by Albany, Cara
Tariq groaned. "But, last night..."
"Was a mistake," Zoe interrupted, her voice flat and emphatic.
Tariq froze, stunned into incredulity. There was a long silence. The words sank into him, their poison eating away at Tariq's hopes.
Zoe's gaze drifted away from Tariq, and he already felt he was starting to lose her. Slowly but surely. Her reaction in the shower suddenly made sense. She'd been planning this all along. Leaving? He couldn't let that happen.
He took a step forward, and Zoe's eyes widened with a sharp warning. Tariq halted. She was only feet away from him, but it could as easily have been miles.
"For how long?" Tariq asked.
Zoe frowned. "As long as I need," she stated.
Tariq sighed. "It doesn't have to be this way," he said. "You need some time. You can have all the time you need here, in the palace."
Zoe shook her head. "I can't think straight here," she replied. "This is your place. It's where you belong. Not me."
Tariq moved closer. This time, she didn't react, merely watched him advance with a grim certainty in her eyes.
"So much has happened. I don't know what to think anymore," Zoe said.
There was emotion in her voice, and he sensed a chance, a last opportunity to persuade her.
Tariq closed the last remaining space between them and seized Zoe by the shoulders. She didn't respond to his touch, didn't even try to resist. She felt loose in his grasp. He gazed into her eyes.
"I won't let you go, Zoe. Not after everything that has happened," he stated, filling his voice with every ounce of defiance he could summon.
Zoe stared back at Tariq, her gaze flatly determined and unmoving.
Tariq gritted his teeth. He wanted to crush her lips, take possession of her, certain that if he did so, she would succumb, would submit. The fierceness of his emotions must have been written on his face, because he saw her eyes widen slightly, saw her face flush involuntarily.
"Do you realize what we have?" Tariq demanded. "This is not a game anymore, Zoe. This marriage is real, whether you like it or not."
A flare of indignation appeared in her eyes. "This is an arrangement, Tariq. You know that. You got to keep your promise. Retain your sense of honor."
Tariq growled and pulled her hard against his body. "I don't care about that. All I care about is having you. Don't you understand that? My honor is nothing without you by my side, Zoe," he murmured, his voice shaking with a ferocious energy.
His breathing had quickened, and he could see that he was affecting Zoe. Her resolve was crumbling. He was sure of it. He was near to claiming victory. He could still pull Zoe back from the precipice.
But then, suddenly, Zoe wrenched herself free of his grasp. Tariq stared at her, disbelieving. Surely he wasn't about to lose her yet again.
With a visceral power shaking every nerve in his body Tariq roared. "No! You will not leave me again, Zoe. I forbid it," he declared.
Zoe's brows furrowed and she stared, incredulous, at Tariq. "You forbid it!" she exclaimed. She gaped at Tariq with open-mouthed astonishment.
Tariq's breathing was harsh. He stared at Zoe waiting for her answer, even if he already knew what it would be.
Zoe suppressed a sardonic laugh. "You don't forbid anything with me, Tariq. Don't you know that?"
Tariq's shoulders tightened, and he swallowed. He could feel the adrenalin racing through his body. She was facing him down.
Zoe turned away from Tariq and took a few paces. Then she spun, and he could see the grim determination in her eyes. How suddenly things had changed, he thought. The pleasures of the previous night seemed already to be fading into distant memory.
"Please arrange for me to be driven back to the city," she stated in a flat, even voice.
Tariq felt the madness in him start to subside. His pulse was still racing, but there was a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. He knew that feeling, had felt it a long time ago.
After a long pause, Tariq sighed. "I'll make sure your things are brought to the car. I'll drive you back. You can stay in one of my apartments in the city."
Zoe quirked an ironic brow at Tariq. "One of your apartments?"
"Don't worry. You'll have your privacy. I give you my word," he said. He peered at her, awaiting her response to his offer. She examined his features for a few moments. She knew that his word was his bond, that she could rely on it. At least there was that, he told himself.
Zoe considered what he had offered. Her eyes shifted from side to side. Finally, she nodded. "Okay. I accept," she said. "That's gracious of you," she added, smiling weakly.
Tariq nodded. At least that was one small victory he could hang onto for the moment.
Zoe sighed and started toward the door. She turned and looked back at Tariq. There was a sudden softness in her gaze, as if she had realized what she had done to them both.
"I'm sorry, Tariq," she murmured.
And then she opened the door and walked out on him one more time.
****
The drive back to Qazhar City seemed to go one forever, although it really only lasted about an hour. But, it was turning out to be the longest hour of Zoe's life. She sat up front, next to Tariq as he raced the sports car at top speed along the narrow strip of road. Zoe could see the city in the distance.
She replayed the details of their confrontation, asking herself if she really knew what she was doing. Was she turning her back on Tariq one last time? Did she really think that she could end this marriage so easily?
What were they going to do about the marriage arrangement? Maybe they could keep up the pretense; perhaps they could maintain the illusion of affection in public. But, could they resist the obvious desire that they felt for each other in private?
She glanced across at Tariq. His gaze was fixed resolutely on the road ahead. What about the future that lay ahead for them both? Had she finally put an end to that, once and for all?
It certainly felt like it. Of course, it was her own doing; it was what she wanted. Wasn't it?
Tariq's reaction to her demands for time to think had shown her just how much she meant to him.
As if she had ever had any doubts about that!
It was her fault, and she knew it. She was still running from the pain of the past; still hoping that the wound would heal and that she could go on with the life she had had without Tariq. She had tried to use Tariq, sought to fix herself by using him in an utterly selfish manner.
Tariq deserved better than that. He deserved better than her, Zoe thought.
Was that the reason she was trying to run from him again? Could she really claim that she was thinking of Tariq by doing all of this?
She sighed audibly and saw Tariq turn and look at her.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
Zoe nodded. "I'm fine."
"You let me know if you need anything, okay?" Tariq said.
"I will."
"You can have this apartment for as long as you need it," he said.
"I can probably do some work from there," she explained. "I can liaise with my assistants. I'm sure they're dying to hear about the honeymoon."
Zoe saw him smile. "Just don't give them too many details," he joked.
How could he be like that, she wondered. Given what she was about to do, he had every right to rage against her, demand that she halt this course of action. But, he wasn't doing any of that. Since they had left the palace, a curious calm had settled on Tariq, as if he had simply accepted her choice. But, for how long would he remain patient? Questions would be asked; his family would want to know what was going on. Did Tariq intend to widen the scope of their phony marriage? How many lies could he sustain?
They arrived in the city and Tariq parked outside a tall, ultramodern apartment block.
Zoe gazed up at the building. "Where is your place?"
Tariq twisted and followed her gaze. "The top floor. Where else did you think it would be?" he asked with a grin.
"
Of course," she admitted with a nod. "The penthouse. It would have to be the top floor."
Tariq nodded. He stepped out of the car and came around to her side, opening the door for Zoe. She stepped out. Tariq grabbed her bags from the car and quirked a brow at Zoe.
"Well. Are you ready?"
Zoe nodded.
Tariq cocked his head. "Follow me," he said.
As she walked behind him, toward the building she wondered if this was a temporary parting, or something much more permanent.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Zoe awoke alone as she had done every morning for the past six weeks.
Had it really been that long? The weeks had passed in a haze of longing mingled with regret. But, she'd had no choice. She'd been telling herself that every day she had spent living in this luxurious penthouse.
She gazed around the sumptuous bedroom and felt the familiar ache in her middle. Every morning she had woken up, she had asked herself the same question.
Where was Tariq?
As quickly as that question had risen in her mind, she had driven it away with equal speed. There was no use thinking of Tariq. She had too much work to do today; calls to make; emails to answer; face to face video conferencing. Tariq had kept his word and had bailed out the business, paying off the outstanding debts, keeping the predators at bay for good.
Zoe had made a new start, but it had been a mixed blessing. Every day that had passed without Tariq by her side had been a trial, a test of her character. She knew she wanted him, but she also knew that going back to Tariq might ruin both of them. And, she wasn't prepared to do that.
The past few weeks had been all about keeping busy. Zoe's assistants in America understood that she would be running things from Qazhar, at least for a while. Zoe had given them a lame excuse about the need for her to be based in the region so that she could build connections for future expansion into other kinds of event planning.
Zoe sat up in bed and felt her stomach tumble, a mild nausea taking sudden hold of her. She frowned and laid a hand across her stomach. Living in the penthouse, alone these past few weeks, cooking hadn't been one of Zoe's main priorities. Tariq had made sure that a private chef arrived twice a day to cook Zoe meals. At first, she had felt awkward with the entire arrangement, but the young woman who arrived at the exact same hours each day had turned out to be an excellent cook.
Once again, a wave of nausea swept over Zoe, stronger this time. One more forceful rush of sensation in her gut told her that she had to get to the bathroom. And quickly.
Zoe leaped out of bed and dashed to the bathroom. She made it just in time before violent spasms overtook her and she emptied her heaving stomach, retching into the bathroom bowl.
Zoe sank onto the bathroom floor, sweat beading her forehead. She gasped, trying to get her breath back. It had happened again, she thought. Anxiety clawed at her heart. Just like yesterday morning. Once could be put down to food poisoning, or at a minimum one bad meal. But, twice could only mean something more serious. Something much more significant.
Zoe groaned and rolled her eyes. Of course. It could only mean one thing.
She stood and washed her face. Gazing at herself in the mirror, she saw a tiredness there that couldn't simply be explained by overwork. It had to be a combination of missing Tariq and the other new problem she was now so sure of.
The tone of the electronic security system rang. Someone was at the door. This early?
And then Zoe remembered. She had arranged to have breakfast with Tariq's sister, Aliyah. In an effort to fend off some of the questions being asked about how much time Tariq and Zoe were spending together, Zoe had arranged to meet with Aliyah and reassure her that all was well between Zoe and Tariq.
Zoe fussed with her hair and grunted with frustration. What would Aliyah think?
Zoe went back into the bedroom, pulled on a gown and raced to the intercom by the door. She buzzed the door letting Aliyah into the private lift that would bring her up to the top floor.
While she was waiting for Aliyah, Zoe threw on a simple, plain blue dress and slid her feet into a pair of flat shoes.
The lift door opened, and Aliyah stepped out. The young woman looked elegant and radiant, as usual. She wore a cream knee-length dress and low heels. A loose, gossamer thin head covering was draped across her luxuriant dark hair. As usual, Aliyah's smile lit up the room when she entered.
"Zoe! It's so nice to see you," Aliyah said.
She came to Zoe and hugged her. Aliyah gazed inquisitively into Zoe's eyes. Zoe saw Aliyah frown slightly. "Are you feeling okay?" she asked looking suddenly worried.
Zoe waved a dismissive hand and turned away from Aliyah, eager to hide anything that would give Aliyah a clue to what had just happened. "I'm fine. There's just been so much work to do lately. You know the time difference between here and America means I don't get regular hours."
Aliyah pursed her lips disapprovingly. "You mustn't let work take over your life like that. After all, you are still, strictly speaking, a newlywed bride."
"It's been nearly two months. Tariq and I are hardly newlyweds, Aliyah," she retorted good-naturedly.
"Speaking of my brother, how is he doing?" Aliyah asked.
Zoe led Aliyah over to the kitchen area of the apartment and took a seat at the breakfast bar. Aliyah sat down opposite Zoe awaiting a reply. What was she going to tell Aliyah? I haven't seen Tariq for weeks, Aliyah? He and I don't live together? Oh, and this marriage has all been a sham?
Zoe knew she couldn't say any of that. The truth would come out eventually. She and Tariq would have to find a way of breaking the news to everyone. All in good time, she told herself.
"He's been very busy, Aliyah," Zoe said. "You know what he's like."
Aliyah nodded. "I know my brother. Only too well. Even if he likes to try and keep all his secrets to himself," she said rolling her eyes.
Now, what had Aliyah meant by that, Zoe asked herself. Did Aliyah suspect something?
Aliyah glanced around the kitchen. "Where is he?" she asked bluntly.
"Oh, he left early this morning," Zoe blurted out, sensing immediately that she hadn't sounded at all convincing. "I think he had something to attend to at the palace."
Aliyah smiled politely. "Ah. The palace. You must find this place quite a change from the palace," Aliyah said glancing back into the main living area of the penthouse.
Zoe quirked a brow at Aliyah. "The palace is so huge. I found it quite overwhelming at first. I'm much more used to a place like this. And, it's been a good place for me to run the business from."
"How is that going?"
"Tariq's been really supportive. We agreed that I would continue with the business after we married. It was so important to my father. I didn't want to just let it whither away."
"And you don't mind being stuck up here. In the clouds?"
Zoe grinned. "It's a penthouse apartment. What can I say? It's incredibly comfortable, and convenient for shopping."
Aliyah's eyes brightened. "Speaking of shopping. We can do some after our breakfast. What do you say?"
"I didn't know you liked that kind of thing, Aliyah," Zoe replied.
Aliyah squinted at Zoe. "My brothers are always telling me I spend too much time shopping. But, they have their cars and horses. I have my shoes and shopping."
Zoe laughed. Aliyah was more modern than Zoe could ever have believed. The time she had spent in the young woman's company had gone a long way to making the last few weeks bearable.
"So, where are we going for breakfast?" Zoe asked.
"Well, there is a wonderful restaurant close by where you can enjoy something really special," Aliyah said enthusiastically. "They make the most wonderful egg dishes."
Zoe felt a sudden twisting in her stomach at the mention of food. She saw Aliyah frown at the sight of Zoe's pale features.
"Are you okay?" Aliyah asked.
Zoe tried to nod, but then a sudden surge in her middle had her running for the b
athroom. She repeated what she had done a short while before, only, this time, the sounds of her retching were being heard by a very curious listener.
Zoe emerged from the bathroom. Aliyah came to Zoe and laid a hand on her shoulder. "Are you sick? We must get you to a doctor," Aliyah said.
"It's nothing, Aliyah. I'll be fine," Zoe said.
"No. No. Our family physician must check you out. Just to make sure you're okay."
Zoe's shoulders sank. "Really, Aliyah. I don't want to put anyone to any trouble."
Aliyah's eyes were filled with concern and kindness. "Please, Zoe. It will put my mind at rest. And, I'm sure Tariq will be worried. Does he know about this?" Aliyah asked.
"About what?" Zoe replied suddenly fearful that Aliyah had guessed what was really going on.
"About your food poisoning," Aliyah said.
Zoe sighed, momentarily relieved. "No. He doesn't know."
Aliyah took out her cellphone and dialed a number.
Zoe heard Aliyah speaking in her own language.
Well, that was that, Zoe told herself. She'd soon know the truth, one way or the other.
****
"How is Zoe?" Zayed asked Tariq.
Tariq flinched and continued tightening the saddle strap on his horse.
"She's fine," Tariq muttered hesitantly.
"Fine. That's it?" Zayed asked.
They were in the stables of the polo club. Tariq was getting ready to go out on the field for a practice session with some of the other players. For some reason, Zayed had turned up out of the blue. Now, his brother was asking some awkward questions, and Tariq couldn't wait to get out on the field so that he could avoid having to bend the truth any longer. His brother deserved better than a series of weak lies about Tariq's marriage.
"I heard that you two are in that apartment of yours in town," Zayed said.
"Who told you that?" Tariq said starting to lead his horse out of the stall.
Zayed stepped back allowing Tariq and the horse to make their way out into the narrow passage between stalls.
