“Anything! I will contact them right now!”
“I can’t say I blame him,” Lynn said. “The hour would have been a long one. I say we give old Quays a chance to make this right. How about you, Hamburger?”
“Let’s do it. Then I’ll meet with Alexi tonight and see if I can sell it to him. It will help we rescued his granddaughter, but the old man doesn’t make many deals.”
The setup by Tannous went as he had promised - readying of a container pickup by Fiialkov’s SS City of Hope at sea. Tannous told the people at the number given to him all was in readiness. He promised to contact them again when the City of Hope left the Tokyo Port. Laredo and Jafar zeroed in on the signal, but it was being bounced all over the world, much like they were doing with Tannous’s call line. Each time he contacted the number, it was changed, and a new one sent to him. The voice was disguised, so he never knew if it was the same person or not. Apparently we weren’t the only ones who knew Quays was not the supreme jihadist. We listened to the whole thing. When it ended, Quays smiled at us, until he saw Lynn’s face.
“I told you they would accept it! They have nowhere to go. They approached me after I gained control of Tamara’s fortune. They have never trusted me, but I moved on Rouheni’s money before anyone thought of it. Before your crew moved on me, I thought I had the most brutal people on earth working for me. So did Tamara.”
“There should be a laugh track with this,” Casey said. “For God’s sake, is this for real?”
“I told Hamburger it was either desperation or disaster,” Clint said. “Turns out… it’s both. How do you get us into these messes?”
“Me?” This was getting funny, but in a bad way. “Think about what we did to get to this point. Anyone else know what the hell we could have done differently?”
“Let me put the comedian back in his cage,” Lucas said. “Then we’ll go get some rest and meet at The Warehouse. Even I’m curious as to how Hamburger sells this to Fiialkov. We’ll have to keep the contact episode a secret so we don’t end up the butt of every joke in the intelligence hemisphere.”
Lynn grabbed Tannous by the ear, dragging him in front of Lucas. “Too late! C’mon, Lucas. I’ll help you put Quays away, and feed our guests. Then we’ll get some rest and go have a drink. Nice go, Hamburger.”
Each one of my so called crew left me with a small smilingly delivered epithet. Clint waited until last. “Say hi to Tess and her Mom for us. They arrived while we were away, brother.”
“Thanks, Clint… I needed that.” Their haunting laughter echoed away down the hall.
Chapter Seven
Family and Mission Bonding
I showered at our special place, the House of Pain. I had spare clothes there. I shaved carefully, thinking of how lovely my arrival at home would be. I wiped off and stared at my reflection. No longer swollen, my features looked more like their original shape. I tried different grins and smiles to see what would upset my in-laws the least. Fail. The discoloration and numerous healing cuts made me look grotesque if I grinned or smiled. Solemn and welcoming would have to do. Use your words carefully, you troll. I half expected my reflection to answer back. I figured Tess would be my biggest critic, and I’d let Lora handle her. Their Mom, Marion, would frown and look slightly aghast for a couple hours. I locked the House of Pain, and drove my old Chevy home. The other in-law face to face problem would be letting them know I had a get together at The Warehouse I could not avoid.
I called Denny on the way. I have all the up to date gadgets in the car. It may look like a rent-a-wreck, but running and communications were up to date. His voice greeted me.
“Hey, John, on your way home to meet with the in-laws? Clint already prepped me for what to expect tonight. I’ll be there to help with Fiialkov.”
“Good, I’m glad I don’t have to go over it all with you. I guess Clint gave you the laugh track part of our caper, huh?”
“Oh yeah, and he did it justice, including the cracks they left you with about it all being your fault. They’re getting quite creative. It never pays to scope out these terrorist plots with anything but an open mind. Some of it seems too stupid to work… and then it does. This would be one of those cases where we take no chances.”
“Agreed. I’ll see you over at the Warehouse.”
“Say hello to the family for me.” Denny knifed me before disconnecting.
I arrived at home about ten minutes later. Lora and Alice greeted me at the door. At least they looked happy to see me. We had a group hug, although I hadn’t been away very long. Lora knew it was a mission, and Al could read Lora like an old comic book. “Hi, girls. Did the family pickup go okay?”
“Jesse was free to give me a hand,” Lora replied. “We did it first class, but you know Tess. Nothing can ever be enough for the high and the mighty.”
“Uh oh.” Al giggled at my two syllable response. “Remember, no fighting. Your Mom’s here for only a couple weeks with Cal and Tess. Next week’s Thanksgiving. Aren’t all you ladies going to show little Al how to make Thanksgiving dinner? How bad can it be?”
Lora’s lips tightened into a tight sneering line of angst. “She’ll be dead before week’s end.”
“Aunt Tess said some bad things about our house, Dad,” Al explained. “We tried telling her it was me and Mom who wanted to stay in the neighborhood, but she’s convinced you’re making us stay here against our will.”
Damn. Tess is still carrying that chip on her shoulder from when she found out it was dangerous being around me, leading to two kidnappings in a very short span of time. “Can we just ignore anything like that, and enjoy the moment? You two know Tess can’t hurt me. I’m sure once they get a look at my face, our house will be the last thing on their minds.”
“The swelling’s down,” Al complimented me, and then stuck the knife in, “but you still look like you should be living under a bridge with a talking donkey.”
We were still enjoying that dart when Tess’s impatient voice rang out. “Well! Are you going to bring him in or stay on the porch all day?”
I barely grabbed up my wife in time to prevent a full scale launch with claws out. “Will you calm down? Al thinks it’s all funny. We’ll laugh her off. It’ll make her head explode.”
Lora relaxed in my arms while Al enjoyed my word picture of her Aunt’s head exploding in frustration. “Okay… okay. I heard on the grapevine you have a serious meeting at the Warehouse tonight. Lynn called to give me a head’s up so you wouldn’t be springing it on me at the last second.”
How thoughtful of her. “We could take everyone up there to eat. They have great food. Lynn will be there with Maria, I’ll bet. Maybe Lucas and Casey will bring Sarah and Anna. I know Jafar will bring Samira. Dev-”
Lora hushed me. “I’ve already had dinner cooking for tonight in the crockpot. I know how important this meeting is. Lynn told me Maria and the women’s Murderer’s Row auxiliary would not be there except for Samira. We’re eating in tonight. Come in and have a drink and a short gab session. Then you can get some sleep before the meeting.”
See, this is why I’m with Lora and not Tess. “I love you. Now, no more fighting. Al and I have your back, right Al?”
“Yep. Lynn’s teaching me some moves.” Al put her fists up. “I can handle myself.”
I pointed my finger at her. “You, young lady, watch what you pick up from Lynn.”
She yanked on my hand in answer. “C’mon, I want to see what happens when they see your face.”
The first one I saw was Tess’s husband, Cal Underwood. Cal is a good man. He had a huge smile on his face as he held out his hand and I shook it. His smile wavered a bit when he saw my face up close. He lowered his voice to just below a whisper. “Best UFC fight I’ve ever seen, John. I never thought you’d get out of the first round.”
“Neither did I, Cal. It’s great seeing you. Are we whispering because you didn’t see the fight with Tess?”
Cal glanced around toward the kitchen, and t
hen nodded. “Saw it on a friend’s 60” in HD. Good Lord, brother, I nearly passed out when you landed that last blow. I thought the Rattler’s head would pop off onto the mat. Are you going to fight him again?”
I tilted my head so he could get a good profile of me while I pointed at my face. “I don’t know. Think I should?”
Al and Lora enjoyed my little sight gag along with Cal, but then Tess and my mother-in-law, Marion, joined us with gasps of stunned displeasure. I held out my hand to Marion.
“Hi, Marion. I’m so glad you could make it out to visit us. How have you been?”
She grasped my hand after only a slight hesitation, peering up at me with something between a grimace, and revulsion. “Better than you apparently, John.”
“Al announced the swellings down, but I still belong guarding a bridge with a talking Donkey.” When only Cal, Lora, and Al laughed, I thought maybe Tess and her Mom didn’t understand the joke. “You know… like in the cartoon ogre movie, Shrek.”
“You think this is funny?” Tess folded arms over chest, leaning back in body language repugnance. “You speak God knows how many languages, have accumulated enough of a fortune to be living on a twenty acre estate, and have enough education to be teaching in three or four different disciplines. Yet here you are, getting your face turned into hamburger. And for what - to keep up some macho pretense of being a man?”
“Wow, that’s weird, Tess, and hello to you too. My crew has been calling me by that very nickname: Hamburger. You must be psychic.”
Everyone but Tess at least got a smile out of that comeback. Cal, of course, received the death rays of retribution promised. He waved her off with confidence.
“Why don’t you calm down Tess? How about a toast, John?”
I patted his shoulder on my way to the kitchen. “Now you’re talkin’. I have some sipping whiskey, or I can fix up mixed drinks too.”
Marion followed me. “I’ll have a double of the sippin’ whiskey, Hamburger.”
That lightened the mood. When we were all seated at my very elaborate and expertly decorated holiday table, Cal brought Tess the wine she’d asked for. I served Lora wine, Marion a double, and Al a little wine with ginger ale. That action received the Tess seal of disapproval – an annoying clucking noise I remembered well. Cal held up his glass.
“To my wonderful wife who will be making me a father.”
After the pandemonium Cal’s announcement and Tess’s blushing acknowledgement, we toasted. The congratulations were happy and heartfelt. Now I understood how Cal figured to get away with standing up to the joy-killer. We talked and sipped for the next hour about Cal’s law practice, and Tess’s accomplishments getting back into court. Marion loosened up and surprised everyone with an admission she was seeing a gentleman from her book club. Al got bored, and probably felt a little buzz from the wine cooler. She decided to stir the family cauldron up with Hamburger adventures.
“Dad saved a kidnapped little girl, and stopped a terrorist cell ring. The girl he saved, Michelle, is a friend of mine.”
“Holy shit, John, that’s incredible!” Cal was truly enthusiastic, and Marion was impressed. “Was this just recently since you returned from Las Vegas?”
“I have a team of law enforcement trouble shooters, Cal. We were able to stop an operation in Las Vegas, which led to our being able to rescue the granddaughter of a friend who helps our team with inside knowledge on some of the seedier avenues we have to investigate.”
“A gang of psycho killers is more descriptive of your team, John,” Tess chimed in.
“John stopped a school bombing at Al’s school a couple months back. What have you done, Sis? He and our employee, Lynn Montoya, singlehandedly stopped the guy and disarmed the bomb. You probably won’t live long enough to save as many people as John has just in a few months,” Lora said in tight mouthed fury.
“Please… let’s get back to new births, and happy talk,” I inserted. There really wasn’t any reason to pursue my adventures. Tess was right. I had a team of killers, and we were very good at it. That we saved people I admit is a bonus. “Are you thinking about marrying again, Marion?”
“I… well… yes, I have given the idea more thought than I ever did before. Randall is a construction foreman, a widower who lost his wife of many years to cancer. He and I read many of the same books, and follow the same authors.” Marion held up her glass. “One more of these please, Hamburger.”
“I’m in for another too,” Cal said.
“I believe I’ll join you.” I also refilled Lora’s wine glass, but gave Al the Dark Lord stare when she held up her glass.
“Oh, go ahead and give her a little more, Hamburger,” Marion ordered. “My Dad used to give me a couple shots of licorice liqueur on the holidays. I confess I used to sneak a few in between.”
“Mom!” Tess gasped, but Al giggled, and got a refill.
“Thanks, Grandma.”
“No problem, Al. Say… Hamburger… how about taking me to Las Vegas with your entourage when you fight there again in the future?”
Lora laughed, Tess stared at her Mom in shock, Cal put his hand over Tess’s hoping to ease her discomfort.
“Please take us, John,” Cal reiterated. “That Mandalay Bay Arena is amazing. So is the MGM one.”
“Done deal. If everything heals, and I get another opportunity, we’ll all go first class.”
“Try for someone other than the guy who did that to your face, Hamburger,” Marion joked. She was a regular comedian with a couple of shots in her.
“Don’t fight him again, Dad,” Al agreed.
I shrugged. “If I’m ever going to get your Grandma to the Mandalay Bay Arena for one of my fights, the Rattler may be my only way.”
Lora sighed. “I hope not.”
Yep, I’ll go along with that.
* * *
After five hours of some much needed sleep, I passed an amiable time with my family. They had already eaten, and were doing a five thousand piece Christmas puzzle together. Cal worked his iPad on I assumed business, while joking around with his four female companions, and sticking a piece in here and there. I mimicked my successful brother-in-law for an hour before taking my leave to attend the Warehouse meeting. Tess appeared to have mellowed out to a quiet contemplative state during the day, which I was grateful for. I felt confident I could leave without worrying about whether my wife would strangle her sister before I returned. I promised Al to walk her and the twins to school on their last day before Thanksgiving break.
I parked the old Chevy in a darkened patch away from the Warehouse, watching from the shadows for ten minutes while I gathered my thoughts on how to sell this clandestine freak show to Alexi. His shipping line acquired Tannous’s attention because Fiialkov’s hands were not snowy white with innocence. But for Lynn’s intuitive sting with Samara’s hecklers in Las Vegas, Tannous would not have been on our radar. We still would have rescued Michelle, and he’d know that. The only difference would have been that I’d have handed Tannous over to the old man. Alexi may or may not have found out about this anthrax plot. I took a deep breath. I was a half hour early for our loosely agreed upon meeting time.
As it turned out, Denny had beaten me there anyway. The Thursday night crowd consisted of a few of Oakland’s finest messing around in the gaming section, an older couple eating a late dinner, and one guy drinking alone at the bar. He was a regular named Cincy or something. I grinned and said hi to him on the way by. Denny looked up at my approach with Marla meeting me at the far end of the bar with my drink brothers.
“It’s good to see you back, Hamburger. All I could get out of your partner here was that things went well on your rescue gig. How’d the greetings with the out-laws go at your house?”
I drained one of the Beam brothers and quaffed half the other. She refilled the Beam. Marla knew my strained relations with Tess were an ongoing deal, thanks to chatty Lora using her as a sounding board during a girl’s night out with Lynn, Maria, and Samir
a. “That good, huh?”
“It could have gone better, Mar. When I left, there had been no bloodshed. Tess is pregnant, but still ornery as hell.”
“She always did have an edge to her. Once the baby arrives, she might change her attitude a bit. Too bad Tess can’t just enjoy herself for a short visit.”
“They were doing okay when I left, so maybe her husband Cal calmed her down a bit while I was snoozing.” I held up my Beam glass. “We’re meeting with Alexi, so I’ll just sip this one, Mar.”
“Good plan. That old mobster gives me the chills. It’s best not to converse with him in too much of an altered state. Call me if you change your mind.”
“Will do.” Denny and I waited until Marla disappeared into the back. “How are things in Denny land since this morning, Boss?”
“I rested. The Tannous tragi-comedy made me toss in my sleep, but I imagine it was the same for you too. I’m glad you didn’t have major reentry problems at your home.”
“Thanks. I’ve given it some thought, and I don’t see any other way than to meet City of Hope in Tokyo, ship out, and when the Muslim Brotherhood bunch pull up for an at sea exchange, they get Murderer’s Row instead. We secure the containers aboard City of Hope. Then you call in a Reaper strike and obliterate their damn ship.”
Denny looked at me in surprise for a moment, grinned, and nodded. “My thoughts exactly Cheeseburger.”
“It’s Hamburger to you, Spawn.”
“Not since you’ve hooked into my brain. You get a chewy topping added for that insight.”
“Very funny. My Mother-in-law is calling me Hamburger now. The real problem with my idea is we probably should leave Lynn here. Nearly three months pregnant is hardly a fit resume for an at sea assault.”
“Agreed. When are you going to tell her?”
“Why you low down… dirty… chicken shit poser. I thought you were running this team.”
“I leave notifications to my second in command, when they involve ordering Cruella Deville not to go on mission. She’ll take the news better if it comes from you, Cheeseburger.”
Hard Case IV: A Violent Life (John Harding Series Book 4) Page 11
