Gritting her teeth, she had pushed the thought away. Control, she reminded herself. Always control. Sighing heavily, she had slumped on the settee and cursed herself for ever making such a stupid bargain.
Now, this morning, she continued to toss and turn in her bed. Unable to push away the thought of Bradford covering her. Filling her. Taking her. Every part of her body shivered with the memory of what it had been like.
Throwing her covers aside, she pulled the bell rope for Mary. This could not be allowed to continue. Once she had bathed and broken her fast, she hunted down Evans and inquired after His Lordship.
Evans told her that his Lordship was probably at the pond. “But My Lady,” he added with a frown. “He prefers not to be disturbed when he goes there. It is his sanctuary.”
Olivia had balked for a second but then shook off her doubt. No, she needed to do this now or it might never be done. He was alone, away from others. She could do this now. It would be easier. Thanking Evans, she stepped out into the gardens and made her way to the pond.
A tall hedgerow separated the pond from the gardens and the house. Creating a small, separate space.
As she rounded the hedge she froze. There was Bradford, dressed in only a white linen shirt and rough woolen pants. His back to her, she halted and stared. Unknowingly licking her lips at the sight of his wide shoulders and strong back.
The man was feeding bread to the ducks in the pond. A blue and green tufted Drake, his brown spotted spouse and a dozen adorable ducklings were paddling around a few feet out in the water. Scrambling for chunks of bread as His Lordship tossed them.
“Bradford, what are you doing?” she asked before she could stop herself.
He startled for a moment then turned to look over his shoulders. “I don’t know about the Caldwell household. But here in Basingstoke, we call it feeding ducks.”
Olivia laughed at herself, he was right, her question had been idiotic.
“I mean why?” she said as she stepped up next to him, catching a hint of his sandalwood scent that ignited memories in her she couldn’t deal with at the moment. It was important that she stay focused. Business like. It was the only way she could get through this.
The man was so tall, so big. Just standing next to him made her feel small, feminine. A feeling she could grow to treasure.
“Because they are hungry,” he answered with a smirk.
“Bradford, they are ducks. They eat grass,” she replied, refusing to let him dismiss her to easily.
He shrugged his shoulders and tossed another chunk of bread. The Drake caught it in mid-air but dropped a piece for his mate.
“Here,” Bradford said as he tore off a chunk of bread and handed it to her. “But don’t tell cook. She gets upset when I steal a loaf. She says it is not her job to feed half the ducks of England.”
Oliva took the bread and started feeding the ducks, making a point to aim for the babies. “Evans said you didn’t like to be disturbed here,” she said hesitantly. “I am sorry if I bothered you.”
He smiled down at her and shook his head. “It is perfectly all right. I am just avoiding a pile of reports.”
Olivia tossed another piece of bread and examined her surroundings. A small stream spill over rocks into the pond. Almost an acre of still black water. Willows lined the far bank, their branches skimming across the top of the water. At the far end, the pond gurgled over a small wooden damn and then fell off into the distant valley.
A calm breeze brought her the scent of wildflowers and distant hay fields.
“It is peaceful. I can see why you like it so much,” she said as she closed her eyes and took a deep breath.
He nodded. “When I was overseas, this was the spot I missed the most. The one place I dreamed about at night.”
Her heart broke a little, it was hard to imagine Bradford missing anything. Oh, how she wished he could miss her, dream of her.
“Here, Olivia,” he said as he tossed the last of his bread to the ducks. “Why don’t we have a seat? The longer I can delay those reports the better.”
She followed his direction and saw a wooden bench that had been installed next to the hedge. The perfect spot to catch the afternoon sun.
He placed a hand on the small of her back and gently guided her across the grass. Her insides turned over at his touch. Such a simple thing, possessive, protective, and tantalizing. A hot flame spread from where his fingers brushed against her back.
Swallowing hard, she sat down, adjusting her dress, glancing at him as he sat down next to her. The length of his leg lay against hers. His shoulders only a fractions from hers. It was enough to make her forget why she was there.
Taking a deep breath, she forced her mind to work again as she desperately tried to think of something to say. Anything to divert her racing heart.
“You don’t like reading reports? It is all Nathanial does, it seems,” she asked as she glanced at him. He really is handsome she thought as once again her mind began to wander to places it shouldn’t
He laughed gently. “Nathanial does it because he loves it. I do it because I was trained to do it. So no, it is not my favorite pastime.”
She frowned for a moment. There was so much she didn’t know about her husband.
“What would you have been if you had not been a Lord?” she asked. “I mean if you had the choice.”
A quiet fell over them for a moment, then Bradford chuckled. “No one has ever asked me that before.” He paused for a moment as Olivia held her breath, waiting for him to finish the answer.
“In all honesty,” he continued, “I have never really thought about it. Too many people are dependent upon me being a good Lord. Not just my family, but my tenants, the staff, the merchants both here in town and in London. It is all I know how to do. So I believe it is good that I was born to it.”
Olivia’s heart melted. He is a good man, she realized. While that knowledge had always been assumed. Having it confirmed only added to her love for the man. Nathanial did what he did because he loved it. Bradford did it because it was his duty.
Looking out over the water, Olivia watched as the ducks made their way across the pond and waddled out on the far bank before disappearing behind a willow. It wasn’t fair she thought. The ducks knew happiness. They were living the life they expected. Working together to raise a family.
“What did you want to discuss Olivia?” Bradford asked, taking her hand in his, gently running his thumb across the back of her wrist.
Olivia's heart sank and a million butterflies took flight in her stomach. She had started out so sure of herself. But now, the thought of being rejected by this man tore at her very soul. How could she possibly risk a look of regret or hesitation if she were to ask for what she wanted?
Any other man and she might have been able to do it. To dismiss her feelings. It would not have been critical. But this man, at this time. No. It was just too hard.
“Olivia,” he said again, his voice caressing her. “What is it? You can tell me.”
She glanced up at him, their eyes locked as her heart fell into an abyss. Oh, how she loved him.
“I am without child,” she said at last, her gaze instantly falling to their interlocked hands.
From the corner of her eye, she saw Bradford nod somberly. “I am sorry,” he said. “I know that it is important to you.”
Olivia’s insides relaxed a little, he hadn’t dismissed her concerns. She glanced at him quickly then looked away. He had returned her look but remained quiet, waiting.
Damn the man, he was going to make her be explicit. Why couldn’t he read her mind at the moment? Or perhaps he did and was making her go through with her demand. Making her say it out loud.
Taking a deep breath, she held it for a moment then said. “it is just that, from what I have been told, this is the best opportunity. That this time of …”
He remained silent, cocking an eyebrow as if trying to decipher an ancient code.
“Lady Bradford,
are you asking me to take you to my bed?”
Olivia slumped as she let out a long breath. Finally, the man had developed a brain.
The silence continued to hang between them like a brick wall. Keeping them separated. She continued to study her lap, terrified to look up at him.
“You will have to answer Olivia,” he said at last, breaking through the tension. “I would never want to make an assumption where it came to such a matter.”
She bit the inside of her lip to stop herself from saying what she really wanted to say. If she let herself go she would curse the man a blue streak, but that would not benefit her goal. No, she would keep her sharp tongue in check.
Instead, she looked up and nodded. “Yes, Bradford,” she said. “That is what I am asking…. For a child of course.”
He smiled slightly and nodded. “Of course, Lady Bradford. For a child of course.”
Chapter Eighteen
Lord Bradford looked at his wife, then out across his pond. His heart jumped with anticipation at her words. She might have couched it behind the need for a child, but he had seen the look in her eyes. She wanted him. She needed him.
Unfortunately, he was beginning to realize that he needed her as well. The last two weeks had been a living hell. But now, here she was, finally, asking him to take her.
Stay in control, he told himself. Do not let her see the need burning inside him. He must not expose his secret. Yet, at the same time, this was the perfect opportunity to show her what she was missing.
Turning to her, he casually draped an arm across the back of the bench behind her. She flinched ever so slightly at his touch. She is nervous, he realized, which sent a smile to his soul. Her nervousness reassured him that he still held the reins in this situation.
“You know Olivia,” he said gently as he whispered in her ear. “You are a remarkably beautiful woman.”
She blushed as she quickly glanced at him, then away again.
She is like a doe caught in the morning sunrise, he thought. The slightest disturbance and she would bolt. He must calm her spirits. Reassure her. He must lead her to where she wanted to go.
“Do you trust me?” he asked.
He forehead narrowed slightly in a tight frown before she nodded. “I believe so,” she answered through pressed lips.
He sighed internally. It was good that his wife trusted him. They had come a long way. If he had asked her that question before their marriage he was sure to have received a reply in the negative.
“Good,” he said gently as he reached up to push a stray strand of hair behind her ear. She shivered at his touch but did not bolt. A positive indication that he could take this where he wanted. Leaning down, he gently kissed her neck.
“Bradford!” she exclaimed as she drew back away from him. “What are you doing. Someone might see.”
He laughed. “They know not to bother me here. This is our own little world.” He said as his fingers drew down her arm, gently caressing, his eyes never leaving hers.
“Here, we may do as we wish.”
Her cheeks grew even redder as she stared back at him, obviously unable to believe him. Quickly, she twisted to see if anyone was able to see them.
“Trust me, Olivia,” he said as he brought his lips to hers.
For the briefest moment she held back, but then her body betrayed her as she leaned into him, her lips taking all that he could give.
Without thinking, his hand cupped her breast, squeezing gently. She moaned softly as his hand slipped down inside the front of her dress and took a nipple.
“Oh James,” she said as she melted into him.
He smiled to himself. Moments ago she had been worried about being discovered. Now, she had forgotten that and instantly responded to him. The woman was perfect. So tempting, pure yet needing. Beautiful, yet willing. The burning desire inside of him began to build into a raging fire quickly.
Slow, he told himself. Slow and sure. If he wasn’t careful he would take and never worry about her needs. No, for this to work. It had to be about her.
Returning to kissing her, his hand reached for the hem of her dress as he began to pull her dress up so that he might gain access to what he desperately wanted. Her fingers instinctively dropped to stop him. He didn’t fight her. Instead, he pulled the top of her dress down so that he might take a nipple in his mouth.
Her head fell back as she sighed heavily. When he shifted ever so slightly, her hands came to his head, holding him in place. Drinking in the pleasure he was giving her. It was all the sign he needed as he once again worked on gathering her dress enough to slip a hand under it.
As his fingers traced up the inside of her thigh he marveled at her silky softness. Every part of his body screamed at him to take her now. To thrust into her until he achieved release. But he held back. Instead, gently caressing her soft virginal thighs until she opened for him.
YES, he thought as his fingers found her already prepared for him. She needs me as much as I need her.
Moaning heavily, her hands dropped from his head to hold his hand in place. To hold it there while she worked herself against his fingers.
“Yes, James,” he moaned as a wave of pleasure washed over her. “YES.”
He held himself there, allowing her to finish her pleasure. Once she had returned to their world, he looked up into her eyes and asked again, “Do you trust me?”
She bit her lip as she slowly nodded. He smiled and arched his back so he could slide his trousers down. Olivia gasped as she quickly scanned the area to see if anyone was looking. He smiled to himself. She had not worried so much when she was in the throes of passion. But for some reason, anyone seeing him half naked bothered her.
“Come here,” he said as he took her waist in both hands and lifted her up and onto his lap.
“Bradford,” she squealed.
He simply smiled up at her as he slowly lowered her unto his hardness. Her eyes grew as big as dinner plates before they rolled back into her head as he filled her.
“Oh, James,” she said softly.
He bit the inside of his mouth to stop himself from thrusting. No this was to be about her. Every muscle screamed to be freed. Every animalistic urge demanded to be released. His heart pounded and his legs quivered at the restraint.
No, this had to be about her.
Leaning forward, he took her breast into his mouth as his hands on her waist gently urged her forward.
At last, she understood and rocked herself into him. The gasp of pure pleasure that escaped from her made his insides smile. The woman was too tantalizing for his own good. So tight, so warm and soft and perfect.
“Oh, Yes,” she moaned as she rocked back and forth on his hardness. Driving herself higher. Driving him to madness.
Her eyes closed as she focused ever part of her being on obtaining every last portion of pleasure from the moment. Thrusting herself on him, over and over again until at last, she achieved Nirvana, clamping down hard around him as she threw her head back and moaned.
The sight of her pleasure was too much for him, he could restrain himself no longer. Gripping her waist, holding her in place, he thrust up into her and exploded.
The two of them rode the crest of the wave together then fell into each other’s arms. Exhausted, spent, and satisfied.
Eventually, he pulled back to look into her eyes. She smiled shyly.
“One thing I must give you, Lord Bradford,” She said with a twinkle in her eyes. A look of happiness that made his heart sing.
“What is that? Lady Bradford,” he asked as he rubbed himself against her.
Her eyes closed as she sighed heavily, obviously enjoying him.
At last, she pulled her attention back to him. “You are never boring.”
“Neither are you, Lady Bradford.”
She laughed as she slid off of him and adjusted her dress.
“No, we are not boring,” she said as she gave him a strange look. A look that could have meant a dozen differen
t things.
Bradford adjusted his own clothes and then motioned that perhaps they should return to the house. If they didn’t, he realized. He would spend the afternoon ravishing her and at some point, they were sure to be discovered. Besides, he must remain distant. She must come to him. She must admit defeat. It was the only way.
Although, with every breath, it became harder and harder for him to maintain his distance. The woman was wrapping him up in a spell. Of that, there was no doubt. Every glance, every swish of her hip. Ever smile and feminine look. All of it was designed to entrap him.
What made it even more enticing was the fact the woman had no idea of what she was doing to him. If she had, then he would already be lost.
.o0o.
Olivia hugged herself as they slowly made their way back to the house. Would anyone be able to tell? She wondered. Would they know just by looking at her what his Lordship and she had done?
The thought of others knowing embarrassed her for some reason. Yet, they were man and wife. Why should she worry about such things? If she and her husband wished a private moment together then it was none of their concern.
Sighing internally, she glanced at Bradford. The man was a secret hidden in a puzzle box. He gave her no indication of what he thought, how he felt. Nothing. It was as they had spent the afternoon feeding the ducks.
Her heart fell. She had hoped that perhaps, maybe, that this time he might indicate his feelings on the matter. But no such luck.
As they approached the house, Evans stepped out to greet them.
“I take it that the ducks are fed, My Lord,” he said with a small smile.
“Yes, they are, Evans. They are very content, I assure you.” Bradford responded. “In fact, for some reason, I find that I have worked up a bit of an appetite,” he added as he shot Olivia a knowing look. Her cheeks immediately grew warm with embarrassment.
“Have someone prepare me a plate. And inform cook that I promise not to let it ruin my dinner.” Bradford added as he continued to look at Olivia. “A man must keep up his energy after all.”
Catching A Rake (A Rake's Redemption Book 3) Page 12
