“Do you wish I had?”
She brought his hand to her mouth and kissed it, and then decided she felt up to sitting up and kissing him properly. It wasn’t until their tongues had a chance to swirl together for a long minute that she pulled back and answered his question. “No, I don’t. It’d make things simpler, but I don’t wish him dead. I wish he’d get a frigging clue. And it doesn’t bother me that he’s hobbling around right now, nor that you beat him up. But I need a man with some gentle in him too, as well as a healthy dose of strong. I know that now. I wish I’d known it then.”
He smiled. “Now is the part of life we can do something about.”
“Then let’s.” She took a deep breath, ignoring the way her rib complained. The pain reminded her she was alive, even though it definitely wasn’t good pain. “What time is our flight?”
“Leaves here at noon, stopover in L.A.”
So easy. Leaving everything she knew except for one man should be harder than that. But she wasn’t sure she could do it right now if it was. She was suddenly feeling very tired. The cumulative effect of her injuries, the stiffness she still had from spending days in that horrible cage and the painkillers were all taking their toll. “Don’t leave me. Not for a minute.”
“I’m staying by your side from now on, and all the way to Melbourne, love. Don’t worry.”
“Can he come even there to chase us?”
“I mentioned his name to my friend, and I believe he is getting put on a do-not-fly list as we speak.”
She nodded and closed her eyes. Free to start over, from scratch. Well, from scratch plus Nick. A few seconds later, she was asleep.
* * * * *
“What must they think of me, Nick?” She’d worn a long-sleeve T-shirt and jeans, but she still felt as if anyone who looked at her would know her whole story. Her lip was still swollen from where Stu had smacked her, and her eyes felt swollen too, although that was from lack of sleep rather than being hit. She felt the stares of the teenage boys when Nick had introduced her to them at dinner. It had been worth it to have a juicy blackened steak instead of hospital food, but now that Nick was taking her to his room, it all seemed decidedly odd.
“I imagine they think you’ve been roughly treated. And I wouldn’t normally take a woman to my hotel room on a field trip like this, but obviously these are special circumstances. They can guess you need taking care of. I talked to Bill and Connie, and they agree. You’re staying with me.”
“Yes Sir.” She looked around. It was a simple enough hotel room. One bed. Not that she wanted to sleep anywhere else but with him, but it made it hard to pretend she wasn’t.
“I’ll be sleeping on the floor.”
She blinked. “Huh?”
“The nurse asked if I was the type to roll over and press against you, and I said I was, and she told me I better not sleep with you for a few days. Your ribs. Trust me, I’d much rather be in bed with you.”
She shook her head. “Funny, I always figured if I was in a relationship with a man where we weren’t sleeping in the bed together, I’d be the one sleeping on the floor.”
“Why’s that?”
“As punishment? I dunno. I have strange fantasies, sometimes.”
He chuckled. “You do. Happy to fulfill some of them, although perhaps not that one. Now that I know your secret though, you’d best behave. But for right now, I’m afraid you’re safe, whatever you do. You need the sleep, and you need to heal.”
She nodded and sat on the bed. She didn’t need to be safe from him. But she loved the way he cared for her.
“What did he do to you, Zoe?”
She frowned at him and then shook her head. “I don’t want to talk about it right now.”
He crouched so that she was looking down at him rather than up. “Can’t, Zoe? If it’s can’t talk about it, I’ll respect that. If it’s just I don’t want to though, I need to know. As your Dom. As your partner. I need some kind of clue as to where it hurts, physically and emotionally, so I can take care of you as best I can.”
She sighed. She knew he was right. “He didn’t rape me, if that’s what you were thinking. I actually offered to get him off a few times, thinking that would make him drop his guard. He didn’t take me up on it, although he loved to describe all the things he was going to do to me once my punishment time was over. If I behaved. Sometimes he’d stroke himself while he talked about them, and once, he shot his—well, anyway—in my cage.”
He took hold of her hand and stroked it. “Ugh. Bad enough. I wondered if you held something back from the police because you didn’t want to be part of a rape trial.”
“If he had raped me, I’d have said so, even though I thought he’d done enough they’d keep him.”
“His connections.”
She sighed. “His father made a fortune in oil, and makes a lot of big political donations.”
He nodded and waited for her to go on. She took a deep breath. “Anyway, you saw the cage. I spent most of my time in there. He’d keep me gagged for hours, as if he was afraid I might say something to him. I knew no one could hear me scream from there. He’d take me out to beat me now and then, usually with a cane. He’d tell me he loved me when he hit me. Never at any other time.
“I think those words were almost worse than the blows, you know? I can take pain. In the right circumstances, I can enjoy it, but regardless I can take it. He’d made sure of that, while we were married. But he didn’t have a right to say those words to me. He didn’t.”
Nick squeezed her hand. “Pretty fucked up.”
It fit together, suddenly, in a way it hadn’t before she started talking it out. “I don’t think he even wanted me. He just couldn’t stand the fact that I’d left him, and he needed to win.”
“You know that I want you, right?”
“Yes, I do. And I won’t make you prove it by getting into bed with me, because I know you’re right about my rib. Someday I won’t be damaged, Nick. Someday I’ll be worthy of you.”
“You’re worthy now, Zoe. No talking shit about yourself.” His voice was scolding but it was gentle too. Nothing like Stu. Nothing at all. Besides, Stu never minded her running herself down.
“Yes Sir,” she said gratefully.
“How’d he get a hold of you in the first place?”
She sighed. That was the most embarrassing part. “I was feeling really good about myself after the last conversation we had online, really strong. Somehow I was convinced that was more powerful than his dubious hold on reality. I went over there, like an idiot, without bringing anyone with me. There were some things of mine at his place. Some books, a painting my grandfather had done. I wanted them back, especially the painting.”
“Where are they now?”
“He’d cut the painting into shreds in a rage when I left. The books are probably still on his bookcase. I can get new books. Anyway, that’s it, really.” It was good to talk about it all to a point, but she wanted to be finished. “He wasn’t very imaginative, really, was he? Just the same stupid shit, over and over, and for some reason he thought I’d come around. Or maybe he just wanted to think that. I think he knew it wasn’t working. Any questions?”
He shook his head and kissed her lightly on the cheek. He was so gentle with her. As if he was afraid she was too fragile.
“I won’t break,” she murmured.
He grinned. “In that case, you like help taking your clothes off, Zoe?”
She blinked. “Um, I don’t get to keep them on? I mean, after all I’ve been through?” She knew it was a lame excuse. For someone else maybe it wouldn’t have been. But he’d seen her naked in the cage, having drooled all over herself. She didn’t look as bad now as she did then. She felt shy about her body, but she didn’t need to keep her clothes on.
“If what you’ve been through means that it would hurt you to follow directions at any time, Zoe, you have your safe word. You remember it?”
She nodded. Pad thai. She could still reme
mber the taste and smell of the food she’d eaten with him back in Australia. The memory helped relax her.
“I expect you to use it,” he said. “You won’t have to justify it, although I might ask questions so that I understand. But if you have to use it five times a day or five times a minute, that’s all okay. I want you safe. Mind, body and soul.”
She nodded and took a deep breath. Her side complained bitterly. I’ll have to learn not to do that. “I’m not using my safe word for this.”
“Then answer the question, please.”
She took a moment to remember exactly what it was. “Yes, I would like help taking my clothes off. Especially my shirt and my bra.” She smiled and added, “Sir.”
He lifted her shirt over her head. It hurt for a moment, lifting her arms, but only a little, and not nearly as much as it would have working the whole thing off herself. Being able to get dressed in the morning and undressed at night without pain was something she usually took for granted, but now she was really looking forward to it.
He sat on the bed to get her bra. It was nice not to have to reach back too. It’d be even nicer not to be wearing tape all around her lower torso.
“Now the pants.”
She made a face. “I can’t be much to look at right now, and if you’re not going to join me on the bed anyway, can’t I keep the rest of my clothes on?”
“I didn’t say I wasn’t going to join you on the bed.” And in fact, he didn’t get up off it. “I said I wasn’t going to be sleeping in it. Awake, I think I can trust myself. I’m going to make love to you. Take the rest of your clothes off.”
“Yes Sir.” She got up and noted his words. Not have sex with, or fuck, but make love to. A lot of guys might say it that way, but she had the feeling he meant it. Normally something more primal might be desired, but not in her current state. In fact, any sort of sex might give her trouble. “Sir? I don’t think I can take your weight, and I’m not sure I could move around on top either. You may have to give it a few days.”
He raised his eyebrows. “Did I mention I had a very thorough conversation with the nurse about what I could and could not do with you?”
She could feel the heat rise in her face, and figured her cheeks were as red as Rudolph’s nose.
“You’re going to have to trust me,” he said.
Trust him. Doubt flickered through her for a moment, and she could tell by his expression he could read that doubt in her eyes. But he didn’t say anything. He just waited. She wanted to trust him. She knew, intellectually, she could. It was the opposite of how it had been with Stu in the early days, when she knew she shouldn’t trust, and yet she found it all too easy to pretend she did. Now she had faith in Nick and found it difficult to act like it. She unbuckled and unzipped her pants, and pushed them down along with her panties. Naked he wants, naked he gets.
“You still have your clothes on,” she complained.
“I love a girl with good powers of observation.” He patted the center of the bed. “Right here, darlin’. Lie back and let Nick take care of you.”
She crawled onto the bed. Her breasts felt heavy as they swayed beneath her. She wanted to sway her hips sexily, but she didn’t feel sexy. She slid her arms forward and let herself drop, and instantly regretted it. “Ow.”
“You okay?”
“Yes.” It hurt, but she hadn’t injured anything. Everything she did seemed to hurt.
“Can you roll over onto your back?”
“It’d be easier if you rolled me over.” She hated to sound as if she expected him to serve her, but it was the truth.
“Okay.” He put his hands on her left hip, and then seemed to change his mind and moved to her right, which meant he’d be pulling her rather than pushing her. It also meant she wouldn’t be on her right side for even a moment as he rolled her over, and she was grateful for that. For a Dom, he sure was thoughtful. Or maybe he was extra thoughtful because he was a Dom. That idea would take some getting used to.
“Where do you want my arms?” she asked.
“This time, wherever they are the most comfortable.” His fingers moved to her shoulders, his touch featherlight as it drifted lower. Any lighter it would tickle and she would laugh, and that wouldn’t feel good at all, but a heavier touch on her welts would have been painful. He seemed to know what level was right. Her nipples tightened and poked toward the ceiling. He avoided them, sliding his fingers around her breasts until the peaks ached and she needed his touch. Then, finally, he relented, brushing a calloused finger against one, lightly pinching the other. She caught herself before a sharp intake of breath and tried to keep herself calm and steady. She was able to help her breathing, but the rest of her didn’t feel calm at all. Her thighs tensed and pulled outward in response to the liquid warmth in her pussy. He’d have her tingling all over if he kept it up.
He bent down and sucked a nipple into his mouth. There was a welt below it, and it stung for a moment when he touched it, but then his tongue soothed and cooled the burning line. He pressed the peak between tongue and tooth, compressing it almost to the point of pain. It made her want more. “Yes.”
He took her other nipple between two fingers and pressed. She whimpered and hoped he wouldn’t take it for disapproval. She ached to arch at his touch, but her rib wanted no part of that. The sting in her nipples distracted her from the ache in her side and the burn on her skin from where the cane welts rubbed against the bed. She needed the intensity, now more than ever. Just because he was being gentle with her injuries didn’t mean he had to have a soft touch.
She moaned when his fingers left her breasts to nudge her thighs farther apart. She half expected him to plunge his fingers deep into her melting core, but he didn’t, instead feathering along her inner thighs. That area, at least, had no cane marks. She supposed Stu hadn’t been able to get enough of a wind-up, although she knew a true Master with the cane could make the instrument sing with just a slight flick of the wrist.
Nick moved in between her legs, his knees pressing her own knees farther apart. He’s not going to fuck me, is he? Panic threatened her for a moment, thinking of his weight on her tender rib. But it quelled as easily as it rose. She trusted him. She knew she could. And if she was healthy she’d like nothing more than to feel his body tense as he came inside her. Soon.
He bent his head and she realized what he intended to do.
The first touch of his tongue on her pussy was electric. He started at the edges, licking up and down her folds, building a fire deep within. She reached out to bury her fingers in his thick, dark hair, hoping he didn’t think she was taking too much control. She needed to do something. She couldn’t just lie back and enjoy it. But she was happy letting him do as he wished, especially because he was doing it so well.
His tongue flicked across her clit and sent a surge running down her spine. “Yes!”
He lifted his head for an agonizing second. “Be quiet, love, you don’t want to let the kids know what we’re doing.”
She suppressed a giggle. No, she didn’t. She was supposedly in his room because he was nursing her back to health, and cries of ecstasy might puncture that story. When the tip of his tongue slipped across her pearl of pleasure again, she settled for closing her eyes tightly shut and making an unladylike grunt.
He didn’t seem to object, since he brought his tongue back again in exactly the same place. If he kept doing that, there was no way she was going to hold on.
Something entered her pussy, slipping in easily. His fingers. He curled them inside her, stroking her G-spot. He licked around her clit, dodging it first, and then sucking it in. She whimpered. So close. “Master,” she whispered. He reached up with his free hand and pinched a nipple between thumb and forefinger, compressing the hardened flesh so hard it stung, and that sent her over the edge. She jammed her left fist in her mouth to stop herself from screaming at the top of her lungs. Nick, Nick.
Pleasure ripped through her body like a tidal wave, running the lengt
h of her torso and shivering down each of her legs. She grabbed on to something and pulled hard with her right hand, and let go when she realized it was his hair. But he didn’t jerk back, didn’t say a thing. She rode it out, feeling herself undulate in response to the pulses of intensity. Her rib didn’t complain too much. She wouldn’t have listened to it if it did.
At last she lay still, trying to get her breath back, chest heaving. Shallow breaths were best, the doctor said, and she knew that was right, but they took longer to do the job when she felt short on oxygen.
With Nick smiling down at her, she felt as if she had all night. Maybe all of a lifetime. She had a feeling she’d be spending a lot of it catching her breath.
“You get some sleep now,” Nick told her. “I’ll tuck you in and get you all comfy.”
“Please no.”
“Hmm?”
“I need to know I can make you happy. That I can give you pleasure.”
“Oh, you do, darlin’. But I don’t think you’re up to—”
“Not up to much. Not up to a lot of body shaking around. But I can lie on my side.” She rolled over. “One side anyway. Bring your cock up here. Let me show you I can please you.”
He was about to tell her she didn’t have to, she could tell. But he stopped, apparently realizing the depth of her need. He got off the bed and stripped for her. She admired the way the light gleamed off his firm, sculpted muscles, but she liked the way his cock stood straight out for her more. She felt wanted, desired. Pampered was nice, but lusted after was better.
He knelt on the bed and she rolled over, resting her head on a muscled thigh. She pulled his cock over toward her lips. It wasn’t the best angle ever for a blowjob, but it was what she could do. She licked the drop of salty precum off the tip, and then took him inside, rubbing her tongue against the side of his shaft. If it was awkward with his cock sideways in her mouth, his cock twitching let her know it didn’t bother him. Heck, maybe something a little different was an extra turn-on.
He rocked his hips, making it easier for her. She didn’t have to move quite as much, but she still had control over how much of him she took in. She wrapped her fist around his shaft and squeezed, then pumped him up and down. He groaned. She salivated. It was strange to want to taste his cum so much, but it wasn’t the taste, it was him. She moved her hand faster, knowing it was doing most of the work, feeling his cock pulse in response. She swirled her tongue around the sensitive tip and felt him jerk. She did it again, enjoying the power of it, feeling his muscles tense as he struggled with the intensity. Submissives don’t have to be weak. I’m strong. And I can drive him crazy.
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