by Jenna Mindel
“Then there’s nothing to worry about. Right?” Stella’s expression betrayed that sentiment. She looked concerned too.
“You’re probably right.” Bree joined Stella in putting up a good front, but it didn’t make her feel any better.
She wanted more with Darren, but it’d be a huge mistake to give up this opportunity. One she’d regret the rest of her days. That kind of resentment wouldn’t be fair to him. She’d resent staying behind to see where this went, and then what if they ended up nowhere?
Her plans had been so clear before. Why so much muddiness after a kiss? Didn’t seem fair having to choose between following her dreams and her heart.
“I think I should leave early for Seattle.” Bree could run, away from her feelings and the man who owned them.
“When?”
Her mother wasn’t quite ready to take over the class, but she would be after next week. Bree would simply steer clear of Darren until then. No more off-the-beaten-path outings. And no more kisses. Vacation was officially over. She’d miss Memorial Day with her family if she left early, but the Anderson barbecue and the Maple Springs parade were small sacrifices in the scheme of things. Her heart twisted. Some things couldn’t be helped.
“After the next class.”
Stella gave her a sad-eyed look of disappointment. “Falling in love is not the end of the world.”
“For me, it is.” Bree ran her finger around the rim of the tea cup. “For me, it sure is.”
* * *
Darren’s phone whistled with an incoming text. He waited until he stopped his truck at a red light before checking who it came from.
Bree.
How’s Neil?
Guilt ripped through him. He should have called her or texted. He should have let her know last night when things had improved, but he’d been spent. He called her.
“Hey, Darren.” Her voice sounded incredibly soft.
Remembering the feel of her hair and the texture of her lips, he gritted his teeth. “Neil is stable. Are you home?”
“Yes, but—”
“Can I swing by?”
“Umm. Sure.”
“See you in about ten minutes.”
He’d planned on seeing Bree today anyway. He would have called her from the hospital, maybe to meet up for dinner or something. They needed to have a talk. He blew out his breath. He couldn’t use Neil’s accident as an excuse for the way he’d kissed her. It’d be convenient—understandable, even—but false. He’d kissed her because he’d wanted to. Plain and simple.
Only it didn’t feel simple. That couple of kisses hadn’t been enough. He wanted more than she could give him. More than he should ask for.
When he pulled up in front of the Anderson cottage, Bree was there, waiting for him on the porch. Her hair hung loose, draping her shoulders, but worry marred her pretty brow.
She hurried toward him, scanning his faded jeans and cotton shirt. “No work today?”
“I took the day off.”
“Can we walk?” Bree scrunched her nose. That meant she needed to talk, too. More scary stuff.
He surveyed the neighboring cottages. More of them were opening up now, getting ready for summer. Gardeners worked on lawns or planted flower beds and boxes. Raleigh’s family usually arrived after Memorial Day, so she wouldn’t be around Bay Willows when the hired help was opening up the cottage. He’d always had a better chance of running into her in town anyway.
No matter how he sliced it, he was a baby. Scared of the woman he used to love and scared of the woman he could love if she stuck around.
“How about down by the water?” he suggested.
“I know a shortcut. Come on.” Bree waved him out of the truck. “You said Neil is stable. What’s that mean?”
Darren ran a hand through his hair and got out of his truck. “I’m sorry I didn’t text you or call last night. The surgeon saved his leg. They pumped him full of antibiotics and he responded well. The doctors expect a good recovery in time. He woke up after surgery, and Kate was able to talk to him.”
“Thank You, God.” Bree closed her eyes. Her concern was real. She truly cared.
Guilt smacked him again. He hadn’t given her enough credit. He’d lumped her in with what he’d thought were pretentious summer folk. People he’d resented since he was a kid. He’d even kept the comparison of her to his ex-fiancée alive after it was obvious that Bree wasn’t anything like Raleigh. Bree was different. Special.
“I was on my way to see him when you texted.”
Her brow furrowed again, and she stopped walking. “Oh, I’m sorry. Did you need to go?”
He shook his head. “I’ll go later. I needed to see you today. To talk.”
“Yes. Me, too.” Bree slipped through a hedge of bushes on a worn downhill path to the lake. “Watch your step.”
The incline was indeed steep, but short. Lazy waves lapped against the sand mixed with rocks and pebbles. Many docks had been installed for the season and reached out like fingers into Maple Bay.
They crossed the road onto a narrow sidewalk that followed the shoreline. The warm sun caressed his back and shoulders until the lakeside breeze blew in crisp over the still chilly waters.
Bree shivered and crossed her arms.
Darren wrapped his arm around her, drawing her close. “Cold?”
She tensed but didn’t pull away. “Thanks.”
He might as well start the conversation they needed to have. “I’m not sorry I kissed you.”
“I am.”
He stopped and faced her. “Why?”
She wouldn’t look at him. Her gaze hit him somewhere in the middle of his chest.
He lifted her chin and ran his fingertip where her dimples showed when she smiled. Bree wasn’t smiling now. “Why are you sorry?”
She glared at him. “Because I have feelings for you. Because I’m leaving soon and I don’t want to—”
He leaned down and kissed her. Quick and hard.
She pushed him away. “That’s not helping.”
Hearing her admit that she cared did something to him. Something he didn’t expect. Something he didn’t want to lose. “Why Seattle? Do you really have to go way out there?”
“Seriously? Don’t even think of asking me to stay.” Now she looked angry.
He didn’t want to let this die, but then, what kind of chance did they have after only a few dates? “I suppose we can keep in touch.”
That sounded lame even to his ears. They’d known each other only a couple of weeks, but that was long enough to have feelings for each other. Very real feelings he should have known better than to pursue. Hadn’t he learned his lesson? Whirlwind romances didn’t last.
Even if they kept in touch, he knew how it’d go. They’d do fine for the first few months, until the novelty wore off. They couldn’t maintain a long-distance relationship for two years. When Bree left, they’d be done. He’d known that all along and yet he’d let her in. He’d let himself care.
“I suppose we could.” She bit her bottom lip. She wasn’t convinced, either.
He wanted to kiss her again but started walking instead. “It is what it is.”
“Right,” she agreed, skipping to catch up. “What happened last night is reason enough not to get involved, considering the circumstances. We can remain friends.”
Darren let loose a sarcastic chuckle. There was no going back to that, not after that kiss. They might have something to build on if distance wasn’t an issue, but— He looked up and froze.
Heart pounding in his ears, Darren stared at his ex-fiancée, hand in hand with Tony, walking the shoreline. The couple was headed straight for them.
Bree saw them, too.
He stared at Raleigh’s cool gaze and didn’t lo
ok away. The woman seemed perfectly at ease, as if it was no big deal what she’d done to him.
He curled his hands into fists but forced them back open when he felt Bree’s touch to his arm. He took a deep breath. He’d been running from this moment for over a year and a half. Today he faced his past. Ironic, considering he discussed his future with Bree.
He didn’t move or speak. He simply stood there and stared at the two of them. At least Tony looked uncomfortable, and that gave Darren some satisfaction.
“Hi, Darren.” Raleigh stopped in front of him. Her blond hair glimmered in the sunshine, but she didn’t look as good as he remembered. She looked thinner. More hollow. Her heavily made up eyes narrowed. “And Bree. I didn’t know you two knew each other.”
“Yeah.” Darren didn’t offer any explanations.
“How are you?” Bree’s voice lacked its usual warmth. If he hadn’t known her, he wouldn’t have been able to tell she was being short. Almost rude—for her.
“Can’t complain.” Raleigh flicked her hair over her shoulder.
That was a new one. He seemed to remember that Raleigh typically had something to complain about. Darren looked at his friend, the guy he’d grown up with. They’d ridden the bus together, played sports and pretty much shared everything. He could add girlfriends to that list now.
Darren curled his fists again. “Tony.”
Tony finally met his gaze. He looked sheepish, as if thinking the same thing as Darren. “How’ve you been?”
That was the question of the century. Being chased out of his own hometown for fear of this face-to-face pretty much summed up how he’d been. No matter how much he wanted to vent, Darren didn’t bother. The effort didn’t seem worth it anymore. “I’ve had my moments.”
That got to Raleigh. She kicked at an imaginary pebble on the sidewalk. “We’re moving to St. Louis at the end of the month. Tony accepted a position there. Good future and all.”
Darren clenched his jaw. They both chased a lifestyle instead of a life. He expected to feel angry, but the sadness that shot through his veins surprised him. There was no going back for them. Things had changed forever.
Darren was suddenly okay with that. Finally. “I hope you guys find what you’re looking for.”
Raleigh’s eyes widened at the resignation in his voice. She looked unsettled as if his forgiveness wasn’t something she expected. He might have misread her. He’d been good at misreading her. “Yeah, you too.”
Darren stepped off the sidewalk to let them pass. He didn’t look back. He felt Bree’s hand slip into his own and gave her fingers a squeeze. “Want to grab lunch?”
Bree looked back at the man and woman who’d once torn his world apart. “Are you okay?”
Darren considered the question. Was he? “Doesn’t matter.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“No. I’m done with all that. With them.” Glancing at Bree’s hand wrapped firmly in his own made him wonder if maybe he’d found what he truly wanted.
Bree was real and she cared. Problem was, he didn’t want her to leave. But by asking her to stay, he might lose her forever.
Chapter Eleven
Darren’s stony expression made Bree nervous. He was either angry or hurting or both and she didn’t know how to help. So she remained silent as they cut through the line of willow trees that marked the main entrance of Bay Willows.
The sidewalk ended but they continued walking, through the public boat launch toward the public beach. The sun shone high in the sky, making the blue waters of Maple Bay glimmer. A couple of sailboats skimmed the horizon.
She should say something.
“Want to sit down?” Darren broke their silence and headed for one of several park benches. “I don’t really want lunch, do you?”
Bree scrunched her nose. She’d eaten breakfast a couple of hours before Darren had picked her up. She slipped next to him but not too close. “No. Not really. I’m sorry about running into them.”
Darren shrugged. “Bound to happen. I don’t know what I was so worried about.”
“Maybe you weren’t ready before.” Bree took in the view and sighed. “Beautiful, isn’t it?”
“I think so.” Darren gazed out at the lake a moment and then turned toward her. “Why isn’t this enough for you people?”
You people? Bree didn’t react to the harsh tone of his voice. “What do you mean?”
He leaned his elbows on his knees. The blue polo shirt he wore stretched taut across his back, begging for her touch. She kept her hands to herself. He didn’t look like he’d welcome her comfort.
He sat back and blew out his breath. “All my life I’ve heard summer residents say they could never live up here year-round. It’s too small, there isn’t a mall, there isn’t this or that. They complain about all the things that make Maple Springs special, yet every summer, here you all come.”
Bree shifted. “For many, it’s an escape up north. A good vacation place that’s just not reality.”
He gave her a hard look. “What about you?”
She stared straight back. Bree didn’t like where this was going. “I love a good vacation like everyone else, and thanks to you, that’s exactly what I had.”
“So that’s it. That’s all this has been. Just forget about your feelings?”
Feelings she’d admitted to not wanting. “I have to.”
“Why?”
Her defenses rose. “If I wasn’t satisfied playing with the symphony in Detroit, a small regional chamber orchestra up here won’t fill the gap. It can’t provide the opportunities I need.”
He leaned back, making the park bench squeak. “Be careful chasing ideals and bright lights. Sometimes the simple things are what matter most in life. And sometimes, the most fulfilling.”
She didn’t want to hear it, especially from him. Who was he angry with? Raleigh or her? Maybe both. “Why the big chip on your shoulder when it comes to the resort crowd? And why on earth would you fall for someone like Raleigh?”
His blue eyes glittered with anger.
Bree might have pushed him too far, but instead of trying to smooth it over or backtrack, she remained quiet. Waiting. She wanted to know.
Finally, he said, “See that raft over there in the swimming area?”
Bree nodded.
“Growing up, winter was tough for me as a kid. We lived far out and there was little to do after school before we got into high school sports. Come spring, my brothers and I stayed in town after school. We’d hang out and we owned this beach. At least until the summer crowd showed up and we had to share. I didn’t like sharing.”
Bree could easily picture Darren as the kid he’d painted. Roaming around this small town with an arrogance of his own. “And?”
He shrugged. “As far as I was concerned, that raft belonged to me and mine as soon as the water warmed enough to get in it. We’d earned it after the boredom of a long winter. And no one tested us, no one tried to take it from us, until summer break and the Bay Willows crowd came. You guys have your own private beach barred to locals, but every year your kids had to have our beach and raft. One summer, I’d had enough and took a stand. My brothers and cousins had my back.”
“How old were you?”
He shrugged. “Maybe thirteen.”
“What happened?”
“A fight ensued, and Parks and Recreation posted two lifeguards at the public beach from then on. One on the raft and one near the bathhouse. It might sound silly now, but I got the message loud and clear. The summer crowd comes first. As a kid I didn’t understand how much this town relied on the dollars tourists bring to the area. I felt diminished, as if locals get the scraps. I was sick of coming in second place.”
“You’ve been protecting your town ever since, trying t
o hang on to what’s yours.”
“Something like that.” He stared out over the bay.
It made sense. And must have made Raleigh’s betrayal slice even deeper. Darren was stuck in old resentments, and she didn’t want to get stuck.
He looked at her, and something shifted between them. A new level of understanding. “I’ve got to head back. Are you walking with me?”
“Yes, I’ll walk with you.” She stood.
He hadn’t invited her to visit Neil, but then, she didn’t expect him to. She had her cello practice yet to do. Still, she didn’t like things left between them like this. An uncomfortable impasse. She held out her hand. “Friends?”
He took her hand and squeezed before letting go. “Always.”
Did he mean it? She hoped so. She didn’t have much time for close friends but knew Darren could be one of them. He could be more if she wasn’t leaving. Much more.
As they walked back the way they’d come, Bree prayed this music residency would finally answer her own needs to be more. Chasing shadows of something she couldn’t even name was getting old, but she couldn’t give up on her dreams of composing yet. Not without hearing her music played. Not without making some kind of impact.
Bree glanced at Darren. Hands in pockets, he looked pretty gloomy. “Tell me about foraging for asparagus in the next class,” she said. “It’s one of my favorite vegetables.”
He chuckled. “You’re in for a treat. I’ve been out to a couple of spots and cut the ferns so we’ll have lots of good shoots to pick for class.”
“How will you remember where they are? The ones you cut.” They rounded the corner, and her parents’ cottage came into view. Too soon, their walk was over, but at least it ended on a lighter note, talking about class. She walked him to his truck.
“I’ll remember.”
She had no doubt that would be true. Stella had once said that Darren knew the woods and countryside like the back of his hand. Like he owned it. In a way, he did. This area was his home, a place he loved the way she loved music. That’d never change.
