by Lotus Rose
“What?” Malice say. “Don’t do that! You said you’ve regretted things? Well, you’ll regret not embracing the braver version of yourself.”
“But I can’t handle being brave! I get so anxious and frightened, and then I worry about what’ll happen if I fail.”
“But I’ve seen you be brave before. Don’t give up on yourself.”
Humpty looks at Malice with his eyes so sad. “I’m so tired, Maly, tired of trying and always failing. Maybe I should stop being disappointed in myself and just admit I’m a coward.”
“Oh, my dearest Humpty. I hate to see you putting yourself down. Please don’t give up. I’ll help you to be brave, you just need practice. I believe in you...” She takes his hands in hers. “Dearest Humpty.”
His face grows red as his eyes search hers. He seems to be mustering up the courage to say something.
“Yes? What is it dear?” she says in a soothing voice.
“Don’t you see? You have been helping me, all along. Encouraging me. And despite everything, I’ve been too much of a coward, to even—do it. I don’t deserve to even have someone as great as you in my life.”
Malice says, “Wait, what are we talking about here? Are you talking about me?”
He nods meekly, he hesitates, then forces himself to speak. “My greatest acts of...cowardice...haven’t had to do with monsters, or villains...though, don’t get me wrong, I find those horrifying. But my most cowardly acts—no I take that back—my most cowardly inaction has to do...”
He’s hesitating again.
“With what, dear?” Malice says while gently squeezing his hand.
In a choked up voice, he says, “You. I’ve been a coward when it comes to you.” He breaks his gaze with her and looks at the ground, with an expression of shame.
Malice feels her heart beginning to race. “You know, I like you. I’ve said that before.”
“I know.”
“And if you’re willing to take things further, I’m willing to, also.”
“I know.” He nods sheepishly, his cheeks glowing bright red with a blush.
He pulls his hand away from hers and covers his face. Malice steals a glance at his so-called-reflection in the mirror to see, that it is watching on, his hands at his side, with a smirk upon his face.
“You’ve been so encouraging,” Humpty murmurs. “You’ve been so encouraging, in fact, that you’ve actually been insistent and mocking, nagging me just to do it. You’ve been so willing to, that you’ve nearly literally pulled me onto you, because you were so fed up with me. And yet, still, I’ve been too afraid, to just, you know...”
“What?” Malice says.
“To show you. To do what you want me to, and what I want to do...”
“You mean, kiss me?!”
“Yes, I’ve wanted to. I know I did before, and I’ve wanted to again. You’re so beautiful, and god how I’ve wanted to, but I’ve been too afraid.”
The Cat zooms next to Humpty’s head, and says, “Just do it, ya daft bloke. She wants you to, too.”
Humpty shoots him a glare. “Get out of here. This is private.”
“Yeah,” Malice says. “You’re not supposed to interfere, so go bother the others.”
“Oh, bother,” the Cat mutters, but he nods and teleports out of the room.
“He’s right though, you know,” Malice says, and she bites her lip fetchingly.
“What do you mean?”
As he looks into her eyes, she locks her gaze with him. “I do want you to kiss me. Right now. And I don’t even have any black rose in my system, so you can’t use that as an excuse anymore.” She gives him a quirky grin.
He looks away. “I’m too shy. And if I did kiss you, you’d expect me to do it more in the future, and I don’t think I can, and perhaps it’s best to just put an end to this, stop leading you on, and accept who I am.”
Malice feels a flash of anger. “Of course I want to kiss you in the future! Over and over. You could be him in the future, and stop being a little pansy.” She points at his reflection.
As Humpty meets gazes with his reflection, his reflection smirks back.
And Malice feels a pang of guilt as her heart’s kindness kicks in. “I’m sorry, love, I shouldn’t have said that.”
Humpty is frowning with watery eyes. As he talks, the reflection doesn’t, but rather watches on quietly with a grin upon his face. “This reflection in the mirror, isn’t me. I can never become him. I should just accept who I am now, a shy coward.” He lifts the hammer and his reflection mockingly lifts a hammer as well. Humpty says, “I should just accept my fate and crack the mirror.”
Malice’s brow furrows. “So shall you never kiss me again? Please don’t turn me away like that. I want to be affectionate with you, perhaps even have a relationship with you.”
He scowls at her. “You mean, the same way you want to have a relationship with Hatter?!”
“He’s made it clear he doesn’t want to.”
“Oh, come on! We both know the only reason he won’t get involved with you is because of your age difference. Why, if he was your age...”
“But he’s not! And you are. I don’t get it! You’re jealous of Hatter? And yet, you’re pushing me away, when I’m standing here saying it’s you I want to have a relationship with?”
Humpty flings his hands up in the air. “Okay, I admit I’m jealous. I can’t stand the thought of you kissing him and not me. And, yet!... I realize how idiotic that is!”
“Do you want me to promise not to kiss him?” Malice says in confusion.
“No, kiss whomever you want! I have no right to be jealous, and if I finally just bow out of the running for good, I will finally be at ease and can go on with the rest of my cowardly life.”
“Oh, Humpty...”
“Don’t worry about me. I’ll be much less bothered if I cease trying to improve myself, and accept that I’ll never become this guy.” He lifts the hammer, and the reflection lifts his hammer. “Time to shatter any hope that I will.”
“No, please, Humpty. Please embrace him, for me, Humpty...”
Humpty shakes his head, but his reflection doesn’t. “I’m sorry, Maly.” He draws the hammer back.
But the reflection lowers his hammer and locks eyes with Malice. He lifts his empty hand and crinkles his fingers repeatedly as if beckoning her to step forward.
“What?” she blurts out in surprise.
The reflection waggles his brows at her and smiles cockily.
The real Humpty lowers his hammer. “What’s he doing?”
The reflection looks at Humpty. The reflection lifts up one finger in a “wait” gesture, now he shakes his hand side to side, now points at the “reflection” hammer in his hand.
Malice takes a few seconds to decipher the gestures. In a questioning voice she says, “Are you saying...wait, before using the hammer?”
The reflection nods. He points at his own lips.
“Hmm?” Malice says, and tilts her head to one side.
The reflection presses his lips to the inner surface of the mirror and it looks as if he’s pressing his lips against a transparent glass window. And again the reflection points to his own lips, and adds a wink to Malice.
“He wants you to kiss him!” the real Humpty exclaims indignantly.
The reflection gives an awkward sort of nod to that, while all the while keeping his lips pressed against the mirror surface.
It looks quite ridiculous with the reflection’s lips held in suspended smush like that, and before she can stop herself, Malice lets forth a little giggle.
“No! Stop that!” the real Humpty shouts at his reflection. The reflection keeps his lips pressed to the glass, ignoring him.
Malice sighs. “I think that’s really unfair, Humpty. You’ve made it clear you want to give up. Fine. You’re never gonna become like your reflection. But you aren’t going to ever kiss me, and before you break the mirror, this is my last chance to ever kiss the closest thing to t
he real you that I can. So, no, you don’t get to stop me. I shall kiss him, since I can’t kiss you...you can at least allow me that!”
She shifts her gaze to the reflection, who has his head tilted and his eyes closed, his lips still invisibly smushed. He is lustily tonguing the inside mirror surface.
It looks silly, but she resists the urge to laugh. She wonders if she’ll even feel his tongue—she suspects it shall feel as if she’s kissing glass. “Well,” she murmurs, “this is the closest I’ll ever get to kissing the real you, ever again...”
“No!” Humpty says forlornly. “Not with him.”
“Are you jealous of your own reflection?”
“Yes, okay? I’m jealous! Don’t kiss him, please!”
Malice shrugs. “But you’re bowing out, remember?” She leans her head forward toward the reflection.
She hears the hammer drop and clatter on the floor, causing her to wince, but she doesn’t turn to see.
The reflection opens his eyes at the sound—the reflection is still holding his hammer, by the way. Malice locks eyes intensely with the reflection—he looks so much like the real Humpty—this is how she had fantasized it could be between them—so passionate. But now she has to settle for pretending, but she abandons herself to the emotion—as if succumbing to a dream, she locks eyes with the reflection.
“No...” she hears the real Humpty murmur to himself.
And the reflection closes his eyes, and she closes hers, she tilts her head, despite the fact she knows their noses won’t collide, and she edges her head forward, almost touching her lips to his, even though she knows it shall only prove to be disappointing—she’ll only be kissing flat glass.
“No!” Humpty shouts.
She feels a hand upon one arm and the shoulder of the other arm, twisting her body away from the mirror.
She opens her eyes to see Humpty’s face, contorted with anger. His hands are firmly against her shoulders and she shudders at his touch, yearning for more as they gaze intensely into each other’s eyes.
“Do it,” she says.
He presses his palms to each side of her face. She closes her eyes and he kisses her passionately. Their tongues intermingle, and she moans—it feels so much better than licking a mirror would have.
They pull out of the kiss.
“Wow,” Malice says.
“Yeah.”
“See, you can be brave. You can be that guy in the mirror someday.”
“You’re right. You helped coax that guy out of me. I want to be that guy someday. I want to be that guy who kisses you over and over again.”
“Mmmm. Promise?”
He nods. “I’ll do my best. I can at least keep trying, and at least choose not to destroy any possibilities with a hammer, you know. I choose to embrace my reflection, the potential future me!”
Malice smiles at him. “Oh, Humpty, I’m so glad for you!”
“I’m doing it because of you, and my feelings for you.”
“Whoa,” Malice whispers. “Well that was a heckuva kiss.”
Humpty gives her a crooked grin. He turns to face his own reflection. “Well, you cheeky rake, you made me jealous. But maybe one day I shall no longer envy you, because you and I will be the same person. I’m gonna embrace you as my role model.” He puts his arms around the mirror and hugs his reflection affectionately.
“Awww,” Malice says, whilst she watches.
The mirror shines with a bright white light for a few seconds before dimming again.
Humpty pulls out of his hug, while looking uncertain what to do next. The mirror has shifted into a nonreflective silver color.
“What now?” Humpty says.
As if in answer, a slab in the wall ahead of them slides up, revealing a hallway lined with torches. About ten feet into the passage, a stairway leads upward.
“Are we supposed to go up those stairs?” Humpty says.
“You should. You passed your mirror challenge. I should stay here and help the next bloke or brat.”
Humpty pouts. “I embraced the brave reflection-me, but I don’t feel any braver.”
“I think that embracing your reflection must’ve just meant you’re striving to one day be like him. I guess you still have to put in the hard work.”
His shoulders slump. “Oh, bother. It would’ve been so much easier if I could’ve just magically been made more courageous. But I’m willing to strive a heck of a bunch, if it means I can make out with you more.” He looks down shyly.
“Awww, you’re sweet.”
Humpty is looking at the ground, thinks for a moment, seeming to rethink his shyness, and shake it off. He raises his head and winks saucily at her, causing her to giggle.
“Oh, my!” she says. “Well, you’re well on your way to being a sassy cad! Now get out of here!” She playfully presses upon his shoulders. “...before you sweep me off my feet and make me act like a wanton dame of wild abandon!” She giggles.
He laughs, bows, and makes his way to the stairs at the end of the tunnel.
As he starts up the stairs, the slab of stone descends again, with a boom, in front of Malice.
A loud scraping sound sounds behind her, causing her to startle and turn. Behind her, the slab of stone rises again, revealing the entrance to the room through which she and Humpty had entered.
“Bring on the next contestant,” she murmurs to herself.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
“HATTY, BABY!” MALICE exclaims as he walks into the room. “Oh, and hello again,” she says to the Cat, feeling too kind and polite to say anything harsher.
“Queeny,” the Cat says, and playfully sticks out his tongue. “So did you two?...”
“None of your business,” Malice replies.
The slab of stone slides back down to seal them in. They approach the mirror, which is still “turned off” and non-reflective.
Malice sees that the hammer has somehow reappeared atop the pedestal. Hatter takes a moment to read the short instructional poem.
“Just pick up the hammer and stand in front of the mirror, dear,” Malice says, “and your magic reflection should appear like it did for Humpty. Oh, but before you do that, do you know where you are?”
“But of course, My Queen. I’m in the Den of Mirrors. As are you, by the way. Did you forget?”
“No, love. But if you’re like Humpty, you shall, once you see your reflection.”
“Ah, I see. Well, in actuality, I don’t see...the reflection, that is. Oh, and I must cordially request that you not refer to me with such familiar terms of affection.”
Malice quirks her mouth. “Go on then, my loyal servant.”
“As you wish, my liege.” He picks the hammer up.
Hatter faces the mirror, the mirror glows with a golden light and Hatter gazes, in a trance.
After the light dims, they stare at the reflection in the mirror, which is a teenage Hatter. Other than that, the two Hatters are the same, both wearing a top hat and blue tunic, holding a hammer, both tilting their head while peering at each other.
“My, how curious,” Hatter says. His reflection mimics his mouth movements.
“Crikey,” the Cat says in a teasing voice. “A little bratty Hatty!”
Grownup Hatter replies by puffing air from his mouth.
Malice says to him, “Is he the you you wish to be?”
Hatty lifts his shoulders, and lowers them again. “He’s the me I shouldn’t be.”
Malice notices that the reflection’s mouth didn’t move as Hatty spoke, but she doesn’t dwell on that. “Well that’s not what I asked,” she says.
Hatter says, “When I look in the mirror, it is he that I see. I mean that symbolically, and occasionally, even literally, like now, by some strange coincidence.”
“It’s not a coincidence. It’s the magic, making you see that. Oh, and speaking of magic, do you happen to know where you are right now?”
“In front of this looking glass, of course.”
“The
Den of Mirrors?”
He shrugs. “Don’t know what that is.”
“Do you know you’ll be trapped here forever if you crack that mirror?”
He looks at her with a puzzled expression. “Apologies, My Queen, but I have no idea what you just said. It was all gobbledygook and tripe.”
The Cat zooms next to Malice’s ear and quietly says, “Enchanted.”
Malice gives him a curt nod. To Hatter, she says, “So when you look in a mirror normally, you see a younger version of yourself? What do you mean?”
Hatter takes a deep breath and steeples his fingers—his reflection does also, but in an immature, mocking way.
Hatter says, “How can I put this?” (The reflection’s mouth doesn’t move.) “Um, I’m very immature for my age.”
“I’ll say!” the Cat exclaims, and chuckles.
“Of course you are, my darling,” Malice says, “that’s what I love about you—your youthful thinking, your playfulness. It’s as if, on a mental level, we are actually at the same level of maturity, so that whatever our actual physical ages may be, they aren’t—”
“Oh, no no, Maly! Don’t start with that again! Because there are rules! And the fact of the matter is that I’m not a teenager! I’m a grown man in my mid to upper-mid twenties!”
“Which is it?” the Cat quips.
“A gentleman never reveals his age,” Hatter says. “And the point is, that I’m a grownup, and I should act like one. I can’t go on existing in arrested development for the rest of my life.”
“Whose arrest?” the Cat says.
“Yes you can!” Malice says to Hatter. “Embrace your inner teenager, and I mean that literally.” She points at the reflection, who isn’t doing a good job of a mimic, standing there with a vacant, slack-jawed expression.
“But I am literally not a teenager. I need to start acting like an adult.”
“But if it’s a teenager that’s who you are on the inside—”
“No!” Hatter shouts. “Yes, my outside doesn’t match the inside! But it’s my body’s age that matters. I’ve got to be a grown up!” He stomps his foot.
