” he whispered.
Oh My God. Baby? Why would he still call me that?
The tears I’d been fighting so hard spilled from my under my closed eyelids and rolled down my cheeks.
“Fuck. What have I done to you? Please forgive me, Layla.” Both hands cupped my cheeks. I pressed my face into his touch, relishing every second. His thumbs brushed over my cheeks, wiping the tears away. My throat burned with unspoken words.
“I wish I could undo last night so badly you have no idea. I’m so fucking sorry.”
He regretted last night.
I want to die.
I wanted to tell him how much I loved him. I wanted to beg him to love me back. I wanted him to hold me and never let go.
Instead I sat there leaning against the headboard, my head pounding and my heart splintering into a million pieces.
Grayson pulled the covers back and I felt his weight as he settled onto the bed.
“Don’t say anything, just lie down. I’m going to hold you until you fall asleep, okay?”
I nodded and slid down until my head hit the pillow. Grayson settled down and spooned me, holding me close to his chest. An avalanche of tears feel from my eyes being this close yet so far away from him.
He stroked my arm and kissed my hair.
“Shhhh, Lala, shhhh. Be a good girl and go to s
leep.”
What was in those tablets he gave me? Drowsiness overtook me and my body sank heavily into the mattress. I clutched his hand and laced my fingers through his, pressing them to my heart. A few minutes later my breathing evened out and I drifted into a deep sleep.
6: Layla
When I woke what felt like hours later, I felt so much better. The headache had lifted and I could think clearly again. Grayson must have left as soon as I’d fallen asleep, but I could still smell him on my pillow and sheets. I inhaled deeply, savoring it so I could recall it at will later when I knew I’d need it.
I slipped out of bed and pulled my messy hair into a ponytail. The princess from last night was well and truly gone and I was back to practical old me. Yet I felt different. Older.
Making my way down the stairs, my stomach rumbled. The clock in the hallway chimed three times. No wonder I was starving, I’d slept the best part of the day away.
Noticing Milton’s car in the driveway through the large windows, I wondered if he was getting ready for a business trip. Usually he only came home during the day if he had to pack to fly off somewhere. Quite often he had to jet off to one of his branches to sort out the crisis of the day.
If Milton was going away, I wanted to at least say goodbye. Instead of heading for the kitchen, I made a left turn to his study. As I drew closer, I heard his voice booming down the hallway.
“For the love of God, I can’t understand why you want to be a doctor when you can be my right hand man. Who would turn down the opportunity to run a billion dollar business?”
As I drew closer, Grayson’s voice traveled toward me, sounding uncharacteristically loud.
“Uh . . . that would be me.”
Oh shit. Not this argument again. I didn’t know if there would ever be a happy solution to their ongoing feud. It was hard for me to hear because I really cared for my stepdad, but I completely understood where Grayson was coming from. If I’d been forced into a career I loathed I’d be equally as resentful.
I froze just outside the doorway. It felt rude to just walk in on them and I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but I couldn’t help overhearing their conversation. Grayson had already told me parts of the arguments, but they usually didn’t make a scene in front of the family. Their clashes were kept private—even to my mother.
