by Erin Osborne
“What now?” I ask, wrapping my arm around Callie’s shoulders. “This is the one we want. I want it as soon as possible. Make it happen.”
“Well, you don’t know the cost or anything else,” he says, making it sound like I don’t have a pot to piss in, much less buy this property.
“Didn’t ask any of that did I? I want this closed on by the end of the fuckin’ week. It’s already Wednesday. Make it happen or I go to your boss,” I tell him, letting him know that I have no problem going over his fucking head to get what I want.
“It might take more than two days to close on this,” he tries to say, squaring his shoulders and acting tough as Callie turns around.
“That’s a damn lie and you know it,” she says, shocking the shit out of me. “This property is up for sale before it goes to auction. The previous owners filed for bankruptcy and the bank wants to sell it before then. Bear’s offering to pay the money for it and wants it closed on. Do I need to call the bank right now?”
I laugh my ass off as the realtor drops his jaw in shock. Guess he thought my girl was nothing more than arm candy. I hate even thinking that shit knowing how she was raised. The entire truth hasn’t come out just yet, but I can see it happening soon. Before I know it, the asshole is murmuring that he’ll make it happen and give me an update later on today or tomorrow morning before running to his car and leaving us alone. Now that he’s gone, I keep my arm around Callie and walk toward the building to see what we’re working with.
The building looks like it was going to be a workshop of some sort. There’re five bay doors that were never finished. And the building is long enough for all the guys to work in here comfortably. Along with having more than enough space to pull in larger vehicles and close the doors behind them when it’s storming out or chilly. As we walk in the building farther, I see that the office is larger than the old one and Callie is already picturing where she can put everything in here. The look is really nice to see on her face and another thing I want to make happen every single day.
“I think this place has a lot of potential,” I say, walking up behind Callie and looking out the holes in the building for windows.
“I agree. It’s going to be great building here,” she answers distractedly. I’m not sure what’s on her mind right now, but there’s a slight change to her demeanor.
“Let’s get out of here. We’ll stop by the clubhouse before headin’ home,” I tell her, wanting to figure out how I can put that smile back on her face.
I lead Callie back out to the bike and watch as she quickly braids her hair before sliding the helmet on over her head. I straddle my girl and then wait for her to climb on behind me. She slides on behind me and I can feel her sliding to get closer. Unlike the other times, Callie slides as close as she can get, wraps her hands around me, and then she lays her head against my back. While she has always done this, there’s a different vibe this time. She seems to want to ride but whatever is going on in her head is making her pull away from me. This isn’t good at all. I’m going to have to figure out where she went that has her pulling away.
By the time we get to the clubhouse, Callie still hasn’t gotten out of her own head. She slides off the bike before I back it into my spot in line. While I’m shutting it down and kicking down the kick stand, she takes her helmet off and undoes the braid in her hair. I wait until she hands it over to me so I can place it on the seat before leading her into the clubhouse. There’s a new and nervous energy surrounding her as she tries to take in every single detail about the clubhouse. The place isn’t even exciting her anymore like I know it would’ve at any other time. Maybe I should’ve asked her if she wanted to go home instead of bringing her here.
Callie
The last few weeks have been different for me. There’s only one man that I’ve ever lived with and that was my dad. Bear living here with me for right now is different in a good way. We’ve had time to ourselves where we talk and get to know one another a little better. Every new detail that I learn about the man only makes me want to be with him more and more. I don’t know how to talk to him about this though. I’m pretty sure that there’s something there on his behalf too. At least from all the glances and growls that I’ve heard when the guys are around.
When I walked into the room the morning after I got out of the hospital, I heard Bear groan and looked at him to see what was wrong with him. There was a look in his eyes that made me shiver and break out in goose bumps as he devoured me with his eyes. As I looked down at myself, I realized that I was only wearing a pair of panties and a tank top. Oops! I’ve been so used to being alone in the house that I wasn’t thinking about changing when I made my way to the kitchen for my much-needed caffeine. Now I try to at least wear a pair of shorts when I leave my room, but he still growls at anyone that looks at me.
When we met with the realtor, I could feel the tension rolling off of him. It was like he instantly hated the man on site. While I’ll agree that I didn’t like the way he only talked to me and ignored Bear and that he gave me a weird feeling, I don’t think that Bear needed to be as rude to him as he was. But that’s what I get when dealing with the man. It’s like he wants to protect me and keep me rolled in a ball of bubble wrap so that no one hurts me again. I’m not made of china and I won’t break. Yeah, I got hurt when the garage blew up, but at least I wasn’t inside and I’m still breathing. And I know that everyone got scared because I’ve seen more of the guys in Satan’s Anarchy then I ever thought I would.
As we pulled up to the last property to look at, my breath caught in my chest before I gasped. I know that Bear heard me as I all but jumped off his bike so that I could get a better look at the property. The land surrounding the building is huge and there’s so much that can be done here. All of the things that Bear has told me he wants to do will work here. Looking back at him, I watch him nod his head and know that he wants this place too.
Once we get the realtor to leave and begin to look around the building that’s already been started, I can see Bear’s eyes get wide with all the potential that already stands before us. I don’t let my emotions get the best of me until we’re standing in the office though. As I look out where the window will be put in, I can’t help but think that Bear will get everything that he wants. An even better garage where he can expand his business and a place in the club with his friends. His life will be full and there won’t be any room there for me. If I’ve learned anything the past few weeks, it’s that I want to be a part of his life. No matter how bad I want to be more than friends with him, I know that I’ll take whatever I can get.
Now, we’re at the clubhouse and I’m trying to take everything in without showing the emotion flowing through me. In all reality, I just want to go home and get away from everyone. It’s like I’m on an emotion overload and I don’t know how to process everything that I feel. When I’m alone at night it seems to be the worst because I know Bear is in the house and I want to go to him. Unfortunately, there are two problems with that. The first is that I don’t think he wants me to go to him. Secondly, I wouldn’t know what to do if I did go to him.
“There she is!” Grave hollers over as we walk through the door of the clubhouse.
See, I’ve been so lost in my own head that I didn’t even realize that Bear was leading me inside with his hand on the small of my back. Looking at everyone sitting around the bar looking room, I see the guys that I’ve met, a few new faces, and women in various stages of undress. My eyes about bulge out of my head as I take in the scene of these women walking or strutting around without a care in the world. I’ve never seen anything like it in my life. I’m definitely not judging them; what they choose to do with their lives is their own business. I just don’t understand why they’d flash their bodies to anyone walking in the clubhouse.
“It’s okay, sweetheart,” Renegade says, walking up to us from where he was sitting with Grave and a few other men I haven’t met yet. “It’s not usually like this in here, but you�
��re here late enough that the guys are ready to blow off some steam.”
“Does every woman walking around here need to be half naked to do so?” I ask, not sure if that’s what I’m supposed to be doing right now.
“Fuck no!” Bear explodes, his face turning red and I don’t understand what I did to make him so angry at me.
Before anyone else can say a word, I watch as a girl walks up behind Bear and wraps her arms around his shoulders. My heart shatters into a million pieces as I realize that this must be why Bear hasn’t tried to do anything with me. But, if he’s been with me every single day for weeks, why hasn’t he moved in with his girlfriend? Why haven’t I ever seen her around him? So, I stay where I am and watch the situation unfold before my eyes.
“Where have you been baby?” she asks, her voice sounding sexy and sultry in a way I’ve never heard before.
“Who you callin’ baby? Rusty, we aren’t anythin’ and I told you I’d never be with you. There’s more than one brother here for you to go have fun with so run along,” Bear says, pulling her hands off of him as he steps closer to me and farther away from the red head that’s trying to capture his attention.
My body goes stiff as I wait for the abuse to start. Renegade turns his attention toward me, and I can feel other eyes on me as well. The longer I stand here, the more confused I become that nothing is happening to this woman. Instead, Bear walks over to the bar and grabs a beer from the man standing behind it and acts like nothing has happened. Renegade leads me over to the table after hollering for someone to bring him a beer and me a soda or water. At this point, I really don’t care what I have to drink though.
“So, did you guys find somethin’ today?” a man I don’t know asks Bear as he walks over to us.
“We did,” he answers shortly as he takes a seat while I remain standing. “Guys, this is Callie. Callie this is Ryder, Doc, and Hawk.”
I nod my head to the men in front of me. What the hell is it with these guys and being hot as sin? I swear it must be some sort of requirement to join the club or something. The one that Bear motioned to when he said Hawk hasn’t taken his eyes off of me since I walked through the door. Even if my back was to him, I could feel eyes on me and I’m positive it was him. So, I shift awkwardly from one foot to the other as I stand behind Bear’s chair. There’s not another female in here that is giving me the impression that I can begin a conversation with them as I look around again.
When my eyes land on the couch I see a woman’s head bobbing up and down while the man next to her has his head thrown back and his arms stretched across the back of the couch. At the same time, another man sits down behind her and I watch as his hand disappears under the short as hell skirt that she’s wearing. Turning my head, I see Grave watching me now too. He’s trying to see if I’m going to go running from the building right now at the things that I’m seeing around me. He’s got another thing coming. I may not have ever seen anyone act like this in public, but it’s not going to send me running for the hills either.
Turning my attention back to the rest of the room. I pay attention to the details. There’s a bar that takes up most of the space along the wall to my right. An enormous flag that has the same picture that’s on the back of Grave’s cut hangs on the wall in the middle of two sets of shelves containing alcohol. There’re a few other pictures hanging back there but I can’t tell what they’re of right now. Behind the bar I can see a hallway with a few doors. Around me there’s a bunch of tables that are sporadically placed around the huge room. On the left side of the room sit a few couches that look worn from use, three different TVs that are big enough to rival a screen in a movie theatre, and a few chairs. Behind all of that, going toward another hallway, I notice a few pool tables. There’s space between them so that the guys playing at each table don’t get in one another’s way. The walls of this room are painted in a dark grey and I try to make out what the pictures are that line the walls where the TVs aren’t located.
Before I can look around anymore, I watch as another man comes out of the hallway by the pool tables and looks around. He sees a girl standing by the bar and immediately heads over to her. They capture my attention and I watch to see what’s going to happen. Especially when I see the scowl on the guy’s face.
“Nails, I thought I told you I wanted the kitchen clean?” he asks, stopping before he’s directly in her face.
“I was on my way there now Chains,” she answers, not looking worried in the least about him hurting her. In the meantime, I can feel my entire body go rigid and I begin to shake on behalf of her.
“Well, I told you a few hours ago to get it done. No more cock for you until it’s sparklin’,” he says, turning to lean against the bar as he watches her run toward the direction he just came from. “You all heard that. No more cock for her until she can learn how to listen and not take her sweet ass time gettin’ shit done.”
As soon as he’s done talking, Chains turns and grabs the shot and beer that were placed on the bar top behind him. He chugs both before turning his attention in our direction. When he notices my reaction to the scene before me, I swear I could hear him use a few choice swear words and turns his back to me. His reaction causes the men sitting before me to turn and see what had him reacting like that. I feel someone’s hand reach out for my leg and I shrink in on myself. I’m so lost in the memories of how I was treated when I messed up, even a simple infraction such as not wiping down my spot at the table after I was done with a meal, that I lose focus of the room and men surrounding me.
I can hear someone trying to get my attention, but I can’t snap out of my memories as they continue to flash on a loop in my mind. At some point, I suddenly feel as if I’m floating away. Whatever is going on around me has vanished and the only thing I can hear are my mother’s screams and insults as I continue to mess up my life in her eyes. I know that I can’t take it anymore and a blackness surrounds me, pulling me under and wrapping me in a blanket of comfort as the memories begin to vanish replaced with nothingness.
“Callie, baby, are you okay?” I hear as my eyes begin to flutter open.
I look around and don’t recognize where I’m at. Before I can begin to lose control, I turn and see Bear, Renegade, Grave, Psycho, Smokey, and the guy introduced as Doc earlier. They’re all looking at me with concern and fear lacing their eyes. What the hell is going on? I ask myself as I try to remember what happened. All of a sudden, I remember the man telling the girl that she was supposed to be cleaning the kitchen. The overwhelming fear that enveloped me and surrounded me like a black cloud pushed the memories I’ve been trying to forget to push to the forefront of my mind and completely take over.
“I-I t-t-think s-s-so,” I murmur, trying to sit up until Bear places a hand on my arm and shakes his head no.
“I don’t think you’re ready to be up and movin’ around just yet. What happened Callie?” he asks, sitting down on the bed next to me as I inch closer to soak up the heat coming off of him. “It was like you just shut down and started crying and turnin’ in on yourself. Not a single one of us could get a reaction out of you. Fuck, you’ve been in here for almost an hour now.”
Color stains my face as I realize that all of these men witnessed my breakdown. I’ve never had my memories affect me the way that they did today. Now I have witnesses that know just how humiliating I was treated growing up and that I apparently have a horrid fear for women around me being treated the same way. That’s the only plausible explanation I have for the reaction that I just had.
“Come on sweetheart, let us hold this burden for you,” Renegade says, sitting down on the opposite side of me eliciting another growl from Bear. “‘til you claim her, I don’t wanna hear it.”
I take a deep breath and realize that I’m not going to get out of telling these guys what’s going on with me. “Please, don’t let this leave this room. I’m already not happy that I have to tell you guys what’s going on,” I begin, pausing until the men surrounding me all n
od their heads in agreement. “Growing up, I didn’t have a normal childhood. My sister Anna and I were raised to be trophy wives to some stuffy business type. We didn’t attend public, or private, school but were home schooled by my mom. She made us do just enough work so that the state wouldn’t come after them. I wasn’t allowed to have friends growing up either. The only time we saw anyone outside of the house was if we had a function to attend. My parents had to present a happy family for their ‘friends’. I’ve never had a boyfriend or anything that goes along with dating.”
I pause my story, even though I’m giving them the abbreviated version of my life and see them standing there looking at me. Smokey and Psycho have stunned looks on their faces while the rest of the guys have schooled their features so I have no clue what their reactions are. “Anyway, we had to be dressed to perfection with our hair done and light make-up applied before we left our rooms every single morning. Our beds had to be made, and nothing could be out of place in our rooms. I had a problem with looking the way my mom wanted me to. So, she would yell at me, hit me if my dad wasn’t around, and would call me all sorts of names. When my sister got old enough, she joined in on the fun and humiliated me every single second she could. Especially if we were out in public. The only reprieve I ever got was when I came to see my grandma. I guess when I saw that the girl hadn’t cleaned the kitchen like she was told that I kind of got lost in the memories of those times when I didn’t do something right.”
I can’t say another word right now. I’m so exhausted just from the little bit that I’ve already shared. My eyes start closing as I hear movement around me and the room goes even more silent than it was before. As the bed begins to move for a second time, my eyes fly open and I see Bear standing up. There’s a look of pure rage on his face, I know that look well. But I’m not scared of him or what he’s going to do to me.
