by Lucy Langton
As more tea was served to them by an attendant, the two went silent, trying to pretend as though nothing much of importance was happening. But deep down, there was a fire burning within Timothy that was so intense, he was sure he would turn into dust.
“I must see you alone, My Lady. I need it,” he went on.
“I need the same. But it’s impossible,” Lady Helena replied.
“We’ll stay at the hotel. The one that we love. Pillsbury Ascot.”
“Such a fine hotel,” Lady Helena replied.
“I’ll secure a room, for this very night!”
“Impossible. I must dine with Lord Clifford tonight.”
Timothy was at a loss. Why should Lady Helena send him an ardent letter, only to convey that their relationship was impossible, at best? Was the woman trying to undo him completely?
“Very well,” Timothy replied, becoming upright and guarded.
“There’s no need to be cold,” Lady Helena protested.
“No, there very much is a need to be cold. You make hot blood run through my veins, then you douse me with icy water.”
“That’s not fair!” Lady Helena protested.
“Let’s not speak of it any further,” Lord Timothy added.
He knew he was acting like a child, but he was like a young boy who desperately wanted his favourite toy only to find that he could not have it. It was agony, and he could not think of what to say to her next.
“I’m leaving,” Lady Helena said, tears beginning to form.
“Don’t, my love,” Timothy protested, standing to his feet and trying to prevent her from going.
“We can try another time,” Lady Helena said in hushed tones. “Try to talk.”
“We can talk now.”
“No, no, it’s too difficult,” Lady Helena replied, and quickly grabbed her reticule and rushed out of Surrey Highland.
Timothy was left bereft and confused. What the devil was he to do next? Maybe he had to take the initiative. Challenge Lord Clifford White to a duel and inform Lady Sophia that their days were numbered.
Such cruelty, and all in the name of love.
Timothy would return the family to Willow Grange the very next day. He couldn’t stand to be in town for a moment longer, and what’s more, he wished for Lady Helena to summon him back.
Chapter 14
The morning after returning to the country, as Philip came down for breakfast he noticed that Sophia was seated quietly at the table, looking down at her tea. That beautiful flush was no longer upon her cheek, and Philip wondered what had happened the day before.
“Good morning,” he said by way of greeting, seating himself down at the table.
“Good morning,” Sophia replied with a soft mumble.
“Are you going to eat that?” Philip asked humorously, pointing to the scone that was on her plate.
“I am,” she replied flatly.
Philip knit his brow in confusion. Sophia was not acting like herself, and he didn’t like it one bit.
“What is the matter?” he asked, deciding to cut to the chase.
“What do you mean?”
“You seem downcast and sad.”
“Not everyone can be cheery every day.”
Philip was growing frustrated. He did not like it when he couldn’t cheer Sophia up, and he hated the notion that there was something bothering her that she would not talk to him about.
“How was the tea?” Philip asked casually.
“It was rather amusing.”
“Sophia, if you don’t explain yourself at once, I’m going to beat it out of you.” With this, the servants all stopped mid-step and turned, their ears perked up. Philip sighed to himself and relented. “I’m sorry. I did not mean to raise my voice.”
“It’s quite all right,” Sophia replied, turning to him. “I’m not in good spirits, I’m afraid. I believe I just need a day to myself.”
A day to herself? Meaning that Philip could not bother her, get in her way, and demand her attention? Heavens, no. Philip wouldn’t stand for that.
But considering that the lady did seem to be in a bad place, Philip thought it his duty to do as she asked. Then he did something that he never thought possible. He allowed Sophia to eat her breakfast in silence. Later that morning, when she was out in the garden, he did not pick twigs and place them in her hair. And all throughout the day as she did things around the house, Philip gave her the space that she required.
It was agony.
Was her distance a result of something that he had done? Was he to blame? Certainly, he didn’t say or do anything that was out of the ordinary. Something must have transpired at that tea to leave Sophia in the state that she was in.
He already knew what would happen. Yes, Philip had warned her, and in the distress of seeing her so downcast, Philip had forgotten about his warning, worrying too deeply that the coolness had something to do with his own person.
Through some space and introspection, Philip imagined that he would give Sophia all the time and distance that she needed to recover. When she was ready to speak, he hoped she might come to him and do so. He would wait for her until then, and dream about her more and more so, due to the absence.
His biggest fear was that Sophia had found out about Timothy’s mistress. It pained him to think that it might be true, but in reality, it was the only outcome that seemed plausible. Sophia must have heard gossip at the tea, and what’s worse, she must have been treated poorly by those detestable ladies because of her sorry plight.
A thought came to mind that Philip thought ideal. He would make sure that Sophia was out that night, he’d pay for an expensive evening out on the town with Arabella, and whilst Sophia was gone, Philip would have a confrontation with Timothy. Although this distanced Sophia from him even further, it ensured that Philip had some measure of control over the situation, and that he was moving things in a direction that he thought best.
Philip immediately sent a note to the manager of the Queen’s Hotel, informing him that Sophia would be dining there that very evening with her maid. Although rarely in town, Philip still had connections there that were sound. He would inform Sophia of the plans, and what’s more, he’d inform his brother of the same.
“May I have a word with you?” Philip asked, walking into the library to discover his brother at his customary place. He seemed to be hard at work writing a letter, and Philip could only imagine to whom that must be for.
“If you wish,” Timothy replied, not looking up.
“Sophia will be out this evening. I have made arrangements for it. You and I will take dinner in the dining room at seven o’clock.”
“Is that so?” Timothy asked, leaning back in his chair and meeting his brother’s gaze.
“It is so. I require it.”
“And must I do something that you require?”
“On this occasion, yes,” Philip replied, swiftly leaving the room.
That being done, Philip found Arabella and informed her of the arrangement, thinking that it was still best to give Sophia the space that she required. Arabella found the idea pleasing, and all was sorted.
It was later that evening when Sophia was walking towards the door, en route to her evening on the town, that she stopped and looked at Philip quizzically.
“I welcome this little sojourn,” she said, “but I can’t quite glean what the meaning of it might be.”
“I think it will be best for you to get out of the house, without having to endure the pesky company of high society, or even that of your own husband,” Philip replied.
Finally, Sophia gave a faint smile. “Thank you,” she said softly, as though she knew what Philip’s real intentions were.
“Anything for you,” Philip replied.
As Sophia left the townhouse, Philip watched her go and took a deep breath. She was absolutely lovely, even in her sadness. He waited until she was in the carriage and on her way before turning towards the dining room to face the duty at hand.
/> “What’s this all about, brother?” Timothy asked, entering the dining room.
“I think that you know.”
“Let’s dine first, and then speak. I can’t fight with you on an empty stomach,” Timothy replied.
Within no time the steak was served, along with scalloped potatoes and tender peas.
The brothers ate in silence, which was nothing out of the ordinary for them. Philip recalled as a young boy that the two had never been close for reasons he could not comprehend. They simply had different interests and inclinations, and Philip sensed that Timothy was slightly intimidated by his younger brother, considering that Philip might have as much interest in the dukedom as himself.
The meal being done, Timothy brought his napkin up to his lips and then threw it on the table. “Speak,” he said.
“I’m concerned for Sophia,” Philip began, and Timothy turned to his brother in surprise, perhaps thinking that the conversation was going to be about something else entirely.
“Are you truly going to sit here and talk to me about my wife?” Timothy asked.
“I am,” Philip replied.
Although Timothy visibly scoffed at first, he softened and resigned himself to the subject at hand.
“The situation is entirely out of my hands,” Timothy finally admitted.
“What do you mean it’s out of your hands?”
“I cannot love her.”
“Because of your mistress?” Philip asked.
“Yes.”
That response hung in the air for several moments before Philip continued. “You cannot give Sophia what she needs,” Philip said.
“I cannot consummate the relationship, no,” Timothy openly admitted. “Brother, I do not know what Lady Helena White has done to me, but I cannot love another. I’m determined to have her.”
“Have her be yours? Do you realise what kind of nonsense you’re speaking of?”
“It may sound like nonsense, but I know that Lady Helena shares my feelings.”
“So, you plan to marry a married woman?” Philip asked, indignation in his voice.
“I do not have to marry her, though I would if she agreed to it. If she does not, I merely can’t go on with my life without her. And however much I wished that I could physically love another, I don’t see that it’s possible.”
Philip felt like reaching across the table and grabbing his brother by the neck. Had he no idea how absurd his situation was? What nonsense he was speaking?
There was a sound at the door and Philip turned to find Sophia standing there, a look of surprise upon her face.
“Would you believe that the restaurant was quite full? I decided to come home instead of wait,” Sophia explained, an anxious look upon her face.
Philip wondered how long Sophia had been standing there, and just how much she had heard. Timothy appeared to be equally dumbstruck.
“I will retire to my room, now,” Sophia said, rushing out.
Philip’s heart constricted in his chest. Should he follow her? Explain to her everything that had happened? Perhaps it was good if she had overheard the conversation. It was in her best interest to know the truth of the matter. It had been hidden from her for too long.
“We’ve spilt the tea, haven’t we?” Timothy said, trying to make light of the situation.
“It seems so,” Philip replied, looking down at his empty plate.
“Shall I have a word with her?” Timothy asked.
“No, give her time and space. That’s what she needs right now.”
Timothy looked at his brother questioningly, as though he was surprised to learn that Philip knew more about his own wife than he did.
Philip would give her that time and space, and then he would go to her, whether she wished to see him or not. He would explain all, and should he be moved by courage, he would finally profess his love.
“I have thought from time to time,” Timothy finally said, “that perhaps you might be able to give Sophia what she needs.”
“What are you referring to?” Philip replied coldly.
“Fulfil my duty, to my wife,” Timothy went on. “The Clumber name needs an heir, and that heir is certainly not going to come from Lady Helena, as I hoped it might.”
Philip was in shock and dumbfounded. Had his brother really just uttered what he thought he had? Philip had to admit that it was the most exciting proposition he’d heard of in some time. There was nothing that Philip wanted more in the world than to do just that, to consummate the relationship with Sophia as a husband might. Oh, but it would be so much more than that. Philip would not see it as an act of duty but rather an act of relish. What could be more extraordinary in the world than having Sophia Barberry all to himself, if only for a night?
But Philip could not fool himself into thinking that would be enough for him. To only have her once, and to do the deed for his brother’s sake? It was utter nonsense, and Philip would not tolerate it. He needed more, so much more.
“Brother, you know as well as I do that that is impossible,” Philip replied, shaking his head.
“Come on, I know that you have affections for her,” Timothy said.
“Of course, I have affections for her,” Philip admitted for the first time. “But Sophia is not some kind of game piece we can play with at will. She deserves a husband who can fulfil his duty, and what’s more, a man who can treat her the way she deserves to be treated, and for the rest of her days.”
Chapter 15
Sophia refused to dissolve into tears again. She had heard all, all that she possibly needed to know. So the rumours were true, and Timothy did have a mistress. Although it pained her to learn of the reality of her situation, Sophia was still heartened by the fact that there was no longer a need to wonder. No longer a need to spend long nights lost in her own thoughts, questioning what she might have done wrong. Now she knew for sure that her husband loved another, and there was truly no hope for their marriage.
Another cause to abate her tears was the fact that this made Sophia free, did it not? Only in situations where a husband loved another and refused to consummate the marriage did it entitle the wife to her own privileges. She had the freedom to decide how she was going to handle the situation. It was well within her power to make the marriage void and return to America. Although this thought made her happy for a moment, Sophia couldn’t deny the fact that she was beginning to like the English countryside, and her new life. And what’s more, she was in love with Philip.
Could she not now go to him with the truth? Sophia could finally tell Philip of her yearnings, how she imagined him so many times in such an intimate fashion. Philip had similar feelings and had already expressed as much not only in subtle words, but also in action. There was very little chance that Sophia would be rejected if she came to him with the truth.
She wished to go to him that very night, but to do so would be too hasty. Sophia had just learned the news about her husband, and it would be unladylike to capitalise upon the situation that very night, even though she longed to do so.
In truth, the Queen’s Hotel had not been overcrowded. There was a lovely table waiting for her, and even Arabella was allowed a seat. The truth was that after Sophia stepped through the doors, there was a sinking feeling inside her that she could not explain. She knew full well that Philip had got her out of the house for a reason and considering all the gossip at Lady Hortensia Castle’s tea, Sophia wondered what was going on at Willow Grange. Was Philip getting her out of the house because he knew that Timothy’s mistress was to be there? If that was the case, then Sophia did not wish to hide it from herself but, rather, to see it with her own eyes.
