by Donna Grant
Her back arched, a strangled cry fell from her lips when he pinched her nipple. Hayden smiled and wrapped his lips around the other nub. He swirled his tongue around it, teasing it, stroking it, until Isla whispered his name.
His name on her lips moved something inside him he had thought long dead. There was passion and wonder and joy in her voice.
Hayden could have suckled at her breasts for hours, but there was more of her to explore, more of her to enjoy yet. He lifted her hips to grind into her. The feel of her soft, supple body against him drove him mad with longing.
He could push into her now, sheath himself in her hot wetness, but he wanted her to scream his name first, to see her body bucking with a climax.
Then he would take her.
Slowly. Thoroughly. Savoring every moment.
Isla was mindless with desire. It raged through her body like a storm, overwhelming her with intense, fiery need. Her skin was extra sensitive and her blood burned in her veins. Every little touch, every caress from Hayden only stroked the flames within her.
Her breasts ached for more of his touch. She’d never felt anything like it before, and it had been amazing. The throbbing between her legs intensified, causing her to rub her hips against him. Heat consumed her, scorched her with passion.
Isla sucked in a shocked breath when Hayden shifted between her legs and held her thighs apart with his large hands. His black eyes rose to her, daring her to stop him as he leaned down and licked her sex.
She moaned, caught between the desire spilling through her and embarrassment that Hayden held her open for his view. The desire quickly won as Hayden’s tongue expertly stroked her clitoris. Isla forgot to breathe as the pure, amazing pleasure pulled her under.
It was too much. The sensations racking her body were too pure, too powerful to take. Isla tried to get away, but Hayden held her hips firmly in his hands. Just when she thought it couldn’t get more intense, the desire couldn’t build any higher, her world shattered.
She cried out, Hayden’s name on her lips as ecstasy unlike anything she’d ever known filled her, enveloped her. Even as her body calmed, she hungered for more.
Before she could take in a breath, Hayden was leaning over her, his hands beneath her back. He turned her, lifted her until she straddled his hips as he sat on the edge of the bed.
His arousal, hard and thick, lay between them. She wanted to touch him and stroke him as she had done her. She wanted to give him the same kind of pleasure, and she hoped he let her.
Isla cupped his face, running her hands over the rugged, chiseled features. She traced his wide lips with a finger, and was surprised when he pulled it into his mouth.
His wicked tongue sucked and licked her finger as his eyes blazed with desire. Isla knew it was the time to tell him she had never been touched by a man, but she feared Hayden wouldn’t want her then. And she wasn’t about to be denied now.
He looked at her as a woman, not a possession or drough. He saw her as she had longed to be seen. And he touched her as she had only dreamt about.
Hayden lightly wound his fingers around her wrist and pulled her finger from his mouth. He kissed her palm before flicking his tongue over the skin.
“Such passion,” he whispered.
Isla shivered. This was a side of Hayden she had never thought to see, a side that touched her deeply all the way to her soul. It was a side she found she greatly enjoyed.
“I cannot wait any longer.” He kissed her neck where her pulse pounded. “I have to have you.”
Isla wound her arms around his neck. “Then take me.”
His hands gripped her hips and raised her until she hovered over his cock. He moved her back and forth so that the tip of him teased her swollen, sensitive sex.
She dropped her head back and moaned at the pleasure. He slowly lowered her onto the head of his shaft. The feel of him large and imposing as he began to stretch her.
Alarm coursed through her. Isla opened her mouth to tell him she was a virgin still, but before she could, he pushed inside her the same time he pulled her down.
Isla’s gaze was locked with his. She saw his eyes widen in surprise, then his brow furrow in anger. Pain speared through her, but she refused to show any weakness, refused to cry out. He was huge, too huge for her.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were untouched?” he demanded in a low voice filled with fury and disbelief.
Isla inwardly cringed at his harsh tone. “I thought you wouldn’t want me.”
He placed a hand alongside her face. “If I’d have known I wouldn’t have hurt you. I would have gone slower, but I would still have wanted you.”
She blinked, unsure of what to say. She was to blame for her pain. But by the look on his face she could tell he took the fault as his own.
“My lack of … experience doesn’t matter?” she asked hesitantly.
He ran his thumb over her bottom lip before he kissed her soundly, completely. “Nay. Are you in pain?”
“It’s beginning to ebb.”
“Good,” he said before he rocked her hips forward.
Isla bit her lip, expecting to feel more pain. Instead, heat flooded her body. The more she moved against him, the more her body wanted. She had thought him big, but now that her body had adjusted, he slid farther inside her, filling her even more.
“Aye,” he murmured and kissed her neck just below her ear. “Open your body to me.”
Isla was powerless to do anything but what he wanted. He moved her hips, slowly, lovingly while her body continued to adjust for him. When he was fully sheathed, he let out a low groan and covered her mouth with his. He kissed her deeply, leisurely.
“Move as you want,” he instructed her.
For a moment Isla could only sit there, the feel of him inside her blocking out everything else. Isla rotated her hips and moved them front to back. The friction of their bodies had the flames of desire licking at her body once more.
She could feel her body building back up to what had occurred before her first climax. She wanted that again, wanted to feel it with Hayden inside her.
Isla held onto Hayden as her body began to spiral out of control. His arms locked around her, his breathing harsh and ragged as he thrust inside her.
He moaned and began to lift her up and down his rod. Isla could do nothing but experience the bliss of having him fill her time and again. His tempo increased and he went deeper, so deep he touched her womb.
Isla heard him whisper her name a heartbeat before his fingers dug into her back and he thrust inside her hard and fast. She could feel his cock pumping his seed inside her, and to her surprise, she peaked a second time.
Hayden held her against his chest, softly stroking her hair until she had come down. He was still inside her, holding her as tenderly as a lover would.
She dropped her head onto his shoulder and sighed. He lifted her off him and laid her on the bed before he rose and walked to the pitcher of water.
Isla watched as he poured water over a cloth and wrung it out. He sat beside her and spread her legs. It never occurred to her that she would need to be cleaned.
There were no words between them as he washed her blood and his seed first from her body, then his own. She expected him to leave then, to force some pretty words and go. Instead, he simply stared at her.
“You gave yourself to me,” he said. “Why?”
Isla glanced away. How did she tell him he had called to her on a level she didn’t understand? That she hadn’t wanted to give in, but her body hadn’t been her own?
“Is it wrong to wish to feel some happiness? Do I not deserve it?” she asked instead.
He reached out a finger and played with the ends of her hair. “I never said that. I’m simply wondering, why me?”
“You mean why you because you despise drough?”
“Aye.”
Isla blew out a breath. “You saw me. Despite who and what I am, you saw me for me. I’ve had men lust after me. I’ve had men
try to force themselves on me. But I’ve never had a man look at me with such desire or kiss me with such fire and hunger.”
Silence descended upon them until finally Isla asked what she needed to know. “Why me? Why did you come to me if you hate what I am?”
“That is a question, isn’t it?” he asked. “I’m not sure I can answer it.”
She sat up and almost reached for him, but at the last moment decided against it. “You were tender with me, concerned even when you learned I was still a virgin. I thank you for that.”
Hayden lifted a strand of her hair to his face and inhaled. “I think we’ve both made a muck of things.”
“Whatever happens, I won’t regret this night.”
He dropped her hair and stood. Without another word he began to dress. Isla watched him, fascinated with every aspect that was Hayden.
When he finished he glanced at her and climbed onto the window. She waited to see his Warrior form, to know what color he would turn, but he melded into the shadows and then was gone.
NINETEEN
Hayden knew he was a fool. Even as he hurried away from Isla, he longed to return. It had stunned him to his very core to learn she had never been taken by a man. He’d been angry at her for not telling him, and angry at himself for being so rough with her.
But, by the saints, she was a passionate woman. She brought out a side of him he hadn’t known he’d had.
Knowing he had been the first to lay claim to her spectacular body excited him, made him long for another taste of her.
Hayden climbed into his chamber from his window. He wished Logan was there, though he knew he wouldn’t confide in his friend. What had happened between him and Isla was private.
Because you doona want others to know you gave into a drough.
Hayden wanted to deny it, but that was part of the reason. As much as he wanted to think Isla was different, she wasn’t. She was a drough, had welcomed the evil into her. She might have pushed the evil aside for the moment, but the truth of the matter was that she had done terrible things.
He kicked off his boots and ran his hands down his face, weary to his core. He then lay back on the bed and threw an arm over his eyes.
No matter how hard he tried, sleep eluded him. He kept seeing Isla’s beautiful face and amazing body in his mind’s eye. He could still hear her moans, her soft cries of pleasure. She had screamed his name, just as he had wanted.
He should have stayed with her. If he had, he’d have taken her again. He had given her pleasure, that he knew. Her first sexual experience should have been with someone who cared about her, someone who would stand by her side.
He wasn’t that man. Yet, as much as he regretted being with her, he wondered if he’d have the willpower to turn away from her the next time.
And he knew he wouldn’t.
“Damn me,” Hayden mumbled.
This couldn’t be happening to him. When he’d found his parents, he’d vowed to them he’d find their killer and meet out his vengeance. As the strongest warrior of his clan he’d always been there to protect his family. He had never failed them until that night.
And with his family’s death, Deirdre had come for him. So much had changed that night. Everything he had been had died along with his family.
*
Isla was up early and baking in the kitchens. She had managed a few hours sleep without the nightmares, her dreams instead filled with Hayden and his kisses. A very welcome reprieve, but one that made her realize everything she had missed out on while being in Cairn Toul.
She was sore, and every time she moved, it reminded her of a night she would never forget. Even now as she kneaded the dough for the bread she found herself thinking of Hayden.
Though nothing had changed, she saw the world with new eyes now. She had known what happened between a man and a woman, but to experience it herself, and with someone like Hayden, it gave her a new perspective.
Now she really understood the looks passed between lovers like Cara and Lucan, Marcail and Quinn, and Larena and Fallon. She recognized the secret smiles shared between them, and the small touches.
It should have been enough. Months ago it would have been enough. But now that Isla had seen what her life could have been, what it could be, she wanted more. She wanted what Cara, Marcail, and Larena had.
Isla’s chances of ever finding that kind of happiness were slim, even if she did allow herself to get close to anyone. Yet the longing was still there. She feared it would now always be there.
“Up early again, I see,” Cara said as she walked into the kitchens and began to get the morning meal ready.
Isla shrugged. “I used to spend most of my days in the kitchens baking. It seems natural still.”
“Well, I know the men will enjoy it.” Cara smiled and stuck her hands in the dough. “With Galen being gone for a while maybe now some of the others can get more food.”
Isla grinned. “You baked Galen a loaf of bread just for himself, didn’t you?”
“I did,” Cara said with a chuckle. “He was like a young lad always begging for food. He would even come into the kitchen and try to steal food. He’ll be sorry he missed your pastries.”
“I’ll bake him extra when he returns.” Isla said the words without realizing she might not be around when Galen came back.
Cara paused in her kneading and glanced at Isla. “So you are planning to stay? I worried you might yet want to leave.”
“You’re not still thinking of leaving, are you, Isla?” Marcail asked as she walked into the kitchen. “I thought you had decided to stay.”
Isla exchanged a look with Cara. “I’m not leaving. Yet.”
“Good,” Marcail said as she stroked the fires of the ovens. “We’re enjoying having another woman about.”
Cara turned to Marcail. “How are you feeling this morn?”
As the two talked of Marcail’s pregnancy and the sickness that came to her every morning, Isla felt a longing to share her problems as she used to with her sister. She had thought she didn’t need anyone, but being around the women had changed Isla’s views.
Larena paused beside Isla, her eyes full of concern. “Everything all right?”
Isla forced a smile and nodded. “Just thinking of my sister.”
“You two were very close, then?” Marcail asked.
Isla thought back to the nights they would stay up talking, dreaming of when they would find husbands and have families of their own. Even after Lavena married, they had stayed close. “Aye.”
“I wish I’d have had a sister,” Cara said wistfully.
Larena walked around the work table and put her arm around Cara. “You do. You have all of us.”
Marcail moved next to them and they pulled her in their hug. It was a touching moment, one that Isla felt she intruded upon.
“Aye,” Cara said. “You are my sisters, just as Sonya and Isla are.”
Isla knew she shouldn’t be included, and that Cara was just being kind. Yet it felt nice. She smiled and kept her hands moving in the dough. The moment had touched a part of her heart that Isla thought long dead.
By the time she had set the dough to rising, she had obtained control of her emotions again. Which was a good thing since the morning meal was under way and everyone was in the great hall.
Malcolm entered the castle and took his place at the farthest end of the table. He spoke only to Larena as he passed her, and then just briefly. Isla saw the hurt in Larena’s eyes for her cousin.
Isla had seen such defeat in men before. Malcolm was alive, but he wasn’t living. He merely existed until the time came for his death. Until then, he would walk about as nothing more than a shade of his former self.
As soon as Isla caught sight of Hayden she forgot all about Malcolm. Just seeing Hayden caused her heart to beat faster. She tried not to stare at him, but she couldn’t help it. He was magnificent.
The fact he didn’t spare her even a glance caused Isla to frown. She didn’t e
xpect him to get down on one knee and spout poetry, but they had shared something special.
Or had they? It had been extraordinary to her, but maybe to Hayden she was nothing more than someone to ease his need. If that was the case, he would treat her as he normally did.
However, as the meal progressed, Isla didn’t feel his gaze on her once. She kept her own from straying to him, no matter how hard it became. Hayden had never sought her out, had never spoken to her unless he had a direct question, but he had watched her. Always his gaze had been on her.
Isla looked up to find Ramsey staring at her. His gray eyes seemed to notice all. If she didn’t know he held no magic, she would think he was a Druid. It was the way he gazed at her, as if he could see inside her very soul. Her father used to look at her like that.
“You are troubled,” Ramsey said.
Isla glanced around her, but everyone was deep in conversation and didn’t hear him. “Of course I’m distressed. Deirdre isn’t dead.”
“There’s more to it than that. It is not good for the soul to carry such burdens. You should share what is troubling you.”
Isla found it difficult to breathe. Those had been her father’s exact words to her on many occasions. Her father used to recite those words by ancient Druids whenever something bothered Isla or her sister.
Ramsey lifted a single black brow. “Do you not agree?”
“My father used to tell me that.”
“Then he was a wise man. Did you listen to him?”
Isla slowly nodded.
Ramsey shrugged and bit into an oatcake. “Perhaps you will take my advice then.”
She leaned forward so that her words would only reach him. “Did you have a Druid in your family?”
He paused and turned those steely gray eyes to her again. “Druids have walked this land since the beginning of time. We all have Druids in our ancestry.”
“True enough.” Isla straightened. Ramsey had said all the right words, but she knew there was more to his past than he was letting on.
Unable to help herself, Isla glanced at Hayden. He was turned with his back to her talking to Camdyn. She regretted looking as soon as she had done it.
