“Go. Now.” Maxine pointed to the door. Love Ben though she did, she thought she might have to start locking her door. “It's my new boss!”
“Oh, no, Max...” Ben held his crossed fingers in the air before mouthing, “I have to head to work. I’m already late. Call me immediately, alright?”
“This is Maxine,” she answered the second Ben closed her bedroom door.
“Hey, Maxine, it’s Lisa from Jeffrey’s office,” the cheery admin’s voice rang out over the line. Clearly, they got an early start at D & D. “How are you today?”
Wrong question to ask her on that morning. And she hadn't even gotten out of bed yet.
“I’m great,” she managed weakly.
“Listen, can you pop in, say around eleven? Just for a quick meeting with Jeffrey?”
Heart in her throat, she struggled to spit the words out. Yes, she could kiss her job buh-bye. “Of course, I can!”
“Wonderful. I’ll put you on his schedule. See you then, Maxine.” The line went dead, and Maxine felt her heart sink to the floor while her stomach continued to turn somersaults. No, she wasn't named in the caption, but Maxine was certain that Jeffrey must have seen that photo in the paper. She couldn't—wouldn't—lose this job. Her entire life at the moment depended upon it.
Without a second to ponder her actions, she crawled out of bed, rushed the three steps into the bathroom and dropped down in front of the toilet. “I hate myself…oh, I hate myself…”
She'd promised her father and Ben—and she'd made a pact with herself—that she'd never do this again. However, as she shoved two fingers down her throat, forcing her hand into her mouth as far as it would go, she needed this release.
There wasn't much in her stomach to vomit as she hadn't eaten since her picnic with Drew the previous afternoon. As she coughed and gagged, her throat muscles constricting around her fingers, she heaved her chest. Acid climbed from her stomach, burning her inside, but she ignored the feeling and dismissed the taste. She had to throw up.
By emptying her belly, the less she would weigh. The thinner she was…the prettier she would be. The prettier she was…
Into the bowl, she dropped her head, allowing that ugly golden orange bile to spit forth from her mouth. She forced so hard that she could feel the tiny veins in her face expanding. But it wasn't enough. She had to do it again.
Before repeating, she looked down at her hand, covered with saliva and the marks of her own teeth. They’d fade before her meeting. They always did.
One more try, but she didn’t manage to vomit much more. She should have had some water first. That always made things easier. Resting her head against the toilet seat, she closed her eyes. There was always that familiar odor of bleach and cleanser that filled her nostrils as she attempted to calm herself down. She felt better already. Now she just had to get through the morning and convince Jeffrey that she was still worthy of her job—even if it meant giving up Drew McKenzie.
Judy always reminded her that no man was more important than her career. She was always so worried that Maxine would find someone and forgo her dreams. She loved Tom immeasurably, but she also wanted her daughter to have a shot at pursuing her calling before she settled down to start a family of her own. With a solid job, she could always support herself even if the relationship failed. Maxine simply couldn't lose this.
Pulling herself up by the sink, she took a good look at herself in the mirror.
Thinner. Prettier. Better.
However, she didn't have time to ponder the repercussions. Drew was calling...and she hadn't even bothered to check her messages yet.
“What’s wrong?” he asked immediately. “Why do you sound so hoarse? Were you crying?”
“No…not crying…”
“Listen, Maxine…about that photo…”
“You know, my life is ruined now,” she rasped.
“How the fuck is your life ruined over one photo, Maxine?” he demanded back, her temper sparking his own.
“I guess it's now all over the internet,” she spat. “Suddenly we seem to be the gossip item of the day.”
In truth, the media’s fascination with his personal life had less to do with his career on Broadway than his role as heir to one of the greatest fortunes in Manhattan’s old society.
“You're so paranoid!” he accused. “The photo is fuzzy at best, and your name isn't in the caption…”
“Well, clearly Jeffrey Dawson saw it and recognized me because I got a call from his office, asking me to meet with him this morning,” she said. “I’m about to lose my job here, Drew…”
“Oh, for crissakes, Maxine, he is my best friend,” Drew reminded her. “He is not going to fire you.”
“He’s your best friend, but he’s my boss!”
“Maxine,” his voice, too, took on a softer tone, “listen to me—”
“No, Drew, listen to me for a minute here,” she demanded. “I have an unexpected meeting with him this morning at eleven, and I can only hope that he hasn’t decided to rescind the job offer because of this damn photo—and because I happen to be gallivanting all over the city with one of their main clients. I need this job, or I’m going to be on the next bus back to Pittsburgh. We can discuss this later today, but right now, I need to get ready.”
“I'm sorry, Maxine,” he whispered. “I lost my...”
“You lost my patience, Drew...”
# # #
Knotted fingers twisting her lap, Maxine couldn't help but to bite her thumb as she sat so very tall and straight in the waiting lounge of Dawson & Donahue. The office was just as big and impressive as she’d remembered it from her internship, with a large reception area that almost resembled a comfortable living room. The assistant sitting behind the large desk offered her water, which she politely refused, then directed her to wait on the large white sectional couch with bright orange throw pillows fluffed on every cushion.
Over and over, she ran the scenarios through her mind, and none of them fared for her benefit. She vividly imagined Jeffrey, his smile warm but tinged with sadness, regretfully telling her that they no longer had a position available for her at the agency.
Drew had called, e-mailed and texted too many times for Maxine to even count, but she refused to return a single message. She had her own realities to deal with, and she had to remain calm regardless of the outcome.
Twenty minutes had already passed, and with every second, Maxine’s anxieties escalated. However, if she lost this job, she'd simply just have to find another. She couldn't allow one bad experience to shatter her dreams. She had promised Judy that she’d make a life for herself in New York. Nothing could stop her.
When Jillian stepped out to greet Maxine, she was all smiles once again.
“You had a good weekend?” Jillian asked, and Maxine was quick to note the knowing look in her eyes.
“Yes, Jillian,” she managed to say. “It was a good weekend.” The best weekend of my life followed by the worst Monday ever, she thought.
“Come on back,” Jillian said and gently took Maxine’s arm to guide her along. “It’s been a crazy day already. We got stuck on a conference call with London for a show from the West End that we’ll be working next year, so I’m sorry we’re a little late. But Jeffrey’s ready to see you now.”
Back turned to the door to his office, Jeffrey—a tall, handsome man with wispy blonde hair, chiseled jaw and deep brown eyes—sat facing the windows with the phone cradled between his shoulder and his ear. Sensing Maxine’s presence, he swiveled around and smiled, holding up one finger to let her know that he wouldn’t be long then motioning for her to take a seat.
She quite liked Jeffrey's office, expansive but soothing with dim lamps around the room and two overstuffed leather loungers in front of his desk. On the wall in between the windows hung a framed, autographed poster of Cher. For the CEO's office, it was hardly a threatening atmosphere.
“So how are we doing, Maxine?” he said, rising from his desk to greet her w
ith a hug. An embrace. Maybe he wasn’t planning on canning her ass before she even started. “Welcome back, and we’re so glad you’re joining us next week.”
Her smile was cordial, and she nodded simply. “And thank you for the offer, Jeffrey. I’m very excited about this job.”
“Good! But we all know you’ll do us proud, Max,” he said. “We were all very impressed with your work during your internship. I think you’re a great fit here, and you work so well with Jillian.”
“She taught me a lot over that summer.”
“And you’ll learn so much more, too,” he said, rifling through a stack of papers on his desk to find a file folder. “Now…I have some forms for you to fill out—basic new hire stuff. And just wanted to talk to you about one little thing…”
“Drew McKenzie…” she said without further thought. As the words fell from her lips, her face froze with embarrassment.
“How did you know?” he chuckled. “Yeah, we all saw that pic this morning.”
“Jeffrey, I’m sorry…I had no intention…I…”
“Max, please,” he brushed her off. “I'm sure he told you that we go far back. Fifteen years now. And I'm quite happy for both of you, if this works out.”
“Thanks…” I think…
“I just want you to know that I talked to Jillian, and we just think it’s best if we keep you on other clients—not Drew.”
Relief flooded her, and Maxine wanted nothing more than to jump out of her seat and kiss that man right on the lips. However, even though he was gay, Drew with his jealous streak might construe that as cheating on him with his best friend.
“Oh, that’s…that’s fine!” she insisted. “D & D has so many wonderful accounts to work on that I’m sure I’ll be happy…”
Fuck. She hoped that Jeffrey didn’t know about Drew’s affinity for all things BDSM. Likely, though, he did. She could only hope that he’d brush that thought away while she was under his employ.
“Eh! Drew’s kinda boring,” Jeffrey said with a wink and a dismissive wave. “But don't tell him I said—”
However, their gentle conversation was thwarted when his office door swung open with a vengeance and the ruckus outside trickled in. “He’s in there with Maxine—you can’t just…”
“Jesus, Mack! Can’t you see I’m in a meeting here?” Jeffrey spat.
“Don’t fucking fire her,” Drew pleaded. “I’ll pay her fucking salary myself, but don’t fucking drop her because of my stupid fucking ass…”
How he could just barge in and issue demands left her sick to the pit of her stomach. At that moment, Maxine wanted to throw up again. But she couldn't fight that damn gnawing need for him as he took a seat on the arm of the chair next to her. Dressed in a pair of jeans and navy blue sweater, his casual even made her tremble.
“I’m not firing her, you asshole! But she’s not allowed to work with you.”
“We’ll see about that,” Drew said.
“There does exist a code of ethics in public relations, Mr. McKenzie,” Jeffrey said. “And I’m pretty sure that dating your publicist is probably a bad idea…”
“We’re not da—”
Drew’s hand clamped around her mouth immediately. “I’ll make that determination,” he told her then turned back toward Jeffrey. “Just as long as you’re keeping her…”
“This is what you’ll be putting up with,” Jeffrey teased her. “I’m just giving you a fair warning, Maxine…”
“Duly noted…”
“Can I take her home now?” Drew asked.
“Please do,” Jeffrey said, “just so that you’ll get the hell out of my office, Mack.”
As she stood up from her seat, Maxine reached out her hand to shake with Jeffrey. “Thank you again. I'm looking forward to this.”
“We’ll see you next Monday, kiddo, but leave him at home…” he teased.
“Dickhead…”
“Don’t start with me, motherfucker…”
For the first time since she'd been so rudely awakened that morning with all of this drama, she had to laugh. Those two reminded her so much of her relationship with Ben—only Maxine didn't swear.
“And your new hire paperwork,” Jeffrey passed the folder to her. “Looking forward, Maxine.”
“Thanks again, Jeffrey.”
Silence, however, fell between Maxine and Drew as they headed toward the elevator. There was so much yet to be said of their little spat that morning, but her future place of employment seemed the least appropriate venue in which to discuss it.
What Maxine didn’t realize, though, was in that quiet time, Drew took the chance to study her face—the dark circles that make-up couldn’t even hide, the redness in her eyes. He was certain that under that blush, her skin had faded to a lighter shade of pale. He had to talk to her.
“You’re not looking well this morning,” he said once the elevator closed. They were alone in the car. “What’s wrong, Maxine? You were that upset over a paparazzi photo?”
“Are you dismissing my emotions here?” she accused. “Yes, I was that upset.”
“Fine, and I apologize,” he said. “But there's something else going on here. Something that's starting to scare the shit out of me here. And we need to talk about it. After we discuss your pissy little attitude with me this morning.”
“OK, I realize Jeffrey is your dearest confidante,” Maxine said. “But you can't just play God with my job like this, Drew. You said you’d never interfere with my career.”
“Trust me, Maxine,” he said, placing his hands on her shoulders and turning her to look into his eyes. “That's the first lesson you need to learn here.”
The elevator opened out to the vast lobby, and he gentled his hand against her back to guide her toward the revolving doors and toward his sedan where Lou was waiting patiently.
“Please come with me so that we can have a conversation.” Moving aside, he opened the car door, then added, “Between two adults.”
She didn't answer but acquiesced by sliding into the backseat. Once Drew had belted her in, she asked, “Where are you taking me?”
“Somewhere private,” he said. “Is Ben home right now?”
“Nope—he’s at work.”
“Mind if we go to your apartment then?”
Waving her arm in sluggish agreement, Maxine said, “Lead the way.”
Chapter Seventeen
Maxine dropped her bag by the door then put her hands up in the air as if in protest. “First of all, before we even begin to talk, I want to remind you that I have already had the worst day, and I am not in the mood for World War III. Otherwise, you can leave through the door where you just made your entrance.”
“Sassy,” he said, his now playful eyes darting over the dip in her white blouse and the curve of her body in that tight black skirt. “Must be the only child in you, Maxine.”
“Don't forget it, Mack,” she said and kicked off her heels.
“I wish you'd leave those on, little one,” he said, his smile teasing.
“My feet hurt, and you're here to talk—not to play,” she reminded him as she made her way toward the kitchen. “Now what can I get you to drink? Some juice? Water? A beer?”
“I'm fine,” he said. “I have a lesson with my vocal coach this afternoon. I’d rather not show up three sheets to the proverbial wind…”
Laughing to herself when she opened the fridge, Maxine reached for a beer herself, musing how she didn't necessarily care about having the same clarity she needed the prior afternoon. When she returned to Drew in the dining room, she stopped only inches away from him and looked up into the storm clouds of his blue eyes.
“Just in case Ben decides to come home for lunch, why don't we go talk in my room?” she suggested. “Just talking—no…fooling…around…”
“After you,” he bowed to Maxine, then followed her down the hallway toward the bedroom. He was quick to note the blush of her cheeks as she rushed around collecting the clothes that were strewn on th
e floor once again, likely in her haste to get ready that morning. “You need to be more organized, little one. And you should probably have some lunch before you drink that...”
“Drew, enough about food already!”
“Maxine, you listen to me now,” he said and circled his arms around her so that she had no choice but to face him. “You have an eating disorder. I’ve worked with enough actresses over the years, and I see all the signs—your face, your bones, your ribcage. Those dark circles under your bloodshot eyes—your voice on the phone this morning—clearly you’re forcing yourself to throw up.”
The accusation brought a rush of tremors to Maxine's entire body. Nausea gnawed at her stomach, forcing her to face the ugly reality of her own worst kept secret. Drew knew. He'd figured her out. With so much turmoil in his life simmering to a boil, she couldn't imagine that he could have any intentions of developing a romance with someone who carried just as much baggage as he.
First, though, Maxine had to dodge his observation as she had with everyone else in her life. Lying was her only possible escape.
“Th-that’s not t-true, Drew,” she stammered. “That’s a…that’s just not…”
“Listen, Maxine, if we’re going to have a relationship here built on trust, this is a true concern to me,” he said. “I care enough about you to address it. And I care enough to get you some help. I’ll find you a doctor this week.”
“I’ve had help!” she screamed so loud that she could feel her throat burn. Oh, how she loathed discussing this…problem. She even found it difficult to talk about with Ben. The last person she expected to be having any sort of conversation on the subject was Drew. Lips quivering, she finally offered him the answer that she hoped would satisfy any further curiosities. “I was in treatment over the summer. And it obviously didn’t work…”
“Oh, my God, little one…” he said and pulled her close to his chest to hold her as tightly as he could. “Oh, my God…”
WEAKENED: The Manhattan Bound Series Book One Page 20
