Dash it all.
Was he going to shadow her every move today? Why have a governess at all? Why didn’t he just take charge of their education himself? Surely, he was capable, and he seemed as if he liked to control everything. She groaned in frustration. She wanted to rail at him, she wanted to have a row with him, but that would probably only get her sacked, and she didn’t have any thoughts of what she could do if she left this place.
The only alternative was to go back to where she had come from. And, having been free of her mother for such a short amount of time had been strangely liberating. She didn’t think she could go back now…she cherished her independence too much.
She walked as quickly as possible back to her bedchamber, reached for a redingote and a bonnet and gloves that would match the black dress, she wore, and then hurried back to the nursery, where, as he had promised, he waited.
He stood with his back to her this time, as he stared out the window. He cast a lonely silhouette. He looked as if he had lost everything in the world and was quite adrift. As if he needed a guiding light…he needed something to anchor him to this world.
The floorboard creaked, as she came into the nursery, and caught his attention. He turned back to her, and gazed upon her with a look that made her insides twist. He was by far the handsomest man she had ever laid eyes upon. Not like any of the men she had met before. He might not be quite as handsome as Lord Prescott, but he had something Lord Prescott lacked. He had something that was broken inside of him, and suddenly, she wanted desperately to heal him.
Dark and brooding, he was the sort she should have shied away from—and yet, she was fervently tempted to throw herself at him instead. It was a most unusual sensation for her.
She should want to flee…she should want to run like she had wanted to do only moments earlier, and yet, with the way he looked now… as if his world was in tatters around him, she sympathized with him. She had felt that way more often than not, in the last few months. She had felt this way ever since her mother had decided to marry her to a man of her own choosing—not Ruby’s.
His penetrating gaze settled upon her. His eyes were the colour of silken amber. She quickly looked away before he continued to cast his spell over her.
“I hope that while here, Miss Massey, that you can mend your broken heart,” he said softly.
Had he somehow guessed her thoughts? She felt a little undone by it all, and a little warm. She was probably quite flushed.
“I…uh, I don’t seem to follow you, sir…”
“I speak of your broken heart, Miss Massey. I take it you came here because you were cast out of your childhood home, and made to fend for yourself.” It looked as if the Duke had made altogether too many assumptions about her past. “I assume your father has died, and you were put out by those who inherited? It has happened so many times before, Miss Massey. Don’t be ashamed about it. I think it is a damn shame when family members do that to their own. I…I worry that someday that could befall Lady Miranda and Lady Cordelia. I am the last of their immediate family. I have a few cousins that would probably take them in, once he inherited my title…” he sighed. “Alas, I wouldn’t want them to be raised by those people. They would treat them as if they were poor relations.”
She remained silent. If she attempted to tell him the contrary to what he believed, it would more than likely fall on deaf ears. He had made a romantic story up about her in his mind, and if she shattered it now…it might cost her.
“I…Your Grace, I am here now, and I would rather not reflect upon the past. You took me on without references, and without knowing much about me. I thought that was enough for you,” she said shakily.
Why was her forcing her into this corner? She felt as if he had put her into a box, and she had nowhere and no one turn to…she was trapped. She had hoped that when she came here that she wouldn’t be put into this position. She had hoped she wouldn’t have to see hide nor hair of him. Then again, she hadn’t thought he was a duke either. He had concealed things about himself, so she could do the same, without feeling a bit guilty.
“You are right, Miss Massey. It was enough for me. I am interested in finding out things about you that others couldn’t possibly tell me. I want to know what kind of a heart you have, and what kind of a person you are. So far, I have not been disappointed. I hope that over time, you shall feel as if you can confide in me more. I am rather thin on having adult companionship around here—companionship that is fit for my company, anyhow. I am quite certain you…you probably have an Honourable before your name…don’t you?”
She barely knew him, and yet, he thought she would confide in him? He obviously needed to think clearly. Why would she tell him anything? She had never felt so nervous in all of her life. She was so damn scared. Her feet wouldn’t budge from their spot. She couldn’t run from him, even though she desperately wanted to. If only he know. She was just Miss Ruby Massey. Her father hadn’t been titled. He had been the distant cousin of a bloody baronet. It was certainly nothing to boast about.
He regarded her steadily, and she felt as if he was looking right into her soul. Oh, heavens, those eyes. She could bloody well drown in them. She had to put up a wall. She had to make him know in no uncertain terms that she had no desire to be pulled into his world. His world would suffocate her.
But no matter how much she wanted to tell him that she was only here to teach his nieces, and nothing more, she couldn’t get the words to pass her lips.
There was no point in continuing on this perilous course. The girls scampering back into the room was a welcome interruption. She sighed, relieved that she wouldn’t have to continue to struggle to make civil whiskers with him. She watched Lady Miranda walk over to Joan, pick her up, and put her into her basket.
“I am just Miss Ruby Massey. No Honourable, sir, only Miss. I have, and never will be known, as The Honourable Miss Ruby Massey, and besides, it isn’t usually used when speaking aloud, is it?”
“Our father was an earl. He was…” Lady Miranda’s voice trailed off, and sadness marred her features. Ruby wanted to know why mentioning her father had elicited such a change within the girl.
Lady Miranda’s strong voice seemed to pull him out of his brooding mood, for his eyes finally left her to settle upon his nieces. The soft love that filled them, made the nervous twisting in her gut stop. At least she knew one thing about him he adored Lady Miranda and Lady Cordelia.
Who was their father? Their surname was Penberthy. She didn’t know what their father’s title had been.
“Well, girls, come along, then. Let us go and show Miss Massey a bit of the Estate. We can lead her down to the chapel, and…”
“Why don’t we stay to the main gardens?” Ruby suggested. She didn’t want him leading her to the chapel. She was quite fine with staying close to the house.
“Oh, don’t you want to see the woods on the Estate, Miss? They are beautiful, and said to be inhabited by pixies and giants alike, and there is a lovely little brook that runs through it, said to be guarded by water pixies,” Lady Miranda said dreamily. “Uncle had a run in with the pixies when he was a child, didn’t you, Uncle Phineas?”
He cleared his throat at Lady Miranda’s question, and the relaxed look in his eyes diminished. “I am not entirely certain she would want to hear about that, Miranda. We shall save that story for another day.”
“Aye, Uncle,” Lady Miranda said obediently. “Come along, Miss Massey.” She walked up to her, and boldly grabbed her by the hand. “We shall lead the way. Why don’t we go and look at the maze that is on the grounds, or the Orchards? They are always grand fun, and there are plenty of trees that we have dropped their beautiful leaves. We shan’t have to venture into the woods,” Lady Miranda continued, happily talking away, as if she hadn’t a care in the world.
Lady Cordelia looked stricken. She didn’t know whether to try to keep hiding behind Lady Miranda, and with a quick furtive glance to her uncle, she finally made her decision. Walki
ng over to Lady Miranda and Ruby, she shyly slipped her hand into Ruby’s free one.
It was a start, and by the look on the Duke’s face, it was something even he hadn’t been able to obtain. Why was Lady Cordelia so fearful of him? He didn’t seem as if he was a monster…and yet, she was quite apprehensive of him. There had to some underlying reason for it. There had to be a source of her fear, and she wanted to know what had made her so wary of the Duke. Was she just afraid of him, or did her fear encompass all men?
Somehow, someway, Ruby would have to summon enough courage to ask the Duke about it.
If anyone had the answers she sought—it would be him.
Chapter Seven
Finn watched as Miranda and Cordelia showed Ruby around the gardens. Ruby stopped to admire the dark purple chrysanthemums, and then, Miranda and Cordelia broke away from her to run around a bit and start collecting the leaves that had fallen from the trees. The kitten played around them, and started to play with a leaf that was blowing in the wind.
They had a large oak on their property that had stood for probably almost a thousand years, and plenty of its leaves were covering the ground like a blanket of red and gold.
Acorns littered the ground, and he saw that Cordelia was trying to pick up some of them as well and put them into her basket. She gave up and ran over to where their chestnut tree was and started to pick up the nuts there. She shoved some into the pockets on her cloak, and put some more into her basket that hung off her arm. Then, she fell into a pile of leaves, and laughed gaily. Her infectious laughter echoed throughout the gardens, and he saw the outdoor staff stop in the middle of their chores to look to see where the laughter had come from. The outdoor staff Finn hadn’t sacked. They hadn’t been picked by the Earl. Some of them were stricken in years…and had their sons working with them now.
They were still growing accustomed to the laughter coming back to Penryn House. It was a shame it had gone in the first place, and he had vowed that he would never run his house the way his sister’s husband had done.
He walked over to Ruby, and sighed heavily, as he watched Miranda and Cordelia run about, laughing, as they picked up leaves, and then dropped them, and investigated the little things that piqued their interest.
“Why…why won’t Lady Cordelia go near you?” Ruby asked softly, smiling at the sound of Miranda and Cordelia giggling, as they started to make piles out of the leaves so they could jump into them. Once they had gotten tired of that, they got up and ran over to the swing that hung from the oak tree, and Cordelia hopped up onto it, and let Miranda push her.
They were having a grand time, and he wished they could remain like this forever. This was perfection. This was the way life should have always been for them. This was the way his childhood had been after the dragon nursemaid had been banished.
He delayed answering Ruby’s question for a few moments. How much could he tell her? He liked what he saw so far, but he could be wrong about her, and he didn’t want her to spread the gossip that someone who knew what had actually happened could spread. They could do a lot of damage to his family, and Miranda and Cordelia had already been through enough.
“I…Lady Cordelia is wary of men,” he said, keeping his voice as calm as possible considering how he felt on the inside. “From what I have heard, she has always been a sensible soul. She didn’t see a lot of me before her mother died, and it…it was my fault. I was the one to blame. I kept myself in London, near what I thought was all of the fun. I lived it up during the Season…well, I confess, I lived it up all year round…I had myself a rollicking good time. I even kept a mistress,” he looked out the corner of his eye at her, and noticed her flinch at his words.
“Many men keep mistresses, well, those who can afford them do,” she said, her voice shaking slightly. She kept her gaze focused on Miranda and Cordelia, even though he desperately wanted to see the glint in Ruby’s eyes. She probably disapproved. She probably thought less of him now. Of course, they barely knew each other, so he shouldn’t be at all concerned with what she thought of him.
“Aye, that they do, Miss Massey,” he chuckled dryly. “I decided to sow my wild oats by keeping a woman. It was a mistake, now that I reflect back upon it. My sister let me go about foolishly thinking that everything here was as it had always been—splendidly tranquil. This place—“he gestured around, “Penryn House has always been a haven for my family. From the moment my mother married my father, she made it quite clear to him that she would always return here whenever she wished, as it was the place of her heart. She had been an heiress, and this was only a part of her inheritance. He loved her, and agreed that she could always have whatever she wished. And so, this became the second seat for our family. This beautiful place became our family’s little secret. This is the world away from the world. Our sanctuary. After my sister’s marriage, it was where she made her home. Her husband…” he broke off, needing to take a break.
“I think I should go and see if they need anything,” she rushed out, attempting to hurry away. He reached out his hand, and pulled her gently back.
“No…you should know a little about why Cordelia is so apprehensive of me. I don’t want you thinking it is because I am the monster of her world.”
“No…” her cheeks were a bright red, and he didn’t think it was because of how cold it had suddenly become. “I wouldn’t think that,” she said, looking to where his hand rested on her arm.
“You wouldn’t?” he asked softly.
He continued to fall for her. Her eyes filled with sadness and sympathy. Her eyes contained emotion, and it was something he sorely missed seeing. Giselle had been quite cold compared to Ruby.
“No,” she whispered, giving him a tentative smile.
“Good,” he said, taking a moment to admire her prettiness. He could drown in her beautiful green eyes, and lose his soul in her soft smile.
“My sister’s husband was an earl…but he had no money. His was an empty title, and he latched onto my sister like a starved man. He charmed her, and he was good looking enough, I grant you, but he hid a part of himself from her that she never quite anticipated. When I returned from the Wars, it was already too late. The deed had been done. The die had been cast. She had married the bloody wretch. There was nothing, I could do about it. I agreed that they could live here at Penryn House, and all seemed as if she had been assured her life of matrimonial bliss, as I had always hoped for her.
“Miranda must have been about three years old when I left to make my life in London, and Isolde was carrying Cordelia. I never should have gone. I should have remained here at Penryn House where I could keep a watchful eye on my sister, and her family. Instead, I decided to take the selfish route—I decided to wipe clear the horrors of what I had seen during the Wars, by becoming one hell of a libertine in London. And during my times when I felt sober enough, and responsible enough, I did my duty and traveled out to Yorkshire where our main family seat is, to check on my interests there. Fortunately, I have a capable Steward in Yorkshire, whom I trust explicitly. My sister would have been far better served marrying him, then the wastrel she did marry.”
“I take it…I take her life wasn’t an easy one with him?”
“Not easy,” he sighed, “Oh, no. Certainly not, and she was too proud to write to me and relay to me her troubles. She was too proud to tell me that she needed help. I like to think that she was too proud and not too afraid to confide in me. Too afraid that I would be disappointed in her, and that I would tell her she had willingly married the man and that she had better do her duty by him, and put up with everything he did. I fear she thought I would tell her that there was no escape for women when it came to marriage, but I wouldn’t have. I would have been on her side, and I have to live with the thought that she didn’t think she could confide in me until it was too late.”
Chill shot straight through Ruby’s heart. She couldn’t fathom what he said…what he was leading to. She looked at Lady Miranda and Lady Cordelia and sighe
d heavily. She had heard of men like their father. She had heard whispered murmurings of it during her time at other people’s houses. Her uncle had tried to shield her from that part of life—but she had overheard him talking to her mother one night about one of the men who battered his wife and his children. To say that he had been incensed, would be putting it mildly. Her uncle had railed against not being able to help the woman and her family, saying that it wasn’t fair—that that it wasn’t right they had to suffer in silence.
Her uncle, her larger than life big blustering uncle, he had a heart of gold, and wouldn’t think to raise a hand to any woman, and she had loved him for it, and now, now her heart yearned to be back with him.
Why had she left?
His hand still rested on her arm, and he looked as if he wanted to reach for her hand instead of keeping his hand on her arm. Instead, she pulled away from him, and moved to face him. She could only stay this way for a few moments, as she now had her back to Lady Miranda and Lady Cordelia.
Tears shimmered in her eyes. She had drawn away from Finn, to face him, and now, now he didn’t want to continue with his story that related how and why Cordelia feared him.
“This is obviously too much for your delicate sensibilities,” he said gruffly, attempting to conceal his own emotions.
“Devil take my delicate sensibilities,” she hissed. “I am stronger than I look, sir. Continue, before they grow tired of the games they are playing. Before…before we are interrupted.”
He drew in a shattering breath. “Isolde finally reached out to me. By the urgency of her missive, I knew I had to leave London behind, and hasten to her side. I knew that she needed me. It took me days to reach Cornwall, and once I arrived, I found the house in utter chaos,” he sighed. “I walked in on a terrible scene…the likes of which, I don’t ever want to see again, and now that I think about how I reacted to seeing it, I do not think you need to know the heartbreaking details. Let us just leave it at this, Miss Massey. My niece views all men as monsters as her father was one—and she can’t see beyond her nightmares to let me into her world. Her mother told her to trust me, and yet, she cannot. I can’t fault her, how could I after I saw what a brute that bastard was?”
His Bewitching Jewel (A Regency Holiday Romance Book 7) Page 7
