by Amity Hope
She knew that she would never be able to tell her friends the truth about him. What he was or what he had done for her. That was her secret and hers alone to keep. The weight of the secrets and the lies was almost overwhelming.
As for whether or not the man her friends had seen really was Gabe, she was almost afraid to hope. She had seen him die. She had seen him fall into the fiery pit. Logic would dictate that it could not be him. That he could not come back. And yet…Ava now knew better than anyone that what she once found impossible wasn’t necessarily so.
Gabe’s father could not have conceivably been a demon. But he was.
It was unfathomable that Grier, her foster sister for years, was a Grigori. An angel. A Watcher. And yet, that was true as well.
If she had not seen it for herself, she may not believe that Gabe was Nephilim. But he was.
So was it so foolish to believe that maybe, just maybe yet another seemingly impossible thing be real?
Her mind was constantly drawn back to the day she’d thought she’d seen him through the window while she was at work. The sun had been behind him, casting his silhouette into a shadow. Yet the silhouette itself was so intensely familiar; the width of his shoulders, the lightly tousled hair, his stature. And then that flicker of something more as he’d suddenly moved out of the sun, under the awning and clearly into her view for just a split second.
In that insane, intense moment she’d been sure it had been him. She’d raced out of the shop and down the street in the direction he’d headed but he hadn’t been there. No one had been there. That was what had struck her as so odd. The sidewalk had been nearly empty. There was no one else that she could have confused him with. It was as if he, whoever he had been, had just disappeared.
Or, a nagging little voice reminded her, she had completely imagined the whole thing.
There were other times she hadn’t mentioned to her friends. Once, when she was driving by the park, the one where they’d had their picnic, she was sure she’d seen him. She’d veered off the road so quickly it was a small miracle she hadn’t caused an accident. By the time she’d pulled over to park, whoever she’d seen was gone. Again, not a trace of anyone. No sign of Gabe but no sign of anyone who could’ve been mistaken for him either.
Other times, memories of him flooded her thoughts. The images of him were so intense that until she blinked them away, they felt real.
She let out a shaky breath. Because then there was the other night, the shadow in her bedroom window. But surely, if it were Gabe, he would’ve let her know he was there. Then again, something about that shadow hadn’t seemed right.
She tried to shake off the feeling of unease that memory brought with it. It was quite possible that she’d still been half asleep. That that had all been a dream.
But the other times? She wasn’t so sure what those had been.
As for why Gabe hadn’t contacted her, if indeed it was him; at first she couldn’t imagine a reason. She couldn’t fathom that he would be cruel enough to let her believe that he was really gone. But then, a memory of a conversation they’d had flooded over her, worrying her. Gabe had made it perfectly clear to her, the morning of his death, that he didn’t consider himself worthy. He’d told her he didn’t think they could have a future together.
Because of the demonic blood that coursed through him—a legacy he received from his father—he’d suffered greatly when he’d been forced into her father’s church. It was just one of many examples he’d used to try to prove to her that he should not be with her. He felt it would be for her own good if he wasn’t.
She was so lost in thought that she nearly shrieked when her bench groaned with the weight of the body that had slumped down into it. Her eyes swept up the long legs, the lean torso and the well-muscled arms that were crossed over the broad chest. She found herself looking into a familiar, enchanting face that was accentuated with a knowing smirk.
“Looking for anyone in particular?” the cold voice mused.
“Rafe,” she returned in a voice that did not betray the panic she suddenly felt. “So nice to see you again.”
He grinned at her. His beautiful face was like Gabe’s and yet so very different. If she did not know what he was, what he was capable of, she could so easily find herself intrigued by him. The beautifully crafted cheekbones, the arched eyebrows, the vivid blue eyes all looked so achingly familiar. His hair, so inexplicably red, was nearly the only external difference. But inside, Ava knew it was like comparing coal to a fine gem. Rafe’s soul was blackened beyond repair and his outwardly appearance did nothing to fool her.
“Likewise,” he said in response to her snide comment. “So who is it you’re looking for?” he asked in amusement. “And don’t lie to me and pretend you’re not. I’ve been watching you for a while.”
Ava felt her eyebrows twitch in agitation. She’d been watching the walkway. Not paying any attention to what was going on behind her. Without meaning to, her eyes scanned the crowded area. This time, she was not looking for anyone in particular. She was simply taking comfort in the fact that there were people. Everywhere. Rafe was the last person on earth she wanted to find herself alone with.
She shrugged. “I have no intention of lying. In fact, I have no intention of telling you anything.”
He chuckled next to her ear and the sound grated through her. “You don’t have to tell me. The answer is obvious enough. No sign of my brother then?”
Ava kept her gaze positioned over the river. Gabe had warned her to never look Rafe in the eye. But furthermore, she couldn’t bear to look at him. Though they were so incredibly different, the brotherly resemblance made it painful to look at him.
“What do you want, Rafe?” she asked. She did not bother to hide her annoyance.
“The same thing you want,” he told her. “I want my brother back.”
A sharp laugh shot out of her mouth. “Why?” she demanded. “The local townspeople aren’t providing you enough amusement? No one to torture? No one to torment?”
Rafe was quiet for a moment and without meaning to, she finally looked his way. She would have preferred the usual look of derision to the one he was sweeping over her now. His eyes crept slowly over her body. Leaving her skin searing uncomfortably under the path his gaze followed.
She fought off a shudder as his eyes settled on her chest. He frowned and she knew he was staring at her pendant. At the cross that he, himself, had torn off of her. He looked disgusted by the sight of it. Yet, she noted, he did not look the least bit surprised that she was wearing it.
She silently thanked Gabe for finding a way to return it to her. She couldn’t help but think that its presence around her neck was the only thing keeping Rafe from running his fingers over her.
“You know,” he said slowly, “at first I could not imagine what Gabriel saw in you. But now…” he let his voice trail off suggestively. “I see you are far more appealing than I ever realized. Who would have thought?”
Ava cringed at his upside down compliment but continued to ignore him.
She grimaced when she felt his warm breath. He was so close she could feel the heat on her neck. She wondered what the passersby would think if they knew of the insanity of the conversation that was underway only feet from them.
“You and I? We could pass the time together while we waited. I could even make it fun for you, Ava. In fact, I could make it quite enjoyable. Do you know how easy it would be for me to make you believe that I am my brother? Think about that. This misery you have immersed yourself in, and don’t deny it, your eyes betray you, it could be gone. I could make you happy,” he whispered in her ear.
“When Hell freezes over,” Ava replied in a frigid tone.
Rafe laughed. “Spirited and lovely to look at. I definitely misjudged you. It was just a suggestion. It could be rather entertaining because I find you somewhat intriguing.” He paused. “And luckily for both of us, Hell has frozen over. Hasn’t anyone told you? The inner circle is quite mis
erable from what I hear. And as you know, Azael would have had firsthand knowledge. What little is left of one’s soul is sucked out into the icy void.” He shrugged. “Of course, we will have to ask my brother for confirmation on that. If there’s anything left of him to ask. I do think that if he makes it back, there might be very little left of him.”
She didn’t believe him. Grier would have told her. Gabe had spent time in Hell. That was true. But he’d been pulled out and offered deliverance. She refused to believe that his tattered soul would be left behind. It was just another mind trick of Rafe’s. One of a different variety than the type he typically employed.
“What do you want with Gabe?” she demanded.
Rafe was silent, as if weighing his response. “At first, I’ll admit, I was angry. I wanted to make him pay for what he had done. Now, I simply want to speak with him.”
She was not naïve enough to believe for a single second that simply speaking with Gabe was the only thing on his mind. She scoffed. “First you were angry. Now you’re not? You wanted to make him pay. Now you don’t? And how will you feel by the time he returns?” She shook her head in disgust. “Grier warned me that your kind is fickle.”
“We are,” Rafe said. His voice was hard and unapologetic. “It might do you some good to remember that about my brother. Even if he does come back, he will tire of you soon. Your innocence is a novelty. No girl holds his interest for long. He goes through them even faster than I do.”
She clenched her jaw for a moment, not trusting herself to say anything. When she finally did speak, her own words surprised her.
“You killed my mother,” she said in a tone dripping with venomous hatred.
He shrugged. “Did I? There have been so many. They’ve all begun to blend together in my mind.”
The sound of Ava’s palm connecting with Rafe’s cheek echoed loudly, finally drawing the attention of a few people. She ignored them as she got to her feet. “We’re done here. Stay away from me,” she hissed.
He smiled maliciously. “I’m only speaking the truth, Ava. Let’s keep in touch!” he called after her as she disappeared into the crowd.
***
She had driven home in a blind fury. She had desperately hoped that Rafe had left town after Gabe’s disappearance. It would’ve given her peace of mind to know he was gone. She had to wonder if the shadow she’d seen outside of her cabin had been him. She was furious with herself for losing her head. She should have asked if it was him. She wished she would have demanded to know why he was interested in finding Gabe. Although, she was sure he wouldn’t have answered any of her questions, had she asked them.
Just knowing that Rafe was looking for Gabe brought her an inexplicable level of comfort. If Rafe thought Gabe could come back, maybe he could. Maybe he had. She hated to think she was putting any level of blind faith in someone as deplorable as him. Yet, his knowledge of supernatural possibilities far exceeded her own.
For the first time in weeks, she felt her hope soaring and her sorrow being lifted.
“I can’t believe I’m feeling this way because of Rafe,” she muttered to herself in annoyance.
She was rolling a peanut butter concoction into perfectly shaped little globes so that they could be dipped in white chocolate. It was a mindless task and one that she’d found oddly relaxing in the past. But not today. She had three dozen little balls resting on the parchment paper and only another dozen or so to go.
She’d already decorated several trays of truffles, baked a few dozen cookies for dipping into a chocolate glaze and now this mindless task of rolling the peanut butter balls. She was ready to move on to something new.
Typically Becky did the candy making but today, she decided she wanted to spend some time at the front of the store to get some ideas for rearranging before an order of new merchandise came in.
“Ava!” Becky called as she popped her head into the kitchen. “There’s someone here to see you. If you’d like, you can take your break now.” Her slightly wrinkled face broke into a sweet smile. “It’s that handsome gentleman that used to stop by.”
She disappeared as she darted back into the shop, leaving Ava alone with her somersaulting heart.
She whipped off the food prep gloves she’d been wearing and nearly tripped over her own feet as she dashed toward the door. Gabe had stopped by frequently but it couldn’t be him. Or could it?
She had to dart around a display rack of specialty kitchen gadgets that blocked the kitchen door from the sight of the customers. Her eyes scanned the small shop, not seeing any familiar faces until she rounded the neatly arranged display of cookbooks.
Then, the disappointment hit her so hard she may as well have run head first into a wall.
“Expecting someone else?” Dawson asked with a smirk.
Ava’s hand flew up to cover her mouth. She hoped that she could hide at least a little of her frustration. She took a breath and forced a smile. “No. Not at all,” she said. “I wasn’t expecting anyone. I was just…Um, what are you doing here?”
“Molly sent us,” Oliver said as he stepped around the case of gourmet coffee. “She’s at work but she’s craving one of these.” He held up a jumbo-sized chocolate covered pretzel. “And since I offered to get it, she sent the two of us over here on a mission.”
Ava groaned.
“Well, this is off to a good start,” Dawson said with a good-natured smile.
Ava had dated Dawson her junior year and they still remained friends. And while she didn’t want to hurt his feelings, she had a hunch she wasn’t going to like whatever it was that Molly was scheming.
She felt her face scrunch in suspicion. “What?”
Dawson started to laugh. “Yeah, definitely not going well.”
Ava shook her head, feeling a bit contrite. It wasn’t Dawson’s fault that Molly was planning something. “Sorry. What’s going on?”
“Molly sent us to tell you that Tammy’s having a party tomorrow night. I’m supposed to stress that there will be a bonfire because we all know how much you like those. So that means you have to go,” Dawson explained.
“Oh, I do, huh?” Ava asked, a smile twitching her lips.
“You do,” Dawson said as he pulled her into a sideways hug. “Because no one’s seen you since graduation and this fall, everyone will be going their separate ways. So, say you’ll come?”
“I don’t think so,” Ava said, shaking her head.
“Well Molly does think so,” Oliver said, not backing down.
“We’re also supposed to tell you Julia will be there,” Dawson threw out, sounding hopeful.
“And we’re supposed to tell you to save us all some time and agree right now because one way or another, you’re going,” Oliver said in a tone that was obviously meant to cut off any argument she may come up with.
Ava couldn’t help but smile. She might be stubborn but Molly was more so. If she didn’t agree right now, Molly would just bombard her until she did.
“Come on, Ava,” Oliver cajoled. “You’re not going to make me face Molly and tell her that we couldn’t convince you, are you?”
“Fine,” she said with a little sigh. Maybe a distraction was exactly what she needed. “Tell her I’ll go.”
“Good,” Dawson said with a smile. Then his expression turned a little more serious, almost worried. “No one’s seen you around this summer. What’ve you been doing?”
“I’ve been keeping busy. I’ve been fixing up the cabin and working a lot,” she said somewhat defensively.
“Well that’s just plain wrong,” Oliver announced. “It’s summer! You’re supposed to be having some fun!”
Ava laughed. “That’s pretty much what Molly said.”
“Of course she did. She’s a smart girl,” he said with a smirk. “But she’s also really feisty so I better go pay for this so I can get it back to her. See you tomorrow Ava!”
He walked away, leaving Ava with Dawson. He had released his grip on her but Ava felt he w
as still standing awfully close.
“You know, I wouldn’t mind picking you up tomorrow night,” he offered and she immediately flinched. “Not like a date or anything,” he hurriedly added. “It’s just that I’ve wanted to talk to you about something for a while now. But never mind. I’m sure you’ll probably want to ride with Julia or something. Do that girl thing where you always get ready together.”
“Yeah, probably,” Ava said. Though she knew she would be driving herself. That way at least she’d be able to leave when she felt like it.
“What did you want to talk to me about?” she asked.
He hesitated.
She gave him a questioning look and he glanced around the shop. It was fairly empty except for Becky who was sneaking surreptitious glances at them. It was clear from the little smile on her face that she was thinking there might be something going on between the two. “I really don’t want to talk about it here. I’d rather wait until we have some privacy.”
“I’m technically on my break. We could go outside, take a walk or something,” she offered. Dawson had started to look nervous and now she was curious as to why.
He shook his head. “As long as you’ll be at Tammy’s, it can wait. If you do change your mind about a ride, just let me know.”
“You ready?” Oliver asked. “I better get this over to Molly.” He waved the pretzel bag in the air.
“Yeah,” Dawson said. Then he turned to Ava. “See you tomorrow.”
“Yup,” Ava said. “See you.”
Chapter 4
She knew her parents were concerned about her. It was the reason her mom had been begging her to come to dinner. She’d been invited multiple times over the past few weeks, ever since she’d moved out. She had always managed to find a reason not to attend. Today, however, Leah had been insistent. So insistent, in fact, that she threatened to bring the family dinner to Ava if she didn’t agree to show up promptly at six.
