by Lucy Langton
It was true that he was feeling joy for his new station in the world, but Sophia was not yet free. Her fate, however much he was optimistic about it, still hung in the balance. Naturally, she still felt downcast and afraid. Of course she felt shame and guilt about what had happened between her and his brother. Considering that Sophia was the smart, sensitive woman that she was, Philip could understand why she still took the whole sordid affair to be her own fault.
Thinking that words would not comfort her, Philip merely continued to hold her. Outside his window was the night sky and the stars were shining bright. He continued to look out of that window whilst Sophia fell asleep in his arms.
Philip, however, could not sleep. The next morning after breakfast, he would take Sophia to the prince regent at once so that the matter could finally be settled and Sophia would once again be free. He would then write a letter to her mother and father in America, informing them of everything that had transpired and how Sophia was now to be his wife.
Philip’s imagination was dancing. To banish erotic notions that kept flooding his body whilst holding Sophia in his arms, Philip chose to direct his mind to tamer topics, such as how the wedding would be. Sophia would have everything she wanted – the perfect gown, the right refreshments, as many guests as she pleased. He imagined that the wedding would be held in the garden once Sophia was finished with it. Guests would be invited from near and far, and the celebration would last for the entirety of the day.
Although Philip was not the kind of man to make a show of things – in fact, he kept to himself on most occasions – he determined that for their future wedding he would want everyone to see how happy he was to have Sophia as his wife. He would become social for the first time in his existence, if only to walk around with Sophia on his arm.
These thoughts and notions made Philip dizzy and contributed to his inability to sleep. He gazed down at Sophia from time to time, watching as she slept peacefully. She was safe in his arms, and that gave Philip a great deal of comfort. And that’s what he vowed to do for the rest of his days: protect her. Every night, she would sleep in his bed and there she would be safe. Each morning, they’d take breakfast with one another so that Philip could see that she was being nourished. Then in the afternoon, he would watch her in the garden so that he was sure she was being nourished in her soul.
“I must get a hold of myself,” Philip whispered under his breath, thinking that his imagination had never operated at such a high level in his life. It was the effect that Sophia had upon him, and he didn’t regret it in the slightest. Sophia had infiltrated his mind and body, and there he wished for her to remain.
Finally, just before the sun began to appear, Philip fell asleep still holding Sophia. Before doing so, he said a little prayer to the Lord that the day’s meeting with the prince regent would be favourable. Should the outcome not be what Philip wished for, he reasoned that he’d depart with Sophia on a ship at once. He’d give up his title, and Willow Grange, if only to find a life on some distant shore with Sophia by his side.
***
Sophia was shaky the following morning. Although resolution was just around the corner, she was nervous to hear what that resolution might be. Philip instructed her to wear her finest gown, and so, Sophia chose the lavender. It was what she had worn on the ill-fated day when she was introduced at the ladies’ tea, but Sophia knew that it was what looked best on her.
She tried to eat breakfast that morning, but it was for naught. Sophia could scarce stomach a piece of toast, and Philip watched her reproachfully as she ate.
“You need your strength.”
“I can’t stop shaking,” Sophia replied.
“Because you need nourishment.”
“It will have to wait,” Sophia replied, placing the piece of toast back upon her plate.
Philip frowned at her. “We’ll dine after meeting with the prince. A celebration,” he assured her.
“That sounds nice,” Sophia replied with a bashful smile.
The carriage ride to the palace was filled with anticipation and nerves. Sophia gazed out of the window, trying to rehearse exactly what she would say. Would the prince ask her intimate details about her marriage to Timothy? Would he enquire after Sophia’s feelings towards him, and what her hopes for the future might be?
“Just breathe,” Philip said to her, taking her hand.
“I’m trying,” Sophia replied.
“Remember, I’ll be by your side the entire time. If you’re at a loss for words, I’ll speak for you.”
“I’m sure the prince regent would hardly prefer you putting words into my mouth,” Sophia teased.
“I would never put words into your mouth,” Philip assured her, squeezing her hand more tightly.
The carriage pulled up to the palace and Sophia gazed at it in awe. It was everything she imagined it might be and more. Two armed sentinels stood outside the wrought iron gates, and once their names were announced, the gate was unlocked and pulled open. The roundabout was small but stunning with its central fountain and fine statues erected on all sides.
“Beautiful,” Sophia said under her breath.
“I knew you would like it,” Philip replied.
The door to their carriage was opened and Sophia was helped down by the footman. They were led to the front door and gained entrance quickly.
The rest of the time spent waiting to meet with the regent was all a whirl. Sophia looked up at the countless paintings and tapestries upon the walls. She was seated in a plush chair and found that she couldn’t quite get a hold of her thoughts.
Trying to steady herself, Sophia couldn’t understand why the first time she spoke with the regent she was so calm. Sophia reasoned that it was probably due to the fact that the prince had entered the room without ceremony. Now, knowing that she was to meet with him, there was plenty of time to work herself up and wonder what she should say, how she should sit, and when she should speak or not speak.
“Come this way,” a footman said, and Sophia and Philip were led into what she thought to be the prince’s study. Sophia very much wished that they could meet in the garden, as she would feel freer and less confined there. But sadly, the day had turned into a gloomy one and the garden would not be ideal.
When she entered, the prince did not speak but, rather, stared at her for some time. A seat was pulled out for Sophia and she lowered herself into it, finding the prince’s glare to be slightly unnerving. Philip was seated beside her, and he unabashedly reached over and took her hand, which was clammy and cold.
“We meet again,” the prince finally said, and Sophia merely bowed her head, unsure as to what her first words should be.
“We thank you for meeting with us, sir,” Philip said.
“You have come here with some haste,” the prince went on, “and I take this to mean that you wish to have this matter resolved as soon as possible.”
“That is true, sir,” Philip replied.
“So, let’s get to the heart of the matter.”
“I have here a man of the law,” the prince went on, motioning towards a man seated in the corner with a ledger on his lap. “This gentleman is here to put your testimony today under oath. Of course, this is not a court of law,” the prince went on, “but such matters are necessary.”
“Rightly so, sir,” Philip replied.
“Do you vow that everything that you share today is true?” the gentleman in the corner asked.
“I do, sir,” Sophia replied.
“Then we can begin,” the lawyer said, nodding towards the regent.
“Were you devoted to your husband, Lady Sophia?” the prince asked.
“Indeed, sir.”
“You never shared yourself with another?”
“Never.”
“Have you ever shared yourself with any man?” the prince went on, his tone casual and aloof.
“I . . . have not, sir,” Sophia replied, looking towards Philip.
The prince paused to consider
this response, and then proceeded. “I take that to mean that the marriage between yourself and Lord Timothy was never consummated.”
“That is correct, sir,” Sophia replied.
“Remember, you are under oath,” the prince said, lifting his brow.
“It is the truth, sir,” Sophia said with great assurance. “The marriage between my husband and I was never legitimised.”
“Are you willing to undergo an examination to determine that it is so? My very own doctor could perform the task.”
“Yes, I am willing to be . . . examined, sir,” Sophia said, her hand beginning to shake in Philip’s. He gripped her hand more tightly in response.
“Very well,” the prince said, sitting back in his chair. “If your testimony proves to be true, then I am of the opinion that you shall be free from your marriage vows and allowed to remain here in this country.”
Sophia brought a hand up to her face for fear that she may begin to cry. It was happening. Finally, it was happening. Sophia Barberry was about to be free.
Chapter 25
Although Sophia was quite frightened to undergo the examination, she found that with Philip’s support it was much less daunting than she assumed it would be. He went with her to the office of the prince regent’s doctor, holding her hand and comforting her all the while. He could not enter the examination room, naturally, but he waited outside the door.
The doctor went by the name of Sir Huxtable, and the gentleman spoke to her throughout, telling her what he would be doing next and ensuring her comfort at all times.
A whirlwind of thoughts went through Sophia’s head as all of this was going on. She was quite confident that the examination would be a success, considering that she was honest when she said she had never partook of relations with a man in all her life. Yet still, Sophia couldn’t help but think of how fortunate it was that she and Philip never gave in to their desires. There were so many instances when she had wished to give herself to him fully. Even that morning as she was preparing to go to the doctor, Philip placed his large, warm hands upon her shoulders and she feared that she might melt at his very touch.
All of that frustration, longing and waiting now had meaning. Their efforts were for a grander purpose, and Sophia was quite confident that once the prince received the results of the examination, Sophia would finally be free to marry the man she truly loved.
“The session is completed,” Sir Huxtable finally said. “You have done well, Sophia,” he added warmly.
“Thank you,” she replied.
Within no time, Sophia was escorted out of the room and Philip was waiting for her with open arms. He embraced her forcefully, in that manner she was becoming accustomed to.
“You might choke me,” Sophia said humorously.
“I apologise,” Philip said, loosening his grip.
“It’s all right. I quite like it.”
He held her for some time before leading her out of the grand edifice and onto the street where the sun was shining brightly.
“Such beautiful days here in town,” Sophia said, looking up at the sun. “I do hope the sun will shine more often when we return to Willow Grange.”
“The sun is finally ready to shine there,” Philip explained warmly. “It never had a chance before. There was too much cold suffering in that home. But that is no longer.”
“Do you believe so?” Sophia asked, looking up at him.
“I know it to be so.”
As promised, Philip took Sophia out on the town for an elegant tea that afternoon, considering that Sophia had been scarce able to eat for days. Finally, she felt her appetite returning and her hopes were high. Throughout tea, Philip held her hand tightly, seemingly not caring whether or not others could see. As Sophia looked around the stately tearoom, she did note that a few diners could see his gesture, but after regarding it, most of them looked away.
Now that she was free from Timothy, would society finally accept her? Sophia had to consider it. She wasn’t entirely sure that she cared whether or not the ton took any notice of her at all. She merely wanted to be happy, and happiness was having Philip by her side.
“And now, we merely wait for the results,” Sophia said, taking a bite of her sandwich.
“I’m not concerned with the results,” Philip replied. “I already know what they are.”
“Do you know what I was thinking about during the examination?”
“Your desperate love for me?”
“You’re impossible,” Sophia replied with a smile. “I suppose that I was thinking of that, but also, of how fortunate it was that we . . . waited for so long.”
“Waited?”
“Please, don’t tell me that I need to explain myself.”
The meaning finally washing over him, Philip went silent and placed his sandwich back on the plate. He looked down at the table, lost in his thoughts.
“Have I said something wrong?” Sophia asked.
“No, no,” Philip replied plainly.
“Then what is it?”
Philip took some time before he spoke, and Sophia allowed him the space to choose his words. “I can’t talk about this here,” he finally said.
“I merely thought it humorous.”
“Sophia.” Philip was halting her with his gaze. “If we talk about this now, I fear that I’ll be incapacitated for the rest of the day. Do you understand?”
“Yes, I suppose that I do,” Sophia replied.
She only partially understood. It seemed as though the very mention of their physical relations brought Philip to a standstill. Was it all too overwhelming to discuss? In truth, it was overwhelming for Sophia, as well. And that’s why she assumed that mentioning it might loosen the immense tension between them in regard to physical love. As it turned out, Philip did not wish to make light of it, nor did he choose to discuss it in a public setting.
The afternoon carried on pleasantly enough, with Philip holding her hand as they strolled through a park and past the various shops that London was famous for. The end result of the examination did not even enter Sophia’s thoughts. She felt utterly happy and gay walking by Philip’s side with no destination in sight.
Before they even knew it, the sun had already set and the glittering lanterns of London were alight with life and mischief. Philip thought it preposterous that they should return to the townhouse. He seemed just as high in spirts as Sophia was.
“Where shall we dine?” Philip asked with hearty glee.
“Didn’t we just dine?” Sophia asked.
“Darling, that was hours ago.”
“My, how the time has passed.”
“This is what every day shall be like now,” Philip said with a smile.
“Walking around London, eating ourselves into oblivion without a care in the world?”
“Precisely,” Philip said, coming in close and placing his lips upon Sophia’s. The kiss was delicious, and she accepted it at first, until she realised they were very much in the public eye and she pulled away.
“You’re trying to land us back in the Tower of London.”
“Nonsense,” Philip replied, pulling her in again for another kiss.
“Philip!” Sophia tried to protest, but she couldn’t hold him away for too long. The deliciousness of his kisses was too much to fend off.
