by GA Hauser
“Hello, Jordon.”
“Hi, Mom.”
“Is Fawn back from her week of flying?”
“Yes.”
“How is she?”
“Good enough to be out shopping.”
“Did you spend any time with her before she left?”
“A little. Not much.”
“Jordon. Have you thought good and hard over this marriage?”
“Too much.” He sat up, folding the paper.
“Talk to me.”
He slouched back, his feet up on the hassock and lowered the television volume. “She’s got many qualities I want in a wife, Mom.”
“What are they?”
“She’s not clingy. She doesn’t live her life with me as the sun and her as the planets. I couldn’t stand a woman like that. I need one who is fiercely independent, and she is.”
“Anything else redeeming?”
“She’s bright. She can hold a conversation. She’s energetic. She doesn’t want to stop working and get fat and lazy sitting around the house…”
“Do you love her?”
“Didn’t we have this conversation already?”
“Are you having an affair with Tyler Holliday?”
“I knew you’d think that. No. He’s just a good friend.”
“Jordon, I do think Fawn is a nice girl. She’s sweet and decent and doesn’t seem to be harmful in any way.”
“That’s not much of a compliment about the woman who’s about to be your only daughter-in-law.”
“I know damn well you don’t love her. Does she love you?”
“First of all, I never said I didn’t love her.”
“You never said you did.”
“She said she loved me.”
“Why does this sound horribly blasé?”
“Please. Don’t go into the fairytale romance crap again. I’ll puke,” Jordon said.
“From the time I have spent with Fawn, I find her very personable.”
“I adore her family as well. Her mother and father are awesome and I get along great with her brother and sister. So? What’s the catch? Mom, what the hell am I looking for? Tell me what’s out there that’s so great that I’ll miss it if I marry Fawn.” Silence followed. “Mom, I’ve dated a lot. More than I care to sit and explain to you. There’s no perfect woman out there. I have a few bottom line ‘can’t stands’ and she doesn’t match any of them.”
“Okay.”
“Good. Now get off my back about it.”
“When is she expected to return? Are you making her a nice dinner?”
Jordon checked his watch. “She should be home soon.”
“I’d love to see her. Why don’t you arrange a lunch with Blithe as well? Just the four of us. We can talk wedding plans and get excited.”
Jordon agreed, “I will, Mom.”
“Goodbye, sweetie.”
He hung up, feeling convinced he was doing the right thing.
***
By seven he grew sick of waiting. He called her mobile phone.
“Hello?”
“Fawn.” There was a lot of background noise. “Are you coming home for dinner?”
“What time is it? Oh! Seven? How did it get so late?” She sounded drunk.
“I’ve been waiting. Should I not be?”
“I’m having a drink with the girls.”
“Where are you? Can I stop by? Hang out with you guys?”
“With Camisha and Jewel? Why would you want to do that? You’d be bored out of your mind with us talking clothing and work.”
“I don’t mind. I wouldn’t be opposed to getting out of the house and having a drink with you.”
“Sure. Come by. Just don’t get upset when we talk girl talk.”
“I won’t.”
“We’re at Spotlight Live.”
“Where the hell’s that?”
“Sixteen hundred Broadway.”
“Be there soon.” He hung up, headed to the bedroom, and spruced up his appearance. He couldn’t very well go out in an NYU t-shirt and jeans.
A half hour and a cab ride later, Jordon was standing outside the club. Loud noise, he assumed live music, was spilling out on the warm summer sidewalk.
The place was jammed and as he made his way through the crowd, he realized the horrible noise was coming from a karaoke stage. To his chagrin, Fawn, Camisha, and Jewel were screaming, not singing, In Love With a Girl, by Gavin Degraw, like drunken fools, into a microphone.
“I did not need to witness this.” He recoiled in embarrassment, making his way to the bar. He waited what felt a long while to be served and ordered a glass of scotch, straight up.
The crowd appeared as intoxicated as his future bride, but he didn’t blame her for needing to unwind after the stress of a long week.
Once their song had finished, they bowed ceremoniously and stumbled off the platform, holding onto each other and laughing hysterically.
Jordon tried to wave at her but she was oblivious. He found his way through the horde, holding his drink aloft to avoid losing it, and met them as they gathered around a table they had laid claim to.
“Fawn.”
“Jordy!”
“Hi, Camisha, Jewel.” He nodded.
Jewel greeted him warmly but he received an odd coldness from the usually delightful Camisha.
“You guys have guts, I’ll give you that.” Jordon smiled at them.
“We’re drunk,” Fawn announced, as if he couldn’t tell.
“Yes. No kidding.” He moved to stand behind her so he was able to touch her. When he reached for her hand, he asked, “Where’s your engagement ring?”
“I didn’t want to lose it. It’s in my purse.”
“Not trying to pick up guys, are you?” he teased. Camisha gave him another long look. He addressed the pretty African-American woman, “You okay?”
“I was,” she replied, crossing her arms over her chest.
“Sorry. Am I intruding on girls’ night?”
“A little.” Fawn touched him to soften the blow.
“I’ve had five minutes with you since you’ve been home.” He caressed her hair. “I need more than that, lady.”
“Isn’t he dreamy?” Jewel drooled.
Camisha made a “humph” sound.
Jordon felt slightly disoriented by Camisha’s reaction. “I won’t stop you guys from having fun. Go sing another song. I just want some time with my woman.”
“I’m goin’ to the ladies’ room,” Camisha announced, leaving.
“Did I say something to offend her?” Jordon asked. “We usually get along well.”
“No. Don’t worry.” Fawn waved her hand dismissively while a stewed Jewel gazed at Jordon with gaga eyes.
“Babe.” Jordon forced Fawn to stand up so he could speak privately to her. “If you want me to leave, I will. I didn’t mean to intrude.”
“I think Camisha just likes it when it’s just us. Sorry, Jordon.”
“I get it.” He shot down his drink. “So? I’ll see you home?”
“I may stay at my place tonight.”
“Why?” He caressed her hair.
“Camisha and I had a long week at work. We just want to hang out and do girl things.”
“I want you to hang out and do girl things with me.” Jordon pressed against her.
“I have four days off, Jordy. We can spend all day Monday together.”
“Monday?” He tried to laugh. “I work Monday.”
“You know what I mean.”
Jordon found Jewel staring at him, biting her lip like she was about to jump his bones. “I spoke to Mom. She wants to have lunch with you, me, and Blithe.”
“That would be wonderful.”
“Tomorrow?”
“Tomorrow?” Fawn echoed as a man began belting out his version of Let it Die by the Foo Fighters, which was cringe-worthy.
“Yes, tomorrow. Sunday?” Jordon confirmed.
“Can I let you know?”
&nb
sp; “Let me know?” Jordon was growing annoyed.
“Okay, Sunday. I’ll call Mom.”
“Good. You just behave. Put your damn ring on.”
“You’re so silly.”
Jordon embraced her, finding her lips. When he tasted tobacco again he jerked back. “Do you smoke now?”
“Just one.” She held up her index finger.
“Will I see you in the morning?” He was struggling to be heard over the noise.
“Why don’t I just call you to let you know where to meet me and Mom for lunch? Then you and Maureen can meet us.”
“Perfect. See you tomorrow. Have fun.” He smiled at Jewel. “Watch over Fawn for me.”
Her eyes glazed, Jewel moaned, “You’re so good looking, Jordy.”
“Thanks. See ya.” He raised his head just in case Camisha was around and he could wave goodbye. She was nowhere in sight.
Once he was outside, Jordon felt too up for fun to go home. On a whim, he removed his phone from his pocket and dialed.
“Hello?”
“Mr. Holliday.”
“Mr. Buck.”
“What are you doing at the moment?”
“Watching men’s volleyball. Hubba hubba. What about you? Where are you?”
Jordon assumed Tyler could hear the noisy background of traffic and pedestrians. “Broadway.”
“Seeing your brother in a play?”
“No. I met Fawn at Spotlight Live, but she’s pretty determined to have a man-free night.”
“How Sappho of her.”
“Sorry?” Jordon never did get his slang references.
“You want some male companionship, Mr. Buck?”
“Only if you feel like it. Don’t put yourself out. After all, men’s volleyball…” Jordon laughed.
“Where on Broadway are you?”
“Sixteen hundred.”
“Wait for me.”
“I will.” Jordon disconnected the line. He knew he could count on Tyler.
***
Jordon avoided ogling leers from both sexes and leaned against the wall of a theater, checking inside cabs as they stopped. When a handsome man exited the back seat of one after giving him a seductive smile through the back window, Jordon’s spirits soared at his presence.
Tyler paid the fare and met Jordon on the sidewalk. “We meet again.”
“We do.” Jordon felt giddy.
“Where is Miss Fawn?”
“Spotlight Live.” Jordon gestured to it.
When Tyler made a face of disgust, Jordon asked, “What? No good?”
“Karaoke? Christ. It’s worse than I thought.”
“Now, now.” Jordon chided.
“Where to, Mr. Buck?”
“I don’t know. I’m not a nightclub sort of guy. This is uncharted territory.”
“Really?” They began walking down the block.
“I haven’t been to clubs in over a year. I grew weary of them.”
“I do go out on occasion with friends for a drink. But clubbing? Cruising? No, thank you.”
“You don’t cruise gay bars?”
Tyler spun around to meet his eyes. “Do you listen to anything I say?”
“What?” Jordon asked.
“No. I don’t cruise any bars. I have no interest in superficial, shallow sexual affairs.”
“Come on, Tyler.” Jordon laughed at the joke. “You’re a gorgeous gay male. You have to be kidding me.” When Tyler grabbed his arm and practically slammed him against a brick wall, Jordon paid attention.
“I do not cruise. I do not play around.” Tyler appeared to be holding back his fury. “Though you are incapable of understanding that a gay man can have a trusting, monogamous relationship, you are mistaken.”
A car passed and illuminated Tyler’s light eyes. Jordon’s craving to grab Tyler’s face and plant one on his lips was overwhelming.
“Are you listening to me?” Tyler growled.
“No. Christ, you’re so fucking handsome.”
“Jordon! I expect that kind of shit from your asshole brother. Not you!”
Tyler was about to storm away. Jordon grabbed his arm. “I’m sorry. I was listening.”
Tyler softened at his touch and replied, “I know you have some preconceived notion of what gay life is like, Jordon. But you have no idea what a gay relationship could be like.”
“Tell me. I promise I’ll pay attention.”
Tyler escorted Jordon to a quiet place near the entrance to a condominium tower. “It can be satisfying. Both partners getting and giving enough love and sex to complete them so they have no interest in other affairs. It can be two people sharing common goals and hobbies. Being content to spend evenings cuddling on the couch. Nurturing one another with care and massaging touch. Attending that partner’s needs, but allowing him to be his own man. Not infringing on his sense of self or dignity.”
Jordon’s lip began quivering again. “No. Two men can’t have that.”
“Why not? Why can’t two men have that, Jordon? What nonsense has your idiot brother been spewing to make you believe all gay men are promiscuous morons?”
“He wants to fuck everything. His co-stars, his workout partners, his classmates, his--”
Tyler held up his hand. “He’s a slut.”
“All gay men are, aren’t they?”
“I fucking resent that!”
“Tyler!” Jordon knew he was trying to convince, but… “Men want sex all the time.”
“Do straight men cheat, Jordon?” Tyler’s tone was indignant and slightly enraged.
“Of course they do. But--”
“How about straight women?”
“Tyler.” Jordon scoffed and shook his head. “You know the answer to that question.”
“When a man and a woman marry, what guarantee do they have that one will not stray?”
“None.”
“Then what’s the difference between that and a gay relationship?”
“Because I don’t see women asking to suck my cock on a daily basis.” Jordon fought to lower his voice.
“We don’t all say yes to those offers.” Tyler appeared about to scream.
“Sure you do.”
“Fine! Hang on.”
“Where are you going?”
“Hang on!” Tyler held up his finger and found three women who were walking down the street. He had a word with them that Jordon could not hear. “What the fuck?”
Tyler brought the women to stand in front of Jordon. They were grinning demonically at him and Jordon had no idea what perversion led to their expressions.
“Look him over, ladies.”
“Yum!” One’s eyes lit up.
“Anyone want to get dirty with him?” Tyler asked.
“Tyler!” Jordon died of humiliation.
“You bet, honey.” The pretty, tall one licked her lips.
“Would you suck his cock?”
“Tyler, what are you doing?” Jordon gasped in horror.
“When and where?” The third one pursed her lips.
“He thinks there aren’t women out there who will give him lip service. Tell him how wrong he is, girls.”
“Tyler, this is intolerable.” Jordon felt like covering his crotch, the leering was so intimidating.
“Here’s my card.” The pretty, tall woman handed him one.
“And mine!”
“And mine!”
“No. I don’t want them.” Jordon shook his head.
“Have I made my point?”
“You put them up to this,” Jordon accused.
“What did I tell you ladies when I first met you?” Tyler asked.
“You said you had a cute single friend.”
“What else?”
